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Oh god aaaaaa (Filled with Weenies and dicks)

1356763

Posts

  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    Yeah, Ted the Caver

    Which if I recall was heavily influenced by (read: pretty much ripped off from) another short story which I can't find now
    If it's HP Lovecraft, I think its "The Mysterious Case of Juan Romero," which I always thought was funny because it was basically the name of John Romero, but in Spanish.

    It wasn't that, actually; it was another internet story
    But now I guess I need to read this one!

    Grey Ghost on
  • trentsteeltrentsteel Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Bucketman wrote: »
    THE HANDS RESIST HIM

    I don't get it.

    Also the first like 9 episodes of Marble Hornets.

    Edit: see what happens when I don't pay attention.

    gw500h642.jpg

    you son of a

    trentsteel on
    http://www.botsnthings.com/
    I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!

  • trentsteeltrentsteel Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Tasteticle wrote: »
    Macera wrote: »
    I've never really had nightmares actually, though for a while now I've been having that old "turns out there was a class you weren't taking all semester dream", even though I'm on summer break

    I have that dream all the time

    The massive freak out that happens when you are like "WHAT? I am IN this course?!?! Oh GOD I have missed EVERY CLASS IS THIS A DREAM OH FUCK PLEASE FUCK FUCK IT'S NOT A DREAM"

    Then the massive amount of relief that washes over you when you wake up

    And I got my degree almost a year ago

    I have these too. Every few years. Ever since University.

    trentsteel on
    http://www.botsnthings.com/
    I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!

  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited June 2010
    The whole 'forgot you were in class/forgot to do your work' thing still happens to me constantly, despite being out of university for 5 years now.

    I dunno for other people, but I think for me that kind of dream manifests itself most when I have outstanding issues in my life - for example, I'm preparing for a big move, I have a lot of loose ends to take care of, and lots of upcoming plans/events. So for me, those dreams are my brain's easiest way to deal with the feeling of 'oh man holy shit there is so much crap going on right now'

    Houk on
  • TasteticleTasteticle Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    Tasteticle wrote: »
    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    Tasteticle wrote: »
    One of my night terrors is on a family tape somewhere

    I was running around the house freaking out because there was something after me and I could not stop doing math

    So I was running around yelling out my times tables, and various simple equations

    My mom was trying to chase me down to wake me up

    What does my dad do?

    He gets the video camera

    Everything I have heard about your dad today has been awesome

    He is a good man and the father I hope to become one day

    Minus all the fat and the hair

    Nope because ONE DAY ALL THIS WILL BE YOURS

    THAT'S NOT TRUE

    THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE

    Tasteticle on

    Uh-oh I accidentally deleted my signature. Uh-oh!!
  • FoodFood Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Tasteticle wrote: »
    One of my night terrors is on a family tape somewhere

    I was running around the house freaking out because there was something after me and I could not stop doing math

    So I was running around yelling out my times tables, and various simple equations

    My mom was trying to chase me down to wake me up

    What does my dad do?

    He gets the video camera

    post this on youtube!

    Food on
  • trentsteeltrentsteel Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    One time I had a girlfriend and she lived on the fourth floor of a condo.

    One night I couldn't fall asleep despite just having worked a double shift. I never have this problem.

    At 2:30 am. I decided to get up and drink some orange juice and read something to try and pass out while she slept next to me.

    I got to the kitchen and heard the elevator door open out in the hallway. Just for shits and giggles I thought I would look out through the peephole to watch some drunk walk back to his apartment.

    I looked out the peephole and there was a guy in a black cloak standing there, staring at the door. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up and I thought holy fuck this can't be real. I stared at whoever it was through the peephole for a couple of minutes, I even kicked at the door but the guy wouldn't budge.

    I quickly returned to the bedroom to get my clothes on and my girlfriend woke up and I said SOMEONE IS STANDING AT YOUR DOOR.

    Dude was gone.

    The freakiest part of it was that he had probably been doing it for years, I just randomly happened to catch him.

    trentsteel on
    http://www.botsnthings.com/
    I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!

  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    trent was that when you made that thread

    And you were gonna stay up every night in case it happened again

    Grey Ghost on
  • nateknatek unh unh Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    are we posting scary homemade gifs and drawings as well?

    natek on
  • trentsteeltrentsteel Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    trent was that when you made that thread

    And you were gonna stay up every night in case it happened again



    yes. He never came back, not on my watch anyway.

    months after we broke up she said that a cab driver in the building got up early to start his car and he noticed a large black man with two duffle bags standing in front of this door, staring at it. He was half-asleep and thought nothing of it--probably just waiting for someone to let him in--until he was driving and realized that it was two young girls that lived there alone.

    trentsteel on
    http://www.botsnthings.com/
    I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!

  • GatsbyGatsby Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    trent there is not a D: big enough in the whole world...

    Gatsby on
  • scrivenerjonesscrivenerjones Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    I just opened a D&D thread about philosophy, it's pretty aaaaaa-worthy

    scrivenerjones on
  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    it was.. THE RAKE!

    Melding on
  • trentsteeltrentsteel Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Yeah it turned out he wasn't wearing a cloak, he was the newspaper delivery guy and he had a hoodie or something on.

    Still, there was a moment when all those childhood fears I had rationally talked myself out of over the years came flooding back and I though this is fucking real all that shit is real.

    trentsteel on
    http://www.botsnthings.com/
    I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!

  • GatsbyGatsby Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    But why would he just stare at the door and not move? Maybe the dude was really tired?

    Still would have scared the shit out of me at that hour.

    Gatsby on
  • TonkkaTonkka Some one in the club tonight Has stolen my ideas.Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    TStii.jpg

    Oh god I've seen these
    There's a whole gallery of them, somewhere, and they're all creepy as shit

    Mark Ryden is one of the greatest painters EVER.

    Tonkka on
    Steam: evilumpire Battle.net: T0NKKA#1588 PS4: T_0_N_N_K_A Twitter Shirts and such HELP!
  • nateknatek unh unh Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    because I made this for gatsby

    http://i47.tinypic.com/2eobbtl.jpg

    natek on
  • BarcardiBarcardi All the Wizards Under A Rock: AfganistanRegistered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Along the caving lines, i am reading the book Blind Decent by James Tabor. It is about caving. There are at least 52 ways to die while caving:
    1. Acetylene explosion (acetylene still used by some as fuel for cave lamps)
    2. Camp stove explosion (white gas or butane)
    3. Fall while climbing rock
    4. Fall while downclimbing rock
    5. Fall while ascending rope
    6. Fall while rappelling (descending rope)
    7. Rockfall
    8. Dig or tunnel collapse
    9. Unplanned detachment from rebelay
    10. Failure to complete change from rappel to ascent, and vice versa
    11. Prusik knots jammed
    12. Prusik knots won’t grip
    13. Ascenders slip on muddy, wet, or icy rope (this one almost got me on a 250-foot drop)
    14. Strangulation in vertical gear
    15. Fall from losing grip on handline
    16. Rope anchor failure
    17. Rope failure
    18. Rope cut by falling rock
    19. Ladder failure
    20. Uncontrolled rappel
    21. Harness carabiner opens during rappel (as with Chris Yeager)
    22.Rappel shunt (emergency brake) defeated during rappel
    23. Unwanted rappel shunt activation
    24. Rappel off end of rope (as with Alexander Karabikhin)
    25. Drop rope
    26. Rope recoils out of reach after rappel
    27. Rappel into pit without ascent gear
    28. Foot hang
    29. Chemical contamination of rope
    30. Animals eat rope
    31. Rappel rack nut falls off
    32. Hair caught in rappel rack
    33. Clothing or chinstrap caught in rappel rack
    34. Sewn sling tears
    35. Exhaustion
    36. Hypothermia
    37. Drowning
    38. Becoming lost
    39. Out of light
    40. Entrapment by flood
    41. Entrapment by rockfall
    42. Asphyxiation by methane, carbon dioxide, blast fumes, etc.
    43. Locked inside gated entrance
    44. Poisonous snakes and insects
    45. Struck by lightning while in cave stream
    46. Struck by lightning while talking on cable telephone to surface
    47. Rabid bat bite
    48. Bacterial or fungal infection: histoplasmosis, etc.
    49. Hyperthermia (some caves are 130F)
    50. Incapacitating injury
    51. Incapacitating illness
    52. Stuck in crevice

    So in one day you could burn up or freeze to death, and then get struck by lightning that you never see or even know about because you are underground.

    Also there is this wonderful thing called "The Rapture" whereupon you lose your shit and have to get outside right now, whatever the cost. That includes going nuts on your party, cutting ropes, smashing things, jumping off of cliffs, eating bats, etc etc.

    "Those who have suffered from it describe it as being similar to an anxiety attack while on methamphetamines."

    Non supernatural pure horror.

    Barcardi on
  • RaneadosRaneados police apologist you shouldn't have been there, obviouslyRegistered User regular
    edited June 2010
    natek you're a bad person

    Raneados on
  • FandeathisFandeathis Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    So this is a really weird and currently unexplainable, but absolutely true story that happened to me. Back when I was dating this one girl, she one day told me that I had to watch out for a ghost. This ghost apparently appeared when she was doing sexual things. Now this girl had been raped as a kid by her older brother, and this dickwad (who I unfortunately met a couple times) told her that this ghost had been born as a result of the rape. So anyway this ghost has appeared before when she was having sex in a car, once when she was masturbating in the pool, and once more when she was masturbating in her bedroom. She told me it appears as a ball of energy, but has another form that only she has seen. (Her brother and mom swear they have seen it in its energy ball form as well.) She claims to have talked to this ghost, and that it never speaks back, but always listens and stares. She thinks it has some strange agenda.

    So I pretty much laugh at all this shit, and figure that it's a big (and rather distasteful) prank. Some story to scare me when we are boning or something ridiculous like that. So anyway, one night we had just finished up in the backseat of my car. We were not high on anything or drunk (as was sometimes the case), but we had been going at it for a while and were tired as fuck. I see this blue mass shoot past the car and down the road in front of us as I am putting my boxers back on. The thing gives me a cold chill. I'm thinking to myself, "man that was so intense that I am seeing shit, damn!"

    So I exclaim, "What the hell was that?" She looks at me with the most serious face ever and says, "he's here, I can feel him." At that moment I swear my whole body went numb with fear. I look down the road and there is a giant (as in at least ten feet tall) blue glowing man with a giant beard and a HUGE misshapen thing on his head. He was wearing no shirt and fucking overalls. I can see him staring right at me and then he just vanishes.

    Alright, so obviously I just saw that shit because of an overactive imagination and post-orgasm chemicals running through my brain. So I laugh and say, "Oh wow I am trippin' haha." My girlfriend looks at me and says, "I know you saw him." Now considering that she had only told me about the ball of energy form of this ghost, I was like, "Oh this is great, I will ask her to describe it and finally I will be able to prove the whole ongoing story as bullshit." So I ask her, "Oh yeah, what did he look like?"

    And her response was, "He's a glowing blue giant with a huge beard, and today he was wearing his overalls and his hat made out of EYEBALLS." At that moment I completely lost it and started crying uncontrollably. I have never been so scared and terrified in my entire fucking life. I don't believe in ghosts or the supernatural, and this is the only time anything like this has ever happened to me.

    Since then, she cheated on me and we broke up. I've never seen anything at all like it since. I still to this day try to think really hard about how she could have sneaked clues to me about what the ghost looked like without me noticing over time, so that I secretly had a mental image to go off of or something. But then that just sounds so ridiculous and I know it's not true. It bothers me greatly that I may never be able to explain what happened. I still don't really believe in ghosts. But my absolute faith in their non-existence has been shaken. If I ever see anything like that again that other people can describe to me as well, I think I may actually have to start believing in some kind of supernatural or inter-dimensional being that is able to exist.

    All I know is, I'm happy someone else has to deal with this rape-ghost now. Glad it's not me.

    Fandeathis on
    You fuck wit' Die Antwoord, you fuck wit' da army.
  • MaceraMacera UGH GODDAMMIT STOP ENJOYING THINGSRegistered User regular
    edited June 2010
    earwig_real.jpg

    The St. Helena earwig, sadly extinct

    Macera on
    xet8c.gif
  • trentsteeltrentsteel Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Gatsby wrote: »
    But why would he just stare at the door and not move? Maybe the dude was really tired?

    Still would have scared the shit out of me at that hour.

    My best theory is that he was schizotypal and he had this delusion that by standing at these attractive women's doors he was somehow psychically communicating with them or leeching their essence or something.

    That might sound nuts but I work at a psych hospital so it wouldn't surprise me if it was something like that.

    trentsteel on
    http://www.botsnthings.com/
    I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!

  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Reoccurring dreams I have:
    1) I am driving. My brakes go out. I cannot stop for the life of me. Then I crash.
    2) I cannot stop crying. Not sure why.
    3) I am in high school.
    4) My mom is trying to have sex with me.

    Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

    Penguin Incarnate on
  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    the hat made of eyeballs made me laugh. I wouldn't be able to take that seriously.

    He could be stomping down my walls trying to kill me, i would still laugh.

    Melding on
  • trentsteeltrentsteel Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Fuck you fandeathis FUCK YOU

    trentsteel on
    http://www.botsnthings.com/
    I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!

  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Like picture it. Giant blue man, huge beard, overalls, and a sombrero made of eyes.

    Melding on
  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    natek fuck you so hard

    Go to hell and die

    Grey Ghost on
  • Wrench N RocketsWrench N Rockets Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Reoccurring dreams I have:
    1) I am driving. My brakes go out. I cannot stop for the life of me. Then I crash.

    Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

    Yes I have this. Except my brakes don't go out, they just barely work so I'm mashing them and mashing them and we're not slowing down fast enough and go here comes the intersection oh man stopped in the middle of it thank god.

    I also have these weird as shit dreams where I'm trying to run, but I can't move fast enough on two legs or something, so I'm also using my arms to try to run/gallop faster. Man they're messed up dreams.

    Wrench N Rockets on
    sig_lambo.jpg
  • FandeathisFandeathis Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Melding wrote: »
    Like picture it. Giant blue man, huge beard, overalls, and a sombrero made of eyes.

    It was totally not a sombrero. Just a mass of something. If you had seen it, you would not laugh. Although I certainly couldn't see what the hat was made out of from the distance I was at. At that point I just pretty much believed whatever she said about it.

    Fandeathis on
    You fuck wit' Die Antwoord, you fuck wit' da army.
  • TasteticleTasteticle Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    I had a dream last night

    That I was posting on the PA boards

    When I woke up my gf asked me what I had dreamed about

    I told her

    And she still had sex with me

    Tasteticle on

    Uh-oh I accidentally deleted my signature. Uh-oh!!
  • nateknatek unh unh Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    natek fuck you so hard

    Go to hell and die

    I drew that for gatsby

    you go to hell for looking at it
    :x

    natek on
  • Wrench N RocketsWrench N Rockets Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    rabbit.gif

    Wrench N Rockets on
    sig_lambo.jpg
  • trentsteeltrentsteel Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    yeah the eyeball hat thing. That's one of those things that if you actually saw it you would not be able to think it was funny.

    trentsteel on
    http://www.botsnthings.com/
    I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!

  • MaceraMacera UGH GODDAMMIT STOP ENJOYING THINGSRegistered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Turning in now, but I'll leave you with these follicle mites, to remind you that you are never alone

    317e32b.jpg

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q26f475T7NY&feature=related

    Macera on
    xet8c.gif
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Okay, staying out of this thread till morning

    Grey Ghost on
  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Fandeathis wrote: »
    Melding wrote: »
    Like picture it. Giant blue man, huge beard, overalls, and a sombrero made of eyes.

    It was totally not a sombrero. Just a mass of something. If you had seen it, you would not laugh. Although I certainly couldn't see what the hat was made out of from the distance I was at. At that point I just pretty much believed whatever she said about it.

    Oh i'm sure to see it would be horrifying, and i would be scared until she said "hat made of eyeballs" then i would laugh.

    But i'm broken so, I'm really not a good example of anything.

    I also learned to not trust my eyes at night so i probably would have thought little of it at all. could have just seen a vague shape that your mind hadn't put together yet and then she said it and BAM! that's what you saw.

    Not trying to make fun of you don't get me wrong, just the idea of a eyeball sombrero is HILARIOUS.

    Melding on
  • nateknatek unh unh Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    was probably just a guy she hired to get rid of her boyfriends when she is done with them

    natek on
  • trentsteeltrentsteel Registered User regular
    edited June 2010
    I know some psych hospital stories too, I'm sure some of you have read before like about the invisible little girl or the phone call from nowhere.

    I try my hardest not to believe in this shit either but sometimes, just like that big blue guy story, people witness things that they can't deny but can't explain either. I don't believe in demons but something happened in my home town that makes me leery enough that I won't do certain things just incase. I also won't tell the story because it freaks me the fuck out.

    trentsteel on
    http://www.botsnthings.com/
    I made a TD for iphone and windows phone!

  • OlivawOlivaw good name, isn't it? the foot of mt fujiRegistered User regular
    edited June 2010
    Reoccurring dreams I have:
    1) I am driving. My brakes go out. I cannot stop for the life of me. Then I crash.
    2) I cannot stop crying. Not sure why.
    3) I am in high school.
    4) My mom is trying to have sex with me.

    Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

    freud2.jpg

    Olivaw on
    signature-deffo.jpg
    PSN ID : DetectiveOlivaw | TWITTER | STEAM ID | NEVER FORGET
This discussion has been closed.