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So, I've been coming to realize lately that my sense of humor, while witty is getting to be a negative trait. At least in some respects. I'll explain.
I'm someone who has a kind of wit/saracasm kind of thing going on. I'll make comments, reacting to situations or off of what others say. The problem is, I seem to take it too far, too often. It passes over into asshole-ness. The other part of it is people can't tell if I'm being serious or not quite often. I'm a little too good at being sarcastic sometimes I guess.
An example, with my recent now ex girlfriend, my sense of humor actually became an issue. Partly because she was an insecure person, but also because I would go to far and it would seem like I was being harsh or serious with her. She often didn't know if I was being serious and actually formed beliefs about me based on sarcastic remarks I'd make about myself/other stuff. She mentioned it even when we almost broke up early on.
This also happens with friends. Days ago I was with a couple of friends and I was being silly, and my friend actually ended up saying 'you're just irritating me now'.
I don't harp on things when I'm doing this. It's just the transition to lightheartedness to confusing people with my sarcasm or making the wrong kind of joke happens to quickly change. I was at a party and I said something and a friend said 'don't even joke about that'.
I sort of use acting as part of my sense of humor, I'll l pretend I'm someone I wouldn't ever be and then act them out I guess. Or say what I think they would say in a given situation.
I know I don't want to be like this. I don't even really like my sense of hunor myself. There's certain small parts I like but not a lot. I know me doing this kind of stuff comes a lot from my insecurities and using it to cover them up. I don't liek it because I know it's not the real me(or whatever) that is coming out, it's a facade. It's uncomfortable for me too.
Anything I can do to curtail this? It's actually interfering with good relationships. I like self improvement, I'm just not really sure what to do.
"...these long walls have narrowed so quickly that I am in the last chamber already, and there in the corner stands the trap that I must run into"