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The Drink of God Damn Champions

joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class TraitorSmoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
edited July 2010 in Social Entropy++
coffee1242220886.jpg

Don't get me wrong before I even get started here. I enjoy coffee in all its variations, with or without additives, made by French press or a $10 coffee maker, in a styrofoam cup or a wonderful heavy mug. But nothing beats plain black coffee. As Larry Underwood said in Stephen King's The Stand, "If you wanted a cup of cream and sugar, whydja ask for coffee?"

Instant coffee, though, does not exist and the only reason it will be discussed in this thread is for mocking purposes.

I personally have a pretty crappy drip machine at home, but every once in a while when I feel like dragging my lazy, bony ass out of bed an hour earlier than normal I will use my press because it has the ability to make coffee even more delicious than normal.

Tell me how you make your coffee and what you put in it.

I guess you can talk about tea as well but my eyes will more than likely completely gloss over your posts.

joshofalltrades on
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Posts

  • SnowbeatSnowbeat i need something to kick this thing's ass over the lineRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    so is this going to be like a bluefoxicy thread but about coffee instead of facial hair

    Snowbeat on
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  • QuetziQuetzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User, Moderator mod
    edited July 2010
    We already have a thread about whiskey

    Quetzi on
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    No this is going to be like a joshofalltrades thread but about coffee instead of WILFORD BRIMLEY SANDWICH, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

    joshofalltrades on
  • Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood My baby's in there someplace She crawled right inRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    Black coffee? Fuck you man.

    Clint Eastwood on
  • Sara LynnSara Lynn I can handle myself. Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    I make coffee all damn day.

    If I was passionate about it this might rule but nah not really.

    It's cool cause I still get to use this machine.
    1zyac1k.jpg

    Sara Lynn on
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    Clint Eastwood wrote: »
    Black coffee? Fuck you man.

    If you have to cover the taste of coffee with milky sugary slurry then you don't really like coffee

    joshofalltrades on
  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    I like coffee when it is not coffee and is hot chocolate.

    ChicoBlue on
  • ButlerButler 89 episodes or bust Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    Black coffee out of a french press is not bitter and horrible like other kinds of black coffee.

    Butler on
  • BugBoyBugBoy boy.EXE has stopped functioning. only bugs remainRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    I do not like coffee

    tea is best

    preferably chai

    BugBoy on
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    I like coffee when it is not coffee and is hot chocolate.

    Hot chocolate is decent if there are tiny marshmallows handy

    Otherwise, coffee

    joshofalltrades on
  • EdcrabEdcrab Actually a hack Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    I like coffee when it is not coffee and is hot chocolate.

    Whereas I like coffee when it is not coffee and it is actually a great big bag of money

    Edcrab on
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  • QuetziQuetzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User, Moderator mod
    edited July 2010
    joshofalltrades wrote: »
    Clint Eastwood wrote: »
    Black coffee? Fuck you man.

    If you have to cover the taste of coffee with milky sugary slurry then you don't really like coffee

    I use cream because otherwise coffee is often too thin and watery

    It is a consistency thing, not a taste thing

    I mean cream is delicious, that does factor in, but

    Quetzi on
  • thorgotthorgot there is special providence in the fall of a sparrowRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    I like coffee when it is not coffee and is hot chocolate.

    yes

    that kind of coffee is delicious

    thorgot on
    campionthorgotsig.jpg
  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    I like coffee.


    So I don't put anything in it because when I want to drink coffee, I want to fucking drink coffee.

    sarukun on
  • Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood My baby's in there someplace She crawled right inRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    joshofalltrades wrote: »
    Clint Eastwood wrote: »
    Black coffee? Fuck you man.

    If you have to cover the taste of coffee with milky sugary slurry then you don't really like coffee

    Yeah, I really fucked up, liking things that taste good. Lick my butt.

    Clint Eastwood on
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    They ground Satan's testicles into a fine powder for you to put into your drink

    saccharin.jpg

    joshofalltrades on
  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    Clint Eastwood wrote: »
    joshofalltrades wrote: »
    Clint Eastwood wrote: »
    Black coffee? Fuck you man.

    If you have to cover the taste of coffee with milky sugary slurry then you don't really like coffee

    Yeah, I really fucked up, liking things that taste like Goddamn baby formula.

    yeah, no, fuck you, you don't get to be snarky about liking sugar drink.

    sarukun on
  • Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood My baby's in there someplace She crawled right inRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    I put milk and sugar in my coffee.

    I hope you guys enjoy your gross black poop water.

    Clint Eastwood on
  • EdcrabEdcrab Actually a hack Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    How about actually using... sugar

    Why do so many people use sugar substitutes, how about not using anything at all

    Edcrab on
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  • SnowbeatSnowbeat i need something to kick this thing's ass over the lineRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    heh

    coffee

    heh

    Snowbeat on
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  • ButtersButters A glass of some milks Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    The "You don't like coffee unless it's black" opinion is among the most annoying ever. People can have their coffee and tea however they damn well please.

    Butters on
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  • iamthepiemaniamthepieman Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    Cream is great in coffee. Not half and half. Real thick pure jersey cream.

    EDIT: from a cow.

    iamthepieman on
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    Hey it's cool if you like to load up your caffeinated beverage with whatever, I'm not here to judge it's just my preference man

    I enjoy a white chocolate mocha now and then

    joshofalltrades on
  • THEPAIN73THEPAIN73 Shiny. Real shiny.Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    people always said when i was older i would like coffee

    i am older

    coffee is still terrible

    THEPAIN73 on
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  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    Butters wrote: »
    The "You don't like coffee unless it's black" opinion is among the most annoying ever. People can have their coffee and tea however they damn well please.

    We are going to fight about this and that is all there is too it.

    sarukun on
  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    Caffeine will be the death of me.

    Uriel on
  • Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood My baby's in there someplace She crawled right inRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    Oh sarukun, you and your wacky opinions.

    Clint Eastwood on
  • FrankoFranko Sometimes I really wish I had four feet so I could dance with myself to the drumbeat Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    coffee is shit

    coffee flavoured candy is alright

    Franko on
  • iamthepiemaniamthepieman Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    THEPAIN73 wrote: »
    people always said when i was older i would like coffee

    i am older

    I'm still terrible

    iamthepieman on
  • HeavyVillainHeavyVillain Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    Edcrab wrote: »
    How about actually using... sugar

    Why do so many people use sugar substitutes, how about not using anything at all

    something sweet tasting that doesnt rot your teeth

    it is baffling!

    HeavyVillain on
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    sarukun wrote: »
    Butters wrote: »
    The "You don't like coffee unless it's black" opinion is among the most annoying ever. People can have their coffee and tea however they damn well please.

    We are going to fight about this and that is all there is too it.
    joshofalltrades wrote: »
    Hey it's cool if you like to load up your caffeinated beverage with whatever, I'm not here to judge it's just my preference man

    I enjoy a white chocolate mocha now and then

    joshofalltrades on
  • Fire TruckFire Truck I love my SELFRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    I drink more tea than I do coffee.

    But I have recently started to appreciate coffee more.

    Tell me, pretentious black coffee drinkers, how much cream and sugar am I allowed to put in my cup-o-mud before I am considered a girly-man?

    Fire Truck on
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  • ButtersButters A glass of some milks Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    It doesn't mean you don't like coffee, it means you don't like black coffee. It's like saying cheese pizza is the only pizza and you don't like pizza if you want sausage and green pepper on it.

    Butters on
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  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    Actually the high fructose corn syrup will, but the caffeine doesn't help with my anxiety and depression.

    Uriel on
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    Fire Truck wrote: »
    I drink more tea than I do coffee.

    But I have recently started to appreciate coffee more.

    Tell me, pretentious black coffee drinkers, how much cream and sugar am I allowed to put in my cup-o-mud before I am considered a girly-man?

    If you only drink frappuccinos, then you are a girly-man

    Otherwise it is impossible for me to care less about how you enjoy your drink

    joshofalltrades on
  • Fire TruckFire Truck I love my SELFRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    joshofalltrades wrote: »
    Fire Truck wrote: »
    I drink more tea than I do coffee.

    But I have recently started to appreciate coffee more.

    Tell me, pretentious black coffee drinkers, how much cream and sugar am I allowed to put in my cup-o-mud before I am considered a girly-man?

    If you only drink frappuccinos, then you are a girly-man

    Otherwise it is impossible for me to care less about how you enjoy your drink

    VALIDATION

    Fire Truck on
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  • StaleStale Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    I have this:

    keurigb60.gif

    and now that I'm single again, I can drink it whenever I like. My ex didn't like the smell of coffee.

    Though right now it's way too fucking hot for coffee.

    Stale on
    easysig2.jpg
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    Uriel wrote: »
    Actually the high fructose corn syrup will, but the caffeine doesn't help with my anxiety and depression.

    Man how can you feel depressed, you're drinking coffee

    You're a fucking king

    joshofalltrades on
  • EdcrabEdcrab Actually a hack Registered User regular
    edited July 2010
    I like my coffee like I like my women

    Black to begin with and then you pour the milk and add the sugar

    Edcrab on
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  • SnowbeatSnowbeat i need something to kick this thing's ass over the lineRegistered User regular
    edited July 2010
    can't wait for somebody to get in here and start talking about how really good coffee only comes from antique french presses made before 1954

    Snowbeat on
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