Help me to speak in groups of people

Ponge

I'm not really a 100% 'shy' guy, I'm really outgoing and chatty when I'm speaking with people in my social circle (or when I've had a few drinks) or especially when it's just me and another person chatting I can generally talk up some decent conversation. But if 2 or 3 other people (who I might not know so well) join the conversation to talk to the other person, I generally find that I just completely clam up and can't think of anything to say.

This is especially true if the other people seem more 'popular' than me (god that sounds so high-school), I mean the more outgoing they are the more I tend to close up.

It's really annoying especially as I've just restarted uni, and I've got a decent group of 10 or so friends in my class of 30 who I can talk to no problem, but the rest of the group I just can't seem to start conversation.

Improvolone

Just fucking force yourself into these situations and force yourself to do something. The more stupid the better. Go to kareoke and make a fucking fool of yourself.
You already know how to talk to someone, its a matter of expanding on the situation to get used to it.

Euphoriac

Listen to what's being said, and try to talk about that. If it's something you do, or otherwise have some kind of experience with; then talk about that experience. If it's something you don't do or don't know of, ask what it is and what it's about.

I used to have similar problems back in college. People would talk about genre's of music i'd never listened to, or games/movies i'd never played/seen and was tempted to clam up. But i decided to inquire about those things. They would then extol the virtues of whatever it was and i'd be included in the conversation from then on.

trentsteel

I have had this problem in the past and these guys are right, just keep forcing yourself into the conversation

BUT

I have another theory. In my experience there are two kinds of "funny and outgoing" people. The ones that let other people have a turn to talk, and the ones that just love being the center of attention. It doesn't matter how hard you try to join in on the conversation of the latter person because they will cut you off mid-story or joke everytime. I have learned to tell the difference and as a result I have a really funny group of friends that let everyone get a chance to speak in the room. This results in much funnier conversations anyway. Other wise you are basically just listening to a one or two-man show.