On Trading Hardships
Juicesir
The Boy with the D&D TattooRegistered User regular
The Boy with the D&D TattooRegistered User regular
in Pinny Arcade
So, a couple know parts of this story, and all has been put to rest from the matter, but I wanted to talk about this in a public space in the hopes to firstly bring light to what I think some people may have at one point struggled with, and to secondly openly apologize to all of those who I had been avoiding. I'm gonna try to keep this as short and undramatic as possible, but I think a good lesson can be learned and shared, and I've gotten enough distance from it to talk about it.
The last few months of my life haven't been very good emotionally for me. Starting in September, I had a series of financial setbacks and personal losses that - frankly - made going about my daily business difficult. I have a lot of mental stuff that I deal with (anxiety and depression), and so I began sliding into what was essentially a massive depressive state.
Pins have always been a reprieve for me. I got into trading because I loved the people and the stories, and that thrill of the hunt. And I loved the sense of fulfillment it gave me. It was this little thing that I could control in the world and organize, and it kept me anchored. But by September, after Prime's exhausting pin quest and after getting a full collection for myself, I sort of began questioning whether I should keep doing this.
Before Prime, I had promised to get several people pins, @Chubby Bunny and @pureval being two of them. I tried my best to get him as many of the pins at Prime as I could, but due to the bulk of them, I fell short just a little bit. Being the depressive and out of quite a bit of money, it was then strange when I won a trip to PAX Aus and was suddenly able to go down and get the pins there. If I hadn't won that trip, and hadn't had a lot of help from some family members, I don't think I could have gone down there. But I made it, and it was a blast.
So, it's October now, and I've promised @TheAggroCraig to get him Aus pins. And I go, and I have a great time, and then I come back home and everything falls apart even more for me. My credit card got stolen, a lot of medical expenses piled up. It's all boring stuff, but the gist of it is that at that time, I wasn't even thinking about pins. I was just trying to tread water.
December came, and things kept getting worse, and I kept not sending Chubby and pureval and Craig their pins. I got on the forums less and less. I tried distancing myself, because if I did log on and show myself, they'd know I was a failure, and if I didn't log on, maybe I could scrape together money and get them the pins soon. But things kept spiraling, and I kept playing this weird mind-game of ignoring the problem while trying to fix others, and not communicating with them at all. And for that, I am very sorry.
By January, things got a bit more stable in my life, and mentally I was in a proper place again after some help. Getting together what spare cash I'd saved, I finally sent off the pins (except for Bunny's, cus it's better to give pins in bulk straight to the person than risk them being lost as @Fitzchivalry and I once had a fun time with). So I sent off the pins... but I still didn't say anything to pure or Craig.
Finally, @PedroAsani contacted me. We talked, I told him some of the troubles I was having, and he helped get in touch and confirm that my trading partners were going to get their stuff. In the end, it all worked out.
I don't really have a thesis for all of this. Partly, just putting it here is a form of catharsis for me, and part of the least I can do to apologize for ignoring pin-trading for so long. But really, I think what can be gained from all of this is that... this is a good community. We have a lot of really good people here. They're kind, and they understand hardships. I think a lot of us may go through similar mental stuff, and may have at some points just been overwhelmed with trading. And that's okay.
Because we can reach out and ask for help. Pedro and pure were understanding, and really helpful. I'm certainly not saying to just be lazy with trades, and to not send. But if you're having troubles, the people on this forum are here for you. Part of what I loved seeing as South was all the great and new enthusiasm people had for Pinny Arcade. I got to help one guy get his Kitten Kemper, and sort of moderate the trade. I gave out some fodder pins for new enthusiasts to build their set with. It felt good, and the energy was really good.
I think, sometimes, some of us might get into our heads a bit about other people. And money can be a big issue. But if you have a problem with your trading, the real world comes first. And we all know that.
I don't know what anyone else is going through, or if anyone else has been through something like this. I just think that going forward, I'll be less afraid to be open about my problems I have. Less afraid that I'll get ostracized from the community. In the end, we all sort of want each other to succeed. Seeing someone get their set finally and get a trade they really wanted is not only rewarding for them, but for us to see. It's a good emotional thing.
Sorry for rambling, and for the long read. I just want to say again that I'm super appreciative of all who were involved in my strange little debacle, and that I'm back on my feet now. This is a great community; don't be afraid to reach out.
The last few months of my life haven't been very good emotionally for me. Starting in September, I had a series of financial setbacks and personal losses that - frankly - made going about my daily business difficult. I have a lot of mental stuff that I deal with (anxiety and depression), and so I began sliding into what was essentially a massive depressive state.
Pins have always been a reprieve for me. I got into trading because I loved the people and the stories, and that thrill of the hunt. And I loved the sense of fulfillment it gave me. It was this little thing that I could control in the world and organize, and it kept me anchored. But by September, after Prime's exhausting pin quest and after getting a full collection for myself, I sort of began questioning whether I should keep doing this.
Before Prime, I had promised to get several people pins, @Chubby Bunny and @pureval being two of them. I tried my best to get him as many of the pins at Prime as I could, but due to the bulk of them, I fell short just a little bit. Being the depressive and out of quite a bit of money, it was then strange when I won a trip to PAX Aus and was suddenly able to go down and get the pins there. If I hadn't won that trip, and hadn't had a lot of help from some family members, I don't think I could have gone down there. But I made it, and it was a blast.
So, it's October now, and I've promised @TheAggroCraig to get him Aus pins. And I go, and I have a great time, and then I come back home and everything falls apart even more for me. My credit card got stolen, a lot of medical expenses piled up. It's all boring stuff, but the gist of it is that at that time, I wasn't even thinking about pins. I was just trying to tread water.
December came, and things kept getting worse, and I kept not sending Chubby and pureval and Craig their pins. I got on the forums less and less. I tried distancing myself, because if I did log on and show myself, they'd know I was a failure, and if I didn't log on, maybe I could scrape together money and get them the pins soon. But things kept spiraling, and I kept playing this weird mind-game of ignoring the problem while trying to fix others, and not communicating with them at all. And for that, I am very sorry.
By January, things got a bit more stable in my life, and mentally I was in a proper place again after some help. Getting together what spare cash I'd saved, I finally sent off the pins (except for Bunny's, cus it's better to give pins in bulk straight to the person than risk them being lost as @Fitzchivalry and I once had a fun time with). So I sent off the pins... but I still didn't say anything to pure or Craig.
Finally, @PedroAsani contacted me. We talked, I told him some of the troubles I was having, and he helped get in touch and confirm that my trading partners were going to get their stuff. In the end, it all worked out.
I don't really have a thesis for all of this. Partly, just putting it here is a form of catharsis for me, and part of the least I can do to apologize for ignoring pin-trading for so long. But really, I think what can be gained from all of this is that... this is a good community. We have a lot of really good people here. They're kind, and they understand hardships. I think a lot of us may go through similar mental stuff, and may have at some points just been overwhelmed with trading. And that's okay.
Because we can reach out and ask for help. Pedro and pure were understanding, and really helpful. I'm certainly not saying to just be lazy with trades, and to not send. But if you're having troubles, the people on this forum are here for you. Part of what I loved seeing as South was all the great and new enthusiasm people had for Pinny Arcade. I got to help one guy get his Kitten Kemper, and sort of moderate the trade. I gave out some fodder pins for new enthusiasts to build their set with. It felt good, and the energy was really good.
I think, sometimes, some of us might get into our heads a bit about other people. And money can be a big issue. But if you have a problem with your trading, the real world comes first. And we all know that.
I don't know what anyone else is going through, or if anyone else has been through something like this. I just think that going forward, I'll be less afraid to be open about my problems I have. Less afraid that I'll get ostracized from the community. In the end, we all sort of want each other to succeed. Seeing someone get their set finally and get a trade they really wanted is not only rewarding for them, but for us to see. It's a good emotional thing.
Sorry for rambling, and for the long read. I just want to say again that I'm super appreciative of all who were involved in my strange little debacle, and that I'm back on my feet now. This is a great community; don't be afraid to reach out.
+11
Posts
I think what needs to be stressed is that these Pinny Pals have your back. We all might be a bit pinsane in the membrane but I think everyone cares more about what's important. I think if you just explained your situation then your group would have been totally fine with it. I think most people would say that a persons health is way more important than a hobby. Obviously you get that now and I am glad you are sharing your own experiences and opening up to others that everyone is here to help one another out.
Another year of Prime gone by... commence the struggle!
https://www.pinnypals.com/pals/dchoy
I agree that this is a warm & welcoming community of understanding folks.
Dinotimecopforce.com
Pinny Pals Lanyard
Your story brings to light that hardship doesn't necessarily have to be faced alone and that there is a pin trading community who won't judge. I can only hope it's gets better for you moving forward.
My Pinny Pal's Lanyard
"Players are artists who create their own reality within the game." - Shigeru Miyamoto
Nusquam Findi Factionis
My Digital Pin Lanyard
That guy can be a right dick sometimes. And when he is being a dick, logic doesn't work, which makes it worse. Usually it's a friend or family member telling you that your brain is just being stupid to get you to realize it faster. Glad to hear all is well, @Juicesir.
2015 PAX Prime Omeganaut (I will forever hate Katamari)
There was a thing Facebook, and I wrote in a short survey they asked me to fill out. Bim bam boom: I went to the land of Aus.
Yeah, I didn't believe it at first either.
Did you meet the wizard of Aus?
Another year of Prime gone by... commence the struggle!
https://www.pinnypals.com/pals/dchoy
Does @Manic2k FISHFISHMONKEYHAT THE GREAT AND POWERFUL count?
Pinny Pals Lanyard
Pinny Pals Lanyard
Aaaaand found my new phone background. ^_^
Warn us when NSFW pics are posted !
And on a more serious note Juice - we all have baggage, thats why we fit together so well as a community.
The pin traders are an extension of PAX itself - and I think the banner outside PAXAUS sums it up nicely that we're all in the same boat- "Welcome Home".
every time I see that banner, I almost tear up..
oh boy.. I might have something in my eye now, pardon me.
“I let out a battle cry. Sure, a lot of people might have mistaken it for a sudden yelp of unmanly fear, but trust me. It was a battle cry.”
I got Doc the most when I had long hair. Although this is what the pic looked like before I cropped it:
Pinny Pals Lanyard
Agreed, though I was also tempted by the Bob from Twin Peaks resemblance.
"Damn fine pins!"
Do you really have a Delorean? I've seen a handful of them in bigger cities in my life, but they are still very very rare around here.
http://pinmash.info - Two pins enter, one pins leaves... then the other pin leaves with a lower Elo rating
No i meant my wheelchair. Its practically identical only it doesnt reach remotely close to 88mph or is able to time travel.
Anyways, as I knew it would get brought up eventually...I just thought I'd come out and post something about it. I figure my goal last year was to go to Every PAX, my goal this year is to hopefully get out of debt, even if that means selling my collection to do it.
(And no @fishfishmonkeyhat , I'm not putting the Misprints with the collection.
I really don't want to have to sell anything... I love my huge collection... But I HAVE to start paying things off.
PAX East 2012 Omeganaut. Awesomest. Time. Ever.
I'm sure this was a tough decision, but I am proud of you! I hope you get a good amount for the collection (you might get more if you break it up, you know). Good luck!
Even if the set sells at the starting price about 900ish of that will be going towards those fees.:/
:P
No but that sucks. Good luck.
Pinny Pals Lanyard
I always forget about the fees ... and Yeah, those fees add up really fast ... eBay kind of hides how they charge them. I hate getting the bill a month after I receive the money. I wish they would just take the fees out when you get paid! I've yet to really figure out how much it has cost me to sell on their site.
And a warning to you never switch your location / currency in Ebay...for the last 6 years I get a monthly email with my "bill" and its for GBP -1.40 ...which Ebay is unable to convert / transfer / adjust..it just sits there forever
Sucks I gotta lose a set of PAX South tho.
When did you send it, and what type of shipping was it?
Sometimes shipments to the moon get stuck in customs for as long as a week -- so it might still be OK. Depending on how you sent it, you may also have a tracking number without realizing it. Do you have the customs number from the sheet you had to fill out? It will look something like "LZ447913620US" and when shipping to Australia and Canada, it can be used to track any scans on the package.
http://pinmash.info - Two pins enter, one pins leaves... then the other pin leaves with a lower Elo rating