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Jobs, Apartments, Girlfriends. rock and a hard place
MrFish
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
Fairly long but any help would be appreciated.... thanks
Me and my girlfriend have been together a little over 6 months. We have been generally very happy together, small things here and there but I think that comes with every couple. Anyhow, when we first started dating I was living and working extremely close to her work and her (parents’) house. She is 27 and still lives with her parents, but this is fairly normal for Thailand I think. She has tried to move out before but says that her parents “won’t let her”, basically making her feel like shit for wanting to move on and telling her to keep a low paying job closer to home instead of something better paying further away.
So, things were good for about 5 months. At the end of April, I started a new job on the other side of Bangkok (about 1-1.5 hours away). This job pays significantly less, but is really more of an internship and will (hopefully) lead to better things in a field I like (rather than teaching English, which was my old job and I was miserable). For the first month, I was still in my original apartment, and would spend around 2.5-3 hours everyday commuting, by mass transit. Office hours are 9-6 and by the time I got home and took a shower it was basically 8pm.
At the end of May, the lease on my apartment expired, and I got a job petsitting for a family friend in the city. I was able to stay in their apartment, which was much closer to my work. They are returning tonight, and this is where things get complicated.
My parents also have an apartment here, also fairly close to my work, and considering my pay I think the only reasonable option is to move in with them. It is conceivable that I might be able to survive on my salary, but it seems highly unlikely and if I did I would be saving absolutely nothing. So, with the option to live rent-free with my parents seems to me the most sensible thing, but my girlfriend is freaking out about it, because we will not be able to be together nearly as often as we have been in the past. She has found a fairly cheap apartment back in the old area I used to live in. It might be possible to make it, but even then barely so and my quality of life would suck.
Better to lose money/barely scrape by living on one’s own, with a brutal commute, or the setback of moving back in with the parents for two months (with a concrete plan of moving out in two months at the conclusion of the internship), and save money for a new apartment later? If it makes any difference, I am 21.
Me and my girlfriend have been together a little over 6 months. We have been generally very happy together, small things here and there but I think that comes with every couple. Anyhow, when we first started dating I was living and working extremely close to her work and her (parents’) house. She is 27 and still lives with her parents, but this is fairly normal for Thailand I think. She has tried to move out before but says that her parents “won’t let her”, basically making her feel like shit for wanting to move on and telling her to keep a low paying job closer to home instead of something better paying further away.
So, things were good for about 5 months. At the end of April, I started a new job on the other side of Bangkok (about 1-1.5 hours away). This job pays significantly less, but is really more of an internship and will (hopefully) lead to better things in a field I like (rather than teaching English, which was my old job and I was miserable). For the first month, I was still in my original apartment, and would spend around 2.5-3 hours everyday commuting, by mass transit. Office hours are 9-6 and by the time I got home and took a shower it was basically 8pm.
At the end of May, the lease on my apartment expired, and I got a job petsitting for a family friend in the city. I was able to stay in their apartment, which was much closer to my work. They are returning tonight, and this is where things get complicated.
My parents also have an apartment here, also fairly close to my work, and considering my pay I think the only reasonable option is to move in with them. It is conceivable that I might be able to survive on my salary, but it seems highly unlikely and if I did I would be saving absolutely nothing. So, with the option to live rent-free with my parents seems to me the most sensible thing, but my girlfriend is freaking out about it, because we will not be able to be together nearly as often as we have been in the past. She has found a fairly cheap apartment back in the old area I used to live in. It might be possible to make it, but even then barely so and my quality of life would suck.
Better to lose money/barely scrape by living on one’s own, with a brutal commute, or the setback of moving back in with the parents for two months (with a concrete plan of moving out in two months at the conclusion of the internship), and save money for a new apartment later? If it makes any difference, I am 21.
MrFish on
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Bangkok is relatively cheap, as I'm sure you know, and if you want to you can live there for not very much at all. If it were me I would stay at home the 2 months and go out with my girlfriend frequently.
My office hours are the same as yours, and my total commute for the day is 4 hours, so I feel your pain.
Check out my art! Buy some prints!
Your girlfriend needs to stop being selfish.
Move back in with your parents and save up six months of living expenses in case you lose your job.
thanks for all the replies!