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Convincing my Husband to Brush his Teeth

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  • BradicusMaximusBradicusMaximus Pssssssssyyyyyyyy duckRegistered User regular
    Telling him to brush his teeth is far from nagging. Thats just disgusting. I'd be completely honest to my SO if she was expecting a kiss and had gone about week without. I cringe just thinking about all the nasty buildup inside a mouth that isn't receiving semi-decent tlc.

    Also, you should take the time sometime to show him some pictures of fucked up teeth. That'll teach him! Maybe not, but still. Blegh.

  • jwidemanjwideman Registered User regular
    Druhim wrote: »
    If he doesn't like how it feels, I wonder if he's referring to pain/bleeding gums, which would likely be a result of poor oral hygiene.

    Yeah, if it hurts when he brushes his teeth, it's because he needs to brush them MORE.

  • schussschuss Registered User regular
    Also, it's not only you who have to deal with it. Anyone who interacts with him on a regular basis is probably praying for him to brush more.

  • ihmmyihmmy Registered User regular
    my partner also has some oral care issues. Fairly early on we made the agreement that if I requested he use mouthwash before we bed each other, he does so. I tend to also try and do a rinse out with mouthwash at the same time since it's only fair. I think I had said something along the lines of "not to be rude, but your breath is not fantastic sometimes - if I ask you to do mouthwash before we fuck is that ok?" to which he said "of course" because, well, it resulted in happier fun sex times for him.

  • Dr. FrenchensteinDr. Frenchenstein Registered User regular
    jwideman wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    If he doesn't like how it feels, I wonder if he's referring to pain/bleeding gums, which would likely be a result of poor oral hygiene.

    Yeah, if it hurts when he brushes his teeth, it's because he needs to brush them MORE.

    If it hurts to brush his teeth, he needs to go to the goddamn dentist.

    ugh, there is a bartender who i sort of know, but haven't seen in a while. I went to his bar over the weekend, and his teeth were turning fucking BLACK. I could not stop staring. i can't even imagine what his breath must smell like.

  • fightinfilipinofightinfilipino Angry as Hell #BLMRegistered User regular
    if he thinks it's unpleasant to brush his teeth now, just wait until the cavities and gingivitis kick in.

    this isn't just a "spouse feels icky" issue, this is your husband's health at stake. not only can his teeth rot and fall out, he could get sepsis from the bacteria that are no doubt festering in his mouthal parts.

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  • wiltingwilting I had fun once and it was awful Registered User regular
    It is worth adding that serious gum infections can travel to the heart and kill you.

  • hoodie13hoodie13 punch bro Registered User regular
    edited August 2012
    Brush his fucking teeth while he's asleep, jesus. I mean, I'm only like 25% joking here.

    OP, you're way more patient that I could ever be. This would be grounds for sleeping on the sofa. And a 3-5 foot personal space enforcement.

    edit for help/advice: Push him away. Start being a "withholder", because he can't take care of himself like a normal person. When he starts to perform normal adult personal maintenance, then you get close to him. Also, what's up with you that you're putting up with this? This goes beyond not wanting to be a "nag" or not liking people who withhold to get what they want.

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  • DhalphirDhalphir don't you open that trapdoor you're a fool if you dareRegistered User regular
    Your husband is an objectively disgusting individual and needs to be told this.

    Seriously. Its not that fucking hard to brush your teeth, it takes a TOTAL of a few minutes a day to brush twice.

    It is fucking disgusting and he needs a kick in the head for even thinking he can not do it.

  • jwidemanjwideman Registered User regular
    Oh, and I'll note - brushing isn't enough. You have to floss too.

  • Mr.RitzMr.Ritz Registered User regular
    I hope he has a better dental plan than me. I paid out 3k to have all my teeth fixed and I brushed :C

  • HeirHeir Ausitn, TXRegistered User regular
    Mr.Ritz wrote: »
    I hope he has a better dental plan than me. I paid out 3k to have all my teeth fixed and I brushed :C

    You got off light. I didn't go to the dentist for about 12 years after college. All in all I spent about 5 grand. Had to get a tooth pulled and an implant put in, plus some cavities I needed to get filled. My insurance maybe covered 2 grand more on top of the 5 I paid.

    Lesson learned, and I'm pretty anal retentive about oral care now. It was a painful and expensive lesson, and I hope the OP's husband gets his act together, both for his sake, and their relationship's.

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  • KalTorakKalTorak One way or another, they all end up in the Undercity.Registered User regular
    My wife got me to brush by insisting on it before sex. Pretty simple.

  • BagginsesBagginses __BANNED USERS regular
    jwideman wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    If he doesn't like how it feels, I wonder if he's referring to pain/bleeding gums, which would likely be a result of poor oral hygiene.

    Yeah, if it hurts when he brushes his teeth, it's because he needs to brush them MORE.

    There are prescription mouthwashes (or maybe over the counter. I get all my dental care from family so I have no idea where it comes from) that deal with that. The only major side effect is some yellowing.

    At this point, he's dealing with the type of calculus normal toothbrushes do jack shit against. He needs the scaler.

  • schussschuss Registered User regular
    Ah, the scaler, or as I called it - Mouth Rape.

  • DhalphirDhalphir don't you open that trapdoor you're a fool if you dareRegistered User regular
    Yeah, seriously, the first thing this guy does before brushing is go get a professional clean from a dentist.

  • DhalphirDhalphir don't you open that trapdoor you're a fool if you dareRegistered User regular
    KalTorak wrote: »
    My wife got me to brush by insisting on it before sex. Pretty simple.

    I don't even understand why you needed convincing to brush your teeth.
    This is absurd to me. Why would it even be a thing that you would CONSIDER not doing?

    I would expect to have to convince a 5 year old child to brush their teeth. I would not expect someone to have to convince a grown man by WITHHOLDING SEX.

    what the fuck is wrong with you people

  • EsseeEssee The pinkest of hair. Victoria, BCRegistered User regular
    Dhalphir wrote: »
    KalTorak wrote: »
    My wife got me to brush by insisting on it before sex. Pretty simple.

    I don't even understand why you needed convincing to brush your teeth.
    This is absurd to me. Why would it even be a thing that you would CONSIDER not doing?

    I would expect to have to convince a 5 year old child to brush their teeth. I would not expect someone to have to convince a grown man by WITHHOLDING SEX.

    what the fuck is wrong with you people

    It's really about getting brushing your teeth into a routine. Because if you DON'T get used to doing it and having it be mandatory early, it's really easy to do things like skip brushing your teeth because you're already falling asleep. This is why the idea of having your partner reinforce the habit somehow is a good one. I know it seems retarded/fucked up to you because yeah, it only takes a couple of minutes. But when it's something you're not already used to doing all the time and you'd have to make yourself get up when your body wants to sleep in order to do it, it's really easy to put it off and say "well missing one day isn't a big deal". Or maybe you just forget to do it altogether because you fell asleep without thinking about it, since it hasn't become something that's always part of your bedtime routine. And then it happens again and it piles up into multiple days of not doing it.

    Now the case with the OP's husband is different because he's actually saying brushing doesn't matter at all, which is being willfully ignorant about what happens when you neglect dental health. But I think there are plenty of relatively normal people who can fall into a bad pattern, and KNOW they've fallen into a bad pattern they're having trouble breaking, when it comes to hygiene routines (of any type), and that's even easier if you never established a good pattern as a kid. I mean I know it's kind of expected that I would defend people who did this a little since I was sharing my story in the thread, but really, it's only something you would never consider skipping because you had the habit and the reasons it was necessary ingrained early on (as did most people, which is why most people can't imagine a week going by without doing it). And boy, what I wouldn't give to have actually listened to my parents when I was a kid, now that I've had to deal with the fallout from my childhood/adolescent stupidity. At any rate, I think it's great for the OP to be able to hear from people who had similar issues but managed to get over them so she knows it's really possible for him to change his habits and how people changed their own. It's a pretty embarrassing thing to tell someone about yourself/your past (well, for me it sure is) so for people to feel that they're able to speak up about it is good.

  • PaladinPaladin Registered User regular
    maybe streak the nastiest part of his teeth onto a blood agar and see how that compares to yours

    maybe do a secret trial first if it looks like it could backfire since it sometimes does with mouth

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  • ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    Some of you are kinda being assholes so I'm going to lock this since she said it was solved anyway.

    I forget how fucking judgmental some of you can be sometimes.

    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
This discussion has been closed.