[Camp Comic] Friday, August 28, 2015 - Campfire Stories #4

DogDog Registered User, Administrator, Vanilla Staff admin
edited August 2015 in Camp Weedonwantcha

image[Camp Comic] Friday, August 28, 2015 - Campfire Stories #4

Campfire Stories #4

Campfire Stories #4

http://campcomic.com/comic/241

Read the full story here


Unknown User on

Posts

  • Android 21 3/7Android 21 3/7 Registered User regular
    I will admit I was expecting the ending to be gorier and require a hospital visit, but still... Wow... What a gut punch.

  • SynDuoSynDuo John A. Galvan Somewhere over a rainbowRegistered User regular
    I feel bad for laughing :') A bittersweet end.

  • briguybriguy Registered User regular
    edited August 2015
    As I was scrolling down, I kept repeating "please don't lose a finger, please don't lose a finger."

    Tiny hats will never not be funny! Cool story. :+1:

    He looks like Solid Snake when he pulls the blindfold up.

    briguy on
    LostNinja
  • zet23tzet23t Registered User new member
    Pure heartlessly evil.

  • SapperSapper Idiot South Central PARegistered User new member
    We used to do that to new privates, with a sledgehammer, a trailer hitch, and their BDU caps.

    I remember one Battalion Commander hollering across the motorpool, "STOP ABUSING YOUR PRIVATES, %^@#&$!" when he caught sight of this prank going down.

  • ZealousChristian24ZealousChristian24 Registered User regular
    And now, the pattern has been restored.

    Anyway, blah blah blah made this account just for this story, we all know the drill. Just wanted to say, you've made something pretty awesome here, and I can't wait for more adventures of our gentle giant Brian, our little Seventeen, and dorky Malachi. Happy trails, and don't get eaten by mountain lions.

  • DunamisDunamis Registered User regular
    ^ Is horrified! Lulz... why would anyone do that!

    I know a family that would go out of their way to get the kids excited about something just to be jerks and laugh at their kids. For instance, they would pull into McDonalds and wait for the kids to get excited, just to drive around and leave...

  • R3testR3test Registered User regular
    When I was young, I had an uncle who would offer me a piece of candy and then eat it himself. My mother told me to kick him "where it hurts" next time he did it, and I did.
    If I had been the one holding that axe and seeing my hat chopped to bits, someone wouldn't have been able to promise to replace it.

  • prime_pmprime_pm Registered User regular
    I wish I could submit my most notorious Campfire Story, but I'm afraid this tale isn't exactly age appropriate. Something about the words "tick" and "crotch."

  • briguybriguy Registered User regular
    edited August 2015
    prime_pm wrote: »
    I wish I could submit my most notorious Campfire Story, but I'm afraid this tale isn't exactly age appropriate. Something about the words "tick" and "crotch."


    Do it! There's no one who hasn't experienced that horror either with ticks, leeches, or both. I think age appropriate went out a while ago.

    briguy on
  • SporadicDuckSporadicDuck Registered User regular
    edited August 2015
    @PRIME_PM

    Those words are awfully familiar...

    *Gets horrible flashback of camping trip ten years ago*

    Please do share your story, though! It sounds like it'll be cringe-worthy and fun! ; D

    SporadicDuck on
  • justplainchipsjustplainchips Registered User new member
    Hey all! This is Brenden from the story.
    I hope you enjoyed my story as much as I enjoyed seeing it here!

    Thanks so much to Katie for an amazing treatment. One detail that I didn't put in the story I sent was that the hat my grandpa got me was a different hat and very nice...but it still was a decade or more later.

    This story gets brought up at nearly every large family gathering to much laughter, mine most of all. My dad gets a bit of a sick feeling in his stomach and a sheepish grimace on his face thinking about it. My grandma still gets super angry and glares at my grandpa. And my grandpa just laughs along with me. :)

  • FireballDragonFireballDragon Registered User regular
    Wow Brenden, your grandpa's a dick.

  • DJoDJo Registered User new member
    OK, I am the terrible father that allowed this to happen....just as depicted (Great Art by the way!!). I still feel terrible about it. When brought up around his grandparents, G'Ma still gets mad, and G'Pa, just sheepishly shakes his head, which is good for laughs. In the end, it has been a story retold and retold, with a lot of laughs. It was a mistake and I would not allow it if I had to do over again. But I just reread it and had some more recollections and laughs.

    To the previous post...while it may seem so, his Grandpa is the furthest thing from a "dick" you could find, it was just poor judgement on all of our parts....I believe he learned this "trick" as a child growing up on the Iron Range of MN in the late '20's or early '30's.

    Sometimes adversity has a way of jogging memories in a good way, as had it not been for this terrible event, this great camping trip would have long ago been forgotten.

  • Peter RoganPeter Rogan Registered User regular
    edited August 2015
    Peter Rogan was warned for this.
    DJO: You may think that confession is good for the soul, but... Knowing this story, I would never hire you for any position of responsibility. I don't care if you claim peer pressure or deference to the old man, you permitted an act of deliberate cruelty when you were in charge. You will never work for me with people under you. You can't be trusted to know what's good for them or the company. As a matter of fact, I would give you a broom and a mop, because I wouldn't trust you to know how to handle dirty dishes.

    You don't vote, do you?

    Tube on
  • briguybriguy Registered User regular
    DJo wrote: »
    OK, I am the terrible father that allowed this to happen....just as depicted (Great Art by the way!!). I still feel terrible about it. When brought up around his grandparents, G'Ma still gets mad, and G'Pa, just sheepishly shakes his head, which is good for laughs. In the end, it has been a story retold and retold, with a lot of laughs. It was a mistake and I would not allow it if I had to do over again. But I just reread it and had some more recollections and laughs.

    To the previous post...while it may seem so, his Grandpa is the furthest thing from a "dick" you could find, it was just poor judgement on all of our parts....I believe he learned this "trick" as a child growing up on the Iron Range of MN in the late '20's or early '30's.

    Sometimes adversity has a way of jogging memories in a good way, as had it not been for this terrible event, this great camping trip would have long ago been forgotten.

    This is something my grandfather would have done. He was raised on a farm, went into the navy, and did some interesting things before I was born. He was not above playing a joke and my dad went right all long with it (he wasn't his son, but he felt like it because my mom's parents acted more like actual parents to him throughout high school).
    His jokes usually caused chaos and it's because of that chaos that we remember events with more clarity and fondness. He sadly passed away in 2008, but whenever he's brought up two things are brought up how much he loved me and my brother and the stuff he did at something we would have forgot long ago.

    Loved the story!

  • SenorBeanSenorBean Registered User new member
    Peter Rogan: Self-righteous much? You've never done anything you regretted? Give me a break.

    LostNinja
  • pxvectorpxvector Registered User new member
    edited August 2015
    @PETERROGAN: Great job telling someone you're not hiring them for a job that doesn't exist and which they have not applied for. I have douche chills.

    pxvector on
  • bandizzzlebandizzzle Registered User regular
    @PETERROGAN: LOL, what a freaking douchebag.

    Are you trying to make him feel bad because YOU wouldn't hire him? Who the fuck are you and why should we care? The answer two those questions is: a douchebag on the net, and we shouldn't.

    Let me tell you, I would never hire you for any position of authority. I don't care if you claim momentary lapse of non-douchebag behavior. You can't be trusted to not act like a douchebag. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't even give you a broom and a mop, because you'd probably think you're too good for that, which you clearly are not as demonstrated by your douchebag comment.

  • briguybriguy Registered User regular
    Guys, it's probably better to just ignore troll comments than give them further attention.

  • motorfireboxmotorfirebox Registered User regular
    Jeez, guys, lighten up.

  • droidurlookn4droidurlookn4 Registered User new member
    DJO / JUSTPLAINCHIPS - If I see y'all at a wedding, funeral, or holiday. I'll say 'hey'. I'm pretty sure we're family.

  • Spman2099Spman2099 Registered User regular
    edited September 2015
    Man, these stories have really led to interesting reactions in the comments section. I mean, my first impression was revulsion. It is an interesting story, but it does blow my mind that a parent could do that to their child. However, I remember my father playing a prank on me, where he placed some horse radish under my nose as he was walking by me, my brain didn't respond nimbly enough and I inadvertently inhaled it. I remember it being an awful, awful pain. I think I was seven or eight at the time. My father was a very gentle, soft-spoken man.

    I guess the moral of the story is that you should never assault your children; mentally, physically, or emotionally. However, we all end up forgiving our father's for their mistakes, as that kind of nonsense is pretty close to inevitable.

    P.s. I would rather lose my favorite hat than snort horseradish again...

    Spman2099 on
  • Talyn RahlTalyn Rahl Registered User regular
    Fuck... I mean I'm okay with the odd prank, I'm even okay when they get a bit harsh...

    but this shit is just Traumatic... What a tool.

  • briguybriguy Registered User regular
    Please don't do this. The comments shouldn't be fighting grounds for this again. There are even other lovely communities hosted on penny-arcade that will let you argue to your heart's content.

    The comments for story #1 were really great and shared interesting stories. Maybe we could try that? You know, for fun?

    hajen
  • Peter RoganPeter Rogan Registered User regular
    SENORBEAN: I haven't done anything this childish and cruel since I was fourteen. Fail to grow up much?

    BANDIZZLE: Finish high school with something higher than a 2.0 and we'll talk.

    Anybody else feel this third-world refugee from responsibility was treated too harshly? Get used to minimum wage; you'll never be worth more than you are now.

  • Peter RoganPeter Rogan Registered User regular
    Get this: Had DJO simply kept his mouth shut, and been the comic ineffective dad of a rather cruel sitcom, that would have been that. He's a joke, a clown, a figure of fun.

    But he revealed himself. And he dug his toe in the dirt and went 'aw shucks' and admitted that when his inhuman father laughs about this attack, he laughs too. This indicates to me a complete lack of any moral rigor or sense of justice. Or even of common humanity. Making a kid chop up a prized possession? If it had been his puppy instead of his hat, I bet some of you creatures would be rolling in the aisles still.

    DJO stands revealed as a man without any basic humanity. He can be easily bullied into cruelty and he doesn't feel remorse. Just a sort of wistfulness. I've run into such people professionally and I've seen what they've done with the people under them. Hats are only the first things chopped, and blindfolds the first thing discarded. These people make you watch you destroy your works and what you count as essential. They'd be evil, except that they're typically doing it to impress an even more cruel senior manager who seems to like (if not always reward) such behavior.

    I don't tolerate such easy weakness and willingness to hurt people. I don't think you should either. DJO is not innocent, and to my mind he is unpunished and possibly uncorrectable. That such people walk the Earth harming other people and not noticing is, to me, intolerable, and worthy of smashing. If you don't see it that way... then go chop up your own puppy. Not because I told you to, but because you like it. And you think there's nothing wrong with that.

  • hajenhajen Registered User regular
    so we're chopping up puppies now... is that the equivalent of playing the 'Hitler' card? are we invoking Godwin's Law? or is acknowledging it tantamount to negating it?
    can we go back to the simpler times of yore, 3 days ago?

    i can't find the cat, can anyone see the hidden kitteh?

    beyond my specious cry for cat finding, i'm doing anything i can to derail this train wreck... wait, that's not quite right.

    so, what about them Seahawks? Go, Seahawks!

  • SunBroSolaireSunBroSolaire Registered User regular
    Someone(you know who you are) in here needs to take a chill pill, it was a dick move but its not like he sold the kid into slavery in a third world country.

    Hajen: Made an account just to try and help you rescue everyone from this tailspin. Now that I'm here though I can't think of one good thing to say about the Seahawks damn. This weather though really, something?

  • YazukiYazuki Registered User regular
    Some people are taking this particular story way too seriously.

    Was it a bit of a cruel prank, as far as pranks go? Yeah, especially on a young kid. Does that make the pranksters bad people? It doesn't sound like it, especially not from the story-teller's perspective. This is the sort of prank that, in hindsight, you realize probably wasn't the best idea, but was funny at the time it was conceived, wasn't funny immediately after it was done, and is funny ten or twenty years later.

    I mean, I've done similarly stupid things, like duct-taping my brother to the couch. That was funny, and it's still funny, because everybody involved thought it was funny.

    But what was worse was jamming his door with a Lego piece so that he couldn't get out of his room. It seemed funny at the time I came up with the idea, but when I saw the impact that it'd had on him (he was sobbing because he was terrified he couldn't get out of his room, and I didn't realize how hard it would actually be to remove the Lego piece from the gap in the door), that made it not-funny. It's one of those pranks that's not funny to recall even ten years later because I remember that was one of the few times I genuinely did something horrible to my older brother, something that was really, really cruel to him.

    I'd never do something like that to him again, and like OP's family, I know better now.

    This hat prank is the prank between those two level of pranks I just outlined: funny when thought of, not funny in practice, funny years later when being told at the family dinner table.

    I think the worst part about this story was the blindfolded-kid-with-an-axe bit, because like someone else, I was thinking, "Oh god, please don't lose a finger, please don't lose a finger!" Fortunately, no fingers were lost.

    Good story, Brendan.

  • SonOfCronSonOfCron Registered User regular
    PETER ROGAN - Do you find this level of moral superiority useful in your junior management position at McDonald's?

  • briguybriguy Registered User regular
    Oh this just reminded me of something my dad used to do. We'd go tubing (a tube pulled by a boat). I was very good at not getting knocked off the tube. To fix this misfortune my dad would let the line go lax and then gun the boat. If you ever wanted to see a kid go flying into the air and hit the water hard that's the way to do it.

    Or if you don't let go of the handle, it's a great way to get dragged in the water and lose a swimsuit. :D

    KatieJRice
  • DublinDublin Registered User regular
    I leave for the weekend, and what do I see when I come back?

    Long passive-aggressive posts from people trying to explain in minute detail how other people should be thinking and behaving.

    Come one, guys and gals... You wanna do this? Go in the comments section of YouTube.

  • FlaxSeedFlaxSeed Registered User regular
    hahaha. That's why reality is stranger than fiction. Those tales are great

  • Peter RoganPeter Rogan Registered User regular
    SONOFCRON: I never worked fast food. I did, however, work at General Motors.

    Hope you enjoy the car they made the day they switched the wiring around so the accelerator won't unstick. Have a nice short day.

  • briguybriguy Registered User regular
    edited August 2015
    Well, I didn't so much get dragged in the water as skipped like a stone. Had a life jacket on, so had to Donald Duck it back to shore.

    That was probably the third time he did it. First two I went flying. Third time I thought I was on to the trick. That was a mistake, haha. After that I learned to let it happen or abandon tube before the line tightened.

    briguy on
  • TubeTube Administrator, ClubPA admin
    Y'all need to chill out and stop acting like arseholes. No further warnings.

    Hobnail wrote: »
    This forum has taken everything from me
    This hurts but I deserve it

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