As was foretold, we've added advertisements to the forums! If you have questions, or if you encounter any bugs, please visit this thread: https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/240191/forum-advertisement-faq-and-reports-thread/
Options
My new Comic! Need Feeback
nickmarks
Registered User new member
Registered User new member
I call it "The Teenagers Guide to Reality"
http://www.theteenagersguidetoreality.com
Enjoy.
Nick
P.S. Don't be stoned and read it. jk
http://www.theteenagersguidetoreality.com
Enjoy.
Nick
P.S. Don't be stoned and read it. jk
nickmarks on
0
This discussion has been closed.
Posts
Well if anyone has any thoughts on how I could jazz it up please share. Maybe do it in flash? I plan on redoing graphics later but trying to narrow down structure and content of pages first.
not really sure myself....just doing it. I am trying to compile all my thoughts on life and the universe into a comic book form
Also, don't sign your posts, your name is right there on top... we all know it's your post... nobody is gonna take it from you.
-MagicToaster
Your thoughts on life and the universe are a little too trite and pretentious.
Also, anyone willing to read this will already know it, and everyone else won't want to read it. It's redundant, and the pictures are too big for my scroll, so it's frustrating to have to scroll and click the little arrow. You use the same few designs many times. Good luck with that, and all.
Is it un-user friendly or user unfriendly?
I really don't mind the art, but your take on the subject matter is just so cliche and not funny, that coupled with the art, it bores me to tears. I think this idea has been used millions of times, just repackaged.
I really wish I could say something nice about this, but there's really nothing there that's interesting.
Firstly, fix your user interface. It blows fat chunks. You're not going to get anyone to read it if you can't provide an easy way to get through it. If you could animate it in Flash, it would take a lot of the work out of looking at it and you might be able to keep people somewhat interested in it long enough to get to the end.
The "art" is questionable at best. It's downright dull and repetitive. You need to be able to make it interesting to look at so that you don't have people yawning after three pages.
I don't really want to talk about the subject matter, though I do agree with Elliotto. It just hurts to read it. There's nothing intellectually stimulating here. It's all incredibly insipid. You state the obvious like it is a mindblowing revelation. There isn't a single original thought in this thing you call a comic.
Alright, I really don't have the energy to go on about this any longer. At the end of it all, you need to put more effort into this if you're going to make it even moderately interesting to read.
As far as entertainment value... I felt bored with the few simple shapes repeated to many times.
If this was a joke I must have missed the punch line.
However, the time you have put into it so far shows you have some determination. For that, good job.
...That is as far as we have explored...
Gold!
Fire_Fox: I just had a baby girl:) She is 10 days old. I guess I kinda wrote it with her in mind. Something really simple to explain the world to her. I will try to Teen it up more. Also am planning on redoing artwork. Here is some of my " paint it fo reals " art..
http://www.gameartacademy.com/markscomics/
So I will try to lost the repeated shapes.
Deelock: Cool
Grifter: ROFL. I want to use that on the back of the bookjacket. "nickmarks is this generations retarded Steven Hawkins."
Thanks for the constructive crit. I will definately make it flash.
As far as it not being original...sure. I am just trying to take all the stuff I have read or been told or observed and turn it into the simplest form possible.
It also not aimed at you. If you already have the universe named and tagged then it isn't for you. But for a young person that hasn't really had much guidiance or thought to much about life. I would hope this would be a bit of stepping stone to start.
Mr. Elliotto: Will try to jazz it up for you.
Bread of Wonder: Guess I gotta work some more on it.
Mr. Orange: Will resize the pics smaller and make it more user friendly.
GreatNation: I'll take that! Thanks
SrSizzy: Yes. I think you might be right. Finding the audience for this will be hard. Will fix interface for you and scale down pics. I have huge monitor and didn't factor that in.
Spanky The Dolphin: sorry.
Utsanomiko: LOL. The agenda comes later so hold off on the sociopath remark.
Magic Toaster: Sorry. Will sign posts. I think that what you mean
nickmarks
What a total difference that clarification makes!
But with that said, I don't think it would hold the attention of the intended demographic.
See, now that I know this aspect I can completely respect the concept behind the project, but I think you need to redesign the execution.
this is a great example of using simple art and repetition in a interesting, well executed manner..
http://koti.welho.com/alaari/lodger/ilove.swf
It is a bit pretentious, even though it's for your daughter.
Outside of telling you to proofread your text, I haven't much to add that others haven't already covered.
third page, "their" should be "there"
i flipped to page 30 or so and stopped because it was taking too long to page through
stout's Amazon Wishlist | my lastFM
Sheri Baldwin Photography | Facebook | Twitter | Etsy Shop | BUY ME STUFF (updated for 2014!)
What a damn shame.
Yeah... I think yours and my definition of 'teenager' are drastically different.
Next time on Tellie Tubbies, Tinkie-Winkie gushes about solipsism while Po just says 'unlock your mind!' over and over. :P
This all might make for a quaint Channel One opening vignette, but otherwise there's too little of real messages in an overly-symbolic package.
Ha, I was wondering when somebody would point that out.
Some of the concepts/flow are interesting...but overall, there are a lot of...problems. All the ones I would've mentioned have already been said.
The "trapped" bit is vaguely unnerving, probably due in part to the fact that telling a child [that is, once your newborn understands language] that they are "trapped" in their minds, and "trapped" on the earth, along with everybody else...just doesn't seem entirely right.
Also, mentioning sex in a children [infant's?] book.
Also, the fact that your "characters" are so completely abstract and really don't look like anything a child could relate to...with hollow eyes...
...I think your entire project is kind of creepy, to be honest.
They're not Generation X-ers.
"Like, you know... sheeple." It's a whole other language and upbringing of pretentious self-satisfaction.
I was looking for an excuse to use this. Thanks, kid!
but it is annoying.
i thought i was reading postage stamps at first..then i saw the larger images...i don't know which version i liked less..
also..you're planning to teach a human about reality with
-creepy looking naked things
-a bajillion pages that all look like the page before it.
-and horrible grammar
no kid would have the patience for this, let alone teenagers.
Other than that...
20 GOTO HELL
___
NNID: carmofin
3DS: 2852 6971 9745
Throw me a PM if you add me