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Choose Your Own [Conspiracy Theories]

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    The EnderThe Ender Registered User regular
    It was such a sad day when the Screw Loose Change doc went down. You can't find a good version of it anywhere anymore. :|

    With Love and Courage
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    HevachHevach Registered User regular
    is enochian an actual language

    i thought it was just a cipher for english

    It's less than that, really, it's just two sets of irreconcilable random nonsense clearly created by an english speaker with no knowledge of other languages (especially the ones supposedly based directly on Enochian). However, it is central to a really weird branch of magic which was actually considered acceptable by many Christian clergy even while they were doing elaborately horrible things to anyone playing around with any other form of magic, which still makes it part of a mythology interesting enough to make a video game about, and obscure enough that you can be sure Final Fantasy hasn't already stolen all the good names out from under you.

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    Caulk Bite 6Caulk Bite 6 One of the multitude of Dans infesting this place Registered User regular
    The Ender wrote: »
    It was such a sad day when the Screw Loose Change doc went down. You can't find a good version of it anywhere anymore. :|

    so, this isn't that?

    jnij103vqi2i.png
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    The EnderThe Ender Registered User regular
    The Ender wrote: »
    It was such a sad day when the Screw Loose Change doc went down. You can't find a good version of it anywhere anymore. :|

    so, this isn't that?

    No, that's just the blog. There was like a 2 hour long debunking video that literally looked at every claim made by Loose Change and just tore it all apart in satisfying fashion.

    With Love and Courage
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    Caulk Bite 6Caulk Bite 6 One of the multitude of Dans infesting this place Registered User regular
    oh you meant documentary.

    jnij103vqi2i.png
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    RchanenRchanen Registered User regular
    Here's something that might start a few conspiracy theories.

    The death of the head of the Taliban.
    Reports of Mansour's travels to Iran have raised eyebrows in many quarters, given that Iranians, who are mostly Shia Muslims, are considered infidels by the Sunni Taliban. Iran denies Mansour ever travelled to the country.

    There has been speculation the Iranians wanted to back Taliban efforts to keep the more hard-line Islamic State out of Afghanistan.

    Others suspect that attempts to establish a Taliban-Iran connection may be to do with rising tensions between the Pakistani military and Iran.
    Much of Dawn's timeline of Mansour's - or Mohammad's - travels appears to have been gleaned from the passport that survived the deadly missile strike which turned his car into a lump of twisted metal.
    Strangely, the passport, and his Pakistani computerised ID, survived in impeccable condition - supposedly thrown clear somehow in the blast.
    There were no reports of anything else surviving in this fashion.

    The pictures of the passport and the Pakistani ID were first circulated on the WhatsApp account of a law enforcement agency based in Balochistan.
    This raised suspicions that it may be an attempt by the Pakistani security establishment to sow confusion.
    Many noted that both documents bore no marks of the deadly attack.
    Some even pointed out that these documents appeared to have been placed on a table to be photographed, which was unlikely given the claim that the pictures were taken at the site of the attack.
    The two documents provide permanent and current addresses of the holder.
    A search of a computerised database showed him to be a voter in the Qilla Abdullah area but a Geo TV reporter could find no one who knew him or the more than half a dozen children he had registered as his family.
    There was more evidence of the mystery man's presence in Karachi, even though the address he provided to the national data registration authority (Nadra) was incomplete.
    Other reporters who spoke to neighbours said that the owner used to come to the apartment building more frequently until 2010.
    After that his visits became fewer. They said he looked and dressed like an Afghan, and often came in an SUV, accompanied by a security detail of armed men who looked like Afghans.
    Many observers are of the view that, given the verification procedures of Nadra, a national ID with faulty or fake addresses could only be issued with official collusion.
    When asked if Nadra was conducting an investigation to verify the identity of Wali Mohammad, a Nadra official advised the BBC to "contact the interior ministry, because it is a sensitive matter".
    There is further confusion on whether the body is still in the hospital.
    One body, that of a man named Azam who was believed to be the driver of the car, was immediately claimed by his relatives. The other lay there unclaimed.
    On Sunday evening, a hospital official told reporters in Quetta that someone who introduced himself as Mohammad Rafiq had rung up to say he was Wali Mohammad's nephew and would like to claim his body. But later he failed to show up at the hospital.
    On Monday evening, the home minister of Balochistan province told the BBC the body was still at the hospital.
    But on Tuesday morning a BBC reporter in Quetta was shown hospital records according to which the dead body of Wali Mohammad had been handed over to Mr Rafiq on Sunday.
    The reporter was also shown a handwritten receipt signed by Mr Rafiq.
    Below his signature, Mr Rafiq also provided his cell phone number, which is eight digits - one digit too long for Pakistan.
    Calls made using various combinations of the number have been fruitless so far.

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    Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    i70lrz8e7el1.jpg

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    Raiden333Raiden333 Registered User regular
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLE-ocDoXrs

    These people are a nonstop source of entertainment.

    There was a steam sig here. It's gone now.
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    ShadowfireShadowfire Vermont, in the middle of nowhereRegistered User regular
    edited May 2016
    "Ball Earth Garbage."
    :lol:

    Edit: What the fuck was that last half? It felt like some sort of YouTube acid trip.

    Shadowfire on
    WiiU: Windrunner ; Guild Wars 2: Shadowfire.3940 ; PSN: Bradcopter
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    The EnderThe Ender Registered User regular
    Shadowfire wrote: »
    "Ball Earth Garbage."
    :lol:

    Edit: What the fuck was that last half? It felt like some sort of YouTube acid trip.

    I believe that's what the kids these days refer to as a 'YouTube Poop'.

    With Love and Courage
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    Caulk Bite 6Caulk Bite 6 One of the multitude of Dans infesting this place Registered User regular
    Found an SCP about that Lizard People meme

    jnij103vqi2i.png
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    UreshiiAkumaUreshiiAkuma Registered User regular
    According to a friend, Prince did not die of an OD (nor did he fake his death to become a spy as was reported earlier in this thread.) No, he was going to go public about the Illuminati (or something), so they had him assassinated.
    The proof: he was apparently assassinated in a Simpsons episode.
    I guess the Illuminati run the Simpsons or something? And use it to give hints of their plans for world domination?

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    SticksSticks I'd rather be in bed.Registered User regular
    Nothing is coincidence. Everything is planned.

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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    is your friend taking the piss

    or is he one of those dudes who started being a conspiracy theorist ironically and then it became his gimmick and nobody knows anymore

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    Harry DresdenHarry Dresden Registered User regular
    Rchanen wrote: »
    Here's something that might start a few conspiracy theories.

    The death of the head of the Taliban.
    Reports of Mansour's travels to Iran have raised eyebrows in many quarters, given that Iranians, who are mostly Shia Muslims, are considered infidels by the Sunni Taliban. Iran denies Mansour ever travelled to the country.

    There has been speculation the Iranians wanted to back Taliban efforts to keep the more hard-line Islamic State out of Afghanistan.

    Others suspect that attempts to establish a Taliban-Iran connection may be to do with rising tensions between the Pakistani military and Iran.
    Much of Dawn's timeline of Mansour's - or Mohammad's - travels appears to have been gleaned from the passport that survived the deadly missile strike which turned his car into a lump of twisted metal.
    Strangely, the passport, and his Pakistani computerised ID, survived in impeccable condition - supposedly thrown clear somehow in the blast.
    There were no reports of anything else surviving in this fashion.

    The pictures of the passport and the Pakistani ID were first circulated on the WhatsApp account of a law enforcement agency based in Balochistan.
    This raised suspicions that it may be an attempt by the Pakistani security establishment to sow confusion.
    Many noted that both documents bore no marks of the deadly attack.
    Some even pointed out that these documents appeared to have been placed on a table to be photographed, which was unlikely given the claim that the pictures were taken at the site of the attack.
    The two documents provide permanent and current addresses of the holder.
    A search of a computerised database showed him to be a voter in the Qilla Abdullah area but a Geo TV reporter could find no one who knew him or the more than half a dozen children he had registered as his family.
    There was more evidence of the mystery man's presence in Karachi, even though the address he provided to the national data registration authority (Nadra) was incomplete.
    Other reporters who spoke to neighbours said that the owner used to come to the apartment building more frequently until 2010.
    After that his visits became fewer. They said he looked and dressed like an Afghan, and often came in an SUV, accompanied by a security detail of armed men who looked like Afghans.
    Many observers are of the view that, given the verification procedures of Nadra, a national ID with faulty or fake addresses could only be issued with official collusion.
    When asked if Nadra was conducting an investigation to verify the identity of Wali Mohammad, a Nadra official advised the BBC to "contact the interior ministry, because it is a sensitive matter".
    There is further confusion on whether the body is still in the hospital.
    One body, that of a man named Azam who was believed to be the driver of the car, was immediately claimed by his relatives. The other lay there unclaimed.
    On Sunday evening, a hospital official told reporters in Quetta that someone who introduced himself as Mohammad Rafiq had rung up to say he was Wali Mohammad's nephew and would like to claim his body. But later he failed to show up at the hospital.
    On Monday evening, the home minister of Balochistan province told the BBC the body was still at the hospital.
    But on Tuesday morning a BBC reporter in Quetta was shown hospital records according to which the dead body of Wali Mohammad had been handed over to Mr Rafiq on Sunday.
    The reporter was also shown a handwritten receipt signed by Mr Rafiq.
    Below his signature, Mr Rafiq also provided his cell phone number, which is eight digits - one digit too long for Pakistan.
    Calls made using various combinations of the number have been fruitless so far.

    Cause of death: Remo Williams

    MV5BMTk4MzIyNzQyNF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwNTgwNzk5._V1_SY317_CR4,0,214,317_AL_.jpg

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    UreshiiAkumaUreshiiAkuma Registered User regular
    Pony wrote: »
    is your friend taking the piss

    or is he one of those dudes who started being a conspiracy theorist ironically and then it became his gimmick and nobody knows anymore

    Unfortunately, when it comes to the Illuminati, he's a True Believer. Particularly the celebrity involvement aspect. He's flirted with other conspiracy theories before, but mostly seems to be focused on Illuminati ones.

    Curious, I googled "prince assasinated Illuminati," and sure enough, the first link is claiming a conspiracy, and points to the Simpsons episode as one of the pieces of evidence ...

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    jungleroomxjungleroomx It's never too many graves, it's always not enough shovels Registered User regular
    Rchanen wrote: »
    Here's something that might start a few conspiracy theories.

    The death of the head of the Taliban.
    Reports of Mansour's travels to Iran have raised eyebrows in many quarters, given that Iranians, who are mostly Shia Muslims, are considered infidels by the Sunni Taliban. Iran denies Mansour ever travelled to the country.

    There has been speculation the Iranians wanted to back Taliban efforts to keep the more hard-line Islamic State out of Afghanistan.

    Others suspect that attempts to establish a Taliban-Iran connection may be to do with rising tensions between the Pakistani military and Iran.
    Much of Dawn's timeline of Mansour's - or Mohammad's - travels appears to have been gleaned from the passport that survived the deadly missile strike which turned his car into a lump of twisted metal.
    Strangely, the passport, and his Pakistani computerised ID, survived in impeccable condition - supposedly thrown clear somehow in the blast.
    There were no reports of anything else surviving in this fashion.

    The pictures of the passport and the Pakistani ID were first circulated on the WhatsApp account of a law enforcement agency based in Balochistan.
    This raised suspicions that it may be an attempt by the Pakistani security establishment to sow confusion.
    Many noted that both documents bore no marks of the deadly attack.
    Some even pointed out that these documents appeared to have been placed on a table to be photographed, which was unlikely given the claim that the pictures were taken at the site of the attack.
    The two documents provide permanent and current addresses of the holder.
    A search of a computerised database showed him to be a voter in the Qilla Abdullah area but a Geo TV reporter could find no one who knew him or the more than half a dozen children he had registered as his family.
    There was more evidence of the mystery man's presence in Karachi, even though the address he provided to the national data registration authority (Nadra) was incomplete.
    Other reporters who spoke to neighbours said that the owner used to come to the apartment building more frequently until 2010.
    After that his visits became fewer. They said he looked and dressed like an Afghan, and often came in an SUV, accompanied by a security detail of armed men who looked like Afghans.
    Many observers are of the view that, given the verification procedures of Nadra, a national ID with faulty or fake addresses could only be issued with official collusion.
    When asked if Nadra was conducting an investigation to verify the identity of Wali Mohammad, a Nadra official advised the BBC to "contact the interior ministry, because it is a sensitive matter".
    There is further confusion on whether the body is still in the hospital.
    One body, that of a man named Azam who was believed to be the driver of the car, was immediately claimed by his relatives. The other lay there unclaimed.
    On Sunday evening, a hospital official told reporters in Quetta that someone who introduced himself as Mohammad Rafiq had rung up to say he was Wali Mohammad's nephew and would like to claim his body. But later he failed to show up at the hospital.
    On Monday evening, the home minister of Balochistan province told the BBC the body was still at the hospital.
    But on Tuesday morning a BBC reporter in Quetta was shown hospital records according to which the dead body of Wali Mohammad had been handed over to Mr Rafiq on Sunday.
    The reporter was also shown a handwritten receipt signed by Mr Rafiq.
    Below his signature, Mr Rafiq also provided his cell phone number, which is eight digits - one digit too long for Pakistan.
    Calls made using various combinations of the number have been fruitless so far.

    Cause of death: Remo Williams

    MV5BMTk4MzIyNzQyNF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwNTgwNzk5._V1_SY317_CR4,0,214,317_AL_.jpg

    The most boring martial art ever, right there.

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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    I mean weird celebrity-obsessed conspiracy theories are as old as the concept of celebrity.

    The way celebrities border on religious figures leads to this kind of thing.

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    Harry DresdenHarry Dresden Registered User regular
    Pony wrote: »
    I mean weird celebrity-obsessed conspiracy theories are as old as the concept of celebrity.

    The way celebrities border on religious figures leads to this kind of thing.

    They show up in the comments with every music video ever, too. A musician has a music video? They're in the illuminati.

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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    Pony wrote: »
    I mean weird celebrity-obsessed conspiracy theories are as old as the concept of celebrity.

    The way celebrities border on religious figures leads to this kind of thing.

    They show up in the comments with every music video ever, too. A musician has a music video? They're in the illuminati.

    This is especially common in hiphop, a lot of artists are alternatingly believed to be in or victims of the Illuminati, and not just by the fans. There's many hiphop artists who are conspiracy theorists and believe that the big icons of hiphop (like Jay Z and Kanye) are part of the Illuminati and that they are holding non-members down, and that drama in the hiphop world is Illuminati-related.

    And of course, one of the most famous flat-earthers is hiphop artist BoB, who also believes in the Illuminati.

    Because obsessiveness with masculinity, heteronormativity, and gay panic are also pretty big deals in a lot of hiphop culture (and especially gangsta rap culture), there's a lot of fans and artists who believe in weird gay conspiracies and in a Gay Illuminati and shit like that.

    Dave Chappelle, who has a bunch of weird kinda conspiratorial beliefs (but is himself the center of a weird conspiracy with a black celebrity secret society), thinks there's a Hollywood conspiracy to emasculate black men by putting black male celebrities in drag. A lot of hiphop fans buy into this as part of some weird gay Illuminati conspiracy

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    gavindelgavindel The reason all your software is brokenRegistered User regular
    I opened this thread and the SCOTUS thread at the same time and read them in reverse order. It took surprisingly long to realize my error, wondering to myself "The conspiracy theories today seem oddly plausible"...The tip off was incompetence in government. Conspiracy theories are always hyper competent, able to wrap up every last thread despite having hundreds of active members.

    Book - Royal road - Free! Seraphim === TTRPG - Wuxia - Free! Seln Alora
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    Dark Raven XDark Raven X Laugh hard, run fast, be kindRegistered User regular
    The Simpsons predicted Prince's death by showing Homer kill him in a montage? By that logic, shouldn't everyone else in the montage have died at the same time as Prince?

    Cause if the prediction was that "at some point in the future, Prince will die" then... no shit?

    Oh brilliant
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    Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    Celebrities are immortal. Fame does that.

    I also like that Dave Chappelle has something against drag when he wore a dress in Robin Hood: Men in Tights.

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    Harry DresdenHarry Dresden Registered User regular
    edited June 2016
    The Simpsons predicted Prince's death by showing Homer kill him in a montage? By that logic, shouldn't everyone else in the montage have died at the same time as Prince?

    Cause if the prediction was that "at some point in the future, Prince will die" then... no shit?

    The mistake you're making is using logic.

    Harry Dresden on
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    davidsdurionsdavidsdurions Your Trusty Meatshield Panhandle NebraskaRegistered User regular
    Logic is an illusion that the aliens introduced to human society in order to obscure our view of the truth. Wake up!

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    GaryOGaryO Registered User regular
    Logic is an illusion that the aliens introduced to human society in order to obscure our view of the truth. Wake up!

    In this case the aliens were Vulcans? Those bastards!!

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    MuzzmuzzMuzzmuzz Registered User regular
    So, someone on my local facebook feed had a baby who had a bunch of seizures. Someone out of the blue said it might be caused by the wind turbines we have in the area.

    I said that it was a stupid suggestion, and that there were way more plausible things that could cause it.

    Now I have a bunch of screechy ladies telling me that her theory shouldn't be belittled, and that it might have some merit.


    ......

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    Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    Muzzmuzz wrote: »
    So, someone on my local facebook feed had a baby who had a bunch of seizures. Someone out of the blue said it might be caused by the wind turbines we have in the area.

    I said that it was a stupid suggestion, and that there were way more plausible things that could cause it.

    Now I have a bunch of screechy ladies telling me that her theory shouldn't be belittled, and that it might have some merit.


    ......

    I would ask the question "How would the windmills cause seizures?"

    I just want to see the trainwreak that comes from them playing scientist/doctor in explaining it.

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    DivideByZeroDivideByZero Social Justice Blackguard Registered User regular
    Maybe the baby was epileptic

    And was staring at the sun

    Through the blades of a wind turbine

    Rotating impossibly fast

    Don't belittle my theories!!

    First they came for the Muslims, and we said NOT TODAY, MOTHERFUCKERS
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    ShadowfireShadowfire Vermont, in the middle of nowhereRegistered User regular
    Muzzmuzz wrote: »
    So, someone on my local facebook feed had a baby who had a bunch of seizures. Someone out of the blue said it might be caused by the wind turbines we have in the area.

    I said that it was a stupid suggestion, and that there were way more plausible things that could cause it.

    Now I have a bunch of screechy ladies telling me that her theory shouldn't be belittled, and that it might have some merit.


    ......

    Did the kid fall off the windmill head first?

    WiiU: Windrunner ; Guild Wars 2: Shadowfire.3940 ; PSN: Bradcopter
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    gjaustingjaustin Registered User regular
    Muzzmuzz wrote: »
    So, someone on my local facebook feed had a baby who had a bunch of seizures. Someone out of the blue said it might be caused by the wind turbines we have in the area.

    I said that it was a stupid suggestion, and that there were way more plausible things that could cause it.

    Now I have a bunch of screechy ladies telling me that her theory shouldn't be belittled, and that it might have some merit.


    ......

    I would ask the question "How would the windmills cause seizures?"

    I just want to see the trainwreak that comes from them playing scientist/doctor in explaining it.
    Honestly, that would probably have been the better way to begin with.

    Popping in and calling something stupid rarely works well, even if you're correct.

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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    holy shit this is fascinating

    a case came before the court in Canada involving one of those "Sovereign Citizen" type crazypeople (included in this thread because they are almost always conspiracy theorists as well) and the judge, in his ruling, went fuckin' ham on these idiots:

    http://www.canlii.org/en/ab/abqb/doc/2012/2012abqb571/2012abqb571.html

    It's an incredibly long read (It's a court document, obviously) but contains such wondrous gems as
    OPCA litigants appear to engage in a court drama that is more akin to a magic spell ritual than an actual legal proceeding

    never has this gif been more appropriate:
    SnCcn5m.gif

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    PolaritiePolaritie Sleepy Registered User regular
    Pony wrote: »
    holy shit this is fascinating

    a case came before the court in Canada involving one of those "Sovereign Citizen" type crazypeople (included in this thread because they are almost always conspiracy theorists as well) and the judge, in his ruling, went fuckin' ham on these idiots:

    http://www.canlii.org/en/ab/abqb/doc/2012/2012abqb571/2012abqb571.html

    It's an incredibly long read (It's a court document, obviously) but contains such wondrous gems as
    OPCA litigants appear to engage in a court drama that is more akin to a magic spell ritual than an actual legal proceeding

    never has this gif been more appropriate:
    SnCcn5m.gif

    It's basically a dissertation on that bullshit - I think someone posted it in the aftermath of the wildlife preserve incident earlier this year?

    Steam: Polaritie
    3DS: 0473-8507-2652
    Switch: SW-5185-4991-5118
    PSN: AbEntropy
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    JusticeforPlutoJusticeforPluto Registered User regular
    There was an add for a conspiracy video on Youtube about how the President can overthrow the government. I accidentally clicked on it, and now my recommended feed is full of such gems as:

    THE AWAKENING: Quantum Mechanics of the Human Brain
    END TIMES: WHAT AMERICA SHOULD KNOW ABOUT A WOMAN PRESIDENT (featuring a guy standing in from of an Ark replica)
    10 Reasons why you should NEVER open your Third Eye
    UNLOCKING YOUR MIND FOR MIRICLES

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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    delete the original video from your youtube history, that should cut down on that shit

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    Wraith260Wraith260 Happiest Goomba! Registered User regular
    no, follow that rabbit hole! find the truth JusticeforPluto and don't ever let anyone stop you!

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    WiseManTobesWiseManTobes Registered User regular
    Is the third eye the brown eye?

    Steam! Battlenet:Wisemantobes#1508
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    Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    There was an add for a conspiracy video on Youtube about how the President can overthrow the government. I accidentally clicked on it, and now my recommended feed is full of such gems as:

    THE AWAKENING: Quantum Mechanics of the Human Brain
    END TIMES: WHAT AMERICA SHOULD KNOW ABOUT A WOMAN PRESIDENT (featuring a guy standing in from of an Ark replica)
    10 Reasons why you should NEVER open your Third Eye
    UNLOCKING YOUR MIND FOR MIRICLES

    I had the same thing happen with Feminism. One of the channels I subsribed to did a video about the after effects of Gamergate a year later and I watched it, found it informative, then suddenly I'm bombared by Feminism is stupid videos, true agendas of the man-enslaving feminist, ect. Yeah, delete any of the videos in your history and they should go away.

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    SticksSticks I'd rather be in bed.Registered User regular
    Pony wrote: »
    holy shit this is fascinating

    a case came before the court in Canada involving one of those "Sovereign Citizen" type crazypeople (included in this thread because they are almost always conspiracy theorists as well) and the judge, in his ruling, went fuckin' ham on these idiots:

    http://www.canlii.org/en/ab/abqb/doc/2012/2012abqb571/2012abqb571.html

    It's an incredibly long read (It's a court document, obviously) but contains such wondrous gems as
    OPCA litigants appear to engage in a court drama that is more akin to a magic spell ritual than an actual legal proceeding

    never has this gif been more appropriate:
    SnCcn5m.gif

    This is a fascinating read. Also some surprising tidbits in there:
    Members in the OPCA community appear surprisingly unified by their methodology and objectives. They are otherwise diverse. OPCA litigants appearing in our Court may be anything from educated professionals to retired senior citizens. They may be wealthy or poor. The famous are not immune; for example the American action movie actor Wesley Snipes adopted OPCA techniques in an attempt to defeat his income tax obligations: United State v. Wesley Trent Snipes et al., No. 5:06‑cr‑00022‑WTH‑GRJ‑1 (U.S.D.C. M.D. Fl., February 1, 2008). Snipes presently is serving a three year prison sentence for income tax evasion.

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    ArbitraryDescriptorArbitraryDescriptor changed Registered User regular
    Is the third eye the brown eye?

    Yes. Pooping causes aspergers. Protect your children!

This discussion has been closed.