Oh dear God: former Marvel CEO splices Pac-Man with 90210 for TV series

cloudeagle

With all the news about Kinect, Move and the 3DS, it turns out we managed to miss one of the more fascinating announcements to come out of E3.

Namely, that Avi Arad has lost his fucking mind.

More specifically, that he wants to make a new Pac-Man series. With an updated version of the character. How is he updated? Hoo boy. All I can say is that this doesn't appear to be some sort of elaborate joke.

The latest news out of E3 is that Avi Arad, former CEO of Marvel Studios and now executive adviser for Namco Bandai, is developing a new television show starring Pac-Man. Variety reports that Arad showed a three-minute teaser of his vision for the new Pac-Man at an E3 event celebrating the game's 30th anniversary.

This wouldn't be the first time Pac-Man has made his way to TV. Back in the 1982, at the height of the game's popularity, the character starred in a Saturday morning cartoon. The new show would improve on that with computer animation and stereoscopic 3D. Arad's goal is to "create a show that speaks to teenagers and tells the story of a hero who doesn't know his own strengths."

According to Variety, the plot centers around ghosts who are trying to overtake Pac-Man's world. It's up to Pac-Man, who's a high school student, to save the world. In this mission, he'll be assisted by his Pac-friends and four friendly ghosts -- Pinky, Inky, Blinky and Clyde. Yes, you read that right, in this version the game's ghosts would be Pac-man's allies, not his enemies.

At this point, the project has only gone so far as Arad's imagination. Now that the big announcement has been made, though, he'll be approaching potential partners with the trailer that premiered at the E3 event.

"We feel we have a unique opportunity to have an action adventure, human interest story," Arad said. "As a filmmaker, it's a unique opportunity to get to know the characters you play. … We don't know what happened to Pac-Man's parents. He's the only yellow one in Pac-Land; what does that mean? Is it a social statement? We'll find out."

Pac-parents? A social statement? Sounds pretty complex for a spherical character known primarily for chomping pellets and avoiding ghosts.

http://tv.ign.com/articles/109/1099961p1.html

Want to see the horror for yourself? Go here:

http://www.gametrailers.com/video/e3-2010-pac-man/700876

I.... what? I mean... there are no words.

Buttcleft

i'm gonna go hit myself in the temple with a hammer until the hurting stops.

maximumzero

Did you see the new character design?



I miss the all-black eyes.

Henroid

I think he missed April Fool's Day by a couple months.

Ninja Snarl P

It's nice to see in this day age that someone is willing to go out of their way to prove that one can still make a strong career out of the position of Village Idiot.

undeinPirat

i don't know if you guys can tell but i am vomiting repeatedly

FireWeasel

I think Avi has been chomping one too many pellets.

The Lovely Bastard

this sounds like the best thing

Warlock82

Wait, what? I mean, let's ignore the completely ridiculous plot for a second. Pac-man's parents? Why is Pac-man yellow? Isn't um.. Ms. Pac-man yellow too? Are they saying he married (and had babies with) his sister or something with this? Seriously... WTF?

Also, he is freaking yellow because the game was developed on crap hardware in the 1980s that could only do so much with graphical detail. Don't ask me why they invented a bunch of random, irrelevant extra characters YEARS later and they were not yellow. I mean, seriously, what's next? We going to ask why Peach is the only non-mushroom person (or turtle person) in the Mushroom Kingdom?

P.S. - You want to know what happens when you try to convert a non-sense video game franchise into something like this? This happens.

SirUltimos

Well I'm gonna cry myself to sleep tonight.

Sagroth

AHAHAHAHAHAHA

Oh man this can't get any worse.

Ninja Snarl P

The guy must be incredible in the sack to convince somebody to let him make this, um, thing.

Also, I find it delightful that the show is going to feature a hero who eats everything to win when we can't hear enough these days about how fat kids are. Brilliant.

Henroid

Sagroth wrote: »

AHAHAHAHAHAHA

Oh man this can't get any worse.

The split-off show will be Ms. Pac-Man.

TetraNitroCubane

I - wha - Buh? I... I can't even begin to fathom why anyone would think this is a good idea. I can't even rationalize why someone would think this is an idea that should be vocalized in public. They tried a Pac-Man TV show. It is best forgotten, lost to the tide of pop-culture history along with parachute pants and Nintendo breakfast cereal.

I'm pretty sure this T-Shirt based interpretation of Pac-Man is more accurate and interesting than anything Avi's project will spawn:

BTP

Sagroth wrote: »

AHAHAHAHAHAHA

Oh man this can't get any worse.

Personally, I'm neutral to this. :P

Cantido

There Will Be Brawl?

TrippyJing

I kind of liked Super Mario Bros.

ogcam777

BTP wrote: »

Sagroth wrote: »

AHAHAHAHAHAHA

Oh man this can't get any worse.

Personally, I'm neutral to this. :P

Welp, time to go try and dig this image out of my brain with a spoon.

Shadowfire

So ..... it's real..

http://www.gametrailers.com/video/e3-2010-pac-man/700876

I'm guessing a big increase in bleach sales after this?

Also, even the trailer is in 3D. :P

Buttcleft

WHY IS EVERYTHING IN 3D I DONT NEED TV OR MOVIES IN 3D

maximumzero

Shadowfire wrote: »

So ..... it's real..

http://www.gametrailers.com/video/e3-2010-pac-man/700876

I'm guessing a big increase in bleach sales after this?

Also, even the trailer is in 3D. :P

That wasn't terrible, to be fair. If I was 8 I'd be into it.

It's just a slightly more terrible version of Sonic X, it seems.

Buttcleft

i just watched the trailer.

I need a bigger hammer.

firewaterword

Brilliant.

Ninja Snarl P

So. "Ghosts" are invading which apparently not everyone can see and Pac-Man has to get wasted on magic pills so he can pig out using his super-munchy-hungry powers.

Hey kids! It's okay to be crazy! Just take lots of drugs and eat tons of food!

Malkor

Jesus wept.


I don't for a second believe that his is true.

Also those dudes in the audience clapping.

Fucking sycophants.

Gilder

Avi Arad on Namco-Bandai wrote:

Well, they'll carry anything, gaming community, because I pitched them a show where Pac-Man and the ghosts were teenagers, and I was a teenager too, and we were all pirates, but every week we would have different jobs and identities. And they called back and said it was brilliant!

Gumpy

There are no words to describe my current feelings

MrVyngaard

No facet of my childhood is sacred from these fiends.

cloudeagle

Ugh. That video.... UGH.

Shadowfire

Random thought: anyone have some of those ugly 3D glasses from the theater? Do they work on the trailer?

Vegan

That seriously looks like a parody that The Onion would make of 80s video game cartoons.

Zython

Warlock82 wrote: »

Wait, what? I mean, let's ignore the completely ridiculous plot for a second. Pac-man's parents? Why is Pac-man yellow? Isn't um.. Ms. Pac-man yellow too? Are they saying he married (and had babies with) his sister or something with this? Seriously... WTF?

Also, he is freaking yellow because the game was developed on crap hardware in the 1980s that could only do so much with graphical detail. Don't ask me why they invented a bunch of random, irrelevant extra characters YEARS later and they were not yellow. I mean, seriously, what's next? We going to ask why Peach is the only non-mushroom person (or turtle person) in the Mushroom Kingdom?

P.S. - You want to know what happens when you try to convert a non-sense video game franchise into something like this? This happens.

In other words:

IT'S FUCKING PAC-MAN! WHO THE HELL CARES?

This is why we can't have nice things.

Olivaw

I can't

I don't

What the

Huh?

maximumzero

You people are seriously overanalyzing this and overreacting accordingly.

It's a fucking kids cartoon. Right up there with Sonic X, the old Mario cartoons and that abomination of a Kirby cartoon.

It looks fucking better than your beybladez and yugiohs and whathaveyou at least.

cloudeagle

maximumzero wrote: »

You people are seriously overanalyzing this and overreacting accordingly.

It's a fucking kids cartoon. Right up there with Sonic X, the old Mario cartoons and that abomination of a Kirby cartoon.

It looks fucking better than your beybladez and yugiohs and whathaveyou at least.

Kids cartoons don't have to make your brain dribble out your ears. See: Batman: The Animated Series, SpongeBob, Flapjack, the entire output of Pixar, etc. etc.

maximumzero

cloudeagle wrote: »

maximumzero wrote: »

You people are seriously overanalyzing this and overreacting accordingly.

It's a fucking kids cartoon. Right up there with Sonic X, the old Mario cartoons and that abomination of a Kirby cartoon.

It looks fucking better than your beybladez and yugiohs and whathaveyou at least.

Kids cartoons don't have to make your brain dribble out your ears. See: Batman: The Animated Series, SpongeBob, Flapjack, the entire output of Pixar, etc. etc.

Of course they don't have to, but with the exception of Batman the rest of those shows are original concepts. Adaptations of existing media for children are generally terrible. You folks are acting like this will be the first terrible cash-in kids cartoon ever.

Viscountalpha

maximumzero wrote: »

cloudeagle wrote: »

maximumzero wrote: »

You people are seriously overanalyzing this and overreacting accordingly.

It's a fucking kids cartoon. Right up there with Sonic X, the old Mario cartoons and that abomination of a Kirby cartoon.

It looks fucking better than your beybladez and yugiohs and whathaveyou at least.

Kids cartoons don't have to make your brain dribble out your ears. See: Batman: The Animated Series, SpongeBob, Flapjack, the entire output of Pixar, etc. etc.

Of course they don't have to, but with the exception of Batman the rest of those shows are original concepts. Adaptations of existing media for children are generally terrible. You folks are acting like this will be the first terrible cash-in kids cartoon ever.

You have to admit, this is pretty bad. The only way I made it through that trailer was without the sound. It's not as bad as yugioh is but it's pretty bad.

cloudeagle

maximumzero wrote: »

cloudeagle wrote: »

maximumzero wrote: »

You people are seriously overanalyzing this and overreacting accordingly.

It's a fucking kids cartoon. Right up there with Sonic X, the old Mario cartoons and that abomination of a Kirby cartoon.

It looks fucking better than your beybladez and yugiohs and whathaveyou at least.

Kids cartoons don't have to make your brain dribble out your ears. See: Batman: The Animated Series, SpongeBob, Flapjack, the entire output of Pixar, etc. etc.

Of course they don't have to, but with the exception of Batman the rest of those shows are original concepts. Adaptations of existing media for children are generally terrible. You folks are acting like this will be the first terrible cash-in kids cartoon ever.

Yet the word "terrible" still applies.

Couscous

Are his eyebrows supposed to look like ears?

mastrius

I made it halfway through the trailer but decided to kil.......

lowlylowlycook

Isn't this more like Buffy than 90210?