It's a story about kids and fun!
It also has possibly the worst fanbase in the world!
Don't believe me? Have a listen to Skull Man's dramatic reading of a choice MSPA fan's post!
Now let me tell you about fantrolls...
You are the Mage of Heart, and you think that rocks.
You are, and have always been, soooo smoooooth. You’re like a kid Casanova, here. At least, that’s what your Uncle tells you, and you believe him utterly.
Girls rock (apparently, but sometimes you aren’t quite ready to admit that they might not be cootie-filled monstrosities), and having a girlfriend would be like, the high point of your life.
And somehow, you manage to have fifteen of them.
Sure, you’ve never met, but the sixteen of you have known each other for, like, years. They’re girls, and they’re friends of yours. That means they’re your girlfriends, right? This logic is perfect in every way.
(It’s entirely possible that that you are, in fact, as immature as most thirteen-year-olds are, unlike the typical Sburb player).
Plus there’s those weird girls who keep trolling you about ‘imminent doom’ and stuff being ‘all your fault’, but you like to think they’re just macking on you.
Oh, and the strange white-text girl who is mostly just imperious and arrogant and stuff. You think it’s funny to listen to her, because she seems to think she’s some sort of omnipotent combination of a Barbie Doll, a sewing kit, and some special code or something.
So yeah, you’re basically rolling in girls, even if a lot of them like to say that you’re kind of annoying or whatever. Your Uncle is so proud of your smoothness.
So, then the Game comes, and THAT’s a big shocker, but all of your girlfriends are okay, so you’re happy. And, in addition, you get a cool title!
And, apparently, you get cool powers, and you do feel something strange when you focused really hard, but it didn’t happen again, so you put it out of your mind.
As it turned out, your power was something truly epic in scale. So epic, in fact, that once it was let loose, there was no stopping it. A wave of force echoed out into the Medium and beyond, affecting something deep inside every living person connected to the Medium, human, troll, carapace, or First Guardian.
Well, it affected every female living person, at least.
It starts out slow. Friends that never really talked to you much are suddenly very chatty. The weird troll girls slowly stop giving out their messages of doom and just start talking to you. Carapace girls keep appearing at your tower to say hi. Even the white-text girl is suddenly much less imperious and a little friendlier.
You start to think that this is pretty nice. You figure that the whole ‘being tolerated by people’ thing is a pleasant thing to have.
Unfortunately for you, while it may have started slow, it would quickly gain speed.
You find yourself butting into memos full of arguments between your friends, arguments mostly full of sniping and insults but still centered on you. The carapace girls keep leaving your dreamself gifts while you’re awake, and your dream room is full of junk and only getting fuller. Your Server keeps intimating that she wants to come meet you, and the thought scares you slightly for reasons you don’t quite understand.
It gets worse.
Pretty soon, you’re on the run from amorous girls at all angles. The Black Queen has issued a warrant for your dreamself’s arrest, and the White Queen keeps sending you messages saying that you can hide from the Black Queen’s agents in her castle, and somehow you can hear the eyebrow waggles in that statement. The white-text girl’s talking about how she knows everything, and she means, everything, and would you like her to teach you some things? The troll girls are apparently halfway to figuring out a way to get into your session, and there are fifteen powerful, jealous girls all trying to find you, and it occurs to you that you are only thirteen and you aren’t quite sure what you’d do with a real girlfriend anyway.
You’re hiding on another planet in a very dark cave and all you can think about is that your title SUCKS and was that a giggle you just heard at the entrance?
You are the Mage, and your fate is to have Power, but lack the Control necessary to keep it from harming you.
And if this isn’t the textbook definition of Power without Control YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT IS.
And, far away, your Uncle sheds a single, manly tear of pride.
How about a side adventure secret?
More dramatic readings courtesy of Skull Man!
And last but not least, awful awful fanart!
Despite all of this, Homestuck is one of the finest webcomics around. It's got an insane plot, engaging and well-written dialogue, a well-realised setting and hilarious humour. It experiments with the medium like no webcomic has done before, and if you haven't tried it yet, give it a shot! It's a long road with many twists and turns, but absolutely worth your investment of time.
And if you do start reading, make sure to post your reactions here!
For everyone else, post your favourite horrible fandom nonsense, as well as awesome fanart, and also discuss the comic!
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