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Massage question

joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class TraitorSmoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
edited February 2010 in Help / Advice Forum
My wife got me a 1-hour massage for my birthday and I have an appointment in a couple of hours. I've never had a professional massage before.

It seems to me that there's a lot of potential misinformation floating around. I've heard all kinds of things, including "it releases toxins" (which toxins are released is never specified), "it increases blood flow", and "it will make sex better".

Is there any actual empirical evidence that shows massage is something other than, "there's a nice lady touching you and making you feel good for an hour"?

Also, tips on how to get the most out of the massage are appreciated.

joshofalltrades on

Posts

  • bowenbowen Sup? Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    I always thought it was just to release stress and tension.

    Whoever says it makes sex better are probably the same people who think they get a happy ending with a massage or something stupid like that.

    bowen on
    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    edited February 2010
    bowen wrote: »
    Whoever says it makes sex better are probably the same people who think they get a happy ending with a massage or something stupid like that.

    I've actually heard it from people who aren't complete morons, but it still seems suspect to me.

    Maybe they were just expecting that and it turned into a self-fulfilling prophecy, or something.

    joshofalltrades on
  • bowenbowen Sup? Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Probably just because they're less stressed out. Less stress tends to help things like that.

    You'll probably feel like a million bucks. Just make sure, this probably goes without saying but I'll say it anyways, to be clean. I've heard horror stories from friends who are masseuses that say they get some pretty vile looking/smell/unkempt people and it's disgusting.

    bowen on
    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • Evil MultifariousEvil Multifarious Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    well from what i've heard the idea is that "knots" in your muscle are actually where the long fibrous tissue gets compressed and doesn't move smoothly, and a masseuse works along those fibrous tissues to smooth out the knots. this "feels good," sure, but it is also pretty painful and will leave you sore but relaxed.

    this is if it's a stress treatment massage, rather than just a relaxation massage, which seems to be meant to make you feel nice.

    Evil Multifarious on
  • SmokeStacksSmokeStacks Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    It's basically just an hour of feelgood, but really there is nothing wrong with that. One single massage isn't going to make you more flexible or make sex better or release any toxins in your body. If your friends believe that massage does those things, more power to them I guess. The placebo effect isn't always a bad thing.

    Like mentioned above though, make sure you are clean as a whistle before you go in. Your masseuse will appreciate it.

    Also, don't freak out if you get a boner.

    SmokeStacks on
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    edited February 2010
    SmokeStacks wrote: »
    It's basically just an hour of feelgood, but really there is nothing wrong with that. One single massage isn't going to make you more flexible or make sex better or release any toxins in your body. If your friends believe that massage does those things, more power to them I guess. The placebo effect isn't always a bad thing.

    Like mentioned above though, make sure you are clean as a whistle before you go in. Your masseuse will appreciate it.

    Also, don't freak out if you get a boner.

    I took a shower this morning, is 8 hours worth of not-having-taken-a-shower something I should worry about? I'm not a particularly dirty or smelly guy

    Not so much worried about the boner thing, I mean that's not really a concern unless she watches me get dressed again, right?

    joshofalltrades on
  • SmokeStacksSmokeStacks Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    If you've got the time I'd shower again, just as a courtesy. Remember that someone will be touching you with their bare hands.

    If you're on your back and you get an erection than it will be pretty obvious, but massage therapists know that it's just a physical reaction (they are touching you in places where you aren't usually touched, and they're moving a lot of blood around), and that it isn't a big deal.

    SmokeStacks on
  • NoquarNoquar Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    joshofalltrades wrote: »
    SmokeStacks wrote: »
    It's basically just an hour of feelgood, but really there is nothing wrong with that. One single massage isn't going to make you more flexible or make sex better or release any toxins in your body. If your friends believe that massage does those things, more power to them I guess. The placebo effect isn't always a bad thing.

    Like mentioned above though, make sure you are clean as a whistle before you go in. Your masseuse will appreciate it.

    Also, don't freak out if you get a boner.

    I took a shower this morning, is 8 hours worth of not-having-taken-a-shower something I should worry about? I'm not a particularly dirty or smelly guy

    Not so much worried about the boner thing, I mean that's not really a concern unless she watches me get dressed again, right?

    Most masseuses are very professional. Anyhow, who says it will be a woman? Would you have a problem with a man? You can't tell anyhow. But if it moves, you're not gay. Not that there is anything wrong with that. Had to throw the Seinfeld episode in there. But yes, make sure you are clean when you go in. If you took a shower in the morning, you are fine. Also, make sure you let the masseuse know while they are massaging what sort of pressure is working, and what is painful. A good hard massage can feel like you worked out and are tired, so make sure to drink plenty of water afterwards.

    Noquar on
  • SeptusSeptus Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    joshofalltrades wrote: »
    I took a shower this morning, is 8 hours worth of not-having-taken-a-shower something I should worry about? I'm not a particularly dirty or smelly guy

    No. I assume you don't habitually shower before sex?

    The masseuse is paid to do the job, and 8 hours without a shower is what I would consider quite standard.

    Septus on
    PSN: Kurahoshi1
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Septus wrote: »
    No. I assume you don't habitually shower before sex?

    No but I get in the shower to turn on the cold water and cry afterwards

    Also, I know it will be a woman, she has a massage business in the side of a hair salon and she is the only masseuse there

    joshofalltrades on
  • MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    edited February 2010
    My girlfriend gets deep tissue massages at our gym and she says afterwards she feels like someone had beaten her with a baseball bat. But typically she goes home, drinks like a gallon of water, takes a nap, and then feels like a million bucks when she wakes up.

    She also believes the toxin theory.

    MegaMan001 on
    I am in the business of saving lives.
  • EggyToastEggyToast Jersey CityRegistered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Of course the toxin thing is junk for all of the "detox" stuff out there (you already have a part of your body that handles toxins, it's called your kidneys. I guess your liver too if you consider alcohol a [delicious] toxin). But yeah, you'll lie down, they'll rub your muscles and they'll focus on knots and tight areas. I had physical therapy done for a couple months a while back, on my back muscles, and it typically hurts in a "ooh that hurts but also feels good" sort of way.

    Most of the details are up to the particular place or person doing it. So don't be afraid to say "so, I've never had a massage so don't be afraid to tell me what to do" or whatever.

    EggyToast on
    || Flickr — || PSN: EggyToast
  • witch_iewitch_ie Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    I've never had one, but my boyfriend had a deep tissue massage once that was supposed to remove toxins. Essentially this is not a relaxing massage, but one where they actually push the lactic acid in your muscles into your blood stream. This is why MegaMan's girlfriend needs to drink water after it.

    Just don't worry too much about it. You can ask questions when you get there. I'm sure your wife just wants you to be able to relax and enjoy.

    witch_ie on
  • Sir CarcassSir Carcass I have been shown the end of my world Round Rock, TXRegistered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Yeah, I'll reiterate that it won't be like when your SO gives you a massage. It will kinda hurt, but you'll feel more relaxed afterward.

    Sir Carcass on
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