WIZARD PEOPLE, DEAR [Mini-PHALLA]
Chapter 1
Privet Drive. The ominous fog makes the night-time even more hoary and mysterious than usual here in suburban Britannia. Out from the shadows of God knows what dimension steps the oldest wizard in the books, the Near-Dead Dumbledore. He is clearly a powerful beast and walks with dignity despite his age and attire. He sees a cat that he knows right before he sets to work. He produces a wizard's tool known as the Street Darkener, and, with a practiced angling of the arm, begins to siphon away the clarity made from mankind's bulbs. Magical deeds are afoot, dear readers, magical darkness a must.
The atmosphere complete, the cat, now protected by shadows, transforms into who else but Professor Hardcastle McCormick, an old friend and ally of Dumbledore, the Half-Dead. She is truly a great wizard, also, and possesses many a skill that might aid in tonight's random errands. They speak gravely of to-night's horrible decision. And, dear readers, trust me, their work tonight is dubious. What are they to do? Are they really going to go through with tonight's desperate plan? The choice is clearly in powerful hands, as Dumbledore ponders with his gigantic brain.
Just then, a light approaches in the clouds. Shredding through the stratus descends no other than Hagar the Horrible, a huge man that, if you didn't know better, you may mistake him for a giant, hairy truck. He is Dumbledore's gofer and now, perched upon his sky leopard, Hagar seems at the end of an errand that has almost bested him.
But lo! out from his manly pap, he produces the most powerful baby in the universe. Dumbledore accepts the swaddled child like the delicate button of an atomic bomb. His bowels tense. No false moves here. Hardcastle McCormick pleads with Dumbledore not to go through with the plan.
What plan, you ask? Well, they are going to leave this veritable weapon of the gods, this paradox of baby-ness and power, right here, on a
frickin' Muggle's doorstep!
But 'shhh', says Dumbledore to the baby, and 'shhh', he says to the lady. As Hagar gnashes his teeth in inner conflict and almost drowns in snotty, fearful tears, his master Dumbledore tells him to wait in the frickin' car if he has to.
And the baby is left, the baby with the most telling of scars, the baby that is the seed of power, the baby that is the inheritor of the horrible, hoary hammer of the gods, Harry, the wizard who was destined to vanquish all evil, and, if he so wish, BRING IT BACK AGAIN!
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone!Game Overview
This is a super vanilla
Phalla game. If you are new, this is probably a great one to join - but it might be a good idea to look over the linked topic for the basics.
The source material Wizard People, Dear Readers which is a parody of Harry Potter (a fake ‘book on tape’ that follows the first movie) should not play any part in knowing what is going on in the game.
Voting:
Each day, vote for a player in
bold red.
Should there be a tie in the vote, then all tied players, plus the player tying the vote, will be eliminated.
Vote close will be at 11 EST. Any votes before the hour (x:59) will count, any votes on the hour and later (x:00) will not.
All players are expected to vote every day. On the second day that you are inactive, Hagar the Horrible will sweep you up on his Sky Leopard and remove you from the game.
Orders
All orders must be submitted before vote close.
Signing Up
Sign up by posting in
bold limegreen.
Clarifications
Any questions about the general game rules may be made by highlighting the question in
bold darkorange text. Answers will be posted in the thread and collected in the below section. Player-specific inquiries that are not addressed in the general rules may be asked via PM to the host.
Other Rules
-Include host in all PM’s and Proboards. No anonymous contact
-No sharing, screenshotting etc. of Host PMs
-If you are eliminated, you can make one ghost post, as long as it has no game information.
-No talking with the dead.
-You may not add players to preexisting PM conversations. Start a new conversation instead.
Sample Villager PM:
A veritable fountain of bird-propelled letters issues forth Into your living room.
You quickly grab a letter, swiftly escape any dumb relatives, and retreat to your room to whisper the contents of the letter to your horses.
'Come to Hogwarts and become a wizard', it says.
Wincon: Eliminate Val-Mart’s Army
Posts
4. enlightendedbum
7. Buddha73
12. Grunt's Ghost
13. Spoit
15. Sir Fabulous
Reserves
1. Phyphor
2.
3.
Day 1
5. TheRoadVirus
6. The Anonymous
18. MrTLicious
21. Preda
Day 2
11. premium
24. Auralynx
25. Iron Weasel
29. Retaba
Day 3
8. Locus
14. ObiFett
19. SLyM
Day 4
1. Cythraul
27. Megafrost
10. jdarksun
Day 5
3. Bedlam
9. Langly
17. Mill
20. Mikey CTS
Day 6
2. Kime
16. undergroundmonorail
28. Thetheroo
30. Egos
Day 7
22. Flarne
23. Assuran
26. Schuss
Island Name: Felinefine
Confusion will be my epitaph
Yeah I went there! (I don't know if this is a contested opinion or not)
Edit: Oh goodness, one paragraph into the OP and I'm struggling not to giggle out loud. So much for my appearance of working
3DS Friend Code: 3110-5393-4113
Steam profile
CAWWWW!
3DS Friend Code: 3110-5393-4113
Steam profile
My patronus is the Bolivian Boner Bison
From the Desk of Darth Vertroue Diplomat to the USA.
3DS: 1289-8447-4695
Edit: Liamegreen is apparently "not a color"
Switch Friend Code: SW-1406-1275-7906
Friend Safari: Fighting - Machoke, Pancham, Riolu | In game name: Jessica
Official Weather Gym Leader of the G+T Pokémon League. @me to try for the Climate Badge!
Done in one.
Sounds like bullshit moogle limitations to me, kupo!
The Division, Warframe (XB1)
GT: Tanith 6227
It's bad for the fabric!
Would you like to hear more? Kupopopo!
<yes> <no>
"What's your name?"
BUTTS_
What was his/her name?
The Division, Warframe (XB1)
GT: Tanith 6227
At the very least I think it would be beneficial to skim the rules of the quidditch mini-game, because I sincerely doubt we'll be able to catch any mafia without putting in some serious effort there.