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St. James Brown

HighfireHighfire Registered User regular
edited December 2007 in Social Entropy++
It was the night of the 24th. And all through the pad, not a thing was bumbin’.
Except in the next room your mom and dad humpin’.
When all of a sudden came such a loud clamor,
I ran down stairs to see James Brown braking in with a hammer.
He kicked open the door with hair a shrew,
then pulled out a can of hairspray to fix up his do.
With a look in his eye, like a week's coke withdrawl,
he electric-slided to my minibar, and downed all my Crown Royal.
He twirled around with a lustful glair,
but with no booty in sight he began to swear.
As he looked to see what he could take,
all the time his ass would shake.
He stumble around in what look like a panic,
screaming odd things like 'Owwww….Fuck the Titanic'.
He started to get sick, and puked on the rug,
wiped his mouth and gave me, a laugh most smug.
I knew it was time to put this to a stop,
he showed me that it would not.
He tried to tackle me at full speed,
I stepped a side, kicking him in the back of the knees.
When he hit the floor, he did a somersault and roll out the door.
The sound of the cops ring out in the air,
James Brown knew it was time to get his ass out of there.
He jumped back into his car and started to drive,
over the neighbors dog he flies.
With cops on his tail, he sticks out his middle finger and yells.
“You better have some bitches next time, for I’ll be back next year!”



james_brown_1.jpg
Happy St. James Brown Day

Things to know about it....
St. James Brown Day is on the 25th of Dec. and anyone can celebrate it.


Who’s it for?
Everyone. Doesn’t matter who’s your God or what’s your faith. Everyone’s welcome.

What do I need to do?
Only three things.
1. Wear something purple or flashy.
2. Play some James Brown(doesn’t have to be all day)
3. Wish well to your fellow man. i.e.- Don’t be a Dick.

How’d this start?
This year. Last year James Brown die on the 25th. And because Xmas is really only for one group of people, I think it’s not all that fair. But with James Brown you can’t go wrong. He was about making everyone happy, even when he’s high on God.

Do I need to buy any shit for people or the house?
Not really, as long as you do the main three things. You can do what you want. From playing ‘I Feel Good’ just once at home. To dressing up and going bar hopping to get lucky.

Why should I do this?
Why not? It’s fun, easy, cheap and offends no one.

Highfire on
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Posts

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    Filler Inc.Filler Inc. Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Can I be drunk instead?

    I'm already there and it's easier.

    Also, I hear he was a fan of drinking.

    Filler Inc. on
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    HighfireHighfire Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Yes you can

    Highfire on
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    Filler Inc.Filler Inc. Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    WOOOOOOOO HAPPY ST JAMES BROWN DAY EVERYONE!

    Filler Inc. on
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    Dee KaeDee Kae Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Highfire wrote: »
    Yes you can

    Let the celebrations begin!

    Dee Kae on
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    BalefuegoBalefuego Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Paid the cost to be the boss

    Balefuego on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2007
    Ok, I don't get this. I keep hearing people say that christmas is "only for one group of people".

    So are you telling me that I'm not actually celebrating christmas? Or are you telling me I'm not actually an atheist?
    aduh

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
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    HighfireHighfire Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Well, Christmas has really lost all of it's meaning, but the part were you buy shitty thing for people and spend time wiith family.

    The real idea of Christmas was to celebrate the birth of Jesus, even though that's not the real day he was born. Just that because the Day of Lights(the real xmas) was bigger then Jesus. So the christians moved his birth day to the 25th.

    I fell that's bullshit. So if they could do it, why can't I?

    They toke away the animal sacrifice added Jesus.
    I take away the Jesus and add James Brown.

    Really the day should be spent with family, but with this there are no real set rules. But to thank James Brown for what he gave. Good music and good times.

    Highfire on
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    Filler Inc.Filler Inc. Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Druhim wrote: »
    Ok, I don't get this. I keep hearing people say that christmas is "only for one group of people".

    So are you telling me that I'm not actually celebrating christmas? Or are you telling me I'm not actually an atheist?
    aduh

    Merry christmas Dru.

    WC sucks as much as you probably remember it to have.

    Filler Inc. on
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    RanxRanx Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    I was terribly shocked when James Brown died.

    Are we going to have a St. President Ford day in two days then?

    Ranx on
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    PkmoutlPkmoutl Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    I don't think they will Canonize you as a Saint if you've been arrested for spousal abuse.

    Pkmoutl on
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    HighfireHighfire Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Ford has President Day.

    Highfire on
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    PkmoutlPkmoutl Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    That's because he was President.

    And I think it was actually Betty that was doing the abusing.

    (That's a rehab joke there for you all)

    Pkmoutl on
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    HighfireHighfire Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    If he wants to he can fall down some stairs, for Ford.

    Highfire on
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    Volucrisus AedriusVolucrisus Aedrius Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Tomorrow I am totally getting up and putting on James Brown during breakfast. Everyone in my family will be "wut?" and then I will explain.

    And my dad will totally dig it.

    Volucrisus Aedrius on
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    fightinfilipinofightinfilipino Angry as Hell #BLMRegistered User regular
    edited December 2007
    was James Brown as delicious as Gerald Ford?

    fightinfilipino on
    ffNewSig.png
    steam | Dokkan: 868846562
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    bongibongi regular
    edited December 2007
    happy wifebeating day to all!

    bongi on
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    CrackedLensCrackedLens Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    I saw James Brown and his band with Dave Matthews Band and Karl Denson's Tiny Universe (about 15 people in all on stage) in Madison Square Garden on time

    they did an awesome, 20 minute version of Sex Machine (Get On Up)

    confetti all coming from the ceiling, it was pretty fucking rad

    CrackedLens on
    XBoxLive Gamertag: ZombieKyle Secret Satan Wishlist
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    Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    edited December 2007
    http://youtube.com/watch?v=37psKso6ybw

    james brown, michael jackson, and prince on stage

    Garlic Bread on
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    MonkeybombMonkeybomb Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    sugeday666 (2 days ago) Show Hide Marked as spam
    0 Poor comment Good comment
    Reply | Spam

    Prince is stone cold girly man

    Monkeybomb on
    Xbox Live Gamertag: Triplemonkeybom
    monkeysig-1.jpg
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    StaleghotiStaleghoti Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    HIT MEH

    Staleghoti on
    tmmysta-sig.png2wT1Q.gifYAH!YAH!STEAMYoutubeMixesPSN: Clintown
    Dear satan I wish for this or maybe some of this....oh and I'm a medium or a large.
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    DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2007
    Highfire wrote: »
    Well, Christmas has really lost all of it's meaning, but the part were you buy shitty thing for people and spend time wiith family.

    The real idea of Christmas was to celebrate the birth of Jesus, even though that's not the real day he was born. Just that because the Day of Lights(the real xmas) was bigger then Jesus. So the christians moved his birth day to the 25th.

    I fell that's bullshit. So if they could do it, why can't I?

    They toke away the animal sacrifice added Jesus.
    I take away the Jesus and add James Brown.

    Really the day should be spent with family, but with this there are no real set rules. But to thank James Brown for what he gave. Good music and good times.
    waaaaaaah my family sucks and we buy each other shitty gifts and we don't really care about each other so that means christmas doesn't mean anything except to the christians
    I'm sorry you and your family suck, but don't dump your bullshit on the rest of us that still enjoy and celebrate christmas because we don't have a bunch of bullshit emotional baggage to deal with

    I'm an atheist, and I dig christmas, and it's not even really about gifts to me
    so fuck you

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    h5 druhim

    i am not a christian either

    and i am pro-christmas

    and anti-grinch

    so fuck people who hate christmas

    Pony on
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    PotUPotU __BANNED USERS regular
    edited December 2007
    I'm cool with hating Christmas if it means stealing presents from others.

    If I don't like them I can still bring them back. Everything else would be asshole-ish.

    PotU on
    2mong9u.jpg
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    HamjuHamju Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    I watched some of his funeral on TV. That was sad, but still somehow pretty rad.

    Hamju on
    kekekesigshortercuzthinsacunt.jpg
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    DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2007
    Pony wrote: »
    h5 druhim

    i am not a christian either

    and i am pro-christmas

    and anti-grinch

    so fuck people who hate christmas
    When some hipster register biscuit responds with, "I don't celebrate Christmas" when I wish them merry Christmas I just want to spit on them for being so pretentious as to think I give a fuck that they're that bitter and withered inside. Sucks to be you asshole/cunt.

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
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    AbracadanielAbracadaniel Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    I don't spend Christmas with my Family-proper, usually, because we're pretty distant and whatnot, but I do spend it with my friends and other folks I care about and enjoy being with. So yeah, Christmas is good times, with or without the Jesus

    Abracadaniel on
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    MonkeybombMonkeybomb Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    whoa

    Merry Christmas banner

    how very festive

    Monkeybomb on
    Xbox Live Gamertag: Triplemonkeybom
    monkeysig-1.jpg
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    Wise_aWise_a Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Druhim wrote: »
    Pony wrote: »
    h5 druhim

    i am not a christian either

    and i am pro-christmas

    and anti-grinch

    so fuck people who hate christmas
    When some hipster register biscuit responds with, "I don't celebrate Christmas" when I wish them merry Christmas I just want to spit on them for being so pretentious as to think I give a fuck that they're that bitter and withered inside. Sucks to be you asshole/cunt.

    Just tell them you don't care about what they think.

    You were just trying to be nice, and they lost that privelege.

    Wise_a on
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    Ness445Ness445 Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    wreaths and all kinds of fancy shit.

    ribbons, too.

    Ness445 on
    4445.gif
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    Lucky CynicLucky Cynic Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Happy Christmas everyone...

    Lucky Cynic on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    when i worked at a grocery store

    i would say to customers around this time of year "merry christmas!" as they left

    every now and again i'd get some snide asshole who was like "i'm not christian."

    and i would be like "neither am i! merry christmas!"

    Pony on
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    Lucky CynicLucky Cynic Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Pony wrote: »
    when i worked at a grocery store

    i would say to customers around this time of year "merry christmas!" as they left

    every now and again i'd get some snide asshole who was like "i'm not christian."

    and i would be like "neither am i! merry christmas!"

    I get that all the time, what I do is point out that Christmas is also a day in the calendar. Merry Christmas.

    Lucky Cynic on
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    DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2007
    exactly Pony

    people get hung up on the stupidest bullshit

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
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    MonkeybombMonkeybomb Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    haha what the shit

    Tube is going nuts on the clipart

    Monkeybomb on
    Xbox Live Gamertag: Triplemonkeybom
    monkeysig-1.jpg
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    Wise_aWise_a Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Pony wrote: »
    when i worked at a grocery store

    i would say to customers around this time of year "merry christmas!" as they left

    every now and again i'd get some snide asshole who was like "i'm not christian."

    and i would be like "neither am i! merry christmas!"
    ha!

    sometimes I'll say x-mas

    just because its from futurama

    religious people get pissed that I'm taking the christ out of christmas

    I just like futurama, like any blue-blooded american nerd.

    Wise_a on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    like holy shit people

    it is santa claus and candy canes and presents and dinner with your family and that delightful muppet movie with michael caine

    get the fuck over yourselves

    upon dissection, people who hate christmas generally fall into two camps (or a combination of both):

    1. people who hate christianity, christians, and anything remotely connected to christianity.

    2. anti-social pricks who hate their family and friends and don't like to spend time with people except when they have to

    Pony on
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    Lucky CynicLucky Cynic Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Monkeybomb wrote: »
    haha what the shit

    Tube is going nuts on the clipart

    swag.gifswag.gifswag.gif

    Lucky Cynic on
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    mrpakumrpaku Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Pony wrote: »
    when i worked at a grocery store

    i would say to customers around this time of year "merry christmas!" as they left

    every now and again i'd get some snide asshole who was like "i'm not christian."

    and i would be like "neither am i! merry christmas!"

    When I worked at a grocery store around Christmas-time, I was usually too busy keeping a tenuous hold on my sanity to actually talk to anybody.

    mrpaku on
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    MonkeybombMonkeybomb Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Monkeybomb wrote: »
    haha what the shit

    Tube is going nuts on the clipart

    swag.gifswag.gifswag.gif
    swag.gif

    Monkeybomb on
    Xbox Live Gamertag: Triplemonkeybom
    monkeysig-1.jpg
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    mrpaku wrote: »
    Pony wrote: »
    when i worked at a grocery store

    i would say to customers around this time of year "merry christmas!" as they left

    every now and again i'd get some snide asshole who was like "i'm not christian."

    and i would be like "neither am i! merry christmas!"

    When I worked at a grocery store around Christmas-time, I was usually too busy keeping a tenuous hold on my sanity to actually talk to anybody.

    near last christmas i fucked up my knee

    so they stuck me on the customer service desk

    being on powerful painkillers, i was a pretty chipper lad

    with my crutches and santa hat

    i was like a not so tiny tim

    and this one toolbox who was all like rawr about having to deal with some returns was like "why the fuck are you so happy?"

    i am like "it's christmas and i'm also on painkillers!"

    i got a reprimand

    but my manager still thought it was funny

    Pony on
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