It was the night of the 24th. And all through the pad, not a thing was bumbin’.
Except in the next room your mom and dad humpin’.
When all of a sudden came such a loud clamor,
I ran down stairs to see James Brown braking in with a hammer.
He kicked open the door with hair a shrew,
then pulled out a can of hairspray to fix up his do.
With a look in his eye, like a week's coke withdrawl,
he electric-slided to my minibar, and downed all my Crown Royal.
He twirled around with a lustful glair,
but with no booty in sight he began to swear.
As he looked to see what he could take,
all the time his ass would shake.
He stumble around in what look like a panic,
screaming odd things like 'Owwww….Fuck the Titanic'.
He started to get sick, and puked on the rug,
wiped his mouth and gave me, a laugh most smug.
I knew it was time to put this to a stop,
he showed me that it would not.
He tried to tackle me at full speed,
I stepped a side, kicking him in the back of the knees.
When he hit the floor, he did a somersault and roll out the door.
The sound of the cops ring out in the air,
James Brown knew it was time to get his ass out of there.
He jumped back into his car and started to drive,
over the neighbors dog he flies.
With cops on his tail, he sticks out his middle finger and yells.
“You better have some bitches next time, for I’ll be back next year!”
Happy St. James Brown Day
Things to know about it....
St. James Brown Day is on the 25th of Dec. and anyone can celebrate it.
Who’s it for?
Everyone. Doesn’t matter who’s your God or what’s your faith. Everyone’s welcome.
What do I need to do?
Only three things.
1. Wear something purple or flashy.
2. Play some James Brown(doesn’t have to be all day)
3. Wish well to your fellow man. i.e.- Don’t be a Dick.
How’d this start?
This year. Last year James Brown die on the 25th. And because Xmas is really only for one group of people, I think it’s not all that fair. But with James Brown you can’t go wrong. He was about making everyone happy, even when he’s high on God.
Do I need to buy any shit for people or the house?
Not really, as long as you do the main three things. You can do what you want. From playing ‘I Feel Good’ just once at home. To dressing up and going bar hopping to get lucky.
Why should I do this?
Why not? It’s fun, easy, cheap and offends no one.
Posts
I'm already there and it's easier.
Also, I hear he was a fan of drinking.
Let the celebrations begin!
So are you telling me that I'm not actually celebrating christmas? Or are you telling me I'm not actually an atheist?
aduh
The real idea of Christmas was to celebrate the birth of Jesus, even though that's not the real day he was born. Just that because the Day of Lights(the real xmas) was bigger then Jesus. So the christians moved his birth day to the 25th.
I fell that's bullshit. So if they could do it, why can't I?
They toke away the animal sacrifice added Jesus.
I take away the Jesus and add James Brown.
Really the day should be spent with family, but with this there are no real set rules. But to thank James Brown for what he gave. Good music and good times.
Merry christmas Dru.
WC sucks as much as you probably remember it to have.
Are we going to have a St. President Ford day in two days then?
And I think it was actually Betty that was doing the abusing.
(That's a rehab joke there for you all)
And my dad will totally dig it.
steam | Dokkan: 868846562
they did an awesome, 20 minute version of Sex Machine (Get On Up)
confetti all coming from the ceiling, it was pretty fucking rad
james brown, michael jackson, and prince on stage
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Prince is stone cold girly man
Dear satan I wish for this or maybe some of this....oh and I'm a medium or a large.
I'm sorry you and your family suck, but don't dump your bullshit on the rest of us that still enjoy and celebrate christmas because we don't have a bunch of bullshit emotional baggage to deal with
I'm an atheist, and I dig christmas, and it's not even really about gifts to me
so fuck you
i am not a christian either
and i am pro-christmas
and anti-grinch
so fuck people who hate christmas
If I don't like them I can still bring them back. Everything else would be asshole-ish.
Merry Christmas banner
how very festive
Just tell them you don't care about what they think.
You were just trying to be nice, and they lost that privelege.
ribbons, too.
i would say to customers around this time of year "merry christmas!" as they left
every now and again i'd get some snide asshole who was like "i'm not christian."
and i would be like "neither am i! merry christmas!"
I get that all the time, what I do is point out that Christmas is also a day in the calendar. Merry Christmas.
people get hung up on the stupidest bullshit
Tube is going nuts on the clipart
sometimes I'll say x-mas
just because its from futurama
religious people get pissed that I'm taking the christ out of christmas
I just like futurama, like any blue-blooded american nerd.
it is santa claus and candy canes and presents and dinner with your family and that delightful muppet movie with michael caine
get the fuck over yourselves
upon dissection, people who hate christmas generally fall into two camps (or a combination of both):
1. people who hate christianity, christians, and anything remotely connected to christianity.
2. anti-social pricks who hate their family and friends and don't like to spend time with people except when they have to
When I worked at a grocery store around Christmas-time, I was usually too busy keeping a tenuous hold on my sanity to actually talk to anybody.
near last christmas i fucked up my knee
so they stuck me on the customer service desk
being on powerful painkillers, i was a pretty chipper lad
with my crutches and santa hat
i was like a not so tiny tim
and this one toolbox who was all like rawr about having to deal with some returns was like "why the fuck are you so happy?"
i am like "it's christmas and i'm also on painkillers!"
i got a reprimand
but my manager still thought it was funny