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Ex boyfriend

nardinekahilnardinekahil Registered User new member
Today I wanna talk about an important topic for me
I am a 17 year old student that lives in Sydney, I am an Arab and specifically I am Lebanese, I fell in love with this guy called Yousef who was Palestinian and in my culture you can't marry someone who is not lebanesene and all Arabs are like that example if your Palestinian you marry a Palestinian if your Algerian you marry an Algerian if your Syrian you marry a Syrian if your Jordanian you marry a Jordanian etc...
My mum had already rearranged my marriage with a different guy I didn't want we broke up for a while and didn't talk but both were desperate for eachother, however, I refused to go with this other guy and wanted to go with my boyfriend but because my mum didn't know about me dating a guy (and if she did she would have killed me cause in my culture u can't date, straight to engagement then marriage) and now I want him BAK but he might move to Canberra permanently
I need someone's advice about wat to do to pull him BAK to me I know he still loves me him and even his mates said it to me but to move on and start a new life he wants to move to Canberra and its soon it's on Wednesday how do I stop him please help

Posts

  • mRahmanimRahmani DetroitRegistered User regular
    Step back and recognize that you're 17, not fully in control of your life yet, and you're probably going to have to let this one go.

    My wife is Lebanese and I'm Iranian. Two different cultures and both of our families are excited about it. But we worked within the rules of our cultures - we met at a wedding, I told my dad about her, and he called her family to arrange a time for the two families to meet and talk about it. I won't say you should definitely follow that model (and I'm sure it will sound ridiculous at best to a lot of the forumers here), but if you're concerned about having a good relationship with your parents and your partner in the Arab culture it might be helpful to keep in mind.

  • EclecticGrooveEclecticGroove Registered User regular
    I'd also add to say that if it is absolutely true that your family is ultra strict and will cause a massive rift if you choose to be with this person... I would do as mRahmani stated. Take a big step back... a hasty choice at 17 about who you want to be with isn't exactly a good idea even under normal circumstances.
    Add in the fact that it might split you away from your family (possibly inevitably, but unless they are abusive this isn't a great time in your life to do that).
    And also add in that this boy is already possibly moving away...
    It all adds up to a really bad idea.

    It may seem like a massive issue to you now, a terrible life changing, world ending event.
    But it's not. You will get over it, and far quicker than you think. The only way it won't be over with quickly is if you force yourself to dwell and obsess over it.

    I'll also throw in that I'm assuming this boy is around your age, which means he would have very little agency in terms of choosing where he lives. He's likely going wherever his parents are going.

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