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So the title says it. About two months ago I lost my erection having sex with my girlfriend and the next day I tried again and it went away soon after putting the condom on and could not be resuscitated. Back then it was probably due to getting 3-4 hours of sleep a night but now has evolved into a new kind of problem that exists even with normal sleep/diet/exercise. There have been sporadic successes but mostly failures. It's hard to get hard at all and when I do it's hard to keep it. Thinking about sex now gives me a lot of anxiety about what feels like inevitable disappointment when I lose the boner. My girlfriend has been patient and says it's no big deal and I believe her but I feel so crappy about not being able to have sex with her regularly, and I feel like its planting a seed for our eventual break up which is even more distressing. And the feeling of not being able to please her is causing other anxieties as well, along with paranoid fantasies about her thinking about other guys, comparing myself unfavorably to her ex-boyfriends, this insistent feeling of self-debasement when I think about her buying a new sex toy or something, and increased sensitivity to jealousness, and this feeling that she doesn't find me attractive anymore and this impression that she doesn't want to initiate making out or sex or anything of that because she knows it will end in frustration.
Hopefully someone has dealt with and knows how to bring it back to normal. Ughhhhhhhhhh.