I'm a student at UCSB and I'm trying to get my school to run my comic in the paper. I need sharp advice, critiques, and suggestions. Hurt my soul... jk just give me your best opinion... Now I've only got ONE so far because it takes a killer long time to do, but here's the basic premise: 4 roommates in college: A boy genius, a slacker, a paranoid albeit resourceful tech geek, and a gigantic mysterious fourth roommate who never leaves his room he just slumbers all day in it like a scary caveman/monster and plays WOW! ha We only see the glow of his eyes against the light of his computer screen.
This would be the second one in the series. Sorry, I know the font is too small to read, but please try your best. It'll work fine once its in a newspaper.
This is how it reads:
Tobey (red shirt)- Hey Chips, you're up early.
Chips (black sweatshirt)- I haven't slept. I spent all of last night studying "Lizard People" conspiracy videos on Youtube.
Tobey- And by "study" do you mean it's for finals or just recreational paranoia?
Chips- This is more important than any finals dammit! President Obama, Kobe, even Miley Cirus- they're all Lizard People from planet Niburu in disguise getting ready to take over the world in 2012! And now they're deploying newly designed mini-humanoid drones so they can infiltrate college campuses across the nation!
*Knock at the door
Chips- Who's that!?
Tobey- Wow, relax Chips. It's probably just the new roommate.
Chips- Don't forget to check if he has scales!
Tobey- Of course.
Tim (droid looking boy genius)- Hi... I'm the new roommate.
Tobey- No scales, but... mini-humanoid droids you say?
Chips- LIZARD PEOPLE!!!
I know for sure I need suggestions for:
#1 Color- like do the outfits look nice with the colors I have or should a change it up?
#2 I've considered two titles: "Roommates" or "Tim and Tobey"...the story is going to focus primarily on Tim and Tobey and their adventures so the "tim and tobey" title works, but which one sounds better??
#3 is the writing fluid enough? Does it read well and does the humor come through... wait is it even funny? It all makes sense to me, but what about to you?
#4 Characters and names- do you like these characters so far? Are they interesting? How about their names?
Ok thanks guys!