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Crazy Boyfriend/Girlfriend Stories: Thats Crazy!
Capt Howdy
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
Figured the first thread was so full of win, we should continue with a second. I'll go first.
Sadly, the ex gf who tried to stab me over eating the last can of beef ravioli wasn't the first attempt on my life by a girl friend. I also had a girl friend in high school try to run me over because she thought I was cheating.
She confronted me in her car because she heard a girl talk about how she wanted to get with me, which naturally meant I was cheating. I let her know I wasn't and informed her she was acting a little crazy. Her response was to slap the sun glasses off my face (causing a 4 inch long cut from my nose to my cheek) and telling me to get out of her car. Naturally I did.
I start to walk off and hear the car engine revving, turn around, and see a nice muscle car aimed at me doing a good 30mph. Luckily there were concrete pillars (quite popular on Air Force Bases) a few feet from me, and I was able to jump over one before she got to me. Naturally, the relationship ended there.
Funny side story, I never cheated on her. Turns out she cheated on me twice.
Now it's your turn D&D. Regale us with your most twisted stories of past, and current, lovers gone awry.
Sadly, the ex gf who tried to stab me over eating the last can of beef ravioli wasn't the first attempt on my life by a girl friend. I also had a girl friend in high school try to run me over because she thought I was cheating.
She confronted me in her car because she heard a girl talk about how she wanted to get with me, which naturally meant I was cheating. I let her know I wasn't and informed her she was acting a little crazy. Her response was to slap the sun glasses off my face (causing a 4 inch long cut from my nose to my cheek) and telling me to get out of her car. Naturally I did.
I start to walk off and hear the car engine revving, turn around, and see a nice muscle car aimed at me doing a good 30mph. Luckily there were concrete pillars (quite popular on Air Force Bases) a few feet from me, and I was able to jump over one before she got to me. Naturally, the relationship ended there.
Funny side story, I never cheated on her. Turns out she cheated on me twice.
Now it's your turn D&D. Regale us with your most twisted stories of past, and current, lovers gone awry.
Steam: kaylesolo1
3DS: 1521-4165-5907
PS3: KayleSolo
Live: Kayle Solo
WiiU: KayleSolo
3DS: 1521-4165-5907
PS3: KayleSolo
Live: Kayle Solo
WiiU: KayleSolo
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My friend, Bob, was dating this chick, Jill. Everything was fine for a while until Jill breaks up with him because she "really needs to focus on school right now". Which is all well and good until she's with another dude about 1 month later. Crazy #1.
Bob gets in touch with her not too long after they break-up and asks for one of his shirts back. It was a shirt that Bob had owned for years and now that he wasn't with the bitch, he wanted it back. Nothing wrong with that. Bob asks Jill if she can simply mail it back to him. To which she responds, "Fine. I'll mail it back. But this is one of the most rude things I've ever been associated with!" Crazy #2.
Bob doesn't really know what to say to that, since ohmygodcrazy, so he says nothing. Shirt arrives later and needless to say, they don't talk anymore.
On a scale of 0 to 10 that's maybe a 2 or a 3
You'll notice that I didn't say the story was going to be epic.
I guess its more my fault for expecting a real jaw dropper and getting something everyday, which is good for you and your friend (and means you can go out and get drunk with him instead of dropping him off at a loony bin)
Things like FUCK YOU FAGGOT and ROT IN HELL BITCH and LYING ASSHOLE and WORTHLESS FUCKING THIEF etc etc. I was alittle confused over some of these (especially the thief comments), but I figured she had just gotten drunk or something and had a friend help her spray my place.
So I'm about to confront my ex-girlfriend about it, fully prepared to break her neck with my hands, when one of the neighbors explains to me that this had happened before a couple of times with the previous tenant, he had ripped this guy off about something, and the guy just showed up every couple of months and spraypainted the shit out of his place.
I guess the guy didn't know that he had moved.
So, it almost became a crazy boyfriend/girlfriend story, except for I would have been the crazy one.
I told pretty much all of my crazy ex stories in the last thread.
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I've seen this all over the forum, but I've never known what it means. What is bluedotting?
So we were texting each other one night, you know, talking dirty, that kind of stuff. Actually we were on MSN now that I think about it. Anyways, we're getting mad rutty, real into it, and I suggest sending her a picture on my phone of my little man! (He wasn't so little at the time cuz, you know. Mad rutty.) So I snap the pic, and sent it to her. Five minutes pass. She hasn't gotten it yet. I look on my phone and it pretty clearly said it was sent to her. Fifteen minutes later, still nothing.
She never, ever received it. Not for the rest of the time we were dating, which was another few months. It never reached her, but it most certainly got sent. So bizarre. Somewhere on the airwaves a picture of my erect member is floating around waiting to reach it's destination.
Its (read the FAQ) when you post an otherwise non-contributory post in order to mark the thread for later viewing. Generally frowned upon.
Making a post so that the thread shows up in your user panel. Thread's you've posted in have a blue dot in an orange circle. Threads with just new posts have just an orange circle. You can also use the subscribe option as well.
It's an analogy of your sex life
How could I not see this? As soon as I start seeing someone else the picture will probably get on their phones.
I thought this was going to end with the pic somehow arriving after you guys broke up. That would have been awkward.
I don't have too much to contribute. The only thing I can think of was when my ex said he wanted to break up, I said ok, then he got mad at me later and said that he didn't actually want to break up and that I was supposed to fight for our relationship. o_O
So instead of Dan of the CDSH story, this one involves Jim, our guild leader (who was also stationed with me in Germany).
So Jim is starting an online romance with one of the girls in our guild, lets call her Kate. So Kate and Jim are getting all cutesy lovey dovey and generally making people take insulin before loggin online, etc. This continues for a couple weeks, but then all of a sudden Kate dissapears - no warning or anything. Just gone. She stays incommunicado for the better part of 2 weeks then shows up again with a bombshell - She wasn't online because she has brain cancer and is going to die. Then she logs off.
Now none of had known Kate to be a story teller so the whole guild is freaking out. We're collecting money for flowers, we're trying to find out what hospital to send her cards, etc. All the while we can't get ahold of Kate on MSN, Phone, whatever. Eventually we see her account log on again and Jim sends a message. The person on the other end gives him a phone number and says to call - turns out it's Kate's sister. She's on the account to get ready to close it. Jim calls her and finds out that Kate is not dying from brain cancer - she's literally crazy. She's getting re-commited to an asylum. It so happens that she was so lucid in WoW because it was her escapist fantasy - WoW was her real world and she was batshit insane in the real world - Imagine if you were a trade chat troll in real life.
So yeah. That was Jim's big foray into online romance. It kind of turned him off from it in the future for some reason.
I'm not sure if this is the kinda thread you'd want to eventually contribute to
As you all know by now, I dated a fucking sociopath for 2 years. Totally didn't realize it until after he dumped me (hindsight is 20/20 whatever yeah). Anyway, while we WERE dating, he would regularly let me know that I was forgetful. He would YELL at me, for forgetting something small and stupid, and totally...well...forgettable. Well, to fix this 'problem', he told me o buy post-its and write everything down. So I, whatever, I did. It worked for the most part, and everything was cool for a while.
Then, after a couple of weeks of that, he started screaming at me again because I forgot to clean out my closet like I said I would, or something ridiculous that doesn't warrant screaming. I told him that I remembered everything else, and he asked if I was using post its. I, of course, told him I was...because I was.
He started yelling at me again, even louder saying how I got too dependant on the post-its and that he was testing me to see if I'd "ween" my self off of them (what?..) and not have to use them any more bu apparently "that wasn't going to happen" and I "clearly wasn't trying hard enough to fix my self" (apparently I was broken, and sucked as a human being), stormed out of the room, slammed the door and gave me the silent treatment for a day (something he KNEW I hated more than anything).
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Obviously you don't need someone else telling you good job for getting out of that but... Good job getting the hell out of there.
Man, read the other thread that involves pics of him sexing underaged girls on docks.
Because seriously, while yelling about post it notes is ridiculous, this guy is less-than-stable in so many more flavors.
She hacked my email account, so she could see if I was reading her emails. She was constantly calling me. She would wait on the side of the road in her car for me to drive by after work then follow me back to my house to try and talk to me. One night she knocked on my door for 20 minutes trying to get me to go out and talk to her. She would randomly drive by my house. One time she tired to force her way into the house. This went on for about a month until things died down up till 3 months after the break up I started dating a girl from work.
My Ex found out about it and came over my house very upset. She felt that I was cheating on her by dating this girl because she had forbiden me from dating any girls from our town. Despite being broken up for 3 months. She brought a box full of all the stuff I had ever given her and demanded everything that she had given me back. I was more than happy to if it meant getting rid of her forever. I took the box she had brought and threw it in the trash right in front of her. She was sobbing uncontrolly, it felt so good to see her so upset. I felt such hate for her.
I don't know why but for some reason I didn't want to end things that way with her. She was my first date, first kiss first Love and all the shit she put me through I just didn't want to leave it like that. I sat down next to her and we talked. To me it felt like we had closure. She even apologized for stalking me and agreed to give me space.
It was partly my fault. This took place in high school, sophomore year.
I was dating someone very religious. I am not even remotely religious but yes it was still destiny for it to fail.
Part of the reasons why was that I have a very difficult time expressing my feelings, whether it's how much I care about someone to how upset I am and I do feel responsible.
He spent a good deal of time trying to convert me to his Baptist beliefs, but it wasn't working and he even got to the point where he didn't care what domination, he just wanted me to become a Christian. I refused because I follow my own beliefs very strongly and I don't believe that you should just change them because your boyfriend or girlfriend wants you to. There's always more fish in the sea!
I listened to his preachings, tried to be open minded and I stayed with him, and I even went to his church and a friend's church. Not only where they the most uncomfortable and alienating experiences I could remember but it didn't work and eventually he gave up and broke up with me. I was pretty upset about this but I saw it coming and did nothing so I felt even at the time that I should take part of the blame.
I wasn't expecting that I couldn't just simply relax, try to feel better and deal with the break up on my own terms. He and some other mutual friends would harass me about it in history class for a month. They told me to stop being stupid and stubborn, it's all my fault and to just convert already but I was so upset about the breakup and their harassment that I nearly got to the point of violence, and I'm more likely to run away in fear of a fly because I think it's a bee or something! He tried to confront me one day but I ended up screaming in his face that I've had enough and running away. I couldn't speak to him for 6 months afterwards.
I still struggle with sharing my feelings with people and I am working on it, but I know now not to date religious people, or at least ones who are as stubborn as I am.
So. Friend of mine at first, starts calling me all the time to talk about another girl that done him wrong. Aw, poor guy! Being the sympathetic person I am, I listen, console, etc. When we return to school the next semester, there's all sorts of sexual tension. We hang out literally every free moment we have, have tons of fun together, etc. He ALMOST kisses me several times, tells me he loves me, yada yada.
One day he calls me and says "Dulcius, we need to talk" which is the usual breakup line, but remember, we're not officially dating. I find this odd, we sit down, he tells me he's dating another girl. So I tell him, "fine, but really that sucks...you're acting as though you want to date me but you don't, which is kind of a dick move". We don't talk much the rest of the semester.
Over the summer he starts calling me again (I am at home in CA, he is in CO), apologizing, telling me that girl was crazy, he loves me, he doesn't know what he'll do without me...he even calls me one night and tells me he wants me to be his WIFE. I am a tiny bit flattered but more suspicious, to say the least. After that conversation, we don't talk for a week. He then calls me and says "I have something to tell you you're not gonna like..." Turns out he got fired from his job for being drunk. Like, getting drunk at work. I facepalm, tell him that's not too wise, but otherwise shrug it off. I ask him when this was, since we haven't talked in a week. He tells me "Tuesday" me: "So...the night you told me you wanted to spend your life with me, you were drunk?" He pleads, tells me he meant it this time, etc. We hang up. I'm pretty annoyed, which I think is understandable at this point.
We'd agreed that I would fly to CO and drive to school with him at the end of summer, and now I was stuck with that arrangement, so I decide to make the best of it. I get to CO, ready to at least be cordial and meet his family. He's giving me a tour of his town and says "Oh, by the way, I want you to meet my girlfriend later". I look at him with pure hatred in my eyes and cease speaking for about half an hour.
He pulls over and insists that I talk, and I explode at him for lying to me, manipulating my feelings over the course of the past few months, and basically tell him he doesn't know how to respect women. Needless to say, it's awkward the next few days, not to mention the 16+ hour drive to school.
When we get there, we find out one of my good friends has just lost her dad, who had a brain tumor. When she gets to town a few days later, I go over to see her and check on how she's doing, and he calls me. Repeatedly. Everyone there knows the story and pleads with me not to answer, but I finally do after multiple texts and calls. He insists on coming over, even though it was because "he needed to talk right now" and even though my friend had just lost a parent. So he comes over, yells at me and accuses me of telling people he's an alcoholic (I had no idea what he was talking about, as far as I'm aware he never was an alcoholic) and I tell him to leave, it's inappropriate for him to be here, we can discuss this later. He causes a big stink, everyone comes outside because they can hear him yelling, I walk with him to his car and tell him very calmly not to contact me, ever. He cries, which weirds me out. He leaves.
Because we shared so many mutual friends we eventually became cordial again, and about a year or so later he ended up calling me late one night to re-confess his affection for me (I was dating my current boyfriend). I tell him again that his actions are inappropriate, I have a freaking boyfriend, I'm not interested for pete's sake.
That's the craziest crazy I've dealt with...I've talked to his exes, though, and they have much worse stories. Eek.
Let me just say we are friends these days, we speak occasionally and he is considerably better. All this happened about 3-4 years ago. SO glad it's over.
TL;DR: "Dated" a weirdly indecisive guy who acted crazy but turned out strangely normal on the friend level.
This is the same ex from the first story, as well.
When we were together, she told me that she and her mother were very close. They talked about everything, knew pretty much everything about each other.
Well, one day my ex confided in me that when she was younger and was beginning her period, she wasn't sure exactly how to put her tampon in. So, of course, her mother put it in for her.
Now, being a guy, I don't really have much experience with this type of thing. But I'm relatively sure that is not something that normally happens.
Not how it happened for me AT ALL, but I have heard other girls say they've had a friend or their sister/mom help the first time.
It's just biology. Shrug.
It's different to me because A) I had never heard of such a thing and
And since I can only take cues about such things from women (as I have no experience with it), I have come to the conclusion that this is not only slightly abnormal, but it also horrifies most other women to hear it.
I mean, I had a friend explain it to me. But yeah, I guess the idea of someone (that is not a doctor or someone you're sexin') helping to actually insert something in your vagina (that isn't an OBGYN instrument or a finger/penis) is kind of...weird.
There was the time in high school when I was working at a radio station on Saturday nights. She'd occasionally come and hang out, maybe bring snacks. One time, she shows up, as expected with a bag of doritos for me and the other guys I'm doing the show with. Thing is, she literally throws the bag at me, before turning around and storming out of the room. I'm all WTF? And look at the other guys, and they're equally WTF? It wasn't even remotely weird for us to fight, but I usually at least knew what we were fighting about, where as this time, we'd been completely fine the last time I'd seen her earlier that day.
I go after her, and literally have to run to catch up, and ask her what the fuck her problem is. She tells me one of her friends told her she'd seen me down on main street kissing some other girl. So, instead of confronting me about it, she just assumes 100% guilt and starts chucking chips at my head. What was equally stupid was that I was spending literally every free moment of my time with this girl at that point. I wouldn't have the time to cheat, even if I wanted to, unless it was to buy a hooker or something.
As much as this doesn't seem possible, you really have no idea.
SHIT BE CONFUSING DOWN THERE
It's like the garden maze in The Shining
So...so you're saying you bought a hooker?
Here's a little piece of a advice: Ladies don't care where it goes.
Really depends on the position.
3DS: 1521-4165-5907
PS3: KayleSolo
Live: Kayle Solo
WiiU: KayleSolo
Limed because I hate that shit. Anyone like that has serious issues with trust and doesn't need to be with someone in the first place.
There are 2 ways a relationship like that can end:
1. You breakup with them because you are sick of constantly being under fire of ridiculous accusations that any normal person wouldn't believe.
2. One of you kills the other. Either you in self defense or her from just being bat-shit crazy.