[Mass Effect] 4-Player Cooperative Lesbians

Orca

Pssh. What other spectre has personally wiped out an entire star system?

Shepard has 'em all beat. Again.

Dragkonias

So...what the Spectres have a pissing contest to see who can out-jackass who or something?

-Tal

also what is up with their name? SPECial Tactics and REconnaissance? Even if we swallow that the alien council made an acronym out of English for some reason, that is just a bad acronym.

Orca

Dragkonias: of course! To make them even bigger assholes.

-Tal: Bacronyms are stupid like that.

Dragkonias

I don't know how "special" the favored Spectre tactic of "See enemy, shoot them in face." is.

Not to mention I don't know how much reconnaissance they do since everywhere they go ends up being blown up to hell and back.

Orca

Spectres are basically government sanctioned Zaeeds.

manwiththemachinegun

-Tal wrote:

Refusing the spectre reinstation is the right choice because the Council's narrative has finally broken down and people realize that Spectres are just government-sanctioned assholes. And Shepard doesn't need a government sanction to be an asshole.

Too goddamn right.

hamdingers

Anderson's a Captain (or more), now Kaidan outranks him ... what's Shepard have to do to get promoted?

Orca

Not murder everything in sight?

Orca

Heh, I wonder what Shepard's body count is between ME1 and 2. It's gotta be in the thousands.

Lawndart

Orca wrote:

Heh, I wonder what Shepard's body count is between ME1 and 2. It's gotta be in the thousands.

To Commander Shepard, the Reapers aren't a threat...they're competition.

RonTheDM

If Kaidan asks me to consider him anything more than a decryption/first aid bitch I will punch all his organs out.

Dragkonias

I can't wait to see Kaiden/Ashley's ability trees myself.

Aegeri

I can't wait to see if I can shoot Kaiden in the face upon meeting him.

Cambiata

I like Kaidan, but I am eager to see how he reacts to the knowledge that Shepard is boning Garrus.

Dragkonias

You know...I never understood how one of the most downplayed characters in the game garners so much vehemence.

Orca

That sounds like something an indoctrinated Reaper agent would say.

Ad astra

First off, Kaiden can't outrank my Shepard, because he sacrificed himself on Virmire. And secondly, when has rank ever mattered to Shepard?

Cambiata

Ad astra wrote:

when has rank ever mattered to Shepard?

Well it's not Shepard that cares about rank.

It's the insecure gamer who's playing her that does.

Orca

I cry myself to sleep every night because Shepard isn't an admiral yet

Dragkonias

I just like throwing Kaiden's rank out because it hurts peoples egos as much as getting slapped around by Aria.

Ad astra

See, Shepard doesn't need any titles, he knows he's the biggest bad-ass around, and I know he's the biggest bad-ass around.

-Tal

my canon Shepard's first name is literally Commander

Orca

Major Major Major approves

Cambiata

-Tal wrote:

my canon Shepard's first name is literally Commander

:^:

Turambar

Orca wrote:

I cry myself to sleep every night because Shepard isn't an admiral yet

Here's a super secret transcript of ME3's opening:

Supreme Judge: Shepard, you stand charged with actions of galactical awesomeness, How do you plead?
Shepard: Radical
Supreme Judge: Excellent. I hereby sentence you to be promoted to the rank of Captain
Shepard: I object! Grand Admiral or bust!
Supreme Judge: Sustained!
Shepard: Sweet! *pops collar*
Captain Anderson: Everybody dance party!
*and everyone got laid that night*
Mission Complete
End of prologue

Dragkonias

Ad astra wrote:

See, Shepard doesn't need any titles, he knows he's the biggest bad-ass around, and I know he's the biggest bad-ass around.

Whatever he needs to tell himself.

Turambar wrote:

Orca wrote:

I cry myself to sleep every night because Shepard isn't an admiral yet

Here's a super secret transcript of ME3's opening:

Supreme Judge: Shepard, you stand charged with actions of galactical awesomeness, How do you plead?
Shepard: Radical
Supreme Judge: Excellent. I hereby sentence you to be promoted to the rank of Captain
Shepard: I object! Grand Admiral or bust!
Supreme Judge: Sustained!
Shepard: Sweet! *pops collar*
Captain Anderson: Everybody dance party!
*and everyone got laid that night*
Mission Complete
End of prologue

You know...I actually hope Bioware let's us have fun with the trial.

I'm not asking for fun as in goofy, I mean just having a good amount of variables to it so you could plead(or...tell people to fuck off) in multiple ways.

shryke

Ad astra wrote:

First off, Kaiden can't outrank my Shepard, because he sacrificed himself on Virmire. And secondly, when has rank ever mattered to Shepard?

Hey now, Sheppard cares about rank.

Captains are worth more points in on his scoreboard when he shoots them in the face.

manwiththemachinegun

There should be a 'whatever' renegade interrupt in reaction to some Earth lawyer ranting about Shepard's Batarian war crimes.

Dragkonias

manwiththemachinegun wrote:

There should be a 'whatever' renegade interrupt in reaction to some Earth lawyer ranting about Shepard's Batarian war crimes.

Or rather "Deal with it!"

envoy1

batarian war crimes? That's an oxymoron if I ever saw one. Maybe it's a crime not to wage war on Batarians.

Cambiata

Hmm, what is the opposite of a war crime? What Shep committed was Batarian social justice.

curly haired boy

i want to be a raging asshole at the trial

"they were asking for it, sir"

SoundsPlush

"I choose to represent myself. Now, I think I understand the confusion - the prosecution is throwing the phrase "batarian war crimes" around, which sounds pretty bad! But consider, that these are not, in fact, batarian war crimes, but war crimes committed against batarians, which aren't really war crimes at all. Q. E. D."

Shepard is promoted to Fleet Admiral, given an honorary J.D. and a two-pound platinum medal made from all the platinum found in the first game, and treats the tribunal to drinks in Kasumi's room.

-Tal wrote:

my canon Shepard's first name is literally Commander

See, that's why she's never getting promoted.

-Tal

just to piss them off more, appoint Legion as your lawyer

Dox the PI

They uploaded a wallpapper of the new Shepard

Turambar

Legion would make a great lawyer

Spooch

Oh Femshep She's starting to surpass John Shep with these awesome screen shots

Dragkonias

Dox the PI wrote:

They uploaded a wallpapper of the new Shepard

I'm not usually one to say this but...that picture makes me hot in my pants.

curly haired boy

now she looks even younger

wtf bioware

maleshep looks 30, femshep looks 15