The new forums will be named Coin Return (based on the most recent vote)! You can check on the status and timeline of the transition to the new forums here.
The Guiding Principles and New Rules document is now in effect.
[MOBA DOBA] League of Yordles! Come play, it's FREE!
TyrantCow
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
Poppy's skin glowed in the torchlight of the League camp, beaded sweat glistening against dusky blue. Her chest rose and fell, slow and steady, her powerful muscles rippling at she held the straw-stuffed head to her lower yordle, demanding satisfaction from her terrifying lover. "Yes, Fiddlebaby! YES."
Poppy knew she had never experienced loving so tender, so intensely satisfying, before she began sneaking into the Noxus camp across the river late at night. She had shopped around, of course, giving her yordle loving away to suitors she thought might satisfy her. But Katarina was too timid, and Cho'gath simply too clumsy. Fiddlesticks knew his way around a yordle body, however. And Fiddlesticks also always knew what to say. "Yessss, Poppy. Yesss! Learn the true meaning of ORGASM! QUIVER IN FEAR AND DELIGHT MY PRETTY LITTLE YORDLE! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!"
It was always the insane cackling that sent Poppy toppling over the edge into climax, orgasm mounting on orgasm in an endless, mindless procession of lustful abandon. And tonight was even more perversely pleasing, because even though he clearly thought he was being secretive with his stealthy ways, Poppy could see another yordle in the bushes, watching and rubbing his mushroom. Maybe next time she would invite Teemo to join in for hot yordle three-way action.
THE END
TO BE CONTINUED??????
goddammit I promised I would write yordle slashfic and didn't. HERE YOU GO.
~~~~~~~I GOTS ME AN ACE MACHINE (Corki/Veigar)~~~~~~~
"I've never seen Runeterra from so high up before. Not that I see it from exceptionally low normally. I'm not that short!" Veigar's eyes, though still veiled by the brim of his hat, were wide with astonishment as he gazed down at the forests, rivers, hills and valleys passing below them.
"Well gosh darn, Veigy! You don't have to get defensive when it's just us yordles up here! We're short!" Corki didn't glance back at his ridinig companion as he spoke. That was so Corki. Grinning and blustering as he worked the levers and dials of his flying contraption, nonchalant about the amazing nature of the journey they were on, Corki always left Veigar feeling jealous. It was all so easy for Corki, never worrying about how others saw him. Veigar could only see himself in others' eyes, leaving the mystical yordle insecure.
But up here it was all different. Corki would never judge Veigar. Corki would never say things like "you must be THIS tall to enter Summoner's Rift" (DAMN THAT SHACO) or "you need a LITTLE help?" (DAMN THAT JAX) or "sorry I'm not really into guys, or non-furries, or yordles, or yordle children which I guess you are given how poorly your clothes fit you" (DAMN THAT WARWICK A THOUSAND TIMES OVER). Corki was sweet and kind, and gave Veigar a confidence he had never known. And up here in the clouds, Veigar didn't have to worry about what anyone else thought. Just his darling Corki.
"I wish we never had to go back, Corki. I hate it down there."
Corki turned his head back, looking straight at Veigar with a sly grin on his face. "Well, I can't do that, but you know what I can do? Put this sumbitch in hover mode and YORDLE YOUR YORDLE BUT GOOD."
And that is when they had hot gay yordle sex for like two hours.
THE END
~~~~~~~ CRY FOR MUMMY (Amumu/Heimerdinger flash) ~~~~~~~
Heimerdinger paced up and down the length of the hall, his arms waving wildly as he explained his thoughts. "Pure logic dictates our companionship! We are both outcasts in our own ways, you by dint of your post-mortal quantum state, and I because, despite my prestigious post at Bandle City Academy, my dizzying intellect separates me from my fellow yordles. But not from you because, and this is the key, my dear bandaged friend, what you need most is understanding! Not the sensitive emotional shoulder to cry on type, mind you, but true understanding, that which can only come from a mind so advanced as my own! Not that even the baser, weepy sentimentality sort of understanding is available from our fellow yordles in this league. I am the best candidate to plumb the depths of your sorrow, and analyze the root causes so as to turn your pain into sweet, delectable pleasure. In conclusion, we must have relations post haste, speaking and touching in such a way (designed scientifically by me of course) to relieve you of the emotional burden you carry. What do you say?"
Amumu smiled a little, as he began to slowly unwind the bandages covering his rotting yordle face. "I thought you'd never pick me!"
THE END
ChopperDave wrote: »i just realized that there are seven yordles currently in this game
the next yordle slashfic should be entitled "sivir white and the seven yordles" and it should be raw
~~~~~~~ SIVIR WHITE AND THE SEVEN YORDLES (Sivir/yordles) ~~~~~~~
Sivir White wiped the yordle juice from her chin, giving Grumpy Tristana a practical pat on the thigh to let her know it was Sleepy Poppy's turn. Life was good here in the mountains of northern Runeterra, ever since Sivir had arranged, through a complicated web of yordle sex, to get Veigar to betray Noxus and decisively end the battles of the League of Legends.
The yordles worked all day bringing Sivir White precious gems from their mine, and she rewarded them when they got home with mind-blowing yordle orgies (or yorgies, as she had termed them after the first one). She smiled, reflecting on this turn of events, even as she lowered her still-sticky mouth to Sleepy Poppy's yordlebox. Behind her, Dopey Veigar and Bashful Corki were working in tandem, stuffing all four of their combined tiny fists into Sivir White's cavernous (to a yordle) lovehole. Doc Heimerdinger observed from above, taking notes onto a clipboard as he monitored the efficiency of his ass-pounding device, which was hard at work with its whirring motors and rotating beads and hyper-quantum lubricant feed to give Sivir White the kind of anal attention she had always craved, and now knew she could only find from a yordle determined to be the best at every endeavor. Her hands were wrapped around wee little Sneezy Amumu and Happy Teemo's yordlepoles, and Grumpy Tristana had taken her place sitting atop Sleepy Poppy's face. It was perfect, everything in its place, everyone connected into a moaning, sweaty sexmonster. Sivir White and the Seven Yordles would never be apart again.
That's when the barrage of shurikens pierced the walls of their mountain cottage, maiming the yorgie participants even as a streak of lightning coursed in through an open window, moving with unbelievable speed through the cottage. Before anyone could react, they were all blinded with flashes of lightning and stunned into helpless fear. Their assailant spoke, even as he continued to hurl shurikens and call down the thunderous vengeance he had plotted so long. "EIGHT! THERE ARE EIGHT YORDLES! YOU MOTHERFUCKERS FORGOT ABOUT KENNEN."
THE END
~~~~~~~ ANYTHING FOR A YORDLEBUCK (Kat/Ashe) ~~~~~~~
(Editor's Note: Yordlebucks are the official currency of Runeterra.)
Katarina twirled her dagger on the calloused tip of her index finger, an old nervous habit. Katarina had lots of these old nervous habits, accumulated through a lifetime of justified paranoia. Palming coins, twirling daggers, counting exits: Katarina was a wealth of tics, all tied to her stock in trade.
At the moment, she was nervous because she'd been waiting at this crossroads for three solid hours. Her target was supposed to have passed through an hour ago, and she paid good money for the information, so she damn well expected to get the drop on her mark. Her nervousness didn't stem from fear of an ambush, though. She was afraid of her father. Not even that, precisely; she was afraid of her father's chief torturer, who had always eyed Katarina desirously. She knew her tortured death would be special delight for her, and last weeks if possible.
As Kat contemplated this awful fate, a new chill came over her, as the tip of an ice-cold arrow came to rest at the nape of her neck. A familiar voice, that of her target, echoed coldly through the copse Katarina had waited in. "Took the long way. Dismissed my bodyguards. I didn't know you'd be here, but... in a way, I hoped you would."
Katarina sneered, assessing her options even as she returned the banter. "Cocky as ever, Ashe. You got lucky this time, but after I'm dead there'll be others. I'm the best assassin out for your blood, but I'm not the only one."
Ashe actually laughed at this, and Kat felt the tension pressing the arrow into her flesh reduce just slightly. "Do you know how many of your clumsy colleagues I've lured into traps during my time in the League? You're my only real match. We both know that. Anyway, I'm not planning to kill you. Unless I have to."
This was unexpected. Katarina always planned for contingencies, but none of her plans took this into account. What was Ashe's game, then? Ransom? Noxus would never pay. Interrogation? Even if Kat would crack, she was kept in the dark to reduce potential risk if captured. What was Ashe playing at?
Ashe continued, "I need you, Katarina." There was something off about her voice. Some emotion, repressed but urgent, beneath the normal icy cold of her words. "You're a mercenary, and I'm rich. Rich enough to hire you several times over. Rich enough to pay your fee and whatever extra you'd need to risk becoming your father's new top assassination target." Kat felt Ashe's bow go almost completely slack, and she steeled herself to draw her hip dagger and turn the tables. But, for the first time in memory, the assassin hesitated.
"You don't need me. Who would you turn me against? Noxus doesn't have targets worth my price; we're all expendable. What's your game, archer?"
The icy cold of the frozen arrowhead disappeared, and Katarina instead felt warm flesh against her own. Ashe's breath was hot on her ear, whispering in needy tones. "Your target won't change. Just the mission. I need you, dear Katarina. I told you I have the money. Do you care what it's for?"
A slow smile crept over Katarina's face, and she twirled suddenly, just as she'd contemplated moments earlier. Her hand rose to Ashe's sternum, exactly as planned, but her dagger remained on her hip. For now, Ashe would live. Kat remained utterly mercenary, after all. "Fair enough. Boss."
Ashe's tent was miles away, and neither had any intent to wait. They both kept a careful eye on the road, watchful for any danger, as they made love beneath the trees.
Mordekaiser lay on his lover's chest, breathing in the warm, earthy musk with a sigh of content.
"You satisfy me like no other. With you I can truly be myself. There is no holding back with you." He hardly believed what had happened the last hour...
Seething hunks of flesh wrapped around glorious metal, writhing in a mound of ecstasy. No other could withstand his penetrating steel, his hardened alloys feeling their way into sensuous crevices.
Mordekaiser looked up at Alistar. "Take me again." Alistar rode him hard, holding nothing back. He could barely think for waves of pleasure flowing into him. His minerals cried out for more, more, more! Pinned under Alistar's weight, Mordekaiser could scarcely move yet he cared not. His iron fists clenched hard, driving massive grooves into the soft soil where they lay. This was too much to bear. He could feel a pleasant chill running down his metal as he reached climax.
"Ah, ah, Alistar. ALISTAAR". Mordekaiser gave a great gutteral roar, the sound smashing its way outwards with huge force. Alistar smiled, his mission accomplished.
Okay, League of Legends is a [vidurl="
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXKd7uuehlw"]DotA-style game[/vidurl] and it's FREE. The community is known to be a little less harsh than the standard DotA/HoN ones; but, you will still run across a fair amount of mouth-breathing silly geese. If you hang out with the PAers, though, we're usually pretty damn inviting (and so fucking cool, especially MooMan). AND IT'S FREE!!! Well... mostly. Here's the skinny: They have 10 free rotating champions that you can choose from, if you want to 'buy' champions permanently you can do that with Riot Points (RP) or Influence Points (IP). You get RP with real cash dollars, and RP prices are usually lower than IP prices. You gain IP for just playing game, when you finish a game you'll get IP points based on how well you did in the game. You can also purchase Runes. Runes and Masteries are applied before the game and make your champions stronger, this is referred to as the Summoner meta-game. You gain levels as you play as well which opens up the ability to put more runes and masteries to work for you. That's the quick and dirty of the game. If you're completely new to this style of game, check out the new player stuff on the Riot site.Here's your standard, wiki-stolen background:
Two main designers for the popular Warcraft III custom map, Defense of the Ancients: Allstars (commonly abbreviated as DotA), Steve "Guinsoo" Feak and Steve “Pendragon” Mescon are involved with Riot Games in the making of League Of Legends: Clash of Fates[6]. Guinsoo created DotA: Allstars from the original DotA, created by Eul, by adding his own mix of content, including over 40 heroes, numerous items, and various gameplay changes. Guinsoo then passed DotA: Allstars on to its current developer, Icefrog. Pendragon, who is the Director of Community Relations for Riot Games, helped create the DotA: Allstars website along with its forums, and is still currently working on League of Legends: Clash of Fates.
SIGN UP HERE
HANG OUT IN THE PENNY-ARCADE VENT TO GET GAMES!!! It's the easiest way to get going with us, just show up and ask if anyone is looking.
If you can't find any there check out the LoL vent (https://beta.leagueoflegends.com/board/showthread.php?t=6) and you can probably scrounge up a pre-made.
MooMan is known for listening to some bangin' tunes, so he's been nice enough to provide some music for you to listen to while you read up on the champions below.
The Champions
Click for more information
Click for more information
People that are playing, and that you might also want to play with:
PM me if you want to be added to the list, I'm probably not going to be able to pick up every in-thread request.
TyrantCow : MooMan
FightTest : FightTest
fadingathedges : fadingathedges
undeinpirat : undeinpirat
zanmatto : ParanoidDroid
Zombiemambo : EssGee
Cohsae : Cohsae
Nisi : Nisi
Sirson : Sirson
Originate : Originate
DebaserZbs : DebaserZbs
Endomatic : Barnabus
I needed a name to post : Pterodactyl Man
Zek : Zeyk
klok : fastpaced
ParisInFlames : skoot
Stolls : Karlinn
fmz65 : SensAZNal
UrQuanLord88 : urquan
TheSuperWoot : MelancholyMark
Lehman : Draggan
CharlesVI : CharlesVI
Bendery It Like Beckham : Bendery
DustedForLife : DustedAgain
Zoelef : Zoelef
soggychicken : soggychicken
Peas : jyajin
Custom Special : F4ll0ut
alset85 : alseT
king awesome : kingawesome
Mightyhog : Agreedo
Houn : Houn
In Starscream We Trust : In Starscream We Trust
TriadFate : TriadFate
Drakmathus : Drakmathus
Bardi : Bardi
MinionOfCthulhu : MinionOfCthulhu
Hrage : friedriceyum
Esc.Hatch : Hatch
distracted : Distracted
Feldorn : Mortenya
Adus : Adus
BaronVonNub : BaronVonNub
Zero-Control : ZeroControl
RawrBear : RawrBear
hiigaran : hiigaran
Thrawn200 : Mitthrawnuruodo
Seran : Seran
Colt : TheDeathJester
PolloDiablo : PolloDiablo
Slicer : Srice
Fiaryn : Fiaryn
Dracil : Dracil
Zalin : Zalin
Camui : Sogedan
Chubbly : Chubbly
Mugaaz : Mugaaz
Pyromaniac221 : abstrakt11
Shade : Hardcannon
nome : xcletus
Arch : Zinnar
Pmoney : Pmoney
Fleck0 : flecko
Saphier : errant
Thor1590 : Aphrodesizach19
PJStelford : PJStelford
Reagan : Reagan
programjunkie: Wicked Demiurge
Niqle : Niqle
nealcm : Alvarian
Tiger Burning : Tiger Burning
facetious : Bonhomie
Verr : verr
cutfang : Dancing Bagel
cwapfobrains : infobrains
Manetherenwolf : Manetherenwolf
Banana-Man : SaintAugustine
Evil Weevil : Evil Weevil
Karnius : Karnius
Nanaki : Nanaki
ResIpsaLoquitur : ResIpsa
jdmichal : KillerCodeMonky
CrownAxe : CrownAxe
Alecthar : Alecthar
Darkewolfe : Darkewolfe
NBoomer : NBoomer
FightTest : FightTest
fadingathedges : fadingathedges
undeinpirat : undeinpirat
zanmatto : ParanoidDroid
Zombiemambo : EssGee
Cohsae : Cohsae
Nisi : Nisi
Sirson : Sirson
Originate : Originate
DebaserZbs : DebaserZbs
Endomatic : Barnabus
I needed a name to post : Pterodactyl Man
Zek : Zeyk
klok : fastpaced
ParisInFlames : skoot
Stolls : Karlinn
fmz65 : SensAZNal
UrQuanLord88 : urquan
TheSuperWoot : MelancholyMark
Lehman : Draggan
CharlesVI : CharlesVI
Bendery It Like Beckham : Bendery
DustedForLife : DustedAgain
Zoelef : Zoelef
soggychicken : soggychicken
Peas : jyajin
Custom Special : F4ll0ut
alset85 : alseT
king awesome : kingawesome
Mightyhog : Agreedo
Houn : Houn
In Starscream We Trust : In Starscream We Trust
TriadFate : TriadFate
Drakmathus : Drakmathus
Bardi : Bardi
MinionOfCthulhu : MinionOfCthulhu
Hrage : friedriceyum
Esc.Hatch : Hatch
distracted : Distracted
Feldorn : Mortenya
Adus : Adus
BaronVonNub : BaronVonNub
Zero-Control : ZeroControl
RawrBear : RawrBear
hiigaran : hiigaran
Thrawn200 : Mitthrawnuruodo
Seran : Seran
Colt : TheDeathJester
PolloDiablo : PolloDiablo
Slicer : Srice
Fiaryn : Fiaryn
Dracil : Dracil
Zalin : Zalin
Camui : Sogedan
Chubbly : Chubbly
Mugaaz : Mugaaz
Pyromaniac221 : abstrakt11
Shade : Hardcannon
nome : xcletus
Arch : Zinnar
Pmoney : Pmoney
Fleck0 : flecko
Saphier : errant
Thor1590 : Aphrodesizach19
PJStelford : PJStelford
Reagan : Reagan
programjunkie: Wicked Demiurge
Niqle : Niqle
nealcm : Alvarian
Tiger Burning : Tiger Burning
facetious : Bonhomie
Verr : verr
cutfang : Dancing Bagel
cwapfobrains : infobrains
Manetherenwolf : Manetherenwolf
Banana-Man : SaintAugustine
Evil Weevil : Evil Weevil
Karnius : Karnius
Nanaki : Nanaki
ResIpsaLoquitur : ResIpsa
jdmichal : KillerCodeMonky
CrownAxe : CrownAxe
Alecthar : Alecthar
Darkewolfe : Darkewolfe
NBoomer : NBoomer
Last thread we tried to get an idea of the amount of people who would be interested in a PA Tournament. The turnout was poor, I am disappointed with you all.
Also, here's a picture of BigWah's adorable kid that he may or may not have had considerable disagreements with in the past:
Long live the Bearcock!
TyrantCow on
0
Posts
also
if you missed out on last season of league of legends, we were posting our homemade fan art!
What is wrong here?
Anyways here's a true depiction of Eve:
Streaming 8PST on weeknights
This is redundant from two threads ago.
Also:
...next level that is
RECOGNITION FOR MY ART
Gamertag: Cunning Hekate // League of Legends: FeroxPA
oh my, penis-horn.
:winky:
I essentially aced a Mundo/Gragas/Janna team that had us on the ropes the entire game.
Mandreds, Mallet, Infinity, ownage
we also talk about other random shit and clown upon each other
rabble arouser
e: i am shameful and forgot thornmail. imagine thornmail
I can imagine some sort of CDR would be solid for him, I've also heard of magic pen over AP for him but you'll have to ask an actual Zilean player.
and CDR makes it EVEN FASTER.
Gamertag: Cunning Hekate // League of Legends: FeroxPA
I was too lazy to draw actual enemies, but those are supposed to be corpses. Note my attempt to draw X'd out eyes.
Oh fuck I forgot to draw arms.
Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
I went 1-9 and 1-10 in two consecutive games, said "fuck it," and went back to owning shit up with Karthus.
Gamertag: Cunning Hekate // League of Legends: FeroxPA
The main problem with Jax was always the fact he was a tank and DPS simultaneously. This is not even close to the case with Kat. If you play overly aggressive with her, even if you have 10+ kills over everyone else in the game, you will die. You also cannot defeat people much more fed than you 1v1.
Compare this to Jax pre-nerf (seen less of him recently, so I don't have an official opinion on if it was enough or not), who could fight in stupid odds, and could kill many other melee like a well played Shen when even at half their kills and 2/3 their gold.
To say I got tired of having a Jax 1v1 me from 100% life when I was carrying my team with full anti-melee items is an understatement (Doran's Shield, Ninja Tabi, Phage, Warden's Mail. Notice a pattern?). Kat cannot do that, at all.
That Fallout 3 OP must have been absolutely incredible, then.
Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
Gamertag: Cunning Hekate // League of Legends: FeroxPA
You spelled "awesomer" wrong, I highlighted it for you.
Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
LoL Summoner: infobrains | XBL: cwap4brains | PSN: infobrains
2.) You could just read the description of the product. "Collector's Pack Content: One exclusive alternate Champion skin model -Kayle the Judicator; 20 playable Champions; 4 special Summoner Runes; $10 of Riot Points for use in the Store"
But thanks for telling me, couldn't see it elsewhere.
also, i hate twitch
I can't access Phreak's build currently because I'm at work, but my final build usually looks something like:
Berserker's Greaves
Stark's
Aegis
Soul Shroud
Last Whisper
Black Cleaver (usually a game doesn't last this long)
The aura items really depend on what my team composition looks like and what other people are building, though Stark's is pretty much always built my me when playing Sivir.