Advice on Dealing with annoying Characters

Kistra

So I am having a situation that is making gaming less fun than it used to be for me. There is another player in my gaming group(s) that likes to play arrogant pricks and has an uncanny knack for making characters that make my character significantly less useful.

He has done this in three different games now in two different systems (the fourth was arrogant but in no way similar to my character's playstyle). The first time he knew what my character was, the other two times apparently it was random dumb luck. The characters are objectively worse than mine, but they still take over my role for plot related reasons: ie my pilot skill is higher, but he gets to be the pilot because his background says he is good friends with the owner of the ship.

The DM finds his characters amusing and we are specifically not allowed to kill them anymore unless we ourselves are in mortal danger. I don't really know this guy outside of gaming - he is a friend of some friends I game with, he seems nice enough, but any time I bring this topic up he shrugs and says "that is just what my character would do". If I bring it up IC the rest of the group looks uncomfortable and lets us argue for a few minutes before just trying to smooth it over - and for "background reasons" we have repeatedly gone with his plans.

Is there anything I can do? Other people in the group have commented that he enjoys playing assholes, but they seem to find it more amusing that irritating. At the same time he isn't displacing their characters repeatedly. I do really like the rest of our play group and don't know of any others around.

Edith Upwards

A DM's pet situation like this quickly goes up in flames if you start shit.

Find out what he's playing and play something else, I suggest some sort of support role dedicated solely to helping the other dudes and easily breezing past the parts of the game that nobody likes. Eventually he'll stop being such a jackass, it'll just take time.

Thanatos

Yeah, swapping characters sounds like your best option.

fadingathedges

This is sort of general - but can you outshine him in some specific area? That might help.

I would also advise that your character start playing pranks on his character. Keep it in game, but embarrass the shit out of his character.

edit: I'm thinking, keywords: oiled halflings, bacchanalia, town guard, mayor's wife, detailed sculpture

Kistra

fadingathedges wrote: »

This is sort of general - but can you outshine him in some specific area? That might help.

I would also advise that your character start playing pranks on his character. Keep it in game, but embarrass the shit out of his character.

edit: I'm thinking, keywords: oiled halflings, bacchanalia, town guard, mayor's wife, detailed sculpture

Swapping characters makes me kinda sad but I will look into it.

Most of those keywords won't actually help at the moment. The two active games are a SAGA game and a Rogue Trader game so no town guards or halflings.

Thanks for your suggestions.

psolms

then you just need to do a little creative word replacement:

oiled [strike]halflings[/strike] wookies, [strike]bacchanalia[/strike] crowded cantina, [strike]town guard[/strike]imperial garrison, [strike]town[/strike]grand moff's wife, detailed [strike]sculpture[/strike]holopad recording

HamHamJ

1) Play an even bigger asshole.

2) Tell your group to go fuck themselves.

Terrendos

Have you tried discussing it with him out of the game?

Pulling pranks on him may give you relief, but if he is nursing some grudge then it's only going to make things worse. I'd try an open, honest conversation first.

Kistra

Terrendos wrote: »

Have you tried discussing it with him out of the game?

Pulling pranks on him may give you relief, but if he is nursing some grudge then it's only going to make things worse. I'd try an open, honest conversation first.

I have, but only before/after a game. This has resulted in him just saying "that is what my character would do".

Whyther

Is the "what my character would do" line only in defense of being an asshole or is he using that to explain why he is taking over duties your character is better equipped to handle? I think the best thing to do is tell him that you are frustrated when you guys end up playing similar characters and he outshines you, and then suggest that you both work hard to not play similar characters.

Jam Warrior

Ignore the people telling you to turn it into in game conflict. That is unless you want your relative level of unfun at the game to be lowered by making everyone else in the game miserable as well.

If talking to the player hasn't helped, try the DM.

Chanus

Jam Warrior wrote: »

Ignore the people telling you to turn it into in game conflict. That is unless you want your relative level of unfun at the game to be lowered by making everyone else in the game miserable as well.

If talking to the player hasn't helped, try the DM.

Yeah. Passive Aggressive bullshit isn't going to solve the problem, and if dude gets off on being a dickwad, then it's just going to make things worse.

If talking to the guy doesn't change things and addressing it with the group doesn't change things, you have two options:

1>Deal
2>Leave

OptimusZed

First off, disclosure: I'm married to the OP and we play in the same groups.

I think the issue of being "overshadowed" is largely a manufactured one, and I have expressed this multiple times. To use the current Saga game as an example, she plays a Twilek Soldier/Noble who has spent her considerable wealth on tons of incredibly damaging weaponry and she has the best ranged combat skills in the game. Oh, and she happened to train pilot. The other guy plays a Gungun Scoundrel/Scout who, while he owns a blaster, can't hit the broad side of a barn. He did, however, train Pilot, take Vehicular Combat and Fool's Luck, so he's pretty focused on piloting.

And her beef is that he pilots and she doesn't. Because her Pilot skill, thanks to a marginally higher Dex, is a little higher than his, her view is that the pilot gig is hers to turn down. When she could just take the gunner seat and blow the everloving fuck out of everyone in this quadrant.

The reality is that the two characters don't actually have that much crossover, it's largely an imagined slight. The two characters don't have much in common at all, and the gungun certainly isn't overshadowing her in any way shape or form. She just needs to focus on the things her character does well (and in fact better than anyone else in the party) and stop worrying about getting to do everything that she could potentially do.

As for the intraparty conflict angle, I was the one that suggested it. One specific instance she brought up in conversation about this was the gungun pushing her out of the weapons command station after she'd fixed it, and proceeding to use the weapons that she was better qualified to use. My replay was something to the effect of; "You're a noble-born twilek asskicker and this plebe just had the gall to muscle you out of the way? I'm pretty sure that's when you deck the commoner and get back at the guns."

Kistra

I would like to point out that your actions are the reason we aren't allowed to kill this player's characters anymore.

Yes, the current SAGA game isn't the best example. But it was the straw the broke the camel's back. In Rogue Trader he came in and took over in a really assholish manner and most of us got to do nothing at all last session. And in the other SAGA game he would tell me how poorly I played a Jedi at least every half hour. It got to me eventually. All of it together.

Chanus

Be honest... Zed is the assy guy, isn't he?

It's okay. You can tell us. :P

OptimusZed

Chanus wrote: »

Be honest... Zed is the assy guy, isn't he?

It's okay. You can tell us. :P

Well, I did sell her last Saga character into slavery.

Repeatedly.

Sipex

I've got a player like this, and a couple of my other players have come forward and said "We don't have fun when he does X." or whatever. I can't stop him from doing everything, he's naturally charismatic and creative so he takes charge easily and comes up with good ideas, this is how he has fun.

As a compromise I see to it that everyone gets their plans heard at the table (telling other members to be quiet while people voice their opinions), when ideas get scoffed at I'll ask him 'Why is this a bad idea?' instead of letting his charisma take over and I give them situations where he can't automatically take over (ie: The party splits up for alternate research and I party him with a character who doesn't mind his attitude or the contact is more receptive to the other players).

Also, I talked to him about it and he agreed to be reasonable, so that helped.

I guess what I'm saying is, your DM should be helping with this too. It's his job to make sure you're all enjoying the game after all just as much as it's your job to handle the situation maturely.

Jam Warrior

From my experience on the player's side, the frustration can be when the DM goes with the actions of the first player to declare rather than taking in everyone's intentions before determining what happens. This often results in the loudest player stealing the spotlight while someone who is a bit quieter and likes to think a bit before acting never gets a chance to contribute.

OptimusZed

This guy is a bit of an instigator, and he rarely takes the time to think through his actions.

Kistra on the other hand always takes a few extra seconds to try and find the "right" course of action.

The guy who GMs our Saga game doesn't necessarily take the first person to respond, but he does assume that characters are acting independently of each other which means that the poorly thought-through actions of one player can cause a lot of cascading issues for everyone else. And the player in question has been the genesis of a lot of those issues because of his style.

Whereas the rest of us generally just kind of roll with it (or leave him to his fate when he makes a particularly poor decision), when it gets in the way of doing things the smart way it grates on Kistra quite a bit I think.

Sipex

I can respect that way of playing as it's how life would work. If you had an impulsive character who didn't think things through before acting that's how it would go down in real life.

Maybe a better solution for you guys would be to give you sections where you have the time to plan beforehand, that way when he gets his less than thought out ideas on the table the group can look at them and say "That might work in a pinch but we have time to come up with a more thorough plan."

OptimusZed

Well, we tend to spend a lot of the games reacting to stuff that happens.

But we also split up quite a bit, which means that we don't have to deal directly with it a lot of the time.

As a forinstance, my character and his character were separated from the rest of the party when he decided to start a hostile takeover of his clan by stabbing one of the guys in charge. Which I just watched (him fail at), after which I helped the clan secure him and eventually exile him (I kicked him off the barge myself).

Apparently my Destiny was to save him, but that just wasn't my style. So I didn't. And we both laughed about it while his character shuffled away from the barge and into the desert.

I'm pretty sure the guy just likes doing crazy things and watching the fallout, both from the GM and the players. Most of us just don't take it as personally as Kistra does.

fadingathedges

Jam Warrior wrote: »

Ignore the people telling you to turn it into in game conflict. That is unless you want your relative level of unfun at the game to be lowered by making everyone else in the game miserable as well.

If talking to the player hasn't helped, try the DM.

I dunno, this still sounds good to me. It was stated that the issue is with the character not the player, and I would specifically avoid escalation beyond that in the spirit of avoiding drama.

I'm not supported sowing chaos and angst - but rather humor. Be his foil.



ps lol oiled wookiees.

HamHamJ

If someone uses the "it's just what my character would do!" defense, you are perfectly justified in having your character react appropriately and without mercy.

OptimusZed

HamHamJ wrote: »

If someone uses the "it's just what my character would do!" defense, you are perfectly justified in having your character react appropriately and without mercy.

This has universally been my response, and it's worked just fine.

Jam Warrior

OptimusZed wrote: »

Most of us just don't take it as personally as Kistra does.

Well I hope you like sleeping on the couch!

Seriously though. Without assigning any rights or wrongs, if someone is as unhappy with the situation as Kistra clearly is, then talk needs to be had and compromise needs to be found or she's going to stop playing, and you don't want that now do you? Telling someone to 'find this more fun!' just doesn't work :P

Horseshoe

OptimusZed wrote: »

Chanus wrote: »

Be honest... Zed is the assy guy, isn't he?

It's okay. You can tell us. :P

Well, I did sell her last Saga character into slavery.

Repeatedly.

Was she a Twi'Lek or a Wookie?

Because... heck why not sell them into slavery.

:P


aw dammit TOTP suggests Horseshoe once again is a fantasy bigot.

OptimusZed

Horseshoe wrote: »

OptimusZed wrote: »

Chanus wrote: »

Be honest... Zed is the assy guy, isn't he?

It's okay. You can tell us. :P

Well, I did sell her last Saga character into slavery.

Repeatedly.

Was she a Twi'Lek or a Wookie?

Because... heck why not sell them into slavery.

Twi'lek. Dressed like a dancing girl, in fact.

Horseshoe

Man, that is some top dollar Twi'Lek right there.

I mean you could run like a "Good the Bad and the Ugly" style capture/rescue scam with that kinda angle.

Sipex

Christ, slavery is basically her neutral state then.

Horseshoe

Yeah, unfortunately if you're a Twi'Lek your options in life are:

a) Slavery

b) Slavery

OptimusZed

Her character progression was basically; Slave -> Runaway Slave -> Inquisitor Trainee -> Fugitive Jedi

Most of the time when I sold her it was part of a scam. Once, though, I'm pretty sure it was just to make a buck and be rid of her.

OptimusZed

Horseshoe wrote: »

Yeah, unfortunately if you're a Twi'Lek your options in life are:

a) Slavery

b) Slavery

Her new character added an option;

c) Be born a noble and have your own slaves.

Horseshoe

OptimusZed wrote: »

Horseshoe wrote: »

Yeah, unfortunately if you're a Twi'Lek your options in life are:

a) Slavery

b) Slavery

Her new character added an option;

c) Be born a noble and have your own slaves.

Oh yeah I forgot about that one.

A Twi'Lek noble at least has a chance not to be sold into slavery... as slim as that might be.

Kistra

And I didn't care when Zed or one of the other characters took turns selling me into slavery. Even if we hadn't had a chance to plan as a group (IC or OOC) beforehand I knew that they weren't going to place my character's life in extra danger just for lols.

We all get a chance to be heard at the table. But all the plans in the world don't matter when this guy's character walks away in the middle of the planning and does his own thing (generally start trouble). Or he has a backstory that says he is in charge so when he and I disagree his plan is always the one that happens.

And this isn't one character. He's made 4 in a row like this.

Horseshoe

Kistra wrote: »

We all get a chance to be heard at the table. But all the plans in the world don't matter when this guy's character walks away in the middle of the planning and does his own thing (generally start trouble). Or he has a backstory that says he is in charge so when he and I disagree his plan is always the one that happens.

And this isn't one character. He's made 4 in a row like this.

Dang.

This doesn't sound like an "annoying character" problem.

This sounds like a player problem.

I mean, for all I know, this may be a guy who is perfectly cool away from the table.

But those last couple of sentances sound like he makes characters this way, whether or not he realizes that such a character can make problems.

fadingathedges

Sell him into slavery



Or maybe his character. :P

HamHamJ

Kistra wrote: »

And I didn't care when Zed or one of the other characters took turns selling me into slavery. Even if we hadn't had a chance to plan as a group (IC or OOC) beforehand I knew that they weren't going to place my character's life in extra danger just for lols.

We all get a chance to be heard at the table. But all the plans in the world don't matter when this guy's character walks away in the middle of the planning and does his own thing (generally start trouble). Or he has a backstory that says he is in charge so when he and I disagree his plan is always the one that happens.

And this isn't one character. He's made 4 in a row like this.

I would just let him get himself killed.

Or in the later case, arrange a mutiny.

Terrendos

Also, your next character should specifically state that (s)he is that player character's boss. (S)he was brought in for this because of the other guy's general gross incompetence.

Maybe you shouldn't phrase it like that though?

HeavyVillain

I can totaly sympathise with kistra here, something really similar used to happen wit our games (and it didnt help that my groups first GM wa sa bit of a jerk himself).

I asked the DM how i should be handling it, as a sort of way of pointing out i had a problem with the behaviour, and then got confirmation that I could basically give him whatever he gave us without repercusion

This guy made two party kills by constantly being an impuslive assbafg character, and constantly ruined our rep (in one instance he got us all killed really far along in a campaign by attacking the superpowered NPC whod been giving us missions)

So... next time he started being a dick to an important diplomat i backstabbed him with a hypo full of sedative and we all dragged him off discretly

(He failed a bunch of checks so he was out for hours. He woke up in our cargobay to find himself without pants and missing his robotic eye.)

After that he began making less dickheadish characters :P

So yeah, if hes being disruptive, give him what he deserves

OptimusZed

She's got a follower. He usually carries her arsenal, but all she's got to do is give him a stun baton. Let the minion knock the jerk unconscious just once to let him know it's a possibility. He is seriously the least combat capable Saga character I've ever seen, the porter slave could totally take him. It would be worth it just for the expression on his face.

The Ender

I'm with Zed. Annihilate him (but do it with a smile on your face!).

No, seriously. If he wants to try and justify being a dick by shrugging and saying, "Hey, I'm just being in character," then you should be able to justify atomizing his ass for the same reason.