Squidbunny's stupid thread again (help me do a crappy cover really fast)
squidbunny
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Registered User regular
Partially retroactively spoilered for immense amounts of scroll.
Vane Black:
John Henry Hunter:
These are some pages:
Vane Black:
John Henry Hunter:
These are some pages:
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Love the borders too.
Excess is awsome in my opinion. I am elitist snob that loves over the top details regardless of whether they make sense. If theyre done well my heart bleeds tears of glee.
For instance take John Romita Jr. Fantastic artist in many respects who is almost a complete minimalist when it comes to backgrounds and added design elements. Hes nice too look at but he always leaves me kind of emptily wishing hed explore the visual medium and expand upon the idea that comics ARE A FUCKING VISUAL MEDIUM. Sorry, I just read the "Kick-Ass" comic and while the writing was cool enough I just found the artwork to be a very weak second.
I like what you are doing and would love to see the elaborate set up your indicating here continued throughout.
The only crit I have is that in the females poses, the one on the right with the tilted down hat, her head seems to be set at an awkward or off angle, kind of like her face is pointed a little more to her right, readers left, and the hat is angled the opposite way. I can't tell if that's just from the hat or if maybe the head is just tilted a little weirdly under the hat.
Very minor detail in a super awesome set up you have going. Thumbs up from me!
I get how the picture frames communicate that this is flashback, reinforced by the sepia tone of olde west pictures. The color of the flames is the one incongruous aspect of that motif. So let me guess: flames are what's going to transition us to the present? After the page flip we'll be back in the now with the protagonist ruminating on this important past event over a campfire?
Okay, you've hooked me. Now make more. More!
OP updated with 2&3.
Transitioning the flames into a phoenix-like spectre escaping from a coffin? Didn't see that one coming!
The only problem I ran across is in panel 7 of your last page. My eye was drawn to the next panel on the right instead of the one below. I see how you tried to tell me which way to go with your balloon placement, but I still missed the jump. I think it's because of two things: the motion of the losing gambler's exit leads me to lady gambler's wide eyes in panel 9 , and I'd feel as if I read myself into a corner if I read down, as proceeding up to the upper-left corner of panel 9 goes against my instincts.
Perhaps have her laughter spill out of the bottommost balloon on panel 7, flow down into panel 8, then go upward into panel 9 where it is terminated by a gasp of shock when J.H. Hunter makes his appearance?
As for your style, I meant to say that it is visually accessible to kids, unlike IDW's "30 Days of Night", for example. You've got bright colors and wonderfully exaggerated physiology. Who doesn't love that?
Maybe the content is not friendly to some kids, but given that I regularly tell stories of children fighting undead and/or alien threats to my brats, until I see boobs, gore or hard drugs, I say it's okay. Like a good Pixar movie, the adult situations go right past them.
But if your story were rated by the Motion Picture Association, what would you guess it would be and why? (without spoilers!)
I'd put it at an alternating PG-13/R, mostly for prostitutes and immolation.
I'm actually wondering if anyone has any thoughts on my choice of lettering font.
I'm not really a font whore, so all I can really say is the font works.
Also the hahaha seems kinda long, and made me want to go to the right panel, and the type size just seems kinda small for a good ol belly laugh.
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I happen to be partial to a non-capslock approach to lettering, but that's just my personal preference.
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Wow, hoist on my own retard, I guess, since I changed it to its present state specifically to avoid that. I'll have to fix it later. Agreed, I think, on the size. Also the kerning is weird.
Oh yeah, that works. I hear her laughter as she scoops up the cash and is suddenly cut off in the next panel, where I follow Mr. Hunter's arm up to her surprised face. Well done.
As earthwormadam mentioned, it does look like she might be chortling "aha" at the end of it, though.
I hadn't even noticed the font, which is traditionally the best compliment you can give. But now that you mention it, it looks kinda bold and the "F" seems to dip below baseline. I'm a fan of Blambot and would recommend something comic-standard like Digital Strip if you have a mind to change it. That said, your artwork brings across the voices just fine and the present font is readable so you don't have to do a thing.
Just please, please don't change it to something overly ornate like Westerner. I picked up a copy of Mouse Guard this weekend, and in spite of being brilliantly illustrated, the font choice made it tougher to read than it needed to be. It sounds like those freaking mice are all speaking on the floor of the Roman senate.
If you didn't notice the lettering initially, then yeah, I'm gonna take that as a point in its favor. Although the Fs do look weird at this web preview size, you're right.
Oh this thread's a few days old already, dang, I need to pay better attention.
The way the fire transitions into clouds in the second page is especially gorgeous, I must say. I look forward to seeing more.
Loving everything else though. It really reminds me of Kazu Kibuishi's Daisy Kutter.
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Keep it up, it's great to see some new stuff from you.
I see what you mean about the fire and I'll probably go back in and smooth it out some, actually. I'm trying to balance it looking cool with not spending forever and a day on each page; still trying to find my stride with it.
As always, I'm mesmerized by your attention to detail. The little things really make your story stand out. Love the steampunk weapons, and how Mr. Hunter is wanted for -- amongst other things-- Witchcraft. Alternate history established, yo.
EDIT: I was thinking about that dropping "F" in your font choice. Is it possible that the capitalized version might sit more on baseline? Even in an all-uppercase font, Piekos sometimes puts two flavors of letter in there to keep things interesting if case they are repeated in f/x (as per "oofff").
I was thinking exactly the same thing when I read that last page. I think you could spend a bit more time nailing down the expressions before commiting to them though squids. Some of them seem a bit peculiar, especially the cigarette lighting panels.
and i love the frame work on the panels
THREE CHEERS
Crist & Mustang; I was actually feeling like all these talking heads were looking pretty static so that's super rad to hear.
But Mustang: what's bugging you about the cigarette panels. I was pretty satisfied with those. She's supposed to look pretty stunned, since he lit the thing with no visible means, followed by apparently reaching a creepy uninvited hand toward her chest. So I was kind of going for surprise/mild affected outrage? Did I miss my mark?
Thanks, everybody.
They're just pencil, and they look like this:
YOU CANT BE THAT PERFECT, SQUID
YOU JUST CANT
No, actually the underdrawing on these I'm doing in non-photo blue (which obviously my scanner still reads but I can easily just dump those channels in PS).
I had to re-scan one, just to prove that I am terrible. And filthy. To really underscore, this is the page that is ugly and where I forgot to draw half the lines until I was in PS.
Wow, though, guys. Seriously thanks for the kind words. I am encouraged as hell.
Too bad westerns are all the rage, presently, and R* has made the ultimate western game tape, and I'll now probably be too preoccupied playing it to get this done in time to take advantage of the fact that westerns are all the rage.
One thing, though. Your male lead has a face that reads slightly sinister to me, almost like the villain in a Disney show/movie. Is this intentional?
Our first game is now available for free on Google Play: Frontier: Isle of the Seven Gods
you do blue wireframes to get everything set up
then you do your pencil lines
how do you clean them up?
how do you photoshop?
would love to see one of those process gifs from you
sorry im asking so many questions, i just adore this and im looking to start drawing a comic so i want to learn the best way to do it
and i like the way you do it
now i just feel like im hitting on you
Yea, that's right...show me your blue lines. Slowly.
Now take another layer off...ahh, there you go. Smooth lines, baby, smooth lines.
do you have this book?
i know it sounds ridiculous and he can rant quite a bit, but seriously, you should read it if you haven't. really helped me see things and understand some concepts i didn't realize were going on in comics.
PARKER, YOU'RE FIRED! <-- My comic book podcast! Satan look here!