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Move Over Snuggie- Its the Wearable Towel!

1356

Posts

  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I'll take being a small guy over not being able to wipe my ass.

    ChicoBlue on
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2009
    dear god, that's amazing

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • TiBTiB Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    what happens if you get the stick dirty? Would the type to use one of these take the time to clean it? Or would their guests come over only to find a shit covered stick next to the toilet?

    TiB on
    SatW.jpg
  • moocowmoocow Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    There's also a ComfortWipe Cleaner, to clean your ComfortWipe. It's basically just another ComfortWipe, but smaller. It costs $9.99, unless you order now, then it comes with the ComfortWipe.

    moocow on
    imttnk.png
    PS4:MrZoompants
  • Drew-BDrew-B Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    First new technology for TP since the fucking 1880's!

    Seriously though, I have a thing of Wet Ones on top of my toilet. Anyone else? Hm?

    Drew-B on
  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I don't wipe.

    I'm a man of God.

    ChicoBlue on
  • StaxeonStaxeon Buffalo, NYRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Drew-B wrote: »
    First new technology for TP since the fucking 1880's!

    Seriously though, I have a thing of Wet Ones on top of my toilet. Anyone else? Hm?

    I don't, but should. I remember using a baby wipe once on myself...it was amazing.

    Staxeon on
    Invisible nap is the best nap of all time!
    No man should have that kind of power.
    (Twitter)
  • Drew-BDrew-B Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    People often react oddly to the fact that I use wet wipes, but it's like...dude, if you have shit smeared on your body, why would you wipe it of with some dry paper? If I had shit on my arm, I wouldn't wipe it off with a paper towel. I know an ass is an ass, and not an arm, but I'll use wet wipes thank you.

    Drew-B on
  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    when I move into a place I can renovate the first thing that is going in is a bidet

    Mysst on
    ikbUJdU.jpg
  • TiBTiB Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Drew-B wrote: »
    Seriously though, I have a thing of Wet Ones on top of my toilet. Anyone else? Hm?

    yes:^:

    TiB on
    SatW.jpg
  • FaricazyFaricazy Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    if i wiped my ass with Wet Ones, i'd go broke quick

    Faricazy on
  • Drew-BDrew-B Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Nah, you can wipe normally...think of the wet one as an after dinner MINT.

    Drew-B on
  • StaxeonStaxeon Buffalo, NYRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Faricazy wrote: »
    if i wiped my ass with Wet Ones, i'd go broke quick

    Why, are you a frequent shitter or an avid wiper?

    Or both?

    Staxeon on
    Invisible nap is the best nap of all time!
    No man should have that kind of power.
    (Twitter)
  • FaricazyFaricazy Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Staxeon wrote: »
    Faricazy wrote: »
    if i wiped my ass with Wet Ones, i'd go broke quick

    Why, are you a frequent shitter or an avid wiper?

    Or both?

    more like, a volume shitter, but yes also an avid wiper

    although, is there anything more beautiful in life than a perfectly pinched log that damn near nullifies the need to wipe?

    Faricazy on
  • Drew-BDrew-B Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    You speak of the immaculate shit.

    Drew-B on
  • StaxeonStaxeon Buffalo, NYRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Faricazy wrote: »
    Staxeon wrote: »
    Faricazy wrote: »
    if i wiped my ass with Wet Ones, i'd go broke quick

    Why, are you a frequent shitter or an avid wiper?

    Or both?

    more like, a volume shitter, but yes also an avid wiper

    although, is there anything more beautiful in life than a perfectly pinched log that damn near nullifies the need to wipe?

    Ah, the ghost shit. My youngest son (age 5) somehow is a master of this. Nearly every time he goes, I'm talking 9 out of 10 times, when he wipes the paper is clean. I don't know how he does it but I'm always in awe.

    Staxeon on
    Invisible nap is the best nap of all time!
    No man should have that kind of power.
    (Twitter)
  • Drew-BDrew-B Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    If there were a certain food which I knew to facilitate that sort of thing, I would definitely stock up.

    Drew-B on
  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I love the sound those dukes make when they hit the water

    a real kaTONK

    #pipe on
  • FaricazyFaricazy Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    next time it happens, i am chronicling in a notebook the feasts of the previous day

    Faricazy on
  • Macro9Macro9 Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Shit stories are the equivalent of SE++ shop talk.

    Macro9 on
    58pwo4vxupcr.png
  • FaricazyFaricazy Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    my friend once clogged his toilet with one long, coiling log

    Faricazy on
  • Macro9Macro9 Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    My uncle clogged his toilet with a turd that was flat according to my cousin.

    Macro9 on
    58pwo4vxupcr.png
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] regular
    edited June 2009
    The user and all related content has been deleted.

    [Deleted User] on
  • Macro9Macro9 Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    We also rip skinny vegans in half with our awesome meat fueled muscles.

    Macro9 on
    58pwo4vxupcr.png
  • FaricazyFaricazy Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    lol meat eaters and actually clogging up the toilet with just shit

    jesus christ

    lol herbivores barely utilizing their bodily functions

    Faricazy on
  • StaxeonStaxeon Buffalo, NYRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Yup, cuz that's all we consume. Meat meat meat and more meat. No semblance of fruit or veggies anywhere. Just massive protein-fueled turds.

    Staxeon on
    Invisible nap is the best nap of all time!
    No man should have that kind of power.
    (Twitter)
  • Macro9Macro9 Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    We will build time machines just so we can travel back. I can't wait to eat some mammoth and stegosaurus meat.

    Macro9 on
    58pwo4vxupcr.png
  • StaxeonStaxeon Buffalo, NYRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I want that Fred Flintstone scenario. Just some massive cut of meat on a plate. Bronto burger, mammoth steak, etc.

    Staxeon on
    Invisible nap is the best nap of all time!
    No man should have that kind of power.
    (Twitter)
  • FaricazyFaricazy Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    If they manage to clone that frozen mammoth DNA, we could be looking at mammoth steak within our lifetimes.

    Faricazy on
  • Drew-BDrew-B Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I found a series of photos where some people spot a delivery truck with a stock photo of some office workers gathering around a computer screen on its side. A guy goes up and takes the dimensions of the screen in the stock photo. They print out some hardcore porn screen cap, and apply it to the side of the truck. The result is great.

    Anyway, I was about to post it, but I realized it has some minor nudity (a photo of a photo of nudity, that is), but I thought you guys might appreciate the description.

    Drew-B on
  • StaxeonStaxeon Buffalo, NYRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I love how the prospect of revitalizing an extinct species brings up "how will it taste!?!" conversations.

    It also makes my mouth water and gives me the urge to kick hippies.

    Staxeon on
    Invisible nap is the best nap of all time!
    No man should have that kind of power.
    (Twitter)
  • FaricazyFaricazy Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    I wonder if hippo tastes good.

    They better be worth the absolute bitch of a hassle it takes to take one out.

    Faricazy on
  • EvanderEvander Disappointed Father Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Are towels really that difficult?

    yes

    Evander on
  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Drew-B wrote: »
    I found a series of photos where some people spot a delivery truck with a stock photo of some office workers gathering around a computer screen on its side. A guy goes up and takes the dimensions of the screen in the stock photo. They print out some hardcore porn screen cap, and apply it to the side of the truck. The result is great.

    Anyway, I was about to post it, but I realized it has some minor nudity (a photo of a photo of nudity, that is), but I thought you guys might appreciate the description.

    you should PM me a link and I'll photoshop out the naughty parts and post it

    #pipe on
  • Drew-BDrew-B Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    This gets the point across. Pretty clever.
    asskpy.jpg

    Drew-B on
  • StaxeonStaxeon Buffalo, NYRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Evander wrote: »
    Are towels really that difficult?

    yes

    True story, I had a college roommate freshman year that couldn't master the tuck. Inevietably his towel would fall daily. 4-person room, we other 3 couldn't understand it, or how someone who can't tuck a fucking towel got into college.

    Staxeon on
    Invisible nap is the best nap of all time!
    No man should have that kind of power.
    (Twitter)
  • EvanderEvander Disappointed Father Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Staxeon wrote: »
    Evander wrote: »
    Are towels really that difficult?

    yes

    True story, I had a college roommate freshman year that couldn't master the tuck. Inevietably his towel would fall daily. 4-person room, we other 3 couldn't understand it, or how someone who can't tuck a fucking towel got into college.

    I couldn't tuck a towel very well

    so I got a robe

    Evander on
  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    ha ha ha ha Drew that is excellent

    #pipe on
  • FaricazyFaricazy Registered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Staxeon wrote: »
    Evander wrote: »
    Are towels really that difficult?

    yes

    True story, I had a college roommate freshman year that couldn't master the tuck. Inevietably his towel would fall daily. 4-person room, we other 3 couldn't understand it, or how someone who can't tuck a fucking towel got into college.
    did you spend all day wearing only towels?

    Faricazy on
  • StaxeonStaxeon Buffalo, NYRegistered User regular
    edited June 2009
    Faricazy wrote: »
    Staxeon wrote: »
    Evander wrote: »
    Are towels really that difficult?

    yes

    True story, I had a college roommate freshman year that couldn't master the tuck. Inevietably his towel would fall daily. 4-person room, we other 3 couldn't understand it, or how someone who can't tuck a fucking towel got into college.
    did you spend all day wearing only towels?

    No, he couldn't even make it from the shower down the hall into our dorm room to get dressed. His hands were always full with his shower caddy, and the towel would either fall off in the hall or in the room.

    Staxeon on
    Invisible nap is the best nap of all time!
    No man should have that kind of power.
    (Twitter)
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