#pipeCocky Stride, Musky odoursPope of Chili TownRegistered Userregular
They absolutely do overlap, though
I'm not saying it's a fantasy you should be ashamed of, but just like DDV said it includes a certain amount of "not being able to help yourself" and without some pretty serious trust already existing between partners or standing consent for that kind of thing, it can get pretty sketchy pretty quick.
I usually see it as more problematic if the older party has a position of guardianship or authority over the younger rather than it just being an issue of age.
I'm curious: what kind of age gaps do you think are okay and which are kinda iffy?
like for a relationship or just sex
relationship
if you cannot have a conversation with them, then it's iffy
+2
Theodore Flooseveltproud parent of eight beautiful girls and shalmelodorne (which is currently being ruled by a woman (awesome role model for my daughters)) #dornedadRegistered Userregular
well that's why it's all dependent on the exact person! can't really generalize by years-old once you're all adults
'sbout life stages, and all that
I totally agree with this, it can go both ways. My ex was 21 and I'm 25 - even though we were both adults and there wasn't a big age gap between us the difference in maturity was massive (not that I'm saying I'm the height of maturity!)
I usually see it as more problematic if the older party has a position of guardianship or authority over the younger rather than it just being an issue of age.
strong agree
As long as they're consenting adults, dismissing someone purely because of their age is kind of a shitty thing to do. I turn 31 this year and most of the time I could not even comprehend dating a 20 year old, but in reality I'm sure I'd have good relationships with as many 20 year olds as 30 year olds.
My mum was 20 and my dad was 31 when they got married and my mum has always been the mature one out of the two.
I tend to date older, but that's because I'm a cranky old lady at heart. But it's highly dependent on the individual. And it's not just the amount of life experience that matters. Sometimes having vastly different life experiences is a bigger hurdle than a little bit of a maturity difference.
I have decided I will never date anyone younger than me again.
I had a wicked bad breakup and thought this
But @Javen is younger than me and he's the best thing that's ever happened to me
He's also very mature and only like 18 mo younger but still
This is true, right now I'm just feeling very bitter. It'll pass I'm sure.
It totally will.
Plus it just feels good to say stuff like that, it's a good way to vent a little. I keep telling friends I'll never just take everything a gal says on faith again after how my last two relationships went but everyone knows thats silly
I like my partners to at least be able to match me intellectually.
Sarah may be younger than me but she had her master's degree before I'd gotten my bachelor's.
Age plays little part in it but I don't even look at people under the age of 18 the same way I do over 20 with a few years of buffer space added on just to be safe.
One of my coworkers texted me after her and I and a couple of other friends hung out and drank and watched blade runner last week
"Maybe you and I could catch the new Spider-Man this weekend?"
noooooooooo
why nooooot
I'm just not mentally/emotionally capable of doing date stuff right now, really.
I guess that doesn't mean I can't go hang out with someone and have a good time, though
edit: also I've enjoyed having coworker friends and I feel like it'd make things awkward?? But vocalizing my fears just makes me think I'm over thinking it.
Then you should likely check to see if Mr. McAvoy was just asking to hangout because he had a good time last time. Doesn't always mean it is a date.
And to this point: I had to ask one coworker very specifically if what we were on was a date and if we were flirting with each other just to be on the safe side.
One of my coworkers texted me after her and I and a couple of other friends hung out and drank and watched blade runner last week
"Maybe you and I could catch the new Spider-Man this weekend?"
noooooooooo
why nooooot
I'm just not mentally/emotionally capable of doing date stuff right now, really.
I guess that doesn't mean I can't go hang out with someone and have a good time, though
edit: also I've enjoyed having coworker friends and I feel like it'd make things awkward?? But vocalizing my fears just makes me think I'm over thinking it.
Fuck that nonsense. Go see a movie with a girl.
If you feel like it might become weird, talk to her about it.
I'm more hesitant of asking out women younger than me, but as long as they've been out of college a couple years then really there's not anywhere near as big a difference as far as position in life between a typical 25 yr old and a 30 year old compared to, say, a 20 year old and a 25 year old.
On the topic of dating, I wish I could get over my timidness/anxiety when talking to new people so that I could do a better job on those early dates. I know a lot of you guys are super outgoing and this sounds like a dumb problem to have but damn it's hard.
Things like the broken arm on my recent dating attempt sure as hell don't help the problem because now I'm just doubly worried about making myself look like a jackass and it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.
Posts
I'm not saying it's a fantasy you should be ashamed of, but just like DDV said it includes a certain amount of "not being able to help yourself" and without some pretty serious trust already existing between partners or standing consent for that kind of thing, it can get pretty sketchy pretty quick.
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
I agree with the rest of the post though.
like for a relationship or just sex
and 18 year olds are young
relationship
if you cannot have a conversation with them, then it's iffy
well that's why it's all dependent on the exact person! can't really generalize by years-old once you're all adults
'sbout life stages, and all that
the list of people you could see yourself being with is a lot shorter than the people you could see yourself sleeping with, I'd wager
And I'd never date anyone who was a teenager, just as a hard rule. Teenagers are insane in the membrane.
I totally agree with this, it can go both ways. My ex was 21 and I'm 25 - even though we were both adults and there wasn't a big age gap between us the difference in maturity was massive (not that I'm saying I'm the height of maturity!)
strong agree
As long as they're consenting adults, dismissing someone purely because of their age is kind of a shitty thing to do. I turn 31 this year and most of the time I could not even comprehend dating a 20 year old, but in reality I'm sure I'd have good relationships with as many 20 year olds as 30 year olds.
My mum was 20 and my dad was 31 when they got married and my mum has always been the mature one out of the two.
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
I had a wicked bad breakup and thought this
But @Javen is younger than me and he's the best thing that's ever happened to me
He's also very mature and only like 18 mo younger but still
Sheri Baldwin Photography | Facebook | Twitter | Etsy Shop | BUY ME STUFF (updated for 2014!)
"Maybe you and I could catch the new Spider-Man this weekend?"
noooooooooo
This is true, right now I'm just feeling very bitter. It'll pass I'm sure.
yeah but he's a huge nerd
In relationship news, bah and humbug.
hey, me too!
(the bitterness part, not Javen .... (nothing against Javen))
It totally will.
Plus it just feels good to say stuff like that, it's a good way to vent a little. I keep telling friends I'll never just take everything a gal says on faith again after how my last two relationships went but everyone knows thats silly
it's just cathartic to say
Sarah may be younger than me but she had her master's degree before I'd gotten my bachelor's.
Age plays little part in it but I don't even look at people under the age of 18 the same way I do over 20 with a few years of buffer space added on just to be safe.
why nooooot
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
XBox LIVE: Bogestrom | Destiny
PSN: Bogestrom
gay as hell
Indeed. This response, without context, makes little sense.
I'm just not mentally/emotionally capable of doing date stuff right now, really.
I guess that doesn't mean I can't go hang out with someone and have a good time, though
edit: also I've enjoyed having coworker friends and I feel like it'd make things awkward?? But vocalizing my fears just makes me think I'm over thinking it.
And to this point: I had to ask one coworker very specifically if what we were on was a date and if we were flirting with each other just to be on the safe side.
Turns out it was and we were.
She's fucking awesome.
Fuck that nonsense. Go see a movie with a girl.
If you feel like it might become weird, talk to her about it.
Be alive, dogg, you've only got so long.
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
Are you sure about this cause I can make some calls
Sadly McAvoy is married so his loss.
oh go on then GG, you're twisting my arm.
Dating is not filling out legally binding contracts to engage in emotional and sexual relations, it's doing fun stuff with someone cute.
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
On the topic of dating, I wish I could get over my timidness/anxiety when talking to new people so that I could do a better job on those early dates. I know a lot of you guys are super outgoing and this sounds like a dumb problem to have but damn it's hard.
Things like the broken arm on my recent dating attempt sure as hell don't help the problem because now I'm just doubly worried about making myself look like a jackass and it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.
Edit: slow phone posting uuuuugh.
because one of those is worse than the other.