They probably didn't want to worry people. Some people become more anxious when people express concern or offer support.
There's a few weird personality traits/disorders in play. Basically he probably didn't want to worry anyone, to the point where I'm not sure he's even told his family. And his girlfriend went off and had a week long panic attack and locked herself in her room, which is how she deals with stress.
anyway the marvellous reframe was "hey, at least the heart surgery cured my asthma*!"
* note: he did not have asthma. What he thought was exercise induced asthma turned out to be periodic symptoms of a congenital heart problem. But yes, now cured.
WearingglassesOf the friendly neighborhood varietyRegistered Userregular
Is this still on?
I kept meaning to post, but I'm a bit embarassed. Anyway, I tried doing eight comic pages in 8 hours (as a mini-variant of the 24-hour comic day challenge), but I couldn't even finish four. That was mildly discouraging.
Although, I kept putting it off for years, so the mere attempt felt refreshing. So that reframing felt good. I guess.
so, i lazed about the house 'til late afternoon, eating nothing, then got frustrated with myself at not accomplishing anything i vaguely meant to and thought, "Welp, today was wasted." and then i caught myself, said nope, not how it's gonna be, got dressed, gathered my things, stopped by the cheese shop and set up in the coffee shop to knit. still not what i planned to do, but i've eaten, i'm crafting, and got a chuckle out of some silly teenagers (a redundant adjective.)
still need to get set up with all the doctors, but i'm better than a year ago.
i knew the material backwards and forwards but the actual problems used a lot of complicated fractions and I didn't have a calculator that could handle fractions without turning them into decimal values, so i had to mentally convert/reduce them and that took way too long and i didn't have enough time to finish or check any of my work
depending on how much partial credit they give for the questions that I rushed through and almost certainly got wrong it might not be possible to get an A in the course anymore
and my mom has made it abundantly clear that the second i bring home anything less than an A she is going to stop helping to pay for college and I have no idea how i'm going to afford it without her help
Got the test back today
Practically had a panic attack while he was passing them out
Ended up with a 68
Which is awful but I only needed to break a 50 to still have a chance at an A so I was ok with it
But then he announced that everybody bombed hard
To the point that he is offering a make up test next week and he will only record the higher of the 2 grades
So
Feeling pretty okay at the moment
god dammit god dammit god dammit god DAMMIT
I had the makeup test today, which was done through an online service at the school testing center
partially through the exam, I was logged out for inactivity while working through a problem on scratch paper
I try to log back in and it tells me my password is wrong
I try a few more times and it locks my account!
turns out the caps lock was enabled without my realizing it, I must have hit it by accident when tabbing through some text fields or something
anyway, the testing center couldn't do jack about it, and told me I'd have to talk to my professor about it
so now unless I get a second second chance on this motherfucking test I'm stuck with the god damned 68! All the studying I did this past week to ensure I didn't repeat the same mistakes could very well add up to absolutely fucking zero because of a god damned asinine technical error!
All you can do is tell it to your professor straight and hope he is a cool dude.
You may be surprised, if you are honest and straight forward many teachers are surprisingly understanding. As long as their students are being earnest and putting forth an effort, which you clearly are.
VivixenneRemember your training, and we'll get through this just fine.Registered Userregular
The testing center will also be able to back you up. You're going to be ok.
You said yourself a 68 was still more than what you absolutely needed. A higher grade helps of course but it's still not hopeless if you don't get a second second chance.
Be sure to hang onto the scratch paper. Physical evidence and all that.
They didn't let me take it with me for test security
He's reset the timer on my test so that I have until 10 pm to finish but I still haven't heard back from the much learning people about resetting my account
strictly speaking this is 100% my fault, I should have checked to see if I had the caps locks on instead of just assuming that i was fat-fingering my password over and over
it's just such a stupid, tiny thing and so, so much of my time is being invalidated by it
i want to know what dumbfuck programmed the website to time you out while you're taking an exam in the first place
what use could that possibly serve other than costing people time while they log back in or, in the worst case scenario, making someone fail their exam like what's happening to me
MetalbourneInside a cluster b personalityRegistered Userregular
An issue that reframed itself, I got a bill today. Sure, I get bills all the time, but this was a special bill. My insurance has finally paid the grand majority of the cost of my blood test and instead of 257 bucks I only have to pay 19 and some change.
If they're tests for hormones, that's on the lower end.
I went once to a private clinic to see how much my blood test would be, because the doctor was requesting 8 or 9 different tests, came out to like 600$.
Alternative was waiting at the blood clinic at the hospital for 2ish hours and get it for free.
I am tired, didn't sleep well last night, and have been working crunch hours all week.
But I'll be damned if that will stop me from going to a bar until 2am tonight to drink and also draw
I tend to get easily caught up in my own world. Everything has felt like I am just barely keeping up lately. Work has been super busy and it feels like things don't get done on time, or don't get done the way they should, or I have to wait on other people to do their part, etc etc.
When I am not working (and sometimes when I am) I am planning my wedding/honeymoon which is a lot of work but more so because I am an American service member getting married to a Korean in Korea.
I spend a lot of time watching/reading the news and everything is pretty crazy back home for a lot of people. When I don't do that I play games or watch videos on Youtube. I end up thinking there are other things I should be doing like practising my Korean or working out.
So as you can see I spend a lot of time stressed out. But today I had a thought; kind out of the blue. "What if everything is gonna be ok?" What if work is gonna be just fine? What if the wedding will be wonderful? What if the honeymoon is great? What if I don't worry about the fact that my family is having a rough time and the government can't get its shit together? What if the world isn't falling to pieces and I'm not responsible for putting it back together?
What if I am ok? And the world is ok? And everything is just fine? What if..
... Just those thoughts alone were enough to make me sit down in the subway for a sec and breathe a sigh of relief.
The world is wonderful. People are awesome. And I am grateful to be alive. Everyone have a good weekend.
When have power, how get skill? - Me
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VivixenneRemember your training, and we'll get through this just fine.Registered Userregular
I am tired, didn't sleep well last night, and have been working crunch hours all week.
But I'll be damned if that will stop me from going to a bar until 2am tonight to drink and also draw
my sister now lives in Seattle and loves drink and draws
if you encounter a loudmouthed Asian girl with ludicrously big boobs please tell her that her sister misses her but is very proud of her
I am tired, didn't sleep well last night, and have been working crunch hours all week.
But I'll be damned if that will stop me from going to a bar until 2am tonight to drink and also draw
my sister now lives in Seattle and loves drink and draws
if you encounter a loudmouthed Asian girl with ludicrously big boobs please tell her that her sister misses her but is very proud of her
I will make it a point to meet every loudmouthed Asian girl with ludicrously big boobs in the Seattle area.
So you can understand why I was willing to let it go to collections
I'm sorry, I can't pay you for that: the story of nearly my entire medical history
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Brovid Hasselsmof[Growling historic on the fury road]Registered Userregular
edited October 2013
I applied to a job in a bank a few days ago, and got an e-mail inviting me to do a couple of online tests. I did them today, and fucked one of them up really badly.
It was a load of "6 x ? - 75 = 550?" style questions where you had to figure out "?". They were timed, the first lot you had 20 seconds, the next lot 19, the next lot 18, etc.
I got halfway through fine and then my brain suddenly went WHAT IS MATHS???? and I just totally forgot how to do the thing I had just been doing for the last five minutes. I was rendered an imbecile, and totally flunked the second half. I got really stressed out and upset about it and had a bit of a cry because I felt like a loser and I'm never ever going to get a better job and I'm just a failure and will never do anything.
Then decided to go for run, and did my 5k and just kept going and did 10k. And when I got back I felt much better and am now reframing this as "Why the hell would I want to work in a bank, anyway?"
Your brain just got tired. The best way to overcome that is practice tests to build stamina
Paladin on
Marty: The future, it's where you're going? Doc: That's right, twenty five years into the future. I've always dreamed on seeing the future, looking beyond my years, seeing the progress of mankind. I'll also be able to see who wins the next twenty-five world series.
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VivixenneRemember your training, and we'll get through this just fine.Registered Userregular
So you can understand why I was willing to let it go to collections
I'm sorry, I can't pay you for that: the story of nearly my entire medical history
ugh every time I hear how much shit really costs in the US it leaves me really, really scared
because my sister lives in Seattle and it worries the fuck out of me that if something happens she is basically screwed because she doesn't have a job that gives her access to insurance
I applied to a job in a bank a few days ago, and got an e-mail inviting me to do a couple of online tests. I did them today, and fucked one of them up really badly.
It was a load of "6 x ? - 75 = 550?" style questions where you had to figure out "?". They were timed, the first lot you had 20 seconds, the next lot 19, the next lot 18, etc.
I got halfway through fine and then my brain suddenly went WHAT IS MATHS???? and I just totally forgot how to do the thing I had just been doing for the last five minutes. I was rendered an imbecile, and totally flunked the second half. I got really stressed out and upset about it and had a bit of a cry because I felt like a loser and I'm never ever going to get a better job and I'm just a failure and will never do anything.
Then decided to go for run, and did my 5k and just kept going and did 10k. And when I got back I felt much better and am now reframing this as "Why the hell would I want to work in a bank, anyway?"
I'm so glad to hear you're feeling better. Nothing like your brain slipping a bit and letting you down to make you feel like crap, even though it happens to everyone.
It sounds like a ridiculous way to assess if someone can work in a bank anyway, given the tellers I've encountered in banks don't appear to be algebraic savants either.
I might be totally wrong about this, but I think the US has seen a rise in ridiculous job qualifications like that
so many people are looking for work, employers will demand you be extra qualified in order to not get flooded with applications/sometimes just because they can
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UnbrokenEvaHIGH ON THE WIREBUT I WON'T TRIP ITRegistered Userregular
so a fan asked comics writer Matt Fraction about depression and suicide, and his response is pretty dang powerful. Sharing it here, in case it helps anyone else out that is in a bad way, mentally
Sorry to put this on you but I have an honest question about depression an suicide. Isn't it completely possible for it to be a alternative for someone. Can't there be someone out there who genuinely is tired and doesn't want to continue. I know there is beauty and wonderful things in this world. There are things to look forward to. There will be more pain but also more laughter. But what if I'm not interested?
well… well first off, i’d say, seek professional help immediately. because i am wildly unqualified to answer your question with anything but experience. and first off, my experience says, if you are in such a deep and dark place where you say things like this to total strangers on the internet, you need to be in contact with someone that can help you start to heal.
second, i’d say… you’re wrong. i’d say the things any of us don’t know, especially about tomorrow, could blanket every grain of sand on every beach of the world with bullshit. And to simply assume you are done tomorrow because you are done today is a mistake. a factual mistake, an error, a critical miscalculation.
i’d say, read Tad Friend’s piece JUMPERS in which he seeks and finds and talks to people that jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge — and lived. And they all say the same variations this: “I instantly realized that everything in my life that I’d thought was unfixable was totally fixable—except for having just jumped.”
And know that this piece has kept me in my seat on more than a couple dark nights.
And i’d say — i’d say i felt that way before too, and i was wrong.
And then i’d tell you something i don’t even think my wife knows. this happend years before we met — shit, more than a decade — and it’s not the first time i came close to suicide was on a thanksgiving night. i’d eaten well and then as the house shut down i went into the bathroom, drew a bath as hot as i could manage to stand, and climbed into the tub with a razor blade.
As i started to cut, as the corner touched my skin and that jolt of pain fired into my head, i stopped and thought — y’know, last chance. Are you SURE?
And i was tired. I sounded like you, that i knew there’d be ups again and downs but i was just so fucking TIRED i couldn’t stand the thought of having to get there. I felt this… this never-ending crush of days that were grey and tepid but for some reason i was supposed to greet each one with a smile. the constant pressure of having to keep my shit in all the time was just exhausting.
I wondered, then — well, is there anything you’re curious about. Anything you want to see play out. And i thought of a comic i was reading and i’d not figured out the end of the current storyline. And i realized I had curiosity. And that was the hook i’d hang my hat on. that by wanting to see how something played out I wasn’t really ready. That little sprout of a thing poking up through all that black earth kept me around a little longer.
I realized then that it had been so long since i’d laughed. I was numbed out and shut down and just… i missed laughing. maybe if i laughed a little i could get moving again. so i’d wait for my comic to conclude, try to find a few laughs, and then reevaluate.
So I’m in the bathtub and i got this real sharp-ass razor, right? And i look down and there’s all my bits floating in the water like they do and i thought okay, let’s get funny and i got to work.
I shaved off exactly half my pubic hair vertically. The end result was a ‘fro of pubes that looked like a Chia Pet that only half-worked. I started to laugh as I did it. And every time i’d piss, looking down made me laugh.
Because JESUS what a nightmare.
Shortly thereafter I got very heavily into Chuck Jones and Tex Avery. Way less chafing and way more funny.
jesus. i was still in high school at the time. dig if you will a picture of the chubby weirdo that was always giggling at his dick in the bathroom. that was me.
And then I guess I’d tell you about Dave, who did the same thing as me a few years later, only DIDN’T have my hilarious Chia Dick strategy in mind and got the razor in and up. And as he started to bleed out “Brown Eyed Girl” came on the radio and he realized he’d never get to hear that again so, in a bloody comedy of errors — I swear to god this is true — he got out of the tub, tried to get dressed the best he could, went downstairs calling for help only to find his family gone, went out to his car, and drove to doug’s house only to find doug not home and so, then, finally, he blacked out from blood loss sitting there in his car, playing a van morrison CD on repeat, until, by luck, Doug’s mom came home and found him.
Fucking Van Morrison, y’know?
A song, a comic, something dumb, something small. From that seed can come everything else, I swear to god.
I guess last I’d say… I’d say that, look — if you reached out to me for an answer, than I have to reach back out to you and insist you hear it. Because it means, what, you know me? My work? You read my stuff and thought, well, fuck, if anyone would know why I shouldn’t end my life, if anyone alive is QUALIFIED TO SAVE ME it’s the guy that had britney spears punch a bear? okay — okay, then, so as THAT GUY I’m saying: Get help. Now, today, tonight, whenever — get to a phone and find a doctor that can try to help you heal, that can try to recolorize your world again, that can help you start caring again. All you need is that one tiny thing, that speck, that little grain of sand. the World Series, AVENGERS 2, Tina Fey’s new show, the first issue of PRETTY DEADLY, some slice of the world you’ve never seen, some drink you love, who the fuck will love your dog like you do if you’re gone, what if jabrams KILLS it on the new STAR WARS, the hell are you doing for Halloween, you ever feed a dolphin with your bare hand? because i have and I am fucking telling you IT IS A THING TO EXPERIENCE and oh god WHAT FUCKING FONT WILL STARBUCKS USE ON THE CHRISTMAS DRINK SLEEVES THIS YEAR — i don’t care what or how dumb but i promise you somewhere in your life is that one fleck of dust that can help start you on the road back. That’s all it takes. One fucking mote, drifting through your head.
And because you asked me I am answering you because i know, motherfucker, i know, i know, i know the hole you are fucking in because I was there myself and if you look hard you can still see my writing on those walls and if you stare long enough i swear to god it’s pointing to up
Thanks for posting that, it's kinda what I needed just now
PSN- AHermano
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Brovid Hasselsmof[Growling historic on the fury road]Registered Userregular
Spoilered for dark
I like things like that, I agree with it. But I also hate reading them because it makes me think about my mate who hanged herself and whether in the last second before she couldn't think any more if she had that spark of "wait..." and that makes me feel so scared and sad and sick and just damnit.
Posts
There's a few weird personality traits/disorders in play. Basically he probably didn't want to worry anyone, to the point where I'm not sure he's even told his family. And his girlfriend went off and had a week long panic attack and locked herself in her room, which is how she deals with stress.
anyway the marvellous reframe was "hey, at least the heart surgery cured my asthma*!"
* note: he did not have asthma. What he thought was exercise induced asthma turned out to be periodic symptoms of a congenital heart problem. But yes, now cured.
I kept meaning to post, but I'm a bit embarassed. Anyway, I tried doing eight comic pages in 8 hours (as a mini-variant of the 24-hour comic day challenge), but I couldn't even finish four. That was mildly discouraging.
Although, I kept putting it off for years, so the mere attempt felt refreshing. So that reframing felt good. I guess.
still need to get set up with all the doctors, but i'm better than a year ago.
god dammit god dammit god dammit god DAMMIT
I had the makeup test today, which was done through an online service at the school testing center
partially through the exam, I was logged out for inactivity while working through a problem on scratch paper
I try to log back in and it tells me my password is wrong
I try a few more times and it locks my account!
turns out the caps lock was enabled without my realizing it, I must have hit it by accident when tabbing through some text fields or something
anyway, the testing center couldn't do jack about it, and told me I'd have to talk to my professor about it
so now unless I get a second second chance on this motherfucking test I'm stuck with the god damned 68! All the studying I did this past week to ensure I didn't repeat the same mistakes could very well add up to absolutely fucking zero because of a god damned asinine technical error!
I am fucking furious
http://www.audioentropy.com/
All you can do is tell it to your professor straight and hope he is a cool dude.
You may be surprised, if you are honest and straight forward many teachers are surprisingly understanding. As long as their students are being earnest and putting forth an effort, which you clearly are.
You said yourself a 68 was still more than what you absolutely needed. A higher grade helps of course but it's still not hopeless if you don't get a second second chance.
They didn't let me take it with me for test security
He's reset the timer on my test so that I have until 10 pm to finish but I still haven't heard back from the much learning people about resetting my account
http://www.audioentropy.com/
strictly speaking this is 100% my fault, I should have checked to see if I had the caps locks on instead of just assuming that i was fat-fingering my password over and over
it's just such a stupid, tiny thing and so, so much of my time is being invalidated by it
http://www.audioentropy.com/
what use could that possibly serve other than costing people time while they log back in or, in the worst case scenario, making someone fail their exam like what's happening to me
http://www.audioentropy.com/
just seems like a thing that could lead to problems
http://www.audioentropy.com/
http://www.audioentropy.com/
Bout fucking time.
Think I did well
Better than a 68 anyway
http://www.audioentropy.com/
http://www.audioentropy.com/
blood tests cost $257 in the US?!
which is why not having insurance and then needing basically anything is a super shitty spot to find yourself in
I went once to a private clinic to see how much my blood test would be, because the doctor was requesting 8 or 9 different tests, came out to like 600$.
Alternative was waiting at the blood clinic at the hospital for 2ish hours and get it for free.
But I'll be damned if that will stop me from going to a bar until 2am tonight to drink and also draw
hey satan...: thinkgeek amazon My post |
When I am not working (and sometimes when I am) I am planning my wedding/honeymoon which is a lot of work but more so because I am an American service member getting married to a Korean in Korea.
I spend a lot of time watching/reading the news and everything is pretty crazy back home for a lot of people. When I don't do that I play games or watch videos on Youtube. I end up thinking there are other things I should be doing like practising my Korean or working out.
So as you can see I spend a lot of time stressed out. But today I had a thought; kind out of the blue. "What if everything is gonna be ok?" What if work is gonna be just fine? What if the wedding will be wonderful? What if the honeymoon is great? What if I don't worry about the fact that my family is having a rough time and the government can't get its shit together? What if the world isn't falling to pieces and I'm not responsible for putting it back together?
What if I am ok? And the world is ok? And everything is just fine? What if..
... Just those thoughts alone were enough to make me sit down in the subway for a sec and breathe a sigh of relief.
The world is wonderful. People are awesome. And I am grateful to be alive. Everyone have a good weekend.
my sister now lives in Seattle and loves drink and draws
if you encounter a loudmouthed Asian girl with ludicrously big boobs please tell her that her sister misses her but is very proud of her
I will make it a point to meet every loudmouthed Asian girl with ludicrously big boobs in the Seattle area.
hey satan...: thinkgeek amazon My post |
Yes.
So you can understand why I was willing to let it go to collections
Jet lag fucking sucks
e: wait this isn't the job thread at all
I do have a couple of my grandmother's paintings that could use some good frames...
I'm sorry, I can't pay you for that: the story of nearly my entire medical history
It was a load of "6 x ? - 75 = 550?" style questions where you had to figure out "?". They were timed, the first lot you had 20 seconds, the next lot 19, the next lot 18, etc.
I got halfway through fine and then my brain suddenly went WHAT IS MATHS???? and I just totally forgot how to do the thing I had just been doing for the last five minutes. I was rendered an imbecile, and totally flunked the second half. I got really stressed out and upset about it and had a bit of a cry because I felt like a loser and I'm never ever going to get a better job and I'm just a failure and will never do anything.
Then decided to go for run, and did my 5k and just kept going and did 10k. And when I got back I felt much better and am now reframing this as "Why the hell would I want to work in a bank, anyway?"
Doc: That's right, twenty five years into the future. I've always dreamed on seeing the future, looking beyond my years, seeing the progress of mankind. I'll also be able to see who wins the next twenty-five world series.
ugh every time I hear how much shit really costs in the US it leaves me really, really scared
because my sister lives in Seattle and it worries the fuck out of me that if something happens she is basically screwed because she doesn't have a job that gives her access to insurance
I'm so glad to hear you're feeling better. Nothing like your brain slipping a bit and letting you down to make you feel like crap, even though it happens to everyone.
It sounds like a ridiculous way to assess if someone can work in a bank anyway, given the tellers I've encountered in banks don't appear to be algebraic savants either.
so many people are looking for work, employers will demand you be extra qualified in order to not get flooded with applications/sometimes just because they can
http://mattfraction.com/post/63999786236/sorry-to-put-this-on-you-but-i-have-an-honest-question
PSN- AHermano