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Why the fuck aren't you playing Vanquish

LednehLedneh shinesquawkRegistered User regular
edited November 2010 in Social Entropy++
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Vanquish is a game for the 360 and PS3, it has a demo, and it is awesome

It has been called a cover shooter like gears of war but that's like calling fucking delicious mother-made chocolate chip cookies 'kinda nice'

It's more like what happens when Gears of War meets Bayonetta meets God Hand and they have the sexiest threesome ever

VANQUISH_009.jpg

Apparently there's a plot or something, russians laser'd san fran and are gonna do the same to new york and you gotta go to their satellite to stop them? I guess? Who fucking cares

We got ten different weapons each with unique melee attacks and all hugely upgradable, grenades, and the sort of bullshit fucking pirouettes that make a Metal Gear Solid cinematic look fucking low budget

vanquish-first-screens.jpg

Bullet-time? Yeah. Rocket-assisted knee slides? Oh yeah. Shooting during said knee slides? Yep. Knee sliding past five robots, shotgunning them all in bullet time as you go past, then flipkicking a sixth on the way out?!

Got that too, and it ain't no fucking QTE

vanquishexplosion.jpg

Watch this fucker play the demo level and actually kinda suck but still look fucking awesome
did you see that explosion jesus chris

Now watch THIS japanese fucker completely and utterly dominate another demo level
so many dead russian robots

But Ledneh I didn't even know this existed! Yeah, because Sega are the worst advertisers in all of recorded goddamned history and apparently don't want their genuinely awesome games to sell, I don't fucking know! That and they released it at the same time as fucking New Vegas! So I guess THAT might be why you haven't played it yet!

BUT NOW YOU HAVE NO EXCUSE*
*unless you're a silly goose like senoramor and don't have either system



Seriously I've heard hardly anyone around here so much as mention this game, and that makes me immensely sad, because it's quite possibly the best action game I've seen all year.

Give it a try!

Ledneh on
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Posts

  • Macro9Macro9 Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I might rent this after I finish with New Vegas.

    Although Dragon Age 2 will probably be out by then

    SO who knows man

    Macro9 on
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  • DichotomyDichotomy Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    downloading the demo
    right
    now

    Dichotomy on
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  • Baroque And RollBaroque And Roll Every spark of friendship and love Will die without a homeRegistered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I can't justify paying $60 for this game with my current finances.

    Baroque And Roll on
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    SteamID: Baroque And Roll
  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    This game I thought would be fun.

    I played the demo and it was too hard.

    Uriel on
  • Baroque And RollBaroque And Roll Every spark of friendship and love Will die without a homeRegistered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Uriel wrote: »
    This game I thought would be fun.

    I played the demo and it was too hard.

    Dammit Uriel

    This is awful.

    Stop being awful.

    Baroque And Roll on
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    SteamID: Baroque And Roll
  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Baroque And Roll wrote: »
    Uriel wrote: »
    This game I thought would be fun.

    I played the demo and it was too hard.

    Dammit Uriel

    This is awful.

    Stop being awful.

    I died like four times in the demo and went "fuck it"

    Uriel on
  • DichotomyDichotomy Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I'm not as fluid with this as I would like

    the robot in the demo did give me boners though

    Dichotomy on
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  • Baroque And RollBaroque And Roll Every spark of friendship and love Will die without a homeRegistered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Uriel wrote: »
    Baroque And Roll wrote: »
    Uriel wrote: »
    This game I thought would be fun.

    I played the demo and it was too hard.

    Dammit Uriel

    This is awful.

    Stop being awful.

    I died like four times in the demo and went "fuck it"

    Then stop sucking.

    Baroque And Roll on
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    SteamID: Baroque And Roll
  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Stop sucking in a fifteen minute demo with a 1 minute tutorial set in a level probably an hour into the game...?

    Sure I'll work on that.

    Uriel on
  • MugginsMuggins Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Uriel stop being bad

    Muggins on
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    hey satan...: thinkgeek amazon My post |
  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Veretas make me some chicken.

    Uriel on
  • FrankoFranko Sometimes I really wish I had four feet so I could dance with myself to the drumbeat Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    played the demo, p sick

    Franko on
  • YukiraYukira Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Oh.

    My.

    God.

    Yukira on
  • PeenPeen Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    This game looks really good but I've heard it's a little short and I can't see spending full price on it. I'll probably get it when it's cheaper in a few months after everyone's finished forgetting about it.

    Peen on
  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Can anyone tell me why I have a blue dot in the webcomic thread?

    Uriel on
  • LednehLedneh shinesquawk Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Uriel wrote: »
    Stop sucking in a fifteen minute demo with a 1 minute tutorial set in a level probably an hour into the game...?

    Sure I'll work on that.

    It is like the second level five to ten minutes in! QUIT BEING A SILLY GOOSE URIEL!!

    (edit) that being said, yes this is a game that can and will kick your shit in if you're not paying attention)

    Ledneh on
  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I'm seriously the only one who died four times in the demo level and got frustrated?

    Uriel on
  • LednehLedneh shinesquawk Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Peen wrote: »
    This game looks really good but I've heard it's a little short and I can't see spending full price on it. I'll probably get it when it's cheaper in a few months after everyone's finished forgetting about it.
    That "short" thing is a damned dirty lie that the internet has spread. Yes, it's six-eight hours long... if you skip all the challenges. And never die. And buzzsaw every level. And never replay a level.

    You will not do any of these

    Ledneh on
  • MugginsMuggins Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    6-8 hours is a good length

    Muggins on
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    hey satan...: thinkgeek amazon My post |
  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Veretas wrote: »
    6-8 hours is a good length

    also good in inches.

    Uriel on
  • I Win SwordfightsI Win Swordfights all the traits of greatness starlight at my feetRegistered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I made this thread

    I was so excited for it

    Blockbuster didn't get it

    Or Castlevania :(

    I Win Swordfights on
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  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Blockbuster is still in business?

    Uriel on
  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS regular
    edited October 2010
    because i can't afford it

    Kusuguttai on
  • WrenWren ninja_bird Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    6-8 hours but supposed to have great replayability

    Wren on
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    TF2 - Wren BF3: Wren-fu
  • SeñorAmorSeñorAmor !!! Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Ledneh wrote: »
    BUT NOW YOU HAVE NO EXCUSE

    I have neither a 360 nor a PS3.

    I have an excuse, neener neener.

    SeñorAmor on
  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I would play this game

    but I gotta finish new vegas

    and I got Final Fantasy XIII for nine dollars so I guess I should play that too

    The Lovely Bastard on
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  • YukiraYukira Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Aaah, I got my ass kicked by the robot in the demo.

    I LOVE IT.

    Gettin' this after the move!

    Yukira on
  • I Win SwordfightsI Win Swordfights all the traits of greatness starlight at my feetRegistered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I need to beat Fable III and The Force Unleashed

    and buy Wrath of the Lich King and Cataclysm

    But after that

    I will buy this from the bargain bin

    I Win Swordfights on
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  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Uriel wrote: »
    I'm seriously the only one who died four times in the demo level and got frustrated?

    I died five times through the entire demo?

    Blake T on
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    Satans..... hints.....
  • PeenPeen Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Ledneh wrote: »
    Peen wrote: »
    This game looks really good but I've heard it's a little short and I can't see spending full price on it. I'll probably get it when it's cheaper in a few months after everyone's finished forgetting about it.
    That "short" thing is a damned dirty lie that the internet has spread. Yes, it's six-eight hours long... if you skip all the challenges. And never die. And buzzsaw every level. And never replay a level.

    You will not do any of these

    Ohhh, so it's the reviewer "6-8" hour special. I hate it when they say how long a game takes in a review when it was only that long for them because of how they had to play it. Maybe I'll look into this after all.

    Peen on
  • LednehLedneh shinesquawk Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Believe me, if nothing else this thing shits replayability

    Ledneh on
  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I mean I'm not trying to be mean to the game but the only real difference to GoW is that sliding everywhere is faster than roadie running and it has some bullet time.

    It was OK but not supergreat.

    Plus it's a Japanese story line and they very rarely grab me.

    Blake T on
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    Satans..... hints.....
  • MugginsMuggins Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Blake you must have hated Bayonetta

    Muggins on
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    hey satan...: thinkgeek amazon My post |
  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Nah Bayonetta was really fun. And the story was so stupid it did full circle and passed from stupid to mildly entertaining despite the fact that I didn't know what the fuck was ever going on.

    The way this game was intially pitches though was there was a billion different ways to kill dudes.

    And it isn't, it's a cover shooter with a fast way to run.

    Which is kinda fun, but I was hoping for a bit more.

    Blake T on
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    Satans..... hints.....
  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    man I think I am the only person alive who played the bayonetta demo, put it down, and said "no thanks"

    it was not a thing I enjoyed

    The Lovely Bastard on
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  • DichotomyDichotomy Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    nah, I didn't really care for it either

    Dichotomy on
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  • YaYaYaYa Decent. Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    TLB how could you not like Bayonetta

    it is a game based entirely around tits and shooting things

    oh and you punch god into the sun at the end

    YaYa on
  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I didn't like the camera!

    I could barely see the dang character at times

    The Lovely Bastard on
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  • LednehLedneh shinesquawk Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    YaYa wrote: »
    TLB how could you not like Bayonetta

    it is a game based entirely around tits and shooting things

    oh and you punch god into the sun at the end

    Damnit now I need to go play the last couple levels of Bayonetta again

    Ledneh on
  • TonkkaTonkka Some one in the club tonight Has stolen my ideas.Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I don't have any fucking money.

    How is that for an excuse?

    Tonkka on
    Steam: evilumpire Battle.net: T0NKKA#1588 PS4: T_0_N_N_K_A Twitter Shirts and such HELP!
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