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$22 billions worth of unguarded treasures? Let's steal this shit.

ShanadeusShanadeus Registered User regular
edited July 2011 in Social Entropy++
http://www.cbc.ca/news/world/story/2011/07/04/india-temple-jewels.html
A vast treasure trove of gold coins, jewels and precious stones unearthed at a lightly guarded Hindu temple in India was expected to grow further in value Monday as the last two secret vaults sealed for nearly 150 years are opened.

Four vaults recently opened at the temple in Trivandrum, the capital of the southern state of Kerala, held a vast bounty that unofficial estimates peg at $22 billion US.

The treasures unearthed so far include statues of gods and goddesses made of solid gold and studded with diamonds, rubies, emeralds and other precious stones, crowns and necklaces, all given as gifts to the temple over the centuries.

Just throwing out a couple of ideas:

Infiltration

Gain entrance into their religious order and advance in the hierarchy until you get the privilege of worshipping the treasure in private - then smuggle a 1,000-10,000th part of the treasure out ($22,000,000-$220,000,000 divided up between roughly 7-8 people aiding you in rising in their monk order, smugglers, etc) that will be transported to the coast where they'll be smuggled abroad with the aid of an officially retired Soviet submarine under the command of a Russian general (%30 cut).

Direct attack&Diversion

Use $70,000-$80,000 to equip Muslims and other religious minority fundamentalists with cheap weaponry, with some appropriate reason appealing to their religious/minority separatist mindset. This group serve as a diversion and will occupy local police and/or military some distance away from the temple for the half dozen hours they'll manage to hold their ground.

Pay $20,000 to a mercenary group (preferably eastern European) along with the promise of a 10% cut of the treasure, who will directly attack the temple and retrieve the majority of the treasure that will be transported to the coast where they'll be smuggled abroad with the aid of an officially retired Soviet submarine under the command of a Russian general (%30 cut).
____

Any other ideas?

Shanadeus on
«1

Posts

  • ShanadeusShanadeus Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Target:

    li-620-temple-rtr2oeuu.jpg

    Shanadeus on
  • HellaJeffHellaJeff FAB FRESH RAIIINBOOWWWWWRegistered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Or you could respect this incredible historical monument with vast cultural value

    HellaJeff on
  • SeriouslySeriously Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Fuck that I'm going in

    you suckers sit right there and keep planning

    Seriously on
  • CampionCampion Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    That is a lot of guards, I think your information may be spotty.

    Campion on
    4484-7718-8470
  • AshcroftAshcroft LOL The PayloadRegistered User regular
    edited July 2011
    This belongs in a museum.

    Ashcroft on
    ZD98Zka.png
  • ShanadeusShanadeus Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Campion wrote: »
    That is a lot of guards, I think your information may be spotty.

    They are just civilians, they might serve as another distraction if riled up - not everyone is happy about how the wealth is distributed at the moment.

    Shanadeus on
  • Typhoid MannyTyphoid Manny Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    SO DO YOU

    Typhoid Manny on
    from each according to his ability, to each according to his need
    hitting hot metal with hammers
  • Sweeney TomSweeney Tom Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Who are you

    Who who who whooooooo

    Sweeney Tom on
  • CampionCampion Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Shanadeus wrote: »
    Campion wrote: »
    That is a lot of guards, I think your information may be spotty.

    They are just civilians, they might serve as another distraction if riled up - not everyone is happy about how the wealth is distributed at the moment.

    I don't remember a Robin Hood situation in your proposal

    Campion on
    4484-7718-8470
  • ShanadeusShanadeus Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Campion wrote: »
    Shanadeus wrote: »
    Campion wrote: »
    That is a lot of guards, I think your information may be spotty.

    They are just civilians, they might serve as another distraction if riled up - not everyone is happy about how the wealth is distributed at the moment.

    I don't remember a Robin Hood situation in your proposal

    We'll toss them a million or two for good will and fake a submarine failure that'll convince the rest of the world that the remaining treasure is lost in the ocean.

    Shanadeus on
  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    oh man, this sounds awesome

    the treasure part, not the stealing part

    I want pictures, and archaeologists' research and opinions on everything that's in there

    Indie Winter on
    wY6K6Jb.gif
  • ShanadeusShanadeus Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    oh man, this sounds awesome

    the treasure part, not the stealing part

    I want pictures, and archaeologists' research and opinions on everything that's in there

    Solid gold statues studded with diamonds.

    Shanadeus on
  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    but what do they mean?

    Indie Winter on
    wY6K6Jb.gif
  • Muse Among MenMuse Among Men Suburban Bunny Princess? Its time for a new shtick Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Ashcroft wrote: »
    This belongs in a museum.

    This should be a museum

    Muse Among Men on
  • UnbrokenEvaUnbrokenEva HIGH ON THE WIRE BUT I WON'T TRIP ITRegistered User regular
    edited July 2011
    This belongs in a museum.

    UnbrokenEva on
  • ZoelZoel I suppose... I'd put it on Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    i feel uncomfortable with using forums to orchestrate jewel heists and question the competence of any criminal mastermind that might do so

    Zoel on
    A magician gives you a ring that, when worn, will let you see the world as it truly is.
    However, the ring will never leave your finger, and you will be unable to ever describe to another living person what you see.
  • BerkBerk THE BUDGIE SMUGGLER Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    337659783.jpg

    Berk on
    sig-1.jpg
  • ShanadeusShanadeus Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    but what do they mean?

    A nice mansion and luxury for a couple of lifetimes.

    Was probably the hobby of some rich dude back in the day who had no idea what to do with all his wealth, tributing his Gods, impressing his peers, and using up all the gold he had lying around in one fell swoop.

    Shanadeus on
  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    what would zizek do with all that money anyway

    invest it all in radical beard technology

    Indie Winter on
    wY6K6Jb.gif
  • Sweeney TomSweeney Tom Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Berk wrote: »
    337659783.jpg

    God, I love Zizek

    Sweeney Tom on
  • BerkBerk THE BUDGIE SMUGGLER Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Koshian wrote: »
    Berk wrote: »
    337659783.jpg

    PJvNb.jpg

    8ofN8.gif

    Berk on
    sig-1.jpg
  • CampionCampion Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Zoel wrote: »
    i feel uncomfortable with using forums to orchestrate jewel heists and question the competence of any criminal mastermind that might do so

    Once we are rich as kings, our past actions will have no consequences. We will have a new life free of the pressures and constraints that this world brings us.

    Campion on
    4484-7718-8470
  • TankHammerTankHammer Atlanta Ghostbuster Atlanta, GARegistered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Just so long as you have a plan to get by the temple's six-armed guardian statue I'm fine.

    TankHammer on
  • BerkBerk THE BUDGIE SMUGGLER Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
  • BerkBerk THE BUDGIE SMUGGLER Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Koshian wrote: »
    Berk wrote: »
    Koshian wrote: »
    Berk wrote: »
    337659783.jpg

    PJvNb.jpg

    8ofN8.gif

    yFHww.gif

    happybirthdaymegan.png

    Berk on
    sig-1.jpg
  • Sweeney TomSweeney Tom Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Zizek hands! (spoiled for nsf56k)
    zizek.jpg
    zizek.jpg
    Zizek.gif
    6a00d8341c630a53ef014e894fe2cd970d-800wi
    4A61DC0550D1B095B413F6_Large.jpg
    zizek.jpg
    zizek+trash.gif
    zizek-2-andy-miah-300x225.jpg
    slavoj-zizek.jpg

    Sweeney Tom on
  • TheySlashThemTheySlashThem Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    who is this zizek person

    TheySlashThem on
  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    apparently the sloppiest philosopher

    Indie Winter on
    wY6K6Jb.gif
  • JarsJars Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    I've figured out how you can get it out unnoticed

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7OwkPGIYY64

    Jars on
  • ShanadeusShanadeus Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    who is this zizek person

    Philosopher.

    Shanadeus on
  • Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    this thread isn't about my little pony at all

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Anjin-San wrote: »
    this thread isn't about my little pony at all

    thank god

    Indie Winter on
    wY6K6Jb.gif
  • Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    sometimes i think i'm left leaning but i want to strangle most leftist or socialist academics and students for being unlikable diarhea people

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
  • CampionCampion Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Anjin-San wrote: »
    this thread isn't about my little pony at all

    Get that pony bullshit out of here, ya ja-Brony.

    Campion on
    4484-7718-8470
  • Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    maybe in the same vein of "man i really love video games but i'm pretty sure if i met a dude who did a final fantasy speed run i'd kill him"

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
  • Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    that's not the sole purpose tho

    as someone from a blue collar family i can identify with unionization and what have you, but i'd be lying if i told you the stalwart defense of stalin and mao as great people didn't fucking alienate the hell out of me

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
  • HellaJeffHellaJeff FAB FRESH RAIIINBOOWWWWWRegistered User regular
    edited July 2011
    I really appreciate RSA

    HellaJeff on
  • TheySlashThemTheySlashThem Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Koshian wrote: »
    who is this zizek person

    here's a good primer on who zizek is & what he stands for. if you find the ideas in this video uncomfortable zizek probably isn't 'for you'

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpAMbpQ8J7g

    maybe I'm just stupid but watching that I was able to get a sense of what he stands against but not so much what he stands for

    TheySlashThem on
  • ShanadeusShanadeus Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Koshian wrote: »
    who is this zizek person

    here's a good primer on who zizek is & what he stands for. if you find the ideas in this video uncomfortable zizek probably isn't 'for you'

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpAMbpQ8J7g

    maybe I'm just stupid but watching that I was able to get a sense of what he stands against but not so much what he stands for

    Now you're talking like one of them.

    Shanadeus on
  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    jewel theft

    is

    Capitalism

    Indie Winter on
    wY6K6Jb.gif
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