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Haiku? Gesundheit!

Darth WaiterDarth Waiter Elrond HubbardMordor XenuRegistered User regular
edited November 2010 in Social Entropy++
So, there's this thing called haiku that folks like to do ... stuff ... with.

Well, nevermind that nonsense, we're doing something new and advanced. It's like poetry, but without all of the pretentious behavior that makes your Literature class so unbearable. We are talking about some next-level-shit right here.

You don't wanna be a part of it? Fine. No one wants your antiquated ideas.

We're progressive and smart here.

We have smart and progressive people, people who like humor, people that will not bow to conformity, but pay homage to the simple metric of 5-7-5.

I will begin:

Breakfast at McDonalds

Boiling hot hash browns,
Scalding the back of my throat,
Cool juice is relief

Emergency Thoughts

Saw a bad driver,
Reckless, Erratic, Unsafe
He must need to poo

A Sign for Martial Arts Edutainment

Jiu-Juitsu is weird,
Rolling around with bald men,
Just like your mom does

Pondering the S&M Dilema

Pain is ecstasy
Steel clamps on my naughty bits
It must be Tuesday

Holiday Decorator at Work

She juggles red balls
She juggles bigger red balls
I watch too much porn

Ode to the Strip Club

The voices, they say
"Youse a fine muthafucka!"
I think they are right

Darth Waiter on
«134

Posts

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    YaYaYaYa Decent. Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Haikus are poems
    that might not make sense
    refrigerator

    YaYa on
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    #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    YaYa wrote: »
    Haikus are easy
    but sometimes they don't make sense
    refrigerator

    #pipe on
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    YaYaYaYa Decent. Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    fuck I counted wrong

    go away I've been at work for like 9 hours and it's been busy and

    yeah I'mma kill myself

    YaYa is shamed
    he cannot count syllables
    and now he must die

    YaYa on
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    HacksawHacksaw J. Duggan Esq. Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Today's my birthday
    It's snowing outside right now
    I can't leave the house

    Hacksaw on
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    CrashmoCrashmo Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Here's a fun flash game
    Where you make your own haiku
    It's Haiku Hero!

    Crashmo on
    polar-bearsig.jpg
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    facetiousfacetious a wit so dry it shits sandRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    "Haiku" is plural;
    it pains me tremendously
    when that mistake's made.

    facetious on
    "I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
    Real strong, facetious.

    Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
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    #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    facetious wrote: »
    "Haiku" is plural;
    it pains me tremendously
    when that mistake's made.

    get over it

    #pipe on
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    Darth WaiterDarth Waiter Elrond Hubbard Mordor XenuRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Just gonna get this out of the way before bed:

    Darth Waiter Sucks Some Big Donkey Dick

    This thread lacks content
    For reals, this thread lacks content
    This thread lacks content

    Good night, internets; may flights of men's assholes wing you to your rest.

    Darth Waiter on
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    MereHappenstanceMereHappenstance Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    I'll have a go at it.

    Crawling in my skin
    These wounds they will not heal
    Fear is how I fall

    MereHappenstance on
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    YaYaYaYa Decent. Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    why would assholes have wings

    YaYa on
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    CrashmoCrashmo Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    That never happened
    You are dumb and a buttsmith
    How you like me now

    Crashmo on
    polar-bearsig.jpg
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    facetiousfacetious a wit so dry it shits sandRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    #pipe wrote: »
    facetious wrote: »
    "Haiku" is plural;
    it pains me tremendously
    when that mistake's made.

    get over it

    It's an affliction!
    I can't turn off pedantry.
    I apologise.

    facetious on
    "I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
    Real strong, facetious.

    Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
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    CrashmoCrashmo Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    I'll have a go at it.

    Crawling in my skin
    These wounds they will not heal
    Fear is how I fall

    oh my lordy

    Crashmo on
    polar-bearsig.jpg
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    GeoMitchGeoMitch Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Holla
    Holla
    Get dollas

    GeoMitch on
    Gamertag: GeoMtch Steam Google+
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    FutoreFutore Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Is he a midget?
    Perhaps just barely.
    He is a smidget.

    Futore on
    ETqXK.png
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    bsjezzbsjezz Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    haiku is such a fucking waste of English

    bsjezz on
    sC4Q4nq.jpg
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    GeoMitchGeoMitch Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    there once was a man from nantucket
    whose dick was so long he could suck it

    GeoMitch on
    Gamertag: GeoMtch Steam Google+
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    MereHappenstanceMereHappenstance Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    A day in the life of a bro.

    College football sundays
    hand me another beer bro
    want to shotgun it?

    MereHappenstance on
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    CrashmoCrashmo Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    now you're breaking into limerick

    Crashmo on
    polar-bearsig.jpg
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    FletcherFletcher Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    like cherry blossoms
    but more veiny and throbbing
    dongs soar in the breeze

    Fletcher on
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    facetiousfacetious a wit so dry it shits sandRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    This is a haiku.
    This line, seven syllables.
    And on this line, five.

    facetious on
    "I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
    Real strong, facetious.

    Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
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    IsoldaeIsoldae Hats Off To JigglypuffRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Fletcher wrote: »
    like cherry blossoms
    but more veiny and throbbing
    dongs soar in the breeze

    Shut it down.

    Isoldae on
    xet8c.gif
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    MereHappenstanceMereHappenstance Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    The bane of my life
    being teabagged constantly
    my reality

    MereHappenstance on
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    VerdigrisVerdigris Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Feel bad for you, son
    I got ninety-nine problems
    But a bitch ain't one

    Verdigris on
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    FletcherFletcher Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    oh shit the police
    quick, hide the smuggled cacti
    cram them in my butt

    Fletcher on
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    HacksawHacksaw J. Duggan Esq. Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Wind assaults my face
    Oh my fucking god it's cold
    Why am I outside?

    Hacksaw on
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    IsoldaeIsoldae Hats Off To JigglypuffRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    You can't not make that an antics now.

    Isoldae on
    xet8c.gif
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    DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited November 2010
    bsjezz wrote: »
    haiku is such a fucking waste of English

    :v:

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
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    Captain KCaptain K Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    I love haiku threads
    posting happens very fast
    TAKE IT TO THE MOON

    Captain K on
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    The GeekThe Geek Oh-Two Crew, Omeganaut Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited November 2010
    I am so sorry!
    Something struck me in the rear.
    I just... wound up... here?

    The Geek on
    BLM - ACAB
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    Captain KCaptain K Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    A wild Geek appears!
    Captain K used HAIKU POST
    Super effective!


    heh had to edit that

    Captain K on
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    FutoreFutore Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Tales of Ba Sing Se
    Saddest episode ever
    Stupid dead Mako

    Futore on
    ETqXK.png
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    The GeekThe Geek Oh-Two Crew, Omeganaut Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited November 2010
    You think you're so smart
    with your fancy little words
    this is not so hard.

    The Geek on
    BLM - ACAB
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    #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Druhim wrote: »
    bsjezz wrote: »
    haiku is such a fucking waste of English

    :v:

    I'm inclined to agree

    #pipe on
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    DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited November 2010
    Generally when people are hating on haikus, it's because they're sick of everyone making bad haikus. But that's not the fault of the form. Haikus can be quite profound. But most people don't care to put that much thought into it and blame the form rather than the creator(s) of the myriad of low quality haikus. But even then, isn't it great that it's both so accessible as well as having so much potential? The potential beauty of haiku is that it forces one to refine an idea, a feeling, a time or place into a very limited number of syllables. Which is hard to do well, but when it is done well it's all the more powerful.

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
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    FutoreFutore Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Druhim wrote: »
    Generally when people are hating on haikus, it's because they're sick of everyone making bad haikus. But that's not the fault of the form. Haikus can be quite profound. But most people don't care to put that much thought into it and blame the form rather than the creator(s) of the myriad of low quality haikus. But even then, isn't it great that it's both so accessible as well as having so much potential? The potential beauty of haiku is that it forces one to refine an idea, a feeling, a time or place into a very limited number of syllables. Which is hard to do well, but when it is done well it's all the more powerful.

    this one I wrote and submitted in high school for my poetry class
    Futore wrote: »
    Is he a midget?
    Perhaps just barely.
    He is a smidget.

    Futore on
    ETqXK.png
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    Captain KCaptain K Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Druhim is profound
    I am not quite as profound
    case in point: this post

    Captain K on
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    #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Druhim wrote: »
    Generally when people are hating on haikus, it's because they're sick of everyone making bad haikus. But that's not the fault of the form. Haikus can be quite profound. But most people don't care to put that much thought into it and blame the form rather than the creator(s) of the myriad of low quality haikus. But even then, isn't it great that it's both so accessible as well as having so much potential? The potential beauty of haiku is that it forces one to refine an idea, a feeling, a time or place into a very limited number of syllables. Which is hard to do well, but when it is done well it's all the more powerful.

    yeah you're right.

    In my entire life, I think I've read maybe 3 haiku that were reaching that potential

    and easily hundreds of awful ones

    #pipe on
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    GeoMitchGeoMitch Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    i think i've read about
    20ish haikus in my lifetime
    i forgot all of them

    GeoMitch on
    Gamertag: GeoMtch Steam Google+
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    Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Druhim loves haiku
    bsjezz finds them lacking
    and now, fisticuffs

    Lost Salient on
    RUVCwyu.jpg
    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
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