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[Movies]: All Australia jokes, all the time

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  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    Brainiac 8 wrote: »
    I have been trying to imagine what a Marvel helmed Spider-Man movie will be like, and for the life of me I just can't.

    I honestly think they should retroactively make the Raimi movies canon and make Parker a legacy hero that has been working in the background. Then introduce Miles and have Parker act as his mentor.

    That way we get the best of both worlds, Parker and Miles in one movie. Then we can get McGuire in one more movie. (Shut up, I actually enjoyed Toby)

    You do know that the Donald Westlake/Darwin Cooke Parker books are not about Spider-Man, right?

  • Brainiac 8Brainiac 8 Don't call me Shirley... Registered User regular
    Atomika wrote: »
    Brainiac 8 wrote: »
    I have been trying to imagine what a Marvel helmed Spider-Man movie will be like, and for the life of me I just can't.

    I honestly think they should retroactively make the Raimi movies canon and make Parker a legacy hero that has been working in the background. Then introduce Miles and have Parker act as his mentor.

    That way we get the best of both worlds, Parker and Miles in one movie. Then we can get McGuire in one more movie. (Shut up, I actually enjoyed Toby)

    You do know that the Donald Westlake/Darwin Cooke Parker books are not about Spider-Man, right?

    Yea, I know, it just got me thinking...and then I realized that I jotted my musings down in a thread that doesn't really care.

    So it was me not paying attention all over the place. :P

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  • HounHoun Registered User regular
    Wash wrote: »
    Houn wrote: »
    I'll still ride for Donnie Darko. It's definitely self-important and figuring out the details of the needlessly convoluted plot requires a walkthrough, but it's also got great atmosphere, good performances, a killer soundtrack, and lots of funny moments. Someone mentioned John Hughes and it does have a bit of a demented Hughes vibe, all that 80s pop music and teenage high school drama, just with a transdimensional wormhole dropped in the middle. It's not successful in everything it tries to do, but it's a genuinely original and weird idea.

    I still love this scene, and how much information it manages to convey without being able to hear a single spoken word. Scene of the film for me.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qsyfGwlf_l0

    Plus, I mean, Patrick Swayze is amazing in it. Also, Gyllenhall absolutely nails "teenager who thinks he's smarter than he actually is."

    Originally, and for most of development, the guy attached to play Donnie was Jason Schwartzman. Can you imagine that movie?

    No. Actually, no, I can't conceive of it. Unless I re-imagine the whole movie as a Wes Anderson affair.

  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Taramoor wrote: »
    Archangle wrote: »
    My favourite heist movies that I haven't seen mentioned:
    Formula 51
    Snatch
    Lock, Stock, & 2 Smoking Barrels
    Eh... In the case of Snatch the heist that kicks off the chain of events is finished by the opening credits, and nominal protagonists Turkish and Tommy aren't even aware that either the diamond heist or the resultant bookie heist have taken place.

    I've always felt the Bookie heist in Snatch to be one of the funniest sequences ever put to film, but I'm weird like that.

    I just love the exchange with the lady.

    "I'm not buying that."

    "I'm not fucking selling that, its a fact."

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • HounHoun Registered User regular
    cptrugged wrote: »
    I still think that the 2nd Raimi Spiderman movie was one of the best superhero movies put to film.

    I wouldn't go that far... but I do think that Doc Oc had one of the best supervillain character arcs put to film, which made it a pretty damn good film and my favorite of the three.

    Also, that hospital scene still makes me giggle.

  • Atlas in ChainsAtlas in Chains Registered User regular
    How did the guy responsible for the character of Ash and all that went along with him in Army of Darkness create a Spider-Man so devoid of humor? There is a lot to like about Raimi's versions, but the title character isn't one of them. And there is a lot to hate about Webb's vision of Spider-Man, but in costume banter isn't one of them. I'd suggest mashing the 2 directors up to get a great Spider-Man movie, but you'd still be left with shitty antagonists with some of the worst design ever.

  • MalReynoldsMalReynolds The Hunter S Thompson of incredibly mild medicines Registered User regular
    How did the guy responsible for the character of Ash and all that went along with him in Army of Darkness create a Spider-Man so devoid of humor? There is a lot to like about Raimi's versions, but the title character isn't one of them. And there is a lot to hate about Webb's vision of Spider-Man, but in costume banter isn't one of them. I'd suggest mashing the 2 directors up to get a great Spider-Man movie, but you'd still be left with shitty antagonists with some of the worst design ever.

    I largely blame Toby McGuire for this; he's way, way, way too earnest to be Spiderman, especially as written. I honestly don't think he could've aced the snark required. I liked the movies, but hearing Toby trash talk would have taken me out of it.

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  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    How did the guy responsible for the character of Ash and all that went along with him in Army of Darkness create a Spider-Man so devoid of humor? There is a lot to like about Raimi's versions, but the title character isn't one of them. And there is a lot to hate about Webb's vision of Spider-Man, but in costume banter isn't one of them. I'd suggest mashing the 2 directors up to get a great Spider-Man movie, but you'd still be left with shitty antagonists with some of the worst design ever.

    How did the guy that made Evil Dead, Drag Me to Hell, and Spider-Man 2 make Oz, The Great and Powerful?

  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    How did he make For the Love of the Game? Raimi takes pay check movies obviously. I still think my favorite movie of his is Quick and the Dead.

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • jungleroomxjungleroomx It's never too many graves, it's always not enough shovels Registered User regular
    If we have the Raimi Spiderman I hope he doesn't cry when things start going crazy.

    Womp womp womp!

  • Page-Page- Registered User regular
    edited March 2015
    Raimi Spider-Man best (film) Spider-Man.

    I really don't think Spider-Man snark translates well to film, and I'm glad he left it out.

    I mean, there was humour and wit all over the rest of those movies, and aside from it not being the Spider-Man many fans seemed to want, they are the most comic-booky (in that they capture a specific, idealized era) of all the comic book movies.

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  • BobbleBobble Registered User regular
    Preacher wrote: »
    How did he make For the Love of the Game?

    Tangent: If you only watch the parts of it pertaining to baseball, that's a really good baseball movie.

  • darleysamdarleysam On my way to UKRegistered User regular
    How did the guy responsible for the character of Ash and all that went along with him in Army of Darkness create a Spider-Man so devoid of humor? There is a lot to like about Raimi's versions, but the title character isn't one of them. And there is a lot to hate about Webb's vision of Spider-Man, but in costume banter isn't one of them. I'd suggest mashing the 2 directors up to get a great Spider-Man movie, but you'd still be left with shitty antagonists with some of the worst design ever.

    I largely blame Toby McGuire for this; he's way, way, way too earnest to be Spiderman, especially as written. I honestly don't think he could've aced the snark required. I liked the movies, but hearing Toby trash talk would have taken me out of it.

    I have to imagine this is an unpopular opinion, but this is where I'm sad that Andrew Garfield won't get a longer run at Spider-Man, because I actually quite liked him in the role.

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  • ElJeffeElJeffe Roaming the streets, waving his mod gun around.Moderator, ClubPA Mod Emeritus
    Barring Jamie Foxx as Electro, I really liked the casting in the Webb films. Those movies failed pretty much entirely in the script. All the other pieces were in place.

    It just turns out that, you know, the story and every piece of dialogue comprise a somewhat important part of a film.

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  • Brainiac 8Brainiac 8 Don't call me Shirley... Registered User regular
    I actually liked Garfield in the role too. I also thought that Spidey's personality was done wonderfully.

    But like @ElJeffe said, the plot of the movies was all over the place in quality and most of it was bad. And dear lord the villains were terrible in both movies. So so soooo bad.

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  • TransporterTransporter Registered User regular
    God I keep forgetting about Drag me to hell. I need to watch that again ASAP.

  • Johnny ChopsockyJohnny Chopsocky Scootaloo! We have to cook! Grillin' HaysenburgersRegistered User regular
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Barring Jamie Foxx as Electro, I really liked the casting in the Webb films. Those movies failed pretty much entirely in the script. All the other pieces were in place.

    It just turns out that, you know, the story and every piece of dialogue comprise a somewhat important part of a film.

    Ugh, that was such a waste. Foxx should've been the new J Jonah Jameson.

    Yeah, the script was hot garbage for both ASMA movies. Both of them are about Magic Blood? REALLY?!

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  • TexiKenTexiKen Dammit! That fish really got me!Registered User regular
    Fast & the Furious movies have mostly bad-to-terrible acting, bad stories and scripts, yet are somehow able to be entertaining and not a train wreck.

    Is this the Nos factor?

  • JoshmviiJoshmvii Registered User regular
    Fast & Furious movies work because they embrace the cheese. When a dude in a movie just straight faced says "I live my life a quarter mile at a time" you have no choice but to just enjoy yourself.

  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    TexiKen wrote: »
    Fast & the Furious movies have mostly bad-to-terrible acting, bad stories and scripts, yet are somehow able to be entertaining and not a train wreck.

    Is this the Nos factor?

    It's tailor-made for mass appeal.

    Charismatic recognizable actors, visceral action, low concept, good guys win.

  • ThirithThirith Registered User regular
    I never thought that Tobey Maguire's Spidey was dour, as some seem to see him here, but then I never read any of the comics. I remember him being fairly internalised but still having a self-deprecating sense of humour.

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  • TransporterTransporter Registered User regular
    Tobey's Peter Parker was a completly acceptable interpretation.

    Tobey's/Rami's Spider-Man was legit terrible and literally left out half of Peter's characterization from the comics.

    It dosen't hurt the quality of the movies, but it is a massive gaping void whenever he suits up and instead relies on the villian to set the tone.

  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    Again, duders, the Marvel thread. Use it. Love it. Embrace it. Touch its leathery erogenous zones.

  • ElJeffeElJeffe Roaming the streets, waving his mod gun around.Moderator, ClubPA Mod Emeritus
    The MCU thread is for the MCU. Non - MCU films can be discussed in here. Spidey is kind of a fringe case now, but to the extent this thread doesn't descend into three page tangents on Spider-Man every two days, i see no problem with taking about it here.

    If you want to talk Spidey's role in upcoming films, that's MCU.

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  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    Lord help me, I kinda want to see the new Mission: Impossible.

    I've seen all of them and found them to be a profound mixture of inane plots and terribly charismatic people performing insane stunts.

  • So It GoesSo It Goes We keep moving...Registered User regular
    I can't keep up with the MCU thread, and I don't want to see some of the spoiler stuff in there about upcoming things

    I'd advocate for discussion of Marvel movies in here when talking criticism of movies that have come out. It's when you start getting into the entire universe and how do they fit together and which hero are they doing next that I think it should go in MCU thread.

    Just my two cents

  • TexiKenTexiKen Dammit! That fish really got me!Registered User regular
    MI 1: good, slow burn with nice camerawork and really long shots. And I always feel sad for Emelio

    MI 2: this must have been one of Australia's first "film here for half off" tax credit movies, because it all made no sense and felt like a way to do the least yet get the most. And Woo's action stuff did not translate well for an American movie, that last act in the bunker and the chase afterwords looks so cheap. That rock climbing scene in the beginning was absolutely cool though.

    MI 3: trying way too hard and has no rewatchability, Abrams does shots that make no sense (like Cruise running and the constant shot that was filmed on a line, it makes no sense because it's not like he's turning into The Flash), and there's no twist with Fishburne at all or the story in general, no matter how they tried to make it seem like that.

    MI 4: The best one, just a very good action movie all the way around, and it has little touches like Cruise breaking out of prison and asking the camera to help him, or when he wakes up in the hospital the translation doesn't read right because he's trying to get his bearings. Just fun.

  • DiannaoChongDiannaoChong Registered User regular
    edited March 2015
    God I keep forgetting about Drag me to hell. I need to watch that again ASAP.

    I watched the... extended cut or something to that nature where extra footage was added back in. It was terrible. Watch the theatrical and never look back. I almost wonder if they made gag reel takes of scenes, and put those in. The actors were doing lines so badly you would think its either a joke or they wanted that shot removed from the film.

    One of the highlights of the film has to be the apple gag with justin long soon after he stopped doing the apple commercials.
    an apple product is in every scene with justin long, as if raimi is mocking him, eventually leading to a scene where the iphone in the scene is bigger than him. It's almost like a B plot extra horror story, he can never escape

    DiannaoChong on
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  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Cruise is just a charismatic dude so watching the next MI is a no brainer, and Mcquarrie did a good job directing him in Jack reacher so I'm on board with his MI. And hey they brought back Ving Rhames!

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    It also has the right amount of Simon Pegg. Like he's the garlic of movies. Too much and its all you can see in the movie, too little and you wonder why he's even there in the first place. MI4 was peak pegg.

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    TexiKen wrote: »
    MI 1: good, slow burn with nice camerawork and really long shots. And I always feel sad for Emelio

    MI 2: this must have been one of Australia's first "film here for half off" tax credit movies, because it all made no sense and felt like a way to do the least yet get the most. And Woo's action stuff did not translate well for an American movie, that last act in the bunker and the chase afterwords looks so cheap. That rock climbing scene in the beginning was absolutely cool though.

    MI 3: trying way too hard and has no rewatchability, Abrams does shots that make no sense (like Cruise running and the constant shot that was filmed on a line, it makes no sense because it's not like he's turning into The Flash), and there's no twist with Fishburne at all or the story in general, no matter how they tried to make it seem like that.

    MI 4: The best one, just a very good action movie all the way around, and it has little touches like Cruise breaking out of prison and asking the camera to help him, or when he wakes up in the hospital the translation doesn't read right because he's trying to get his bearings. Just fun.

    Yep, this checks out.

    Michelle Monahan got a raw deal in MI4.

  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    I still couldn't tell you who the villain of MI4 was.

  • DracomicronDracomicron Registered User regular
    Atomika wrote: »
    I still couldn't tell you who the villain of MI4 was.

    Gravity.

  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Which oddly enough was also the hero in the final Brosnan Bond movie...

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • DoodmannDoodmann Registered User regular
    Houn wrote: »
    cptrugged wrote: »
    I still think that the 2nd Raimi Spiderman movie was one of the best superhero movies put to film.

    I wouldn't go that far... but I do think that Doc Oc had one of the best supervillain character arcs put to film, which made it a pretty damn good film and my favorite of the three.

    Also, that hospital scene still makes me giggle.

    Movies do not get more Sam Rami than that scene. I love it.

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  • DoodmannDoodmann Registered User regular
    Preacher wrote: »
    How did he make For the Love of the Game? Raimi takes pay check movies obviously. I still think my favorite movie of his is Quick and the Dead.

    A this point I will unironically pitch people on that movie. I fucking love it.

    Whippy wrote: »
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  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Which one For the Love of the Game or Quick and the Dead? Quick and the Dead has some fantastic actors and Sharon Stone...

    I mean a movie that has Leonardo Decaprio, Keith David, Gene Hackman, Russel Crowe, and Lance Henricksen hamming it up as gun fighters!? COME ON!

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • DoodmannDoodmann Registered User regular
    Preacher wrote: »
    Which one For the Love of the Game or Quick and the Dead? Quick and the Dead has some fantastic actors and Sharon Stone...

    I mean a movie that has Leonardo Decaprio, Keith David, Gene Hackman, Russel Crowe, and Lance Henricksen hamming it up as gun fighters!? COME ON!

    Exactly! Plus that sweet sweet Rami dolly zoom.

    Whippy wrote: »
    nope nope nope nope abort abort talk about anime
    I like to ART
  • BlackDragon480BlackDragon480 Bluster Kerfuffle Master of Windy ImportRegistered User regular
    Preacher wrote: »

    I mean a movie that has Leonardo Decaprio, Keith David, Gene Hackman, Russel Crowe, and Lance Henricksen hamming it up as gun fighters!? COME ON!

    I love the fight between Hackman and Henricksen in that.

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  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Yeah his directing style is perfect for a movie built around showdowns.

    But really to me the highpoint is Gene Hackman being an utter asshole the whole movie. I mean his role in Unforgiven is good, but its a nuanced villain. Herod in Quick and The Dead is an unrepentant asshole who murders people for the sure fun of it including his own son.

    I mean its a movie that treads on several cliches (secret bad ass murderer preacher, secret bad ass gun fighter with a secret grudge, Keith David), but it relish's those cliches and just lives in them. Everyone is a larger than life sports super star of a gun fighter and the fights themselves are all quick brutal affairs.

    Its one of my favorite modern westerns.

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
This discussion has been closed.