How to keep busy in hospital

Thirith · May 2015

My wife is likely to have to be operated, most likely twice or three times (abdomen and chest), in the coming weeks. Being in hospital, and her general health situation, is something that is likely to leave her very depressed, and while I'll try to be there on a daily basis I cannot be there 24/7, so I'm trying to put together a list of activities that could keep her at least somewhat distracted. So far I'm thinking Netflix, audio books, podcasts (This American Life, Serial), but I'm also hoping to download the kind of games that will appeal most to her: Mahjongg, Sudoku, that sort of thing.

Do you have any additional suggestions? Anything that worked for you or your loved ones in such situations? Anything else to keep in mind when it comes to taking a patient's mind off things?

davidsdurions · May 2015

Will she have a proper TV available? Can you hook up a console and play some good story based RPGs or whatever she likes? That's probably what I would do with the time. Play those long games I normally don't have the chance to complete.

Also, arrange for friend to just stop by periodically to break up the boredom.

Maybe she can start a hobby of some sort? Knitting or rock carving or origami? Something small scale of course.

Being in hospital for any length of time sucks. She's lucky to have someone to care enough to try to smoothe it out though!

Zomro · May 2015

My family recently went through this, as my brother was diagnosed with Leukemia in February. He was in the hospital for a month, and has to go back once a month for a week at a time for follow up treatments.

He would get bored out of his mind. Luckily, he had his phone and tablet and we brought him his laptop a couple of weeks in after he regained some strength. He would still get bored now and then, but it was mainly due to being cooped up in a room for so long that got to him.

You're definately coming at it the right way. The more options your wife has should help ease boredom. Doing the same thing for a long time can get boring, but if you jump from watching TV to reading or playing a game, you can keep your interest level up. Keeps things from getting stale.

The biggest thing will br having visitors. In my brother's case, he was just happy to see anyone, even for just a few minutes. My mother would spend some days with him, we'd drop her off in the morning and pick her up on the way home from work. I spent a whole day off with him and brought my Wii U and we just played all day. Sometimes we'd only be able to visit for an hour or so, but he was happy for the time.

Obviously you can't be there 24/7, but just being there when you can will make all the difference. If others (friends, family etc) can visit, too, it will help.

Good luck to you and your wife. I hope she gets through with as little trouble as possible.

DevoutlyApathetic · May 2015

You have most of it though post surgery I was in a place where I mostly wanted non-interactive things and sleep. Netflixing through a series of some sort was common.

I might also suggest some actual books/magazines once she is feeling the desire for something more interactive but not that interactive.

bowen · May 2015

Netflix, books, audio books, maybe some DVDs.

Simple games like you've listed that don't need a lot of involvement (hospitals make you tired).

Make frequent visits. Ask the charge nurse if it's okay to chauffer them around the floor (wheelchair even if they can't walk) because getting out of the room helps.

Bring a comb and beauty care products because being able to wash and comb your hair makes you feel like a human again.

Ask if it's okay to wear normal clothes (like sweat pants/underwear) because, believe it or not, that helps your mood too.

You've got most if it covered.

Remember, you need time to recover and do you too. Get some rest and eat, don't live at the hospital, no matter how much it sucks leaving her there.

Also, I hope it goes well for your wife.

Thirith · May 2015

Thank you all for your replies. I'll definitely have to make sure to look after myself as well; in a similar situation a few years ago I didn't take care of that enough, which ended up with me having panic attacks, and that doesn't help anyone.

I'll have to look into the hospital wifi, but chances are it won't be great, so I'll need to look at alternatives there. Also, hospitals here - except the very expensive private ones - tend not to have actual TVs, just small screens on a sort of swivel that can be adjusted, so the console (which otherwise would be a great idea) isn't feasible, unfortunately.

What doesn't help is that my wife doesn't have many close friends, and she'll be in a hospital that's in a different city - 1 1/2 hours away, which isn't much in some places, but here it's half the country away. Her best friend, meanwhile, is in a mother country, though perhaps Skype is a way of her visiting, sort of.

DisruptedCapitalist · May 2015

The thing that I hated most the last time I was stuck in a hospital was the godawful daytime television shows. Fortunately our technology has advanced since 15 years ago there are a lot more options than just whatever the hospital happens to be offering on their TVs.

I don't have much more to offer than what was already mentioned on this page though. I just wanted to complain. Heh.

I hope your wife gets through this quickly and safely!

see317 · May 2015

Is a kindle or other small e-reader/tablet an option? You could preload it with a load of books or apps before the surgery in case the hospital wifi is as bad as anticipated, but it still gives the ability to internet if the wifi is better then expected.

bowen · May 2015

If the hospital wifi sucks, look into something like this:

http://www.verizonwireless.com/internet-devices/4g-lte-usb-modem-551l/
http://www.amazon.com/T-Mobile-1661-Rocket-4G/dp/B005LXHJMS

Pretty much all the major stores have them, but some have 2yr agreements like the verizon one.

mts · May 2015

bowen wrote: »

If the hospital wifi sucks, look into something like this:

http://www.verizonwireless.com/internet-devices/4g-lte-usb-modem-551l/
http://www.amazon.com/T-Mobile-1661-Rocket-4G/dp/B005LXHJMS

Pretty much all the major stores have them, but some have 2yr agreements like the verizon one.

there are actually places you can rent them too.

honestly depending on teh surgery she might just want to veg out, so plenty of reading material, a laptop with internet etc.

dispatch.o · May 2015

Depending on the procedure she may have certain positional requirements. You say abdomen and chest. So I'm going to guess a breast reconstruction with a flap.

Often you are stuck sitting up in a semi-beach chair position for a period afterwards. I suggest buying a comfortable lap tray for her to set things on. She will have drains to keep an eye on, so get something soft.

Most people just want to sleep for at least half a day after anesthesia for something like that. Maybe more depending on meds given.

One thing everyone likes is to have someone read a book aloud to them. Audiobook is fine, but the interactive nature of someone sitting there reading is way way better.

schuss · May 2015

3DS, ereader and/or tablet.

Thirith · May 2015

I'll have to look into that lap tray idea, dispatch.o - I never even thought about that, because I thought that the hospital was likely to have things along those lines. Positional requirements are definitely going to be an issue; she's had abdominal surgery before and remembers it being very painful and uncomfortable, and there's also likely to be a chest tube for a couple of days (one of the surgeries will be on her lungs).

I was also thinking of getting one of those 4G modems. I take it they require an additional SIM card, so you'd have the same expenses as with a mobile phone, right?

dispatch.o · May 2015

Thirith wrote: »

I'll have to look into that lap tray idea, dispatch.o - I never even thought about that, because I thought that the hospital was likely to have things along those lines. Positional requirements are definitely going to be an issue; she's had abdominal surgery before and remembers it being very painful and uncomfortable, and there's also likely to be a chest tube for a couple of days (one of the surgeries will be on her lungs).

I was also thinking of getting one of those 4G modems. I take it they require an additional SIM card, so you'd have the same expenses as with a mobile phone, right?

Hospitals have stuff you can set things on. Those little tables / meal tray stands really don't do much for your elbows if you want something to rest them on while you read or use a tablet though.

Small blanket, decent pillow (not expensive just be okay with throwing it out), lap cushion, headphones with some amount of noise cancel

Throw pillow .. Basically the only time ever a throw pillow serves a purpose. It gives you something to wrap around and squeeze if you cough to make coughing way less uncomfortable.

Also like others said... Bring stuff that let's her groom and feel a little human. Hair brush, ChapStick, etc. Its not so much you have to entertain that you should try to make it comfortable and secure feeling.

Neco · May 2015

Echoing suggestions that have already been made, but if the hospital will let her bring a portable modem in, then do that. I found that hospital wifi was useable, but if you actually wanted to watch something off your device, it was just basically impossible.

And this one cant be stressed enough, but HEADPHONES. ESPECIALLY if she will be sharing a room with anyone. The hospital will provide ear plugs, but sometimes you just want to listen to your favorite music. And sometimes you just dont want to hear your roomate have to use his commode. I wanted to kick myself so many times during my six day hospital experience last year for not having headphones, but every time I tried, my bed alarm would start going off, which would be followed by a nurse coming in and saying "STOP DOING THAT" and so I ccouldn't even kick myself for not having them.

Thirith · May 2015

Good news: instead of the two major operations they've now suggested to do a small op, do some tests and then try hormone therapy. It'll still mean one night in hospital, but that's a whole different world from what we were expecting. It may only postpone the big ones, but any port in a storm, eh?

Anyway, thanks again for all the kind words and suggestions. It's helped a lot, and I will keep this thread in mind for the future.

Fyndir · May 2015

bowen wrote: »

Bring a comb and beauty care products because being able to wash and comb your hair makes you feel like a human again.

I may be entirely alone in this, but I don't want to shave, or look nice, or even wash really when I'm in hospital.

I'll do those things when I go home, with my own things in my own space. Trying to deal with them in the hospital just makes me more annoyed at not being able to leave yet because everything is different on whatever level.

The point being that if someone brings me things like that I may take it poorly, because it's a frustrating and often exhausting situation.

bowen · May 2015

Eh I probably wouldn't shave either. But being able to comb/wash/wear deoderant was pretty important to g/f when she was in the hospital.

Sterica · May 2015

I feel like @Munkus Beaver is an expert here

Munkus Beaver · May 2015

Uh, really depends on where the IV is. Hand knocks you out of games, wrist does too and also hurts like hell, elbow joint can fuck up reading or playing games. Best area is the top of the forearm or that huge vein on the underside of your forearm, go on, flex a second and look at it. It is the easiest vein to hit AND it lets you do things.

Major surgery means massive painkillers. Which means reading = bad. And complicated = bad. You want really simple shit to do, most likely watch movies or TV. I found TNT to be a reliable daytime network, sometimes USA is OK. Cartoon Network also works.

As you get off the heavy shit and can think, books are good. And a gameboy, if you don't have an IV in the wrong place. Calling friends can work but be aware...you might be a bit...drunk. So you miiiiight want to take her phone away as a preventative measure.

Spuz · May 2015

The last time I was in the hospital, audiobooks were pretty much the best thing. I could follow the story when I was alert enough, or I could doze & just let the narrator's voice help block out all the hospital noises.

Munkus Beaver · May 2015

I mean, this is major surgery. When pain doesn't make you want to die you are going to be flying higher than a 747. The pain is high, the meds will be intense. Talking with her will be fun! Find out her darkest secrets! But seriously, she is going to have the thinking ability of a two year old that has been dropped on its head. Plan accordingly.

Thirith · May 2015

She's actually insanely cute when she's just come out from a full anaesthetic. Dopey, yes, and cute. :P (Okay, she's pretty cute in general, but I'd have to say that, wouldn't I?) Anyway, it's an immense relief that it'll be one night in hospital at most, and there's an outside chance they'll already let me take her home the same evening. The op they'll be doing is much less invasive than the two they'd originally been talking about (removing a growth from her lung and several from her abdomen), but it's quite possible the medical/hormonal treatment they're foreseeing for afterwards will be a challenge in itself, as it may just send her into early menopause at the age of 42, and apparently that can be anything from a minor inconvenience to a massive loss of quality of life.

Anyway, we'll just have to see what happens and be prepared, but for now I'm just glad she won't be in hospital for more than one night.

schuss · May 2015

Munkus Beaver wrote: »

Uh, really depends on where the IV is. Hand knocks you out of games, wrist does too and also hurts like hell, elbow joint can fuck up reading or playing games. Best area is the top of the forearm or that huge vein on the underside of your forearm, go on, flex a second and look at it. It is the easiest vein to hit AND it lets you do things.

Major surgery means massive painkillers. Which means reading = bad. And complicated = bad. You want really simple shit to do, most likely watch movies or TV. I found TNT to be a reliable daytime network, sometimes USA is OK. Cartoon Network also works.

As you get off the heavy shit and can think, books are good. And a gameboy, if you don't have an IV in the wrong place. Calling friends can work but be aware...you might be a bit...drunk. So you miiiiight want to take her phone away as a preventative measure.

Eh, Hand IV's don't put games out. I did a ton of precise 3DS'ing with a hand IV. You get used to how to move after a few hours.

Munkus Beaver · May 2015

schuss wrote: »

Munkus Beaver wrote: »

Uh, really depends on where the IV is. Hand knocks you out of games, wrist does too and also hurts like hell, elbow joint can fuck up reading or playing games. Best area is the top of the forearm or that huge vein on the underside of your forearm, go on, flex a second and look at it. It is the easiest vein to hit AND it lets you do things.

Major surgery means massive painkillers. Which means reading = bad. And complicated = bad. You want really simple shit to do, most likely watch movies or TV. I found TNT to be a reliable daytime network, sometimes USA is OK. Cartoon Network also works.

As you get off the heavy shit and can think, books are good. And a gameboy, if you don't have an IV in the wrong place. Calling friends can work but be aware...you might be a bit...drunk. So you miiiiight want to take her phone away as a preventative measure.

Eh, Hand IV's don't put games out. I did a ton of precise 3DS'ing with a hand IV. You get used to how to move after a few hours.

You can move sometimes, but it is fact that the more movement you have AROUND the catheter the higher chance for infiltration. Like, if you want the IV to last and it is on the hand or, God forbid, the thumb vein, games are out unless you can do em one handed.

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