The [Job] thread, when and how to break dance while in an interview

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  • milskimilski Poyo! Registered User regular
    Madican wrote: »
    "Did you know that over in Europe there is a forest spirit called a huldra? It takes the shape of a beautiful woman with a hole in her back that was hollow, she would sometimes trick people into following her to their doom. It was a pretty well-known folklore tale a couple hundred years ago and people would sometimes check a woman they met in the woods, just to make sure she ain't no hollow back girl."

    This joke is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S!
    Auralynx wrote: »
    mcp wrote: »
    This job application questionnaire has a "tell us a funny joke" section.

    I'm reminded of the PATV series where someone told a racist joke or something like that during the hiring process.

    I can say with confidence that I would be 100% ready for this application question. Kinda bummed this isn’t on more applications if for no other reason than to spread the wealth of jokes I’ve stored in my brain in place of actually important and useful information.

    My secret reserve joke might not work well in print.

    There's a kid and his mom, and the kid's been playing outside. Apropos of nothing, the kid asks "Mom, is God everywhere?"

    "Sure," says his Mom.

    "Is God in my stomach?"

    "I guess?" she says.

    "God wants a banana."

    No wait this joke is bananas

    I ate an engineer
  • RoyceSraphimRoyceSraphim Registered User regular
    Regard lus of your job hunt in the puget sound region Khama stupid microphone, there is plenty of contractor work to be found in the area.

  • BlazeFireBlazeFire Registered User regular
    Regard lus of your job hunt in the puget sound region Khama stupid microphone, there is plenty of contractor work to be found in the area.

    The realization that you are using voice-to-text helps me understand your past posts better.

  • EncEnc A Fool with Compassion Pronouns: He, Him, HisRegistered User regular
    And I'm in lockdown again, this time for someone throwing a suspicious white powder in the air in one of the classrooms.

  • EncEnc A Fool with Compassion Pronouns: He, Him, HisRegistered User regular
    Police are searching for a man described as 6’2, white, with blonde hair and wearing a white Miami Heat basketball jersey with red letters and stripes (#6). The suspect stood up in a class that he is not believed to be a student in, and threw powder in the air. Out of an abundance of caution, we evacuated the classroom and the building while we investigate

    Come on people, don't reinforce the Miami Vice tropes in class.

  • BucketmanBucketman Call me SkraggRegistered User regular
    My work just announced that because of a record breaking profit year, and the government tax break that saved them hundreds of millions, that they are giving us bonuses. I won't complain about what amounts to an extra paycheck, but I hate the reason for it

  • Goose!Goose! That's me, honey Show me the way home, honeyRegistered User regular
    Enc wrote: »
    And I'm in lockdown again, this time for someone throwing a suspicious white powder in the air in one of the classrooms.

    Ugh, what a stupid thing to do. Good luck.

  • BucketmanBucketman Call me SkraggRegistered User regular
    3clipse wrote: »
    DrDinosaur wrote: »
    It'd be great if people could just chill when it came to mold

    But no, every time it's gotta be a call thirty minutes before closing about how mold is everywhere in their apartment and it's killing their dog and ruining their life, and we need to address this immediately
    but also they demand they be home for any entry and they're only available for thirty two minutes in the morning

    Just, like, be 20% more reasonable and we can get through this with a minimum of fuss

    what state is this because if it's the American southeast bad news 80% of the matter there is black mold and you're not going to get rid of it

    otherwise like, these people have heard of bleach right

    i'm all for it being on the landlord to fix actual problems but i think part of the unspoken landlord/tenant contract is that as a tenant you at least try to fix the problem before raising it as an issue

    To be fair though black mold can be a serious hazard. I've had some awful experiences with it and a shitty landlord

  • QuantumTurkQuantumTurk Registered User regular
    Naphtali wrote: »
    So we've had the "people listening to music without headphones in the office" debate before. I've got a new one. It's "people listening to music with sound-cancelling headphones and they start singing along to the music outloud, ignorant that everyone else can hear them but not the music".

    The only answer I keep coming back to is drawing and quartering, really.

    We had this person. Telling her that her singing was distracting was enough luckily. Round two would not have been so polite.

  • NaphtaliNaphtali Hazy + Flow SeaRegistered User regular
    Naphtali wrote: »
    So we've had the "people listening to music without headphones in the office" debate before. I've got a new one. It's "people listening to music with sound-cancelling headphones and they start singing along to the music outloud, ignorant that everyone else can hear them but not the music".

    The only answer I keep coming back to is drawing and quartering, really.

    We had this person. Telling her that her singing was distracting was enough luckily. Round two would not have been so polite.

    Tried that. They have no shame

    "oh, heard me did ya?"

    Steam | Nintendo ID: Naphtali | Wish List
  • EncEnc A Fool with Compassion Pronouns: He, Him, HisRegistered User regular
    Now there are two suspects. One was carrying multiple backpacks.

    Dang.

  • jgeisjgeis Registered User regular
    People that don't start a new pot of coffee in the work kitchen after they serve themselves the last of the current pot are criminals and should be prosecuted as such.

  • N1tSt4lkerN1tSt4lker Registered User regular
    Bucketman wrote: »
    3clipse wrote: »
    DrDinosaur wrote: »
    It'd be great if people could just chill when it came to mold

    But no, every time it's gotta be a call thirty minutes before closing about how mold is everywhere in their apartment and it's killing their dog and ruining their life, and we need to address this immediately
    but also they demand they be home for any entry and they're only available for thirty two minutes in the morning

    Just, like, be 20% more reasonable and we can get through this with a minimum of fuss

    what state is this because if it's the American southeast bad news 80% of the matter there is black mold and you're not going to get rid of it

    otherwise like, these people have heard of bleach right

    i'm all for it being on the landlord to fix actual problems but i think part of the unspoken landlord/tenant contract is that as a tenant you at least try to fix the problem before raising it as an issue

    To be fair though black mold can be a serious hazard. I've had some awful experiences with it and a shitty landlord

    Especially if it spreads in/across porous surfaces. That requires a lot more work than just bleach/fungicide.

  • RoyceSraphimRoyceSraphim Registered User regular
    BlazeFire wrote: »
    Regard lus of your job hunt in the puget sound region Khama stupid microphone, there is plenty of contractor work to be found in the area.

    The realization that you are using voice-to-text helps me understand your past posts better.

    Just for that, I'm not releasing my latest E book

  • KyouguKyougu Registered User regular
    Kamiro wrote: »
    Kyougu wrote: »
    Radiation wrote: »
    Kyougu wrote: »
    So last year my job moved to unlimited pto, with the only caveats being that it had to be approved by manager first and that there had to be coverage on the floor (a lot of our business is customer support).

    Today they sent out an email saying that the max time we should be taking is 15 days, ie 3 weeks.

    Granted, I know that's still more than some people may get, but still bs as its not really unlimited anymore. Worse is that we lost a bunch of smaller holidays we used to get off, with the explanation that since we had unlimited pto we could take them off if we really wanted it. And of course, we no longer get pto paid off if we get fired.

    Super annoyed.

    Do they mean 3 weeks at one batch? Because we have that with the unlimited.

    No, 3 weeks total.

    Not only that, but you no longer get normal Holidays off? I get 10 holidays off a year, plus my normal vacation days. So you're really getting a week of vacation plus the option to use your PTO to take holidays that a ton of other people normally get off. I assume if you're sick you have to take PTO as well?

    We still thankfully get the big ones, like 4th of July,, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years Day. But we use to get the smaller ones off like MLK and Veteran's Day.

    Yep, those 15 days are for sick days and vacation days.

  • RoyceSraphimRoyceSraphim Registered User regular
    edited February 2018
    Bucketman wrote: »
    3clipse wrote: »
    DrDinosaur wrote: »
    It'd be great if people could just chill when it came to mold

    But no, every time it's gotta be a call thirty minutes before closing about how mold is everywhere in their apartment and it's killing their dog and ruining their life, and we need to address this immediately
    but also they demand they be home for any entry and they're only available for thirty two minutes in the morning

    Just, like, be 20% more reasonable and we can get through this with a minimum of fuss

    what state is this because if it's the American southeast bad news 80% of the matter there is black mold and you're not going to get rid of it

    otherwise like, these people have heard of bleach right

    i'm all for it being on the landlord to fix actual problems but i think part of the unspoken landlord/tenant contract is that as a tenant you at least try to fix the problem before raising it as an issue

    To be fair though black mold can be a serious hazard. I've had some awful experiences with it and a shitty landlord

    Made it hard to hate my ex wife after the divorce when she discovered that leak in the window turned out to be a wall full of black mold.

    Edit: fuck! Suppose to be a draft

    RoyceSraphim on
  • QuantumTurkQuantumTurk Registered User regular
    Naphtali wrote: »
    Naphtali wrote: »
    So we've had the "people listening to music without headphones in the office" debate before. I've got a new one. It's "people listening to music with sound-cancelling headphones and they start singing along to the music outloud, ignorant that everyone else can hear them but not the music".

    The only answer I keep coming back to is drawing and quartering, really.

    We had this person. Telling her that her singing was distracting was enough luckily. Round two would not have been so polite.

    Tried that. They have no shame

    "oh, heard me did ya?"

    Fire and brimstone.

  • 2 Marcus 2 Ravens2 Marcus 2 Ravens CanadaRegistered User regular
    I've been hired to run a live stream of a medical conference for a local university. Speaker, slideshows, that kind of thing. No one told me what the specific subject of the conference is.

    I have now seen hours of close up pictures of mangled anuses. Fissures, hemorrhoids, maladies of all sorts.

    I'm learning so much!

  • TofystedethTofystedeth Registered User regular
    jgeis wrote: »
    People that don't start a new pot of coffee in the work kitchen after they serve themselves the last of the current pot are criminals and should be prosecuted as such.

    Lately somebody has been removing the grounds filter bag from the coffee maker when it's done and i have no idea why. They're not starting a new pot, they're just throwing away the used stuff. You've already done at least half the work required to make a new pot.
    If you've already opened up the tray, throw a new one in there, slap a pot under the hole and push the button.

    steam_sig.png
  • RoyceSraphimRoyceSraphim Registered User regular
    I've been hired to run a live stream of a medical conference for a local university. Speaker, slideshows, that kind of thing. No one told me what the specific subject of the conference is.

    I have now seen hours of close up pictures of mangled anuses. Fissures, hemorrhoids, maladies of all sorts.

    I'm learning so much!

    Well, I pity the fool that tries to invade your mind

  • EncEnc A Fool with Compassion Pronouns: He, Him, HisRegistered User regular
    So apparently a white kid in a Labron James jersey screamed "IM GONNA JOIN MIAMI HEAT!" after sitting in a class he wasn't part of, then brew a huge handful of baby powder in the air and ran off with a friend who also sat-in into the class. Neither was a member of the class.

    The Police Chief doesn't think its a problem, but due to policy they have to treat it as a hasmat situation. So they are going through the motions and we remain on lockdown.

    Also the two stupid kids are now wanted on felony charges, so great job guys.

  • AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    Kyougu wrote: »
    Karl wrote: »
    Kyougu wrote: »
    Radiation wrote: »
    Kyougu wrote: »
    So last year my job moved to unlimited pto, with the only caveats being that it had to be approved by manager first and that there had to be coverage on the floor (a lot of our business is customer support).

    Today they sent out an email saying that the max time we should be taking is 15 days, ie 3 weeks.

    Granted, I know that's still more than some people may get, but still bs as its not really unlimited anymore. Worse is that we lost a bunch of smaller holidays we used to get off, with the explanation that since we had unlimited pto we could take them off if we really wanted it. And of course, we no longer get pto paid off if we get fired.

    Super annoyed.

    Do they mean 3 weeks at one batch? Because we have that with the unlimited.

    No, 3 weeks total.

    Then it's not unlimited?

    They've literally gone back on what they said they'd do

    Yep! Pretty sure its just their way to get out of having to pay out pto.

    Also to get people to take less of it as well (it's been shown that employees take less time off in "unlimited" PTO systems.)

    XBL: Nox Aeternum / PSN: NoxAeternum / NN:NoxAeternum / Steam: noxaeternum
  • RobonunRobonun It's all fun and games until someone pisses off China Registered User regular
    bless their hearts

  • TofystedethTofystedeth Registered User regular
    Enc wrote: »
    So apparently a white kid in a Labron James jersey screamed "IM GONNA JOIN MIAMI HEAT!" after sitting in a class he wasn't part of, then brew a huge handful of baby powder in the air and ran off with a friend who also sat-in into the class. Neither was a member of the class.

    The Police Chief doesn't think its a problem, but due to policy they have to treat it as a hasmat situation. So they are going through the motions and we remain on lockdown.

    Also the two stupid kids are now wanted on felony charges, so great job guys.

    Do highschoolers commonly have access to anthrax or something?

    steam_sig.png
  • EncEnc A Fool with Compassion Pronouns: He, Him, HisRegistered User regular
    Enc wrote: »
    So apparently a white kid in a Labron James jersey screamed "IM GONNA JOIN MIAMI HEAT!" after sitting in a class he wasn't part of, then brew a huge handful of baby powder in the air and ran off with a friend who also sat-in into the class. Neither was a member of the class.

    The Police Chief doesn't think its a problem, but due to policy they have to treat it as a hasmat situation. So they are going through the motions and we remain on lockdown.

    Also the two stupid kids are now wanted on felony charges, so great job guys.

    Do highschoolers commonly have access to anthrax or something?

    More likely the concern is cocaine or lye.

  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    Apparently work was an absolute nightmare today due to staffing problems due to snow

    As I would have almost certainly been required to go in because I walk it and therefore can't stay at home and claim I'm unable to get to work, I am unbelievably happy that I have this week off

    So gooooood

  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    one of my coworkers said very loudly "I don't think I could bend over that far" (in relation to her hip surgery)

    and I almost shouted down the hall "ayyyy that's what she said"

    I think I spend too much time on the internet.

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • Librarian's ghostLibrarian's ghost Librarian, Ghostbuster, and TimSpork Registered User regular
    bowen wrote: »
    one of my coworkers said very loudly "I don't think I could bend over that far" (in relation to her hip surgery)

    and I almost shouted down the hall "ayyyy that's what she said"

    I think I spend too much time on the internet.

    The English department here says that all the time. Obviously when students aren’t around.

    (Switch Friend Code) SW-4910-9735-6014(PSN) timspork (Steam) timspork (XBox) Timspork


  • N1tSt4lkerN1tSt4lker Registered User regular
    I genuinely struggle to not say it in class sometimes. I failed two times in senior english.

  • DaimarDaimar A Million Feet Tall of Awesome Registered User regular
    bowen wrote: »
    one of my coworkers said very loudly "I don't think I could bend over that far" (in relation to her hip surgery)

    and I almost shouted down the hall "ayyyy that's what she said"

    I think I spend too much time on the internet.

    See, I would have gone with "Your mom can't bend over that far."

    steam_sig.png
  • GrobianGrobian What's on sale? Pliers!Registered User regular
    Just had a mad roadtrip through a snowstorm in Denmark on a business trip. We arrived at our ferry, which was also the last of the day 5 minutes after departure.

    Luckily it was 20 minutes late.

  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Daimar wrote: »
    bowen wrote: »
    one of my coworkers said very loudly "I don't think I could bend over that far" (in relation to her hip surgery)

    and I almost shouted down the hall "ayyyy that's what she said"

    I think I spend too much time on the internet.

    See, I would have gone with "Your mom can't bend over that far."

    I reserve that for my gaming buddies.

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    Hear tell another employee, a pretty lazy one I know, was walked off this week. You don't get walked off for doing a bad job, you get walked off for breaking the law pretty badly. It comes with a ban from the premises and the possibility of criminal charges, depending on what you did. Because ISU knows what you did, they've been watching you for months or years on end gathering evidence. When they make their move you don't even know they're coming until those black vests surround you when you're off-guard and that's game over.

  • DaimarDaimar A Million Feet Tall of Awesome Registered User regular
    Madican wrote: »
    It comes with a ban from the premises and the possibility of criminal charges,

    Is it really a ban from the property if you have the possibility of coming back as an inmate?

    steam_sig.png
  • MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    Daimar wrote: »
    Madican wrote: »
    It comes with a ban from the premises and the possibility of criminal charges,

    Is it really a ban from the property if you have the possibility of coming back as an inmate?

    Fairly sure former employees would not be sent here where people who knew them and are potentially sympathetic would be located.

  • DaimarDaimar A Million Feet Tall of Awesome Registered User regular
    Madican wrote: »
    Daimar wrote: »
    Madican wrote: »
    It comes with a ban from the premises and the possibility of criminal charges,

    Is it really a ban from the property if you have the possibility of coming back as an inmate?

    Fairly sure former employees would not be sent here where people who knew them and are potentially sympathetic would be located.

    Makes sense.

    steam_sig.png
  • El SkidEl Skid The frozen white northRegistered User regular
    Well, looks like I got the job I interviewed for last week! A lateral move with a related team at the same company.

    On the one hand I've been doing the same job for about 7 years, so this'll be a refreshing change of pace, a bit challenging, and a little outside my comfort zone.

    On the other hand it'll be challenging and outside my comfort zone... Why did I do this to myself???

    Welp, too late to back out now- looks like it'll be interesting times ahead! 8-)

  • TurksonTurkson Near the mountains of ColoradoRegistered User regular
    Naphtali wrote: »
    So we've had the "people listening to music without headphones in the office" debate before. I've got a new one. It's "people listening to music with sound-cancelling headphones and they start singing along to the music outloud, ignorant that everyone else can hear them but not the music".

    The only answer I keep coming back to is drawing and quartering, really.

    If it's Bohemian Rhapsody I'm going to sing along.

    Anything else is a war crime.

    oh h*ck
  • MulysaSemproniusMulysaSempronius but also susie nyRegistered User regular
    Drez wrote: »
    This is freaky. Like no one in downtown NYC. Damned if I know what holiday this is though.

    Purim's tomorrow? Things seem normal uptown.

    If that's all there is my friends, then let's keep dancing
  • WeaverWeaver Who are you? What do you want?Registered User regular
    Welp, the flu got me.

This discussion has been closed.