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Study abroad making me miserable
Hank_Scorpio
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
I'm almost 2 weeks into a study abroad program in Salamanca, Spain. I guess I was naive coming into it, but I thought it would be great. The reality is that I'm not happy most of the time. I'm trying my hardest to learn Spanish and making decent progress, but I'm only in Spanish 101 and daily tasks are a chore because of the language barrier. When this thing started, I had two roommates. One of them got kicked out of the apartment for being an idiot and a nuisance, and now the other has basically moved out to be with a bigger group of guys. Me and him were getting along great and went out together a lot, he knew a lot of Spanish, so things were working. But now he's gone and I'm alone and not getting invited to outings unless I call my former roommate and basically pester him (which I loathe doing).
My classes aside from Spanish 101 are Psych 101 and Art History. Art History is nice, but even if I loved all my classes the experience would still be an annoying one. Does anyone have any tips on what I could do to make things better? I'm naturally a pretty independent person and I would be going out to go hiking and do things like that, but the program I'm with has me doing group activites constantly, aside from regular classes. And along with the language barrier, I feel like I'm trapped until April 29th when I go home.
My classes aside from Spanish 101 are Psych 101 and Art History. Art History is nice, but even if I loved all my classes the experience would still be an annoying one. Does anyone have any tips on what I could do to make things better? I'm naturally a pretty independent person and I would be going out to go hiking and do things like that, but the program I'm with has me doing group activites constantly, aside from regular classes. And along with the language barrier, I feel like I'm trapped until April 29th when I go home.
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Maybe you should try reaching out to the people in your group activities, see if they're doing anything interesting and wouldn't mind having another person along.
Any reason you studied abroad without really knowing the language of where you were?
It sounds a lot like your expectations was to go out do things and have a good time.
Study abroad doesnt set that up for you, thats what happens WHILE you're studying abroad.
Join a tour group. It will give you the experience you were originally looking for.
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A lot of the time, they'll have a website or some kind of forum where they interact on. Find that!
I'm going to France next Fall for four months, but that program required me to have two years of college level French and I'll be studying at a foreign language institute learning French intensively rather than taking "class classes". I'll be coming back to the States with a ton of credits still though.
Funnily enough, even after doing this for a few years, all my friends in Brisbane are other Canadians. The earlier advice about finding other expats is good advice.
How much is the OP there for language immersion? If you're there to learn the language, hanging out with other English speakers is a bad, bad idea.
When I go to France in the Fall the only time I plan on spending with my classmates is in class. I'm making French friends ASAP and spending my free time with them.
Also, if you can find some expats or English speakers to hang with that will help just give you some comfort. A town of that size should have a few cafes or pubs where they hang, so maybe go there.
I wouldn't be too worried about people telling you to suck it up and not want to be with people who speak your language etc. Just ignore them. They might well have done it before and love it, but it isn't for everyone. I often go to Europe for weeks at a time and it is pretty hard not to be able to speak fluently to people. I enjoy it, but since I am back in London soon enough it isn't a problem
Just so you know, there's a giant difference between a vacation and a study abroad program.
Interesting comment and thanks for the input
In regards to the intent of being there. Hanging out and speaking English all day with other students is not the purpose of being there. You're supposed to be learning the language and soaking up the culture. Looking at his class load he could easily be doing that at his home university and not spending however much more this is costing him.
Right, well your explanation is better and I do admit my response was a little snide, sorry.
Anyway, I see your point, but on the other hand, if hanging out with English speakers regularly is what he needs to do in order to not hate his time there, or go home early then I think he should do that. Some people either can't handle total immersion, or it takes a while to get used to it and it would suck if he threw it all away after a couple of weeks if there was a half way house option
That's part of why I'm kicking myself over the whole thing. I thought it would be a grand experience but instead it's just mostly frustrating, and I feel like an idiot for burning 3 or 4 grand just to take classes here I could have taken back home. I'm trying to make the most of it but I end up generally being unhappy and regretful at the end of the day. In the end though this isn't a waste even if I go home early, I now know what it's like to live completely on my own in a foreign country. And I didn't lose nearly as much money as I could have, as this is way way cheaper than UC study abroad programs.
Why don't you just do something crazy like going to a local bar and trying to meet local girls, or wandering the streets, or attending a local religious service (if you are religious) or watching a play or something. Just so you have more fun memories of your time than sitting in a dorm room feeling lonely. You don't need to worry about looking a fool if you've only got 8 weeks in the area.
Go see the sights. Salamanca is a renaissance city renowned for it's beautiful architecture.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/spanish-tourist-board/salamanca-spain-university-town
I've seen more of China than all of my Chinese students. And I have close to 300 students this semester. It also makes you appreciate your home (in Spain) so much more. Leave, see something awesome and come back refreshed and with a broader perspective.
You've basically got to be able to have fun with the daily struggle you encounter at first, and take every opportunity to not only learn new words, but really listen to the sounds of words being spoken around you. As someone without real familiarity of the language to start with, you're going to have to go home every day and study your ass off for awhile. Really soak up everything you can in class, as well. Watch TV and movies in Spanish with subtitles, and look for patterns. That last one has always been a huge help to me.
Don't quit now. Make Spanish friends as soon as you can. The thing is, if you really work at it and do it right, in two months you'll look back at this and smile at how you couldn't do something so simple.
Good luck with that, but sometimes it isn't that easy. Meeting locals can be tough and it certainly isn't as automatic as "making friends ASAP".
OP, join that hiking club ASAP and go on the next trip. Find a tour company that leaves from your school for weekend trips and go on it. Find the 'international students club' or whatever your uni has and join that. Go to a sports event and ask someone beside you for help understanding it (even if you do understand it, ask something like that as an icebreaker). It seems tough but you have to force yourself to do these things, it won't come to you.
Everyone telling you to go and make friends - they don't realise how much effort that can seem when you're feeling alone and down in a foreign place. It's not easy, but do try. You'll realise how much you appreciate social interactions when you can get them, be it in your classes or with that hiking group you're thinking about.
Someone else mentioned travel - do this! You're only there for a finite amount of time so make the most of it. The best times I've had this exchange have been travelling to other places in Canada. Trust me - you don't want to come back from this experience feeling like you wasted your time and your money. You say you're independent, so go out and just walk around the city. Sit in coffee shops, people watch, listen to conversations.. try and gain at least an appreciation for another culture, even if you can't bring yourself to completely immerse.
Obviously, if it gets really bad, talk to somebody. You can even PM me if you like and I can attempt to share more coping strategies! You don't have long to go, so chin up
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
When you first go to a foreign place where you don't speak the language and hardly know anybody, the first few weeks you are so hopped up on adrenaline and ADVENTURE! that you don't notice how foreign the place is and how far away from home you are.
Once that starts wearing off, is when the "shock" part of "culture shock" sets in: feeling of panic and depression and inadequacy, as though you are unequal to the task of living in this strange place, and all you want is something familiar and not foreign. Sound about right?
Don't worry. This is perfectly normal.
Keep working on your language skills, take in some sun and some sights, make friends with the Spanish students at the school. In a few weeks the panic and feelings of inadequacy will pass, and you will achieve equilibrium and start having fun. You will get excited again, and enthusiastic about what an ADVENTURE! this is, and then the depression will hit again, probably with less intensity, and you'll get over it, same as before.
Lather, rinse, repeat. As I said, this is perfectly normal. It a recognizable cycle that your guidance counselor should have told you about before you ever left your home country. It's not a reason to give up.
It might help to find a native speaker who can teach you a skill - if you were in Japan, I would suggest karate, or tea ceremony. For Spain though... Flamenco? Guitar? Flamenco guitar?
Listen to the advice of the others in the thread. They've got good suggestions.