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A reoccurring problem
PixelMonkey
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
Ok guys here's my problem since I've got my new job and have actually managed to get a job as graphic designer. Every two weeks or so I've been going to a brothel. I mean I do have the money to afford it and I don't spend much money on non essentials. The main reason for this I've basically given up on the female sex. I know I'm not good enough unless I put on more muscle and at least with hookers it's all business. The point is I've going do regularly because it's hopeless the other way.
So guys how do I kick the habit hah oh god I'm actually crying I just want something to happen to prove I'm not destined to spend my twenties alone.
So guys how do I kick the habit hah oh god I'm actually crying I just want something to happen to prove I'm not destined to spend my twenties alone.
PixelMonkey on
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And even if you do spend your 20s alone... so what? There are worse things than not having a partner. Make friends and have a good time. Your 30's may be when you get married and have a stable of children or wherever you keep those. Or your 40s. In the mean time you can save your money so you can have a nice retirement, and if you do get those kids someday you can give them the things they need and want.
I get that you're hurting but you can't view women as objects that you put "nice" into and "relationships" fall out of in exchange. I daresay your time at the brothels is only reinforcing the worst of the stereotypes running around your brain.
Join a dating site, be brutally honest about yourself, and see who you connect to. I did that, and even though I did not marry anyone I met there I can honestly say that those relationships unloaded the baggage I was carrying so that by the time I met my wife I was in a place where I could act on it.
You're not hopeless, unlovable, or destined to be alone.
It sounds like you have some serious self esteem issues and that probably make you a drag to be around.
but they're listening to every word I say
Brothels are fine if you are going for the right reasons, but that does not sound like it is the case here. It is not *really* what you want.
If all the females around you want guys with muscles (truly and not just what you THINK they want), then you are around the wrong group of females. It is just not true and the older they get, the less true it becomes.
Sure, it could be good. But I think the number thing is to make sure you arent a chore to be around. Make sure, op, you arent constantly say, complaining or argumentative, or talking about your pokemons or whatever. Personality is number 1.
but they're listening to every word I say
As far as your muscles go, I train with a large number of weightlifters, some of whom are at Olympic level. All of them are heavily muscled, and several of them couldn't get laid in a morgue. If you want big muscles several people here (myself included) can assure you that it's within your power no matter what your starting point. If you think it's going to automatically make you attractive to women, I'm afraid you're shit out of luck. There aren't any quick fixes there, and if you're incredibly unhappy and borderline unstable because you don't have a girlfriend the harsh truth is that you're 100% not in a position to have a healthy relationship.
Are you reading any of the posts (and parts of posts) you didn't respond to, by pretty much everyone, telling you that the problem has nothing to do with this? Because you should. Because the problem here has nothing to do with muscles. Whatsoever.
No, he isn't.
We've been over this many many times with him in threads in SE, and more recently through PM's, and he steadfastly refuses to believe it's an attitude/perception/mental process thing nor makes any motion to do anything about it.
Actually I am seeing a new shrink , alot nicer then the last one hasn't any of the alpha/beta stuff yet. Blagh accidentally agreed with that post stupid tiny IPhone screen.
Women who don't like you because you're not muscular are not women you want to spend your time with anyway.
wat
I hear the olympic villiage is great for finding hook-ups...
Ha you flatter me but no compared to olympic level atheletes I'm a weak peice of shit. There are guys that have no problem doing under 2 hours.
This is REALLY beside the point, but the world record for the marathon is 2:03 and depending on the race winners regularly finish in the 2:20s...so, not sure what to make of this. In any case, sounds like you don't have anything to be ashamed of in that department.
Yes I do... in before herp a durp you desire to actually manage to get a girlfriend you must a creepy bastard that views women only as having worth due to their genitals.
I will tell you right now that the only muscle in your body preventing you from having a healthy and fulfilling relationship with the companionship you desire is your brain. Your commentary on what people are saying is worthless and smacks of someone who doesn't actually read it but instead is just fishing for some compliments to quicken you a little bit. You are not taking anything said to you to heart and this is not what we're here for.
Contrary to what some may believe, we are not here for you to sit around sounding depressed at. If you actually want to know how to get actual help, feel free to make a new thread.
That may sound harsh, but there is literally nothing else for me to tell you. It's good that you have a therapist now, because H/A is not stand-in therapy. If you don't want to see prostitutes, stop seeing prostitutes. If you want to keep doing it, it's your money. If you want a meaningful relationship with another human being stop being such a self-centered echo-chamber of depression and start finding and taking steps to better yourself. If you want to keep the echo chamber for now no one is going to stop you, but they aren't going to want to fucking hear about it either.