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Help me grow a beard yo

no entiendono entiendo Registered User new member
edited November 2009 in Help / Advice Forum
So, uh, yeah. Basically I lost a bet and now I have to grow a beard, but my ability to actually grow facial hair has always been limited at best. Short of slapping Rogaine on my face, is there anything I can do to encourage beard growth? I've heard that shaving more often causes facial hair to grow faster, but I've always suspected that might just be an urban myth.

Help me H&A, you're my only hope!

no entiendo on

Posts

  • Phil G.Phil G. __BANNED USERS regular
    edited November 2009
    What colour is your facial hair? If it is blondish/near invisible, dye it when it gets long enough.

    Phil G. on
  • ChanusChanus Harbinger of the Spicy Rooster Apocalypse The Flames of a Thousand Collapsed StarsRegistered User, Moderator mod
    edited November 2009
    Your hair grows at the rate it will grow. Shaving causing it to grow faster is an old wives' tale.

    Best you can do is cut it in to minimize patchiness (like lower on the cheeks if you don't really grow hair there).

    Chanus on
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  • EskimoDaveEskimoDave Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    increase your testosterone levels.

    EskimoDave on
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  • DarkewolfeDarkewolfe Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Wenching, whoring and drinking.

    Darkewolfe on
    What is this I don't even.
  • ScalfinScalfin __BANNED USERS regular
    edited November 2009
    You could stay at stubble length and let the sideburns down.

    Scalfin on
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  • matt has a problemmatt has a problem Points to 'off' Points to 'on'Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    It doesn't make it grow faster, it just makes it appear thicker, as the ends of the hairs are cut blunt, instead of tapering to a point. There's nothing you can do to make it grow faster aside from not cutting it.

    Chopping down trees and participating in demolition derbies wouldn't hurt, though.

    matt has a problem on
    nibXTE7.png
  • SheepSheep Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited November 2009
    Step 1> Do not Shave

    Sheep on
  • CasualCasual Wiggle Wiggle Wiggle Flap Flap Flap Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Sheep wrote: »
    Step 1> Do not Shave

    Step 2> Repeat step 1

    Casual on
  • KivutarKivutar Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Casual wrote: »
    Sheep wrote: »
    Step 1> Do not Shave

    Step 2> Repeat step 1 ad infinitum

    Kivutar on
  • mtsmts Dr. Robot King Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    1. grow the hair on the side of your head really long
    2. mega comb-under

    mts on
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  • UnknownUnknown
    edited November 2009
    This content has been removed.

  • FletcherFletcher Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    if there is one thing the jackass movies taught me

    it is that you should cut off all of your friends' pubic hair and glue it to your face

    victory is assured

    Fletcher on
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  • noobertnoobert Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    mts wrote: »
    1. grow the hair on the side of your head really long
    2. mega comb-under

    haha, oh wow

    noobert on
  • Gabriel_PittGabriel_Pitt Stepped in it Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    The best I can offer is that facial hair, especially if you have light hair to begin with, tends to appear really, really light when it's at the just stubble phase. Once it's grown out enough to actually have some body to it, it should look a lot darker. Of course, if your problem is that you have sparse, wispy whiskers, then there's really not much to be done for it, aside from theater prosthetics.

    Gabriel_Pitt on
  • ImprovoloneImprovolone Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    I've got money on you, weeks from now saying, "holy crap, I've got red in there!"

    Improvolone on
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  • EskimoDaveEskimoDave Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Improvolone wrote: »
    I've got money on you, weeks from now saying, "holy crap, I've got red in there!"

    My hair is brown but I grow a red beard and a blonde mustache.

    EskimoDave on
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  • CorvusCorvus . VancouverRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Improvolone wrote: »
    I've got money on you, weeks from now saying, "holy crap, I've got red in there!"

    I get some of that, with brown hair. Of course, now I'm also going, "grey in my beard? what the hell!"

    Corvus on
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  • ImprovoloneImprovolone Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Ah, so you used to have more red hair then.

    Improvolone on
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  • susansusan Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Exercise can increase your testosterone levels, which will then increase your facial hair production. So, there's that. Start a nice weightlifting routine, combined with eating a lot of quality proteins and fats like avocados and fish, to help hair and muscle growth. Then beat up the people who you lost the bet to.

    susan on
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  • L|amaL|ama Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    EskimoDave wrote: »
    Improvolone wrote: »
    I've got money on you, weeks from now saying, "holy crap, I've got red in there!"

    My hair is brown but I grow a red beard and a blonde mustache.

    you ever shaving is a crime against humanity

    L|ama on
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  • CasualCasual Wiggle Wiggle Wiggle Flap Flap Flap Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Brown hair and Black beard, YARRRRR.

    Oddly enough my facial hair is reasonably thick now but invisible on film. o_O

    Casual on
  • truck-a-saurastruck-a-sauras Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Casual wrote: »
    Brown hair and Black beard, YARRRRR.

    Oddly enough my facial hair is reasonably thick now but invisible on film. o_O

    ghost beard? Vampire beard?

    truck-a-sauras on
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  • DeebaserDeebaser on my way to work in a suit and a tie Ahhhh...come on fucking guyRegistered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Step 1: Wait
    Step 2: ????
    Step 3: Beard

    Deebaser on
  • GothicLargoGothicLargo Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    no entiendo wrote: »
    Help me grow a beard yo

    Don't shave yo.

    GothicLargo on
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  • underdonkunderdonk __BANNED USERS regular
    edited November 2009
    I wish I could report this whole thread as awesome.

    underdonk on
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  • rfaliasrfalias Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Actually, the best way is to spend two hours a day in a completely white room, no noise what so ever.

    Sit, and push the hair out of your face.
    Like you are crapping but out of your hair follicles.

    Take caution though, you may get a hernia.

    rfalias on
  • see317see317 Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    rfalias wrote: »
    Actually, the best way is to spend two hours a day in a completely white room, no noise what so ever.

    Sit, and push the hair out of your face.
    Like you are crapping but out of your hair follicles.

    Take caution though, you may get a hernia.

    top%20hat%20lg.JPG
    It worked for me.

    see317 on
  • the wookthe wook Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    engage in manly pursuits such as wrestling bears

    the wook on
  • Gabriel_PittGabriel_Pitt Stepped in it Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    the wook wrote: »
    engage in manly pursuits such as wrestling bears

    samson-0408.jpg
    ?

    Gabriel_Pitt on
  • YannYann Registered User regular
    edited November 2009
    Not masturbating or having sexual release in other ways (:winky:) for long periods can theoretically increase testosterone levels in not insignificant amounts.

    Yann on
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