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[CRY ON] This is actually the TF2 thread if you didn't know (56K ARE BABY)
Metal Gear Solid 2 Demo
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
What is Heavy Fortress 2 you say!? Heavy Fortress 2 is a Sasha-based first-person shooter where you play as heavy weapons guy! We heavies do not play deathmatch! We play other little games like cap dis point or cap dat box...these are real games NOT FOR BABIES. There is much coward-killing inbetween as well. Ho ho ho. Unlike other shooter, HF2 make things easy for heavy. Everything look nice and simple, and it reminds heavy almost of old comic books from his childhood in the mother country. No matter, you no cry about cartoon look or I give you something to REALLY cry about. Now read!
Buying Heavy Fortress 2
You get Heavy Fortress 2 in 2 ways (hoho get it?). First is dis Orange Box deal, which you buy on much spoken about Steam thing for 39.99. It include two other games you probably won't play but they are ok. Heavy play them sometimes. It is good deal yes!? If you do not wish for other games, ONLY HEAVY FORTRESS 2, you can do that too for $19.99.
Personal Computer or Fancy gaming box?
HF2 come on either your computer in your home or on other box you may have under your tele-vision. Version does not matter, only Heavy Fortress 2 matters. Play what you may enjoy, but do know this...everyone on computer is having fun, everyone on fancy gaming box is sad
.Computer also has things like maps made by players and other things that you can change game with. And I must waarrrnnn you, many Penny Arcaders are on the computer and not box. So choose carefully ho ho ho. But all that does not matter. Dis here is COMPUTER THREAD! DIS IS FANCY BOX THREAD!
Arcade servers that cost a penny
Job's server 66.55.142.242:27015 Donate
jonxp's server tf2.finalmeasure.com Donate
PMAvers's server (custom maps) 208.167.246.56:27015 Download pack for custom maps (Unzip to Steam\steamapps\<your account>\team fortress 2\tf\maps) Donate
Penny Arcade & Cake Army TF2 - Demitri's Chicago Server 8.12.20.52:27015
Map List
tc_hydro cp_well cp_granary cp_dustbowl cp_gravelpit ctf_2fort YAAARGH MARIO_KART cyberpunk ctf_badlands_classic_b3e cp_corporation_b1 cp_desertfortress ctf_mach4 cp_broma_b1 cp_redstone_b1 cp_science cp_junction
Give pennies to arcade servers!
Job and jonxp server are good for the maps that come with game. House of Non-Conformity has crazy maps made by crazy person. The Cake Army / Penny Arcade friendship server have both normal map and crazy map. All server is fun though because all server are HEAVY FORTRESS 2 All penny-costing server are friendly to BABIES but do not expect much sympathy or tears from SASHA! Dere are also people who enjoy playing Heavy Fortress 2 against other Heavies who train to be winners. This is com-pet-a-tive play and some say it stupid, some say it good, you choose.
Number one rule above all dis though is NO DICKERY!
Password for all PA servers: wang (ho ho ho)
Meet the Team
Heavy Fortress 2 has a class grouped into dis category
Heavy
Meet the Heavy
Role: Suppressive fire, meat shield. Weapons: Chain gun, Shotgun, Ham-like Fists Hit Points: 300 Speed: 77% (27% when minigun is revving up) Special: Can right click to start up his gun. This allows for instant firing without slowdown. His speed dramatically decreases when firing or revving the minigun. HF2 Wiki also have good info on Sasha's damage and other things as well.
Features
Look to Brighter Side: If your "round" is personal best (most damage done, cowards killed, time spent shooting), the game will tell you this when you are done.
Kill dat guy: You get look at your killer and maybe even take photo too! (Only if it funny though)
Taunt your enemy!: Heavy has taunt for each weapon, taunt which he has practiced many time, so use them! They are funny and strike fear into other heavies.
CRITZ: Sometime Sasha like you more than usual and shoot bullets which do 150% more damage! Sasha will tell you when this happening by giving bullets a nice crackle noise and when enemy are hit they scream in anguish! Enjoy these moments while they last, for Sasha only give them about 5-20% of the time.
New stuff! Oh boy!
Unlockable Sashas: Good friend Medic and Squishy Pyro each get three new weapons that I don't know what they use them for because this is Heavy Fortress 2. But they get these weapons after getting certain number of a-chiev-ments.
Doctor unlockables:
Blutsauger The Blutsauger is a replacement for the Medic's Needlegun. It is unlocked after completing 10 Medic-specific achievements. This new weapon no longer has the ability to score critical hits against an opponent, instead it will draw health from enemies each time a syringe hits -- making it especially useful as a weapon to retreat away from the fight while staying alive.
Kritzkrieg The Kritzkrieg is an alternative to the Medic's default medigun. It is unlocked after completing 15 Medic-specific achievements. This new medigun uses its Ubercharge not for invulnerability, but to give its recipient 100% chance to fire critical ordinance, allowing an insightful medic and medic-buddy to rip through the opposition when used strategically.
Ubersaw The Ubersaw replaces the Medic's default bonesaw with a bloodstained monster. It is unlocked after completing 20 Medic-specific achievements. Each successful swipe of the Ubersaw will restore 25% of your UberCharge meter. The trade-off? The Ubersaw swings 20% slower than its more tamer cousin, taking away some of it's killing power.
Kritzkrieg The Kritzkrieg is an alternative to the Medic's default medigun. It is unlocked after completing 15 Medic-specific achievements. This new medigun uses its Ubercharge not for invulnerability, but to give its recipient 100% chance to fire critical ordinance, allowing an insightful medic and medic-buddy to rip through the opposition when used strategically.
Ubersaw The Ubersaw replaces the Medic's default bonesaw with a bloodstained monster. It is unlocked after completing 20 Medic-specific achievements. Each successful swipe of the Ubersaw will restore 25% of your UberCharge meter. The trade-off? The Ubersaw swings 20% slower than its more tamer cousin, taking away some of it's killing power.
Fireman unlockables:
Flare Gun The [strike]Tampon[/strike] Flare Gun replaces the shotgun as the secondary weapon. It is unlocked after completing 10 Pyro-specific achievements. This gives burn-happy pyros a chance to do what they've wanted for months - set people on fire from across the room, control point, or map. Excellent for annoying enemy snipers, but using this will leave you mostly defenseless if you're in or near the water.
Backburner The Backburner replaces the Flamethrower as the Pyro's primary weapon. It is unlocked after completing 15 Pyro-specific achievements. The Backburner lacks the fancy new Compression Blast ability of the original Flamethrower, but more than makes up for it with the brutal combination of a 100% crit rate when attacking the back of an enemy, and a bonus of +50hp to the user. If you're a backstabbing enthusiast who isn't playing Spy, this is your gun.
Axtinguisher Just as shiny, but wrapped in barbed wire, the Axtinguisher replaces the default Fire Axe. It is unlocked after completing 20 Pyro-specific achievements. The Axtinguisher compliments the Pyro's tendency to set fire to things by guaranteeing critical hits on any enemy that is on fire. As a tradeoff, it does half damage against enemies who aren't burning.
Backburner The Backburner replaces the Flamethrower as the Pyro's primary weapon. It is unlocked after completing 15 Pyro-specific achievements. The Backburner lacks the fancy new Compression Blast ability of the original Flamethrower, but more than makes up for it with the brutal combination of a 100% crit rate when attacking the back of an enemy, and a bonus of +50hp to the user. If you're a backstabbing enthusiast who isn't playing Spy, this is your gun.
Axtinguisher Just as shiny, but wrapped in barbed wire, the Axtinguisher replaces the default Fire Axe. It is unlocked after completing 20 Pyro-specific achievements. The Axtinguisher compliments the Pyro's tendency to set fire to things by guaranteeing critical hits on any enemy that is on fire. As a tradeoff, it does half damage against enemies who aren't burning.
NO NEW HEAVY WEAPONS YET! BUT THEY COME NEXT HO HO
New way to play game: Called Payload!
Gold Rush is first new map to use dis gametype. BLU team must push bombcart to checkpoint to get more time to push it to final checkpoint where bomb finally blows up LIKE BOMB SHOULD! RED team try to stop BLU team just because. The bombcart will stop moving if RED team come near it. Do not ask heavy why, heavy do not know. Bombcart give you ammo and healing so it is smart for heavy to stay near cart.
Stuff for when you not playing Heavy Fortress 2
Stat-tis-tics for HF2 Heavy Fortress 2 Shirts and stuff! Is good! Arcade of Penny's HF2 Shirt! Is of heavy! Of-fish-cal HF2 stats
Fair warning to others, these kinds of HIJINKS will get you BANNED! Funny to watch, not funny to happen to
TF2 GriefingPart 2 PICTURES!
You find them in Program Files\Steam\steamapps\<account name>\team fortress 2\tf\screenshots . Type bind f5 jpeg in console to take screenshots as nice and good .jpg instead of stupid bad .tga. Use dis Paint.NET to convert .tga files to other format. If pictures are not enough for babies like you, there is always RandomEngy's guide to capturing HD movies for HF2
Finally! Pictures of heavy!
SteamID- Enders || SC2 ID - BurningCrome.721 || Blogging - Laputan Machine
Orikae! |RS| : why is everyone yelling 'enders is dead go'
When I say pop it that means pop it
Metal Gear Solid 2 Demo on
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Posts
e: I am leaving in the unintended formatting because it is awesome.
e2: I have the first post in both of the last two TF2 threads. I am such a fucking loser, god.
FLIPPY foresaw a problem!
FUCK THIS
HEAVY CIRCLE JERK OP
Resident 8bitdo expert.
Resident hybrid/flap cover expert.
That being said....
lololololololololol ha!
tuftoo, i'll see you after me and this sandwich have a chat.
And its because we are awesome Tyrant.
Go to the album of TF2 pictures I've compiled and on the right you should see a "browse tags" box. Just click on "heavy" and bada bing! Pretty pictures of my faovorite class.
Might play some TF2 right now..Maybe, maybe.
ololol ubersaw crit
wait that was mean not funny
*goes to bed
point of interest: enders was playing medic (irony) and still had top score.
Mmmfff mmmm! MMhhh mmmff mmf mm mm MMMF! Mmmhm mmhhmmhm mmf. Mmmfff mmmm! MMhhh mmmff mmf mm mm MMMF! Mmmhm mmhhmmhm mmf. Mmmfff mmmm! MMhhh mmmff mmf mm mm MMMF! Mmmhm mmhhmmhm mm mm mmmff mmf. Mmmfff mmmhmmm! MMhhh mmf mm mm MMMF! Mmmhm mmhhmmhm mmf. Mmmfff mmmm! MMhhh mmmff mmf mm mm MMMF! Mmmhm mmhhmmhm mmf.
awww don't be like that you got me with some awesome cat and mouse mind games remember
*cuddles*
Yes there is! Aye!
Good times
yadda yadda
heavy fortress < spy fortress.
I will never forget the day you disgraced my family name
http://www.jdbucksavage.com/photos/buck_thumbs_up.jpg
OH JESUS WHYY!!