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The Angelic Horde and You!

MeldingMelding Registered User regular
Angels

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The Extra-dimensional horrors that people seem to think at the good guys.

Angels are, a bizarre thing. Ostensibly we count them among our allies, but that is mostly because on the large scale events we seem to have the same goal of Humanity's Survival. But, on the smaller scale stuff? we are constantly at odds. While perhaps there is wisdom in not opening a portal to another dimension for research, but how are we to learn about demons if we do not have access to them? And perhaps scouring a swamp for a lost artifact of untold power could lead to some problems down the line, but for the time standing it could also end the Novrick Secret War.

As such, we have some details on how to combat angels, but no first hand knowledge of biological functions or really their organization.

But thanks to dark wizards, and other human groups we can't condone the actions of, we have a fair bit of research notes.

So with that in mind, let's discuss some of the functions of Angels.

Angels as we know them are largely artificial beings. While the core "Angel" has an organic root of some kind the bodies they appear with are created in their home plane. While valuable they are entirely disposable. When "slain" the actual angel simply exits the body and moves into a suitable new host.

Typically this is one of those weird burning eye covered wheels seen with them, acting as an angelic waiting room until they can return their home realm and receive a new body. In other instances, such as a commander being slain, they will move into a lower ranking angel to continue having impact in the field. While this seems off putting, it's probably pretty normal to them. Also fallen angels have proven that one body can hold a large host of angels.

The process of creating a new angel body is not known, and the only notes we have on this are, lewd. And likely inaccurate. However, there are references to a forge of creation, while this might be metaphor it might also be a source of angel bodies. It also seems to be what drives the fallen angels into conflict with the, non-fallen angels.

It would seem that the "evil" angels lack access to facilities to create new bodies, so what ever ones they had from before or are able to steal in conflict with other angels are all they have as a collective. While they have tried to use their alligance with the demons to take over other hosts, this has yet to end well for any involved.

In closing, a number of people have asked for information on angels, unfortunately there is very little we can disclose at the moment largely just from lack of research.

In general terms if being confronted by an angel treat them like any extra-dimensional being. They are able to be banished, bound, and tend to not like iron and salt.

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Posts

  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    Melding, there are a variety of different angels though.

    And most don't really look human.

    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
  • TrippyJingTrippyJing Moses supposes his toeses are roses. But Moses supposes erroneously.Registered User regular
    What about Criss Angel?

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  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    Melding, there are a variety of different angels though.

    And most don't really look human.

    yeah, but trying to assign meaning or intent to their forms is kind of, pointless. Since, we don't really know that. I guess I could have included how to tell if you're in the presence of an angel, but it's like the smell of burning hair.

    you just kind of know.
    TrippyJing wrote: »
    What about Criss Angel?

    just a normal mind freak.

  • BahamutZEROBahamutZERO Registered User regular
    ah yes, research

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  • BogeyBogey I'm back, baby! Santa Monica, CAModerator Mod Emeritus
    TrippyJing wrote: »
    What about Criss Angel?
    What about the ones in the outfield?

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  • Butler For Life #1Butler For Life #1 Twinning is WinningRegistered User regular
    but how do I protect myself from angles

    the obtuses have it out for me

  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    Brogey wrote: »
    TrippyJing wrote: »
    What about Criss Angel?
    What about the ones in the outfield?

    They only happen if a boy makes a wish after his biological father makes pennant based promises.

    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    Angels...

    Pffft.

    As if.

    IGNORE MY USERNAME

  • Raijin QuickfootRaijin Quickfoot I'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    What about the guys named Angel?

  • Duke 2.0Duke 2.0 Time Trash Cat Registered User regular
    edited May 2017
    What about (searches list of people with the name angel)

    I guess a lot of pornstars?

    Duke 2.0 on
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  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    What about David boreanaz

  • Kevin CristKevin Crist I make the devil hit his knees and say the 'our father'Registered User regular
  • DarmakDarmak RAGE vympyvvhyc vyctyvyRegistered User regular

    White Chain and Juggernaut Star are tied for my favorite angel. K6BD is just so fuckin cool

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  • Desert LeviathanDesert Leviathan Registered User regular
    In the event that you have an opportunity to fuck an angel, please do not. I have it on good authority that any resulting offspring will turn into a sort of custard beast with no upward limits on its growth, which will eventually ignite the Earth's atmosphere as just a sort of natural consequence of existing within it.
    I'm still not 100% certain what was going on in El Shaddai, actually.

    Realizing lately that I don't really trust or respect basically any of the moderators here. So, good luck with life, friends! Hit me up on Twitter @DesertLeviathan
  • FencingsaxFencingsax It is difficult to get a man to understand, when his salary depends upon his not understanding GNU Terry PratchettRegistered User regular
    Something Something Meg Ryan Nicolas Cage

  • DelzhandDelzhand Registered User, Transition Team regular
    I've had these floating around my hard drive forever, not sure where I found them:

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  • XehalusXehalus Registered User regular
    I heard angels are actually an alien race

  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    @Melding isn't the "proper" term the Angelic Host?

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  • FencingsaxFencingsax It is difficult to get a man to understand, when his salary depends upon his not understanding GNU Terry PratchettRegistered User regular
    @Melding isn't the "proper" term the Angelic Host?

    Choir is the term for a group of Angels.

  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    not a group though, the category as a whole. a bunch of angels is a choir; all angels ever is a (or The) host.

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  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    @Melding isn't the "proper" term the Angelic Host?

    i used to have a bmx, so no.

  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    i... idgi

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  • BrainleechBrainleech 機知に富んだコメントはここにあります Registered User regular
    Really in the mirrors book for WoD it has one of the ideas for a different kind of adventure survivial in a real god like Armageddon where devils and angels fight upon the earthly plain
    It has the tip if the group is able to bring down one of the angels the rest of the host is sure to know they did it and how
    Which was really interesting and frightening
    It gives ideas for the appearance of the angels since they are works of a divine being they would have phallic heads or be a weird monkey-scorpion hybrid wicked fast kind of stuff

  • Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    All I know about angels is that the Los Angeles Angels are the best baseball team and GET IN THE FUCKING ROBOT SHINJI

  • AvalonGuardAvalonGuard Registered User regular
    https://www.angelarium.net

    Don't have any jokes but I have this rad link with a bunch of rad surreal angel art

  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    I'm trying to find an image I saw online a few years ago where an angel-like being was this huge ethereal vaguely human figure that looked like it was a hole in the world through which you could see heaven

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  • NaphtaliNaphtali Hazy + Flow SeaRegistered User regular
    Melding wrote: »
    They are able to be banished, bound, and tend to not like iron and salt.

    You know, I've never really thought about or heard the reason for why extra-dimensional stuff doesn't like iron and salt. Is it because that stuff doesn't exist where they come from, or something else?

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  • NorgothNorgoth cardiffRegistered User regular
    If under attack from angels,

    Call 1-800-BAYONETTA

  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    https://www.angelarium.net

    Don't have any jokes but I have this rad link with a bunch of rad surreal angel art

    welp, I wanna pre-order those books

    but international shipping costs 50 god damned dollars

    and it doesn't look like book depository has those in its catalog

    sadface.jpg

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  • -Tal-Tal Registered User regular
    How can an angel be wheel if wheel has no angles?

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  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    divinity is non euclidean

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  • FencingsaxFencingsax It is difficult to get a man to understand, when his salary depends upon his not understanding GNU Terry PratchettRegistered User regular
    Melding wrote: »

    I thought that's where you were going, but I wasn't sure.

  • TofystedethTofystedeth Registered User regular
    Naphtali wrote: »
    Melding wrote: »
    They are able to be banished, bound, and tend to not like iron and salt.

    You know, I've never really thought about or heard the reason for why extra-dimensional stuff doesn't like iron and salt. Is it because that stuff doesn't exist where they come from, or something else?

    Most extra dimensional beings are powered by fusion, so iron represents the beginning of the end of their life span and causes them emotional distress when they encounter it.

    Salt is just bad for their blood pressure.

    steam_sig.png
  • AvalonGuardAvalonGuard Registered User regular
    https://www.angelarium.net

    Don't have any jokes but I have this rad link with a bunch of rad surreal angel art

    welp, I wanna pre-order those books

    but international shipping costs 50 god damned dollars

    and it doesn't look like book depository has those in its catalog

    sadface.jpg

    Last time I moved I very nearly convinced myself to buy a couple and hang em, but yeah, pricey.

    But man. Maaaaaaaaan.

  • PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    Angelina is pretty cool

  • ElaroElaro Apologetic Registered User regular
    "It is generally agreed among scholars and scientists of the occult that what separates angels, mortals and demons is what is commonly referred to as the existential quotient. For mortals, this quotient is 1; for angels, greater than 1, while for demons, it is less than 1. In layman's terms, this means that angels are more than what they are, ie they stand for more than their existence, while demons are less than what they are, that is, they require more than themselves in order to exist. It is not known why angels and demons are in conflict; some say it is the divine will of G-d, others say that the demons wish to eat the angels, but until we talk to an angel in person, we will never know."
    -p.67, On Metaphysical Nature, Elarot Duvei, Harper-Collins Ed., 2004

    Children's rights are human rights.
  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    Naphtali wrote: »
    Melding wrote: »
    They are able to be banished, bound, and tend to not like iron and salt.

    You know, I've never really thought about or heard the reason for why extra-dimensional stuff doesn't like iron and salt. Is it because that stuff doesn't exist where they come from, or something else?

    from what i understand, it is a metaphorical part of magic. there is apparently more salt and iron here than other places so we rule over it or something? should be noted also that it only applies to things from another reality coming here, and with iron and salt from here.

    iron from the fey dimension doesn't do shit here or there that normal metal wouldn't do against the fey. and going there with iron weapons doesn't really have much of an effect either.

    We're also pretty sure that the different dimensions have stuff that work against us like iron does them, but we're not sure what that is.

  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    That episode of The X-Files with the angel was pretty good.

  • WassermeloneWassermelone Registered User regular
    From my quick google - the cold iron thing seems to come from horseshoes being hung above doorways as good luck charms/wards against spirits/wards against fairies

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