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Floofy
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
Two page comic for character design. I know the writing clunks a bit, or a lot. The colouring isn't entirely good because I had draconian time restraints. (YOU HAVE A DAY. Pencil until your hands bleed, my minions, ink! Scan! Colour!)
The good thing about my course is being able to rent out beautiful film SLRs and mess around taking rolls and rolls of photos and then turning them upside down in an attempt to be, like, DEEP, man. But I still like this one.
Comissioned character portait, finished a little while ago. Feel a bit eh about it, rather static pose. But at least I didn't chicken out of the background for once.
The good thing about my course is being able to rent out beautiful film SLRs and mess around taking rolls and rolls of photos and then turning them upside down in an attempt to be, like, DEEP, man. But I still like this one.
Comissioned character portait, finished a little while ago. Feel a bit eh about it, rather static pose. But at least I didn't chicken out of the background for once.
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What bugs me is that there's no denoument with the boy. At first reading, I thought the girl turned the boy into a butterfly then burnt him, but it seems you nudged him away from existence. You'll have to be wary that the reader will remember any subjects you presented to him/her because if you just forget about them and move on with the story, the reader will stop and say 'hey, what happened to blah blah blah?'
About the commissioned character portrait, there's nothing really wrong about it. Except that it's boring. I... don't know why. It might be the lack of contrast, the boring pose, or the generic character design. Taking another glance, I like the composition actually, there's a nice rythm and movement going on, but it's hampered by that sword. Making art appealing (and thus sellable, no offense, but I don't know how you got someone to commission you) is an art itself. Finding how to make things aesthetically pleasing is probably the most important skill you have. It's something you have to teach yourself probably, but I know there are classes just for that. (and no, they aren't howtodraw anime classes)
I like the photo quite a bit.
On the portrait, the small bloom effect you have around the girl doesn't do much for the piece. Her right thigh seems to be way long and kinda shaped funny and there doesn't really seem to be much in the way of a consistant light source, highlights nor shadows.
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Also, another photo, trying with teeeny aperture and long exposure (F22, 13 bloody seconds):
Something like this:
Yeah, looking at it again, I totally agree. I wish I'd run this through more drafts before hand to tighten up the sequence. Damn it I wish my Uni gave any sort of constructive crits like this forum does, but mostly tutorials consist of:
"How are you doing with the work? Wait, what, you're actually DOING it? I see. Well, that's alright then."
I don't think they expect much of first years at all. Turning up sober and wearing both shoes and a shirt will get you at least a 40% mark.
Just playing with the sequence again, maybe this is getting better?
Since we no longer have the laser-eyes killing the butterfly, I don't see the benefit to the new last panel (closeup of squinting).
Does this make sense?
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Be careful with your lettering; right now it’s very hard to read because the characters are both tracked and leaded too tightly. Ten units of tracking and two points of leading would make the text much more legible.