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"Grumpy Old Fart"
spi_der
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
Hello!
I have been making this strip for a Greek audience, a couple of years now. Nowadays, I translate it along with some other of my strips, in the English language. The main hero is a reactionary, ultra-right wing old man, who is taken care of by a Russian maid. The economic crisis plays central role in many of the strips. Naturally, I wonder whether something that makes perfect sense in greek readership translates adequately to a global audience. I post four typical strips of the series and I would appreciate the input.
I have been making this strip for a Greek audience, a couple of years now. Nowadays, I translate it along with some other of my strips, in the English language. The main hero is a reactionary, ultra-right wing old man, who is taken care of by a Russian maid. The economic crisis plays central role in many of the strips. Naturally, I wonder whether something that makes perfect sense in greek readership translates adequately to a global audience. I post four typical strips of the series and I would appreciate the input.
spi_der on
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Im sorry, i just can't stand the left's "im better and smarter than you" so the depiction of a "right" person as a buzzard that likes killing jews does nothing for me.
I find the lack of backgrounds to be distracting, but even with the addition in #7 it looks like the character is just sort of floating there.
There are some grammer issues from the translation, but i get the idea.
Im sure some people will like it. I think it's better than many strips ive seen, i just don't care for the content.
Have you considered word balloons? I think it would make the background less distracting.
It is a Greek comic, so reacting with American political knee-jerks might not be appropriate.
@spi_der , Content-wise, political cartoons will have strong reactions from almost everyone, so as you expand from a local context keep in mind that the vitriol found elsewhere will either fuel your work and give you a strong readership... or doom you to incessant frothing hate mail. Or possibly both in some fashion.
Outside of content, you have several spelling errors and some concerns with typeface and colors that make it difficult to read your text. Speech bubbles might help this become a bit more normalized. There are some inconsistencies with coloring as well (skin being colored incorrectly in the first comic, for example), and you might want to work on perspectives as your non-straight shot angles seem tilted a bit.
Can't do something about the political view, but the problem I was afraid of is mostly highlighted here: The particular local brand of right in Greece is up to a point unique, due to certain historical occurunces that are partly hinted in these strips. Of course that does not mean that we wouldn't disagree politically anyway even if you lived here as well
About the grammar issues: When the russian woman speaks, I try to convey the thick accent through intentional misspelling. If there is problem elsewhere as well, than yes, there are grammar issues.
Thanks for the input!
About the vitriol factor: As I said, this strip has been running in Greece (a hugely polarized environment nowadays) with curiously sweet reaction from the right. Of course its point is to provoke heated discussions, but nobody likes hate mail. Time will tell
2> Your speech lines can be misinterpreted as it would seem his shoe is thinking in strip #7 panel 1, and strip #2 panel could be read as the first comment being attributed to someone in the next room and 2nd comment to the russian with the angry old man just yawning.
3> The guys expression in strip #6 doesnt seem to change even though it seems it should, also panel 3 is a mess
Farberkrieg: Thanks, and I am sure I can find out double the mistkakes and the slopiness if I stare at them for too long. But at this moment I am more interested at how or if the content itself is perceived as easily understood and/or interesting. That doesn't mean that I don't welcome criticism on the art, just that I want it accompanied with criticism on the text.