Give me back that fillet-o-fish! (Lent thread)

ouzaru

Mysst wrote: »

being catholic just seems like no fun at all

Incorrect.

But it's not exactly a hoe-down every Sunday, no.

ascot

I did not realise it was Ash Wednesday.

The Lovely Bastard

Mysst wrote: »

I'm goin' to a party on friday, we'll see.

none of this we'll see shenanigans

do it

The Geek

religion can go suck a fuck

The Lovely Bastard

the geek how exactly does one suck a fuck

spono

I can't not see that picture without a bunch of snoops at the bottom, tons of glitter and a shooting gun

Mysst

Weaver wrote: »

Mysst let's go be wrestlemania tag-team champions

Mustang and the Asian Sensation?

ouzaru

Krentz wrote: »

I gave up lent for lent

paradooooooxxxx

This joke is about as old as Lent itself.

Faricazy

sarukun wrote: »

Krentz wrote: »

I gave up lent for lent

paradooooooxxxx

This joke is about as old as Lent itself.

i'm giving up Dru for Lent


hooooooo

The Geek

The Lovely Bastard wrote: »

the geek how exactly does one suck a fuck

Let your dear and fluffly lord figure it out. He's supposed to be all knowing.

The Lovely Bastard

The Geek wrote: »

The Lovely Bastard wrote: »

the geek how exactly does one suck a fuck

Let your dear and fluffly lord figure it out. He's supposed to be all knowing.

look, like all the cultural elite, I worship Pan, the Goat God.

And he is anything but fluffy

spono

sarukun wrote: »

Krentz wrote: »

I gave up lent for lent

time paradooooooxxxx

This joke is about as old as Lent itself.

yes but with a simple modification it can be a metal gear solid 3 joke

ouzaru

Hunter wrote: »

I want to sneak in and decorate the chalice used during communion with diamonds that says "Krunk Juice" on it. If you're going to drink alcohol out of a cup made of gold, might as well go all the way Padre.

I would be unable to sit through mass if the priest raised a chalice that said "Kunrk Juice" in diamonds during the consecration.

I would lose my shit competely.

Jordyn

Guys guys

ChurchPAX right

Seattle has a Church of Scientology! We could go there!

Fallout

The Geek wrote: »

religion can go suck a fuck

you're insane

next you'll be saying the universe operates on natural, observable phenomena

Jordyn

I don't think Scientologists give out delicious communion wafers though.

ouzaru

GRMike wrote: »

spono wrote: »

Mysst wrote: »

JohnHam wrote: »

spono wrote: »

Hunter wrote: »

Harrier wrote: »

Generally I find it more fulfilling to do something extra for Lent alongside giving something up. For the last few years I've been making my way through the Gospels, and this year I'm up to the Gospel of Luke. I'm also giving up extraneous sugar.

Also, for all Catholics, a reminder that today is supposed to be a fasting day. So no meat, but also much less food in general.

If you're going to get technical, no birth control, sex before marriage, and give them 10% of your total income for the year.

what the hell? ten percent?

I always thought it was a "throw in a dollar if you like" sort of deal

so that means there's one church employee for each church-goer?

No, I believe it is based literally on a line from the Bible that dictates one give a certain percentage of income (or total wealth?) to charity/the Church each year.

tithing, 10%

I never tithed and I'm better off than my parents who do, so y'know.

that seems like a crazy amount of money

also I meant "one church employee for every 10 church-goers" because the other way doesn't make sense

I am not Catholic, but I have never been to a Church that demands you give them 10% of your money or else...

"Tithing" is archaic and one of the several reasons for the ludicrous days of the Reformation. Nobody expects you to pay fucking TAXES to the church, just donate some money so that they can stay open and the priest can have a cheeseburger every now and again.

Hunter

sarukun wrote: »

Hunter wrote: »

I want to sneak in and decorate the chalice used during communion with diamonds that says "Krunk Juice" on it. If you're going to drink alcohol out of a cup made of gold, might as well go all the way Padre.

I would be unable to sit through mass if the priest raised a chalice that said "Kunrk Juice" in diamonds during the consecration.

I would lose my shit competely.

Praise be to God

YEEEAAAHHH!

Give your love to the Lord

OOOKAAAAYYY!

Give us money

WHAT

Donate to the church

WHAT

We need your donations

WHAT

Be nice to one another

YEAAAHHHH!

Fallout

Jordyn wrote: »

Guys guys

ChurchPAX right

Seattle has a Church of Scientology! We could go there!

i have always wanted to do that

i've never talked to a real scientologist

we could get our thetan levels checked and shit!

gotta check out their psychiatry museum next time i'm in LA, too

Hunter

Fallout wrote: »

Jordyn wrote: »

Guys guys

ChurchPAX right

Seattle has a Church of Scientology! We could go there!

i have always wanted to do that

i've never talked to a real scientologist

we could get our thetan levels checked and shit!

gotta check out their psychiatry museum next time i'm in LA, too

Just don't be glib

ouzaru

The Geek wrote: »

The Lovely Bastard wrote: »

the geek how exactly does one suck a fuck

Let your dear and fluffly lord figure it out. He's supposed to be all knowing.

Oh, he knows. He knows how to suck that fuck all night long.


But he's not going to tell you.

The Geek

Jordyn wrote: »

I don't think Scientologists give out delicious communion wafers though.

I think they hit you with geiger counters.

ouzaru

Hunter wrote: »

sarukun wrote: »

Hunter wrote: »

I want to sneak in and decorate the chalice used during communion with diamonds that says "Krunk Juice" on it. If you're going to drink alcohol out of a cup made of gold, might as well go all the way Padre.

I would be unable to sit through mass if the priest raised a chalice that said "Kunrk Juice" in diamonds during the consecration.

I would lose my shit competely.

Praise be to God

YEEEAAAHHH!

Give your love to the Lord

OOOKAAAAYYY!

Give us money

WHAT

Donate to the church

WHAT

We need your donations

WHAT

Be nice to one another

YEAAAHHHH!

It's easy for individual churches to ask for cash to fix their leaky roofs or whatever, but the concept of a body so mind-blowingly rich that their property cannot be properly insured in the traditional sense (Vatican City, the various churches and cathedrals of Rome) asking for any of your money is a little bit silly.

Fallout

Hunter wrote: »

Fallout wrote: »

Jordyn wrote: »

Guys guys

ChurchPAX right

Seattle has a Church of Scientology! We could go there!

i have always wanted to do that

i've never talked to a real scientologist

we could get our thetan levels checked and shit!

gotta check out their psychiatry museum next time i'm in LA, too

Just don't be glib

i should be okay, i know what ritalin is

Hunter

sarukun wrote: »

Hunter wrote: »

sarukun wrote: »

Hunter wrote: »

I want to sneak in and decorate the chalice used during communion with diamonds that says "Krunk Juice" on it. If you're going to drink alcohol out of a cup made of gold, might as well go all the way Padre.

I would be unable to sit through mass if the priest raised a chalice that said "Kunrk Juice" in diamonds during the consecration.

I would lose my shit competely.

Praise be to God

YEEEAAAHHH!

Give your love to the Lord

OOOKAAAAYYY!

Give us money

WHAT

Donate to the church

WHAT

We need your donations

WHAT

Be nice to one another

YEAAAHHHH!

It's easy for individual churches to ask for cash to fix their leaky roofs or whatever, but the concept of a body so mind-blowingly rich that their property cannot be properly insured in the traditional sense (Vatican City, the various churches and cathedrals of Rome) asking for any of your money is a little bit silly.

I was going for a Krunk juice Lil' John joke though.

Jordyn

I got some pamphlets from some Scientologists once, but I didn't have time to get my thetans checked.

The pamphlets were awesome though, they had a bunch of questions to check if maybe you needed scientology that were like
"have you ever been sad?"
"Do you ever want to do stuff?"
"Do you ever NOT want to do stuff?"

Munkus Beaver

My church generally uses the money from donations to feed the homeless and do other missionary/charity projects around town.

Since donations have dropped a bit, we've cut back from our program that helps people pay bills.

Lent is a time where you either give up something or do something extra. I think I'll just go to church on Weds. I was going to give up "Drugs, Sex, and Rock n' Roll" for Lent, but I think that'd be too much.

Fire Truck

My sister's husband was raised as a scientologist. They were married by a scientologist minister(?). He's just a normal dude, though, and doesn't really know much about the weird scientology stuff that most internet people are up in arms about. The most out there thing he believes in is detox.

Still weird though.

Fallout

Munkus Beaver wrote: »

My church generally uses the money from donations to feed the homeless and do other missionary/charity projects around town.

Since donations have dropped a bit, we've cut back from our program that helps people pay bills.

Lent is a time where you either give up something or do something extra. I think I'll just go to church on Weds. I was going to give up "Drugs, Sex, and Rock n' Roll" for Lent, but I think that'd be too much.

how is missionary "work" equitable to charity

Spectre-x

Hunter wrote: »

I want to sneak in and decorate the chalice used during communion with diamonds that says "Krunk Juice" on it. If you're going to drink alcohol out of a cup made of gold, might as well go all the way Padre.

I can't stop laughing and it makes me have to pee

Spectre-x

Fallout wrote: »

Munkus Beaver wrote: »

My church generally uses the money from donations to feed the homeless and do other missionary/charity projects around town.

Since donations have dropped a bit, we've cut back from our program that helps people pay bills.

Lent is a time where you either give up something or do something extra. I think I'll just go to church on Weds. I was going to give up "Drugs, Sex, and Rock n' Roll" for Lent, but I think that'd be too much.

how is missionary "work" equitable to charity

Missionary work also often includes participating in social programs thereby spreading the gospel of compassion and yada yada.

Stuff like that, presumably.

Fire Truck

Fallout wrote: »

Munkus Beaver wrote: »

My church generally uses the money from donations to feed the homeless and do other missionary/charity projects around town.

Since donations have dropped a bit, we've cut back from our program that helps people pay bills.

Lent is a time where you either give up something or do something extra. I think I'll just go to church on Weds. I was going to give up "Drugs, Sex, and Rock n' Roll" for Lent, but I think that'd be too much.

how is missionary "work" equitable to charity

Wow, you're a tool.

Fallout

Spectre-x wrote: »

Fallout wrote: »

Munkus Beaver wrote: »

My church generally uses the money from donations to feed the homeless and do other missionary/charity projects around town.

Since donations have dropped a bit, we've cut back from our program that helps people pay bills.

Lent is a time where you either give up something or do something extra. I think I'll just go to church on Weds. I was going to give up "Drugs, Sex, and Rock n' Roll" for Lent, but I think that'd be too much.

how is missionary "work" equitable to charity

Missionary work also often includes participating in social programs thereby spreading the gospel of compassion and yada yada.

Stuff like that, presumably.

now if they could just help people without lying to them

but no, that would be missing the point

Asiina

I did the scientology stress test thing at this booth at school. I went there wanting to make fun of them, but it was just sad. The dude was all "do you ever feel sad about yourself and your life well this can help you overcome those feelings and push the bad thoughts away." I just wanted to give him a hug.

Then they told my gay friend that he should read the book to learn how to be not gay and that got them kicked off campus.

Fallout

Fire Truck wrote: »

Fallout wrote: »

Munkus Beaver wrote: »

My church generally uses the money from donations to feed the homeless and do other missionary/charity projects around town.

Since donations have dropped a bit, we've cut back from our program that helps people pay bills.

Lent is a time where you either give up something or do something extra. I think I'll just go to church on Weds. I was going to give up "Drugs, Sex, and Rock n' Roll" for Lent, but I think that'd be too much.

how is missionary "work" equitable to charity

Wow, you're a tool.

given your demonstrably poor powers of perception i can't say that accusation cuts terribly deep

Lockout

listen fallout we know

preaching to choir

let's just let it go

Fire Truck

Fallout wrote: »

Fire Truck wrote: »

Fallout wrote: »

Munkus Beaver wrote: »

My church generally uses the money from donations to feed the homeless and do other missionary/charity projects around town.

Since donations have dropped a bit, we've cut back from our program that helps people pay bills.

Lent is a time where you either give up something or do something extra. I think I'll just go to church on Weds. I was going to give up "Drugs, Sex, and Rock n' Roll" for Lent, but I think that'd be too much.

how is missionary "work" equitable to charity

Wow, you're a tool.

given your demonstrably poor powers of perception i can't say that accusation cuts terribly deep

Wait, what are you referring to? At the risk of demonstrating my poor powers of perception, yet again, apparently.

Fallout

Fire Truck wrote: »

Fallout wrote: »

Fire Truck wrote: »

Fallout wrote: »

Munkus Beaver wrote: »

My church generally uses the money from donations to feed the homeless and do other missionary/charity projects around town.

Since donations have dropped a bit, we've cut back from our program that helps people pay bills.

Lent is a time where you either give up something or do something extra. I think I'll just go to church on Weds. I was going to give up "Drugs, Sex, and Rock n' Roll" for Lent, but I think that'd be too much.

how is missionary "work" equitable to charity

Wow, you're a tool.

given your demonstrably poor powers of perception i can't say that accusation cuts terribly deep

Wait, what are you referring to? At the risk of demonstrating my poor powers of perception, yet again, apparently.

heh

Fire Truck

Fallout wrote: »

Fire Truck wrote: »

Fallout wrote: »

Fire Truck wrote: »

Fallout wrote: »

Munkus Beaver wrote: »

My church generally uses the money from donations to feed the homeless and do other missionary/charity projects around town.

Since donations have dropped a bit, we've cut back from our program that helps people pay bills.

Lent is a time where you either give up something or do something extra. I think I'll just go to church on Weds. I was going to give up "Drugs, Sex, and Rock n' Roll" for Lent, but I think that'd be too much.

how is missionary "work" equitable to charity

Wow, you're a tool.

given your demonstrably poor powers of perception i can't say that accusation cuts terribly deep

Wait, what are you referring to? At the risk of demonstrating my poor powers of perception, yet again, apparently.

heh

meh

vsove

Even when I was Catholic I was the worst at it. Never gave up anything for Lent. Though one year I did give up Coca Cola for an entire year after having drank way too much of it the previous year.

Now I go months without any, so I guess it worked out okay.