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Kind of a Dumb Sex Question

MatthasnopantsMatthasnopants Registered User regular
edited April 2007 in Help / Advice Forum
My girlfriend and I just had sex and while I was taking off the condom my hand was on my penis. After that I fingered her some until I realized what I was doing and that it was a bad idea. She had been off the pill for a few weeks but is starting it again tonight. Do I have anything to really be worried about? She got off her period last wednesday if that's relevant.

Matthasnopants on

Posts

  • Sci-Fi WasabiSci-Fi Wasabi Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    The odds are with you on this one, there is very VERY little chance she got pregnant off of that. I would only worry if you had gobfuls of spooge on your hand and then just went at it.

    What comforted me during a recent "pregnancy scare" was to remember that some people have sex without condoms over and over and only rely on pulling out as their contraception, and most of the time the girl STILL doesn't get pregnant. While not the recommended course of action, it still helped me to remember that even under perfect circumstances, impregnating a woman can be hard.

    Honestly, try not to worry.

    Sci-Fi Wasabi on
    sci+fi+wasabi.png
  • MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    edited April 2007
    So, the question is: Can I get a girl pregnant by fingering her while there is sperm on my fingers?

    The answer: No, no you cannot.

    MegaMan001 on
    I am in the business of saving lives.
  • MittenMitten Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Well, yes you can, although it is perhaps not likely.

    Mitten on
  • coma whitecoma white Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    The odds are with you on this one, there is very VERY little chance she got pregnant off of that. I would only worry if you had gobfuls of spooge on your hand and then just went at it.

    What comforted me during a recent "pregnancy scare" was to remember that some people have sex without condoms over and over and only rely on pulling out as their contraception, and most of the time the girl STILL doesn't get pregnant. While not the recommended course of action, it still helped me to remember that even under perfect circumstances, impregnating a woman can be hard.

    Honestly, try not to worry.

    it kind of sounds like you're saying "don't worry, because plenty of other people don't get pregnant when they do worse things, so you should be okay!" which is awful advice

    that's obviously not what you're saying, but someone could mistake it for that

    coma white on
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  • Sci-Fi WasabiSci-Fi Wasabi Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    coma white wrote: »
    The odds are with you on this one, there is very VERY little chance she got pregnant off of that. I would only worry if you had gobfuls of spooge on your hand and then just went at it.

    What comforted me during a recent "pregnancy scare" was to remember that some people have sex without condoms over and over and only rely on pulling out as their contraception, and most of the time the girl STILL doesn't get pregnant. While not the recommended course of action, it still helped me to remember that even under perfect circumstances, impregnating a woman can be hard.

    Honestly, try not to worry.

    it kind of sounds like you're saying "don't worry, because plenty of other people don't get pregnant when they do worse things, so you should be okay!" which is awful advice

    that's obviously not what you're saying, but someone could mistake it for that

    You're right. matthasnopants is smart enough to wear condoms every time during intercourse, I thought outlining the odds would help him relax.

    Nothing is worse in this situation than panicking.

    Sci-Fi Wasabi on
    sci+fi+wasabi.png
  • MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Bitch wrote: »
    Well, yes you can, although it is perhaps not likely.

    That's like saying "Well, anything can happen."

    Getting pregnant by having sperm-covered fingers is similar to the chances of becoming pregnant if a guy ejaculates into a bath you currently are laying in. They are so astronomically small that if pregnancy were to occur you may as well consider it immaculate conception.

    MegaMan001 on
    I am in the business of saving lives.
  • coma whitecoma white Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    "damn, this baby was meant to be!"

    coma white on
    closuresig.jpg
  • CyberkruzCyberkruz Registered User new member
    edited April 2007
    The odds are with you on this one, there is very VERY little chance she got pregnant off of that. I would only worry if you had gobfuls of spooge on your hand and then just went at it.

    What comforted me during a recent "pregnancy scare" was to remember that some people have sex without condoms over and over and only rely on pulling out as their contraception, and most of the time the girl STILL doesn't get pregnant. While not the recommended course of action, it still helped me to remember that even under perfect circumstances, impregnating a woman can be hard.

    Honestly, try not to worry.

    I would have to agree. My cousin relies on "pulling out" as his contraceptive. He has been doing it for 4 years or so now with a steady gf. Although I don't think it is very smart, he still hasn't gotten her pregnant.

    Cyberkruz on
  • ege02ege02 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2007
    MegaMan001 wrote: »
    Bitch wrote: »
    Well, yes you can, although it is perhaps not likely.

    That's like saying "Well, anything can happen."

    Getting pregnant by having sperm-covered fingers is similar to the chances of becoming pregnant if a guy ejaculates into a bath you currently are laying in. They are so astronomically small that if pregnancy were to occur you may as well consider it immaculate conception.

    Those two odds are nowhere similar.

    ege02 on
  • Gabriel_PittGabriel_Pitt (effective against Russian warships) Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    MegaMan001 wrote: »
    Bitch wrote: »
    Well, yes you can, although it is perhaps not likely.

    That's like saying "Well, anything can happen."

    Getting pregnant by having sperm-covered fingers is similar to the chances of becoming pregnant if a guy ejaculates into a bath you currently are laying in. They are so astronomically small that if pregnancy were to occur you may as well consider it immaculate conception.

    Dude, get your head out of your ass. That finger is directly introducing semen into the body.

    Gabriel_Pitt on
  • MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    edited April 2007
    MegaMan001 wrote: »
    Bitch wrote: »
    Well, yes you can, although it is perhaps not likely.

    That's like saying "Well, anything can happen."

    Getting pregnant by having sperm-covered fingers is similar to the chances of becoming pregnant if a guy ejaculates into a bath you currently are laying in. They are so astronomically small that if pregnancy were to occur you may as well consider it immaculate conception.

    Dude, get your head out of your ass. That finger is directly introducing semen into the body.

    Does anyone here actually understand how fertilization actually occurs or are you all just spouting out whatever you remember from high school health class? The knowledge some of you people act like you have about health issues is laughable. I really shudder when responses to real health concerns are so varied and often cited from Wikipedia. So I'll spell it out.

    For conception to occur, the sperm must travel through the vagina, past the cervix, into the uterus, and into the distal third of the fallopian tube. The cervix is a muscular ring around the base of the uterus. This means the average sperm has to travel about 4-5 inches through the vagina, another 2-3 inches of a non-pregnant uterus, and then get into the fallopian tube itself. Which adds another 3-4 inches of travel time. All said, a sperm has to make 9 to 12 inches of distance on its own. While dealing with the acidic environment of the vagina and the vaginal secretions that impede movement. All in all nearly 40-250 MILLION sperm are ejaculated into the vagina - of which roughly fewer than 200 actually reach the fallopian tube.

    Now, in the scenario that the ejaculate has somehow made contact with a finger after removing a condom and reinserted into the vagina will not only lose the seminal fluid protective coating and probably destroy a majority of sperm to begin with due to room temperature.

    I really hate to break it to people, but it's not easy to get pregnant. The idea that you can actually reintroduce sperm into the vagina through your fingers / mouth / toe / ear / whatever else you feel like sticking in a girls vagina and somehow magically make someone pregnant is so astronomically unlikely that to worry about it is absurd. Believe me, if it was that easy then a lot of fertility clinics would be out of business.

    And, Gabriel_Pitt, I really highly suggest you read a book - attend some measure of prenatal educational classes or seek other instruction on this topic before telling an educated medical professional to get his head out of his ass about topics you don't understand.

    MegaMan001 on
    I am in the business of saving lives.
  • ben0207ben0207 Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Offtopic, but why is everyone on this board so shit-terrified of the slightest chance of being pregnant?

    I mean, even in the unlikely chance one ever did have an unwanted pregnancy from a meaningless fumble, it's not as if there isn't a perfectly reasonable solution.

    ben0207 on
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    You mean abortion? Maybe because even pro-choice people find that route unpleasant? *boggle*

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • Chief1138Chief1138 Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Abortion is not a walk in the park. And it isn't cheap either. Better to do what you can to prevent it beforehand.

    Chief1138 on
  • MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    edited April 2007
    ben0207 wrote: »
    Offtopic, but why is everyone on this board so shit-terrified of the slightest chance of being pregnant?

    I mean, even in the unlikely chance one ever did have an unwanted pregnancy from a meaningless fumble, it's not as if there isn't a perfectly reasonable solution.

    Because an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure? Not every girl / guy wants to have an abortion? Some don't believe in it? Because it's easier to just wrap your tool?

    MegaMan001 on
    I am in the business of saving lives.
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Also, being a guy, I'm shit-terrified of getting pregnant for obvious biological reasons.

    And MegaMan001: I think your analogy is very flawed and misleading. It IS possible however unlikely to get a girl pregnant by finger-fucking her with a sperm-encrusted finger. It is IMpossible to get a girl pregnant by spunking in her bathtub. I understand you're trying to assuage the OP's doubts because he most likely has nothing to worry about, but what you said is rather misleading. Improbable and impossible are not the same thing.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • ben0207ben0207 Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    MegaMan001 wrote: »
    ben0207 wrote: »
    Offtopic, but why is everyone on this board so shit-terrified of the slightest chance of being pregnant?

    I mean, even in the unlikely chance one ever did have an unwanted pregnancy from a meaningless fumble, it's not as if there isn't a perfectly reasonable solution.

    Because an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure? Not every girl / guy wants to have an abortion? Some don't believe in it? Because it's easier to just wrap your tool?

    I'm not in any way promoting unsafe sex, its just we seem to have a lot of posts like:

    "HAY GUYZ I LOOKT AT A GRIL FOR MOER THAN A MINUTE IS SHE PREGNANT NOW KTHXBAI"

    And it's just a bit ridiculous.

    ben0207 on
  • MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Drez wrote: »
    Also, being a guy, I'm shit-terrified of getting pregnant for obvious biological reasons.

    And MegaMan001: I think your analogy is very flawed and misleading. It IS possible however unlikely to get a girl pregnant by finger-fucking her with a sperm-encrusted finger. It is IMpossible to get a girl pregnant by spunking in her bathtub. I understand you're trying to assuage the OP's doubts because he most likely has nothing to worry about, but what you said is rather misleading. Improbable and impossible are not the same thing.

    Can you show any studies where fingering a girl with a sperm-encrusted finger lead to pregnancy? Any scholarly articles or reliable sources? Similarly, can you show any evidence that proves that it is IMPOSSIBLE to get pregnant by ejaculating in some bathwater? Seriously, the amount of misinformation on these boards about health issues is ridiculous. Unless you've got a license to back yourself up or are going on something other than "what seems possible" I'm not buying what you declare to be possible or impossible.

    I could make a similar claim about bathwater pregnancy that you've made about the OP's issue. Sperm are capable of being motile in fluids, if the bath water was at room temperature and the right pH while the sperm is introduced near the vaginal opening, then yeah, a sperm could as likely swim into the vagina and through the maze of female structures as I've discussed above and achieve pregnancy. It's just as fucking unlikely as the OP's issue, but just as possible.

    My point is, that in situations like this (as well as most other medical scenarios), everything is possible. Taking Tylenol could possibly lead to complete liver failure in as little as one dose in the right patient. Eating as little as one cheeseburger could result in enough cholesterol buildup to lead to a cerebral vascular accident or a myocardial infarction (provided the patient doesn't have the enzymes to break down fatty acids). This is why you go to medical professionals to ask them what is probable and not probable.

    I'm saying this. The chance of impregnating your girlfriend with any implement slatthered with ejaculate and replaced into her vagina is the same as getting pregnant by laying in a pool of sperm.
    By your guys' argument, sperm are capable of being motile in fluids, if the bath water was at room temperature and the right pH while the sperm is introduced near the vaginal opening, then yeah, a sperm could as likely swim into the vagina and through the maze of female structures as I've discussed above and achieve pregnancy. It's just as fucking unlikely as the OP's issue, but just as possible.

    My point is, that in situations like this, "so incredibly unfucking improbable" is the same as impossible.

    MegaMan001 on
    I am in the business of saving lives.
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    ben0207 wrote: »
    MegaMan001 wrote: »
    ben0207 wrote: »
    Offtopic, but why is everyone on this board so shit-terrified of the slightest chance of being pregnant?

    I mean, even in the unlikely chance one ever did have an unwanted pregnancy from a meaningless fumble, it's not as if there isn't a perfectly reasonable solution.

    Because an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure? Not every girl / guy wants to have an abortion? Some don't believe in it? Because it's easier to just wrap your tool?

    I'm not in any way promoting unsafe sex, its just we seem to have a lot of posts like:

    "HAY GUYZ I LOOKT AT A GRIL FOR MOER THAN A MINUTE IS SHE PREGNANT NOW KTHXBAI"

    And it's just a bit ridiculous.

    Yes, that WOULD be ridiculous, but that's not what you asked. You asked why everyone on this board is "shit-terrified of the slightest chance of being pregnant" if there's some sort of fail-safe and the reason is this: people don't want to resort to the fail-safe unless they have to.

    Now you're just trying to pretend you asked/said something different. And nobody asks that kind of shit...people have legitimate concerns that may be a product of ignorance or -

    You know what, fuck it. There's no point. Your post was dumb. The end.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • Suicide SlydeSuicide Slyde Haunts your dreams of mountains sunk below the seaRegistered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Pulling out does not work, I know this personally.

    However, the chances are so low of impregnating a girl through... what the hell is this even called, finger insemination?... anyway, it's low due to the many environmental factors that kill the sperm and I wouldn't worry about it.

    When is it time to worry? When her boobs get big, she hasn't had her period, and the test comes out positive.

    Suicide Slyde on
  • MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Drez wrote: »
    Also, being a guy, I'm shit-terrified of getting pregnant for obvious biological reasons.

    And MegaMan001: I think your analogy is very flawed and misleading. It IS possible however unlikely to get a girl pregnant by finger-fucking her with a sperm-encrusted finger. It is IMpossible to get a girl pregnant by spunking in her bathtub. I understand you're trying to assuage the OP's doubts because he most likely has nothing to worry about, but what you said is rather misleading. Improbable and impossible are not the same thing.

    Can you show any studies where fingering a girl with a sperm-encrusted finger lead to pregnancy? Any scholarly articles or reliable sources? Similarly, can you show any evidence that proves that it is IMPOSSIBLE to get pregnant by ejaculating in some bathwater? Seriously, the amount of misinformation on these boards about health issues is ridiculous. Unless you've got a license to back yourself up or are going on something other than "what seems possible" I'm not buying what you declare to be possible or impossible.

    I could make a similar claim about bathwater pregnancy that you've made about the OP's issue. Sperm are capable of being motile in fluids, if the bath water was at room temperature and the right pH while the sperm is introduced near the vaginal opening, then yeah, a sperm could as likely swim into the vagina and through the maze of female structures as I've discussed above and achieve pregnancy. It's just as fucking unlikely as the OP's issue, but just as possible.

    My point is, that in situations like this (as well as most other medical scenarios), everything is possible. Taking Tylenol could possibly lead to complete liver failure in as little as one dose in the right patient. Eating as little as one cheeseburger could result in enough cholesterol buildup to lead to a cerebral vascular accident or a myocardial infarction (provided the patient doesn't have the enzymes to break down fatty acids). This is why you go to medical professionals to ask them what is probable and not probable.

    I'm saying this. The chance of impregnating your girlfriend with any implement slatthered with ejaculate and replaced into her vagina is the same as getting pregnant by laying in a pool of sperm. Zero.

    EDIT: I'm just making the distinction that while something may be scientifically possible, such as total hepatic failure from normal Tylenol dosage, to the probability of it actually happening - which is zero. If a patient comes into my clinic and asks "I accidentally got jizz on my hand and then fingered my girlfriend - can she get pregnant" - I am not going to say "Yes, that is absolutely possible. She's possibly pregnant right now". Rather you take all the information given (such as with the OP) and render a Yes or No answer based on probability. So, the answer would be no.

    Similarly, when a patient asks if they could die on a medication (which is pretty much EVERY medication) you do not tell them "Yes, it's possible".

    MegaMan001 on
    I am in the business of saving lives.
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    MegaMan001 wrote: »
    Drez wrote: »
    Also, being a guy, I'm shit-terrified of getting pregnant for obvious biological reasons.

    And MegaMan001: I think your analogy is very flawed and misleading. It IS possible however unlikely to get a girl pregnant by finger-fucking her with a sperm-encrusted finger. It is IMpossible to get a girl pregnant by spunking in her bathtub. I understand you're trying to assuage the OP's doubts because he most likely has nothing to worry about, but what you said is rather misleading. Improbable and impossible are not the same thing.

    Can you show any studies where fingering a girl with a sperm-encrusted finger lead to pregnancy? Any scholarly articles or reliable sources? Similarly, can you show any evidence that proves that it is IMPOSSIBLE to get pregnant by ejaculating in some bathwater? Seriously, the amount of misinformation on these boards about health issues is ridiculous. Unless you've got a license to back yourself up or are going on something other than "what seems possible" I'm not buying what you declare to be possible or impossible.

    I could make a similar claim about bathwater pregnancy that you've made about the OP's issue. Sperm are capable of being motile in fluids, if the bath water was at room temperature and the right pH while the sperm is introduced near the vaginal opening, then yeah, a sperm could as likely swim into the vagina and through the maze of female structures as I've discussed above and achieve pregnancy. It's just as fucking unlikely as the OP's issue, but just as possible.

    My point is, that in situations like this (as well as most other medical scenarios), everything is possible. Taking Tylenol could possibly lead to complete liver failure in as little as one dose in the right patient. Eating as little as one cheeseburger could result in enough cholesterol buildup to lead to a cerebral vascular accident or a myocardial infarction (provided the patient doesn't have the enzymes to break down fatty acids). This is why you go to medical professionals to ask them what is probable and not probable.

    I'm saying this. The chance of impregnating your girlfriend with any implement slatthered with ejaculate and replaced into her vagina is the same as getting pregnant by laying in a pool of sperm. Zero.

    Look, this is Help/Advice. It's a bad idea to slather something in sperm and stick it in your vagina. The probability is not zero as you claim. Sperm can live in the open air, and you can get someone pregnant by delivering the sperm to the vagina in the manner discussed in the OP. It may be of near-negligible probability, but it is still possible. If you want to debate our collective ignorance, go somewhere else, like D&D, or start a new thread here. As far as I'm concerned though, your "education" is unhelpful and unproductive. Up until your last paragraph I was kind of nodding along with you, but as soon as you said the chance is zero? Well then you can just get the fuck out of here, because that isn't true. Lies do not make for good advice.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Wow, ok. Advice is only welcome here if it is given on the basis of being possible? Well then, I'll take my education elsewhere. I wasn't aware that informed advice wasn't allowed.

    MegaMan001 on
    I am in the business of saving lives.
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    MegaMan001 wrote: »
    EDIT: I'm just making the distinction that while something may be scientifically possible, such as total hepatic failure from normal Tylenol dosage, to the probability of it actually happening - which is zero. If a patient comes into my clinic and asks "I accidentally got jizz on my hand and then fingered my girlfriend - can she get pregnant" - I am not going to say "Yes, that is absolutely possible. She's possibly pregnant right now". Rather you take all the information given (such as with the OP) and render a Yes or No answer based on probability. So, the answer would be no.

    Similarly, when a patient asks if they could die on a medication (which is pretty much EVERY medication) you do not tell them "Yes, it's possible".

    OK. But you're not a doctor, the OP isn't a patient, and he's not asking for your "bedside manner" which is what you're talking about. The doctor is lying in that case. Yes, lying. And rightly so.

    However, you are also lying here in this thread. And less rightly so. A lot less. In fact, wrongly so. Because unlikely is not the same thing as zero. End of story.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • DondumsDondums Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    I think you're safe.
    Unless you have some really long and thin fingers, or your manjuice is more potent than battery acid. Or something.

    Dondums on
    internet
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    MegaMan001 wrote: »
    Wow, ok. Advice is only welcome here if it is given on the basis of being possible? Well then, I'll take my education elsewhere. I wasn't aware that informed advice wasn't allowed.

    Well I'm no mod, but I'd say that arguing that slathering something in sperm and jamming it in your vagina is "safe" is pretty bad advice regardless of the probabilities involved.

    Oh and educated opinion is certainly welcome, when it isn't jammed down our throat like so:
    Does anyone here actually understand how fertilization actually occurs or are you all just spouting out whatever you remember from high school health class? The knowledge some of you people act like you have about health issues is laughable. I really shudder when responses to real health concerns are so varied and often cited from Wikipedia. So I'll spell it out.

    Maybe drop the bullshit superiority complex and you'll be given more credence.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • ViolentChemistryViolentChemistry __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2007
    Why don't you both shut up before I fuck your mom with a popsicle-stick slathered in hot white mansauce?

    ViolentChemistry on
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Why don't you both shut up before I fuck your mom with a popsicle-stick slathered in hot white mansauce?

    No thank you (on the popsicle offer). I don't want her to get pregnant.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • TiemlerTiemler Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    Bitch wrote: »
    Well, yes you can, although it is perhaps not likely.

    And Bush could convert to Islam.

    The minute I saw this title, I fucking knew it'd be another "did I just knock my girl up?" thread.

    Tiemler on
  • Pants ManPants Man Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    uh, manually inserting sperm into a vagina is like a gajillion times more likely to get a girl pregnant than jerking it into her bathwater.

    this just in: sperm have tails so they can swim. 5-6 inches is not impossible. likely? nah. but acting like getting some sperm on your hand and then inserting into a woman ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT GET HER KNOCKED UP is insane.

    Pants Man on
    "okay byron, my grandma has a right to be happy, so i give you my blessing. just... don't get her pregnant. i don't need another mom."
  • EtchEtch Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    It would have been much easier to just say "Yes, she could get pregnant, but the odds are very low that she will."

    Internet tough guys

    Etch on
  • The CatThe Cat Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited April 2007
    Is there some kind of competition going on over who can make the most unrealistic "OMG IS SHE PREGGERS" thread before incurring the Wrath of Mod in here?

    Go on.

    You can tell me.

    The Cat on
    tmsig.jpg
This discussion has been closed.