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guar
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
I could use some advice, strictly non-job-related this time.
I'm looking to start seeing my therapist again, but now can't afford to. I work at a manufacturing job, where I'm required to call in, usually 2-3 days in advance, for any time available. On average, I can get about 3 days a week, which amounts to 36 hours or, at my current pay, roughly $650 every two weeks. Discounting everything save for rent and bills, I spend approximately $1000 a month.
I'm also a college graduate, going on 2 years now. I've never had a job, internship, or volunteer position related to what I went to school for. I'm looking to move into my field, but am completely intimidated about the whole process. This isn't strictly job-related however, as I have this problem with any social activity that I have little personal experience to draw from. I feel that starting therapy again may help. The problem is, as I've pointed out already, the cost.
I'm hoping for some advice on what I can do to get my life together. What can I do to either change my outlook on finding a job or start seeing my therapist again?
Old OP:
I'm looking to start seeing my therapist again, but now can't afford to. I work at a manufacturing job, where I'm required to call in, usually 2-3 days in advance, for any time available. On average, I can get about 3 days a week, which amounts to 36 hours or, at my current pay, roughly $650 every two weeks. Discounting everything save for rent and bills, I spend approximately $1000 a month.
I'm also a college graduate, going on 2 years now. I've never had a job, internship, or volunteer position related to what I went to school for. I'm looking to move into my field, but am completely intimidated about the whole process. This isn't strictly job-related however, as I have this problem with any social activity that I have little personal experience to draw from. I feel that starting therapy again may help. The problem is, as I've pointed out already, the cost.
I'm hoping for some advice on what I can do to get my life together. What can I do to either change my outlook on finding a job or start seeing my therapist again?
Old OP:
Around this time last year I was seeing a therapist for what can accurately be described as a moderate social phobia. Or, at least, that is what I would classify it as. I was "seeing" a psychiatrist as well, but that kind of ties in with why I stopped seeing both.
I can't tell you how well I responded to the therapy, but I can say I definitely didn't apply myself as much as I should have with regards to the treatment. I suppose I was more concerned about finding out what was wrong with me exactly than I was treating what I felt was a misdiagnosis. I understand that depression and anxiety can be interrelated, but I didn't feel like I was suffering from depression. Which is why I didn't respond well to being placed on antidepressants.
We tried a few different prescriptions, a supplement with one, and upping the dosage on each. After a while, I got tired of what I considered to be an ineffective treatment and took myself off the medication. Shortly thereafter I stopped seeing my psychiatrist. And eventually I stopped seeing my therapist. I can't tell you why because it was a stupid fucking thing to do.
All of this was happening at my father's expense. Following graduation, I had spent a couple months staying with family in NY and the two of us had made an agreement upon my returning home that I would start counseling. So now jump ahead to today, I have a manufacturing job that pays approximately $10.50 an hour, doing 12-hour shifts, that I have to call in for time. On average, I manage to get 3 days a week. At that pay, I make about $19k a year. Currently, I'm leasing an apartment. With my rent, bills, and other essential expenses, that covers about 4/5 of what I make.
My dilemma right now is this: I'm looking to get a job in the field I went to school for, but I'm extremely intimidated about the whole process. I've been out of school now for going on 2 years and I don't feel like I have any relevant experience, even for something like an entry level job. What I'm hoping is that by starting therapy again, I can work towards overcoming whatever fears I may have about job hunting. Except that costs money. More than I can afford.
I'm 24 and I'm a fucking hermit. I don't go anywhere because I can't afford to. I don't have a lot of friends because I don't go anywhere. All of this ties in with my shitty income. So what I ask of you, H/A, what can I do to get my life together? I'm miserable with how things are, but too afraid to do anything.
I can't tell you how well I responded to the therapy, but I can say I definitely didn't apply myself as much as I should have with regards to the treatment. I suppose I was more concerned about finding out what was wrong with me exactly than I was treating what I felt was a misdiagnosis. I understand that depression and anxiety can be interrelated, but I didn't feel like I was suffering from depression. Which is why I didn't respond well to being placed on antidepressants.
We tried a few different prescriptions, a supplement with one, and upping the dosage on each. After a while, I got tired of what I considered to be an ineffective treatment and took myself off the medication. Shortly thereafter I stopped seeing my psychiatrist. And eventually I stopped seeing my therapist. I can't tell you why because it was a stupid fucking thing to do.
All of this was happening at my father's expense. Following graduation, I had spent a couple months staying with family in NY and the two of us had made an agreement upon my returning home that I would start counseling. So now jump ahead to today, I have a manufacturing job that pays approximately $10.50 an hour, doing 12-hour shifts, that I have to call in for time. On average, I manage to get 3 days a week. At that pay, I make about $19k a year. Currently, I'm leasing an apartment. With my rent, bills, and other essential expenses, that covers about 4/5 of what I make.
My dilemma right now is this: I'm looking to get a job in the field I went to school for, but I'm extremely intimidated about the whole process. I've been out of school now for going on 2 years and I don't feel like I have any relevant experience, even for something like an entry level job. What I'm hoping is that by starting therapy again, I can work towards overcoming whatever fears I may have about job hunting. Except that costs money. More than I can afford.
I'm 24 and I'm a fucking hermit. I don't go anywhere because I can't afford to. I don't have a lot of friends because I don't go anywhere. All of this ties in with my shitty income. So what I ask of you, H/A, what can I do to get my life together? I'm miserable with how things are, but too afraid to do anything.
guar on
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because you are afraid of it?
All your therapist can really do for that is give you a funny look and tell you to do it anyway
you know, when you think about all the CBT and other therapies, when you boil it down, the above is pretty much truth
It's pretty much a giant self-esteem black hole from beginning to end.
But you can't get a job if you don't look for one.
I suggest getting a job at like Target or fast food joint just to get your feet wet. It's also (most times... we live in strange times) easier to get a job here then in anything you would describe as a "field".
It will get you out interacting with both the public (customers) and people (fellow employees).
Another thing about working in retail or fast food is that alot of the same issues fears concerns loves hobbies that you have they may have.
Go apply at some restaurants as a dishwasher or something. You'll earn a few extra bucks and meet a load of new people - at your own pace. Tons of my friends work at restaurants and they ALWAYS have social things going on after work. And hey, if you're feeling a little timid you can just politely decline any invites until you're ready.
I am not discounting your advice, I'm just not sure if I can manage 2 jobs with the one I have now (I've tried, when I first started this job, but it wore me out physically). I'm not on a fixed schedule, I work whenever I can, as often as I can. Sometimes this can be 3 days in succession, sometimes it can be one day early in the week and 2 or 3 later in the week. I've been working strictly days the past few months, but sometimes all that is available are nights. The only way I can foresee having a 2nd job would be if I were able to schedule the days I work like I am now.
What is preventing you from working 5 days a week?
The key is to be working on your craft. If on your days off you are actively pursuing whatever it is you want, you are going to be happy which results in more productivity. The worst thing you can do is stay in doors all day because you don't have to do anything. Get up, shower, get your coffee, go for a 45 minute walk and that'll get your brain thinking.
So for you, work on that resume, and send it! Take the attitude that you have nothing to lose, because you don't. Your job sucks, having an irregular schedule is unhealthy, and the solution to all your problems is finding a job, so just man up and do it. It's important to stay in a positive state of mind, because this makes life less intimidating when you're feeling good about yourself.
Also, start living slightly outside your means for the purpose of meeting people. I'm not talking anything crazy, but spend the 20 bucks it's gonna cost for cover and a drink to see a band with your friends or acquaintances. Being social often costs money, and living a little bit outside your means is a great motivator for thinking creatively on how to bring in more money. I don't think you can place financial stability over social health.
At my current job or in general? My job now has a pool of part-time on calls, so when we call in on the designated days, we can only pick one day. We have the option of calling back after 1pm to see if there is anything left. There usually isn't.