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Selling games for an engagement ring
mrendels
Registered User new member
Registered User new member
I have been dating my current girlfriend for about 4 years now, and have been wanting to get an engagement ring for her since July, but I haven't had any luck saving up money. I was student teaching this last semester, so I basically worked a 50-60 hour a week unpaid job which doesn't really help with putting money away (I've had enough trouble just putting gas in my car). So far, eBaying off a bunch of my old games sounds like the best way for me to get the money I need for the ring I want to get her.
I have a few concerns about this, but I think that it could work out. I would be selling the games on my friends eBay account so she wouldn't notice any activity on mine. I thought it would be easiest to ship the games from my friends house too, and I could just sneak them over one weekend when she is out Christmas shopping. The only thing I am really worried about is the timing, it seems like a bad time of year to sell collectibles when people are buying gifts for others. Most of what I am selling are Working Designs games, harder to find PS1 and PS2 JRPGs, and some SNES games like EarthBound.
Would there be enough people buying games like these at this time of year? I am hoping to propose to my girlfriend at the end of January, so should I list things now, or maybe wait until after the holiday season?
I have a few concerns about this, but I think that it could work out. I would be selling the games on my friends eBay account so she wouldn't notice any activity on mine. I thought it would be easiest to ship the games from my friends house too, and I could just sneak them over one weekend when she is out Christmas shopping. The only thing I am really worried about is the timing, it seems like a bad time of year to sell collectibles when people are buying gifts for others. Most of what I am selling are Working Designs games, harder to find PS1 and PS2 JRPGs, and some SNES games like EarthBound.
Would there be enough people buying games like these at this time of year? I am hoping to propose to my girlfriend at the end of January, so should I list things now, or maybe wait until after the holiday season?
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Sounds like you've got a money issue, and whether that's due to choices by you, or just how it's worked out is something I'd suggest figuring out before you propose.
Does she know your financial situation? If she does, and is asking/hinting for a ring, probably not the best idea. If she doesn't know, that's something you'll want to discuss with her before things go further.
but they're listening to every word I say
People will buy them now. Hell, there are probably plenty of people on these forums willing to buy. Especially the rares ones.
That said, you may have missed the prime collectibles-for-Christmas season, November seems to be the sweet spot. It doesn't hurt to do your research, see what you can reasonably expect, and give it the ol' college try though.
Do what you want, of course, but if money is so tight for the two of you that you have to scrape for an engagement ring, it would be retarded to buy one. They are NOT necessary.
should, in the event that things go sour and she says 'no' or things get really bad and you guys split up after the engagement, will you regret selling those games?
I say this as a female, do not sell something that you are going to regret giving up. because that regret leads to resentment, and that can be very unhealthy.
If, however, you are convinced that you don't want these games, you will never replay them and they have no real sentimental value, then by all means go for it and Mazel Tov.
of course, as others are saying, there might be better things to spend the money on, if you're in a tight enough spot that you have to sell your possessions. But that is ultimately up to you.
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One tip I found useful: never have change. That sounds stupid, but if someone drives all the way to your house to buy a $10 game and only brings a $20, then they're going to have to buy another game!
But still, do you really think you're going to scrounge up enough money for a ring? Do you have time to work somewhere over the holidays to make some extra cash? What about shoveling driveways? Walking dogs? Ask around your neighbourhood. When you get a really good snowfall, just wake up early and go offer to shovel driveways for $10-$20. I know I'd throw someone $10 if it meant that I didn't have to get bundled up and go out there to do it.
This. People tend to grossly overvalue what their games are worth. Wait till you have the money rather than selling things (or if you do, only to supplement the cost) so you can get something memorable.
I totally second this minus the being female part.
Point being, you don't need to spend a bunch of money on the engagement ring, even if having a really nice ring is important to you.
Was just coming to post this. Get in a place where you aren't financially fucked before you propose. I mean, if you're inviting this woman to share your life, get your life sorted first.
If you can afford to sock away $100 a month for savings and stuff, go ahead and sell your games and buy a ring. If not, selling your shit to put yourself further in the hole is probably sub optimal.
Ehhh....wedding rings are generally a damn sight cheaper than engagement rings.
Or, don't get a diamond at all... there are plenty of beautiful alternatives out there.
I'd like to second @lonelyahava's post, and I'll also add that as much as I liked my (inexpensive, sapphire) engagement ring, I really only ever wear my wedding ring. This is because I turned out to have an allergic reaction to the former (:(), but it certainly is more practical and comfortable to just wear the one ring anyway.
I think sometimes folks romanticize being poor and in love. Not saying that's what is happening here. But either way, you don't need the title of husband, I'm sure your lady knows/understand your financial position and wont hold waiting to get married against you. And if she doesn't know... thats not a good place to start an engagement/marriage from.
-Buy a nice band with a cheap rock. The rock can be updated later when you have more cash, or not.
-Buy a wedding band now and get the engagement ring later. This seems odd but wedding bands tend to be more plain without the huge rock, which makes them significantly cheaper. Plus if you end up giving both anyways, does it matter which one is actually used for the proposal?
-Don't buy a ring at all right now. Come up with some really cool way to propose, and just leave out the ring. I don't think proposing with a ring is as big of a deal to a lot of women, as it is for the men. It just seems like you have to have the ring to propose, but honestly with a little creative effort it can be just as fun and romantic without the actual ring.
-In a similar vain as the don't buy a ring right now idea, get a place holder ring. Something that's simple and nice that she could wear on another finger later on if she chooses. That way you have something to symbolize your commitment now, but you can still get a nicer wedding ring/engagement ring later on. This works well if you were only planning on getting the one ring anyway.
As far as the game selling goes, I'm not sure you will be able to predict either way. Before christmas you will benefit from people buying games as gifts, after christmas you will benefit from people buying games for themselves with christmas gift money. Honestly your best bet is to decide what you are willing to accept for the games and post them now, with a minimum. If they don't sell you can try again in January. If they still don't sell, then you'll have to consider dropping the price. Maybe others will come along and tell me I'm full of it, but I just can't see there being a significant change in the acceptable market price for your games between now and January.
I'd lime this if I knew how. I don't know if Pure Din is a gamer, but I'm guessing yes. I am also a gamer and if my boyfriend did this to buy me an engagement ring I'd be so pissed off with him. First, I like to keep all my games, have never sold or traded one. Never intend to. I would not want my boyfriend to either.
Even if I wasn't a gamer, if my boyfriend auctioned off hard to find items he owned, to buy me said ring, that I likely wouldn't wear after we were married, I'd be angry. He might one day be angry he did it and resentful towards me and the situation. And those are his hard to find things, that makes them special. I wouldn't want my boyfriend to give up his special items for me, not for jewelery of any sort.
Propose when you plan to if you'd like, times are changing. I've heard of people doing it without the ring, with a simple ring, or even a ring out of a toy machine for the silliness of it (depends on her humor levels)
Really though... Don't sell off things (anything) just to buy a piece of jewelery. What if you both end up in a bad time and you can't afford rent. She's really going to hate that ring, and maybe even you.
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but they're listening to every word I say
Point is, since I seemed to have gotten off track, but didn't, is; he should know her well enough to know how upset she would be depending on which situation he goes with "not getting a ring. Or getting something too chintzy" etc.
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Let me know if you add me on either.
Straightening out your finances beforehand is a seriously vital part of a successful marriage. One of the biggest causes for divorce is arguing over money problems, and there are a LOT of divorces in the US. Best the both of you be on the same page on that issue.
When buying the ring, for god's sake don't go near a mall or retail store. Keep an eye on craigslist/wholesale outlets, be patient, take the time for due diligence and learn about rings and rocks and their value. Maybe do some 1v1 tutoring, can make some decent additional coin. Use a real budget, and just keep it tight. I would also go along with what others here said about getting something cheap now and upgrading later when you have dentist money.
Steam
Only the strong can help the weak.
And you should think carefully about marrying someone who demands this sort of stupid financial decision, if indeed she does demand it.
OP: If you want to sell some stuff to buy a ring, more power to ya. However, I don't think you're going to get very much from those games, and it's certainly not going to be enough to buy an engagement ring.
@Figgy: If somebody posted on these boards to ask "How do I remove my own appendix?", I think we'd be in the right by telling them "Dude, don't remove your own appendix, you're going to die, go see a doctor." There's no judgement here, when I met my wife I was poorer than the OP (I'd already sold everything I had that was worth selling for food and rent) but we still made it work by not rushing into any bad financial decisions. It took me two years to save up enough to ask her to marry me.
Here's my advice to the OP: don't buy a ring yet. If you have to sell stuff to raise money, you can't afford it. Talk to your girlfriend, make it clear that marriage is in your future and you're saving up money, and make sure you're both in the same page. There's no need to do the "gotcha!" out-of-the-blue proposal. Even if she knows it's coming, the when and where still makes it special. If you've already talked about it with her, good for you. But don't go pawning your possessions.
are entirely unwarranted.
This is what I did for my wife. I used heirloom diamonds and made a beautiful ring (which is awesome because while I didn't forge it in the fires of Mount Doom I did create it from the ground up) for about 1/10 the cost of buying one.
Not sure if that's an option for the OP, but if you've got a mom that supports the marriage, she's probably got a fair bit of jewelry with diamonds that she hasn't worn in 15 years she'd be willing to part with.
I second the question of "How much of a ring are you shopping for?"