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show me your usenet fan letters
The Green Eyed Monster
i blame hip hopRegistered User regular
i blame hip hopRegistered User regular
I will show you mine:
Dear Mark Ruffalo,
Look -- here's the thing. Yes, you are better looking than me. No, I couldn't really fault a girl for leaving me for you because of this (although she would kinda be a superficial bitch then, wouldn't she?). Yes, your smile is charming and lights up the screen and just makes us all swoon, but I mean really -- do you have to be a talented actor to boot? That's just not really fair, now is it Mark.
So anyway I'd much prefer it if you choose one or the other -- all out hunkiness or respectable acting career -- it worked out just fine for the Heather Grahams and Josh Hartnetts of the world, why you gotta be better than them? -- and please allow us little people some fleeting feelings of self-worth.
Adoringly,
celery77
Dear Mark Ruffalo,
Look -- here's the thing. Yes, you are better looking than me. No, I couldn't really fault a girl for leaving me for you because of this (although she would kinda be a superficial bitch then, wouldn't she?). Yes, your smile is charming and lights up the screen and just makes us all swoon, but I mean really -- do you have to be a talented actor to boot? That's just not really fair, now is it Mark.
So anyway I'd much prefer it if you choose one or the other -- all out hunkiness or respectable acting career -- it worked out just fine for the Heather Grahams and Josh Hartnetts of the world, why you gotta be better than them? -- and please allow us little people some fleeting feelings of self-worth.
Adoringly,
celery77
The Green Eyed Monster on
0
Posts
Jesus christ just fucking stop, would you? Just fucking stop.
Obviously,
celery77
You're awesome and delicious.
Please come back to Australia, we miss you. I know some people said mean things about you, but they're just jealous.
Miss you
Pipe.
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
I like you.
Do you like me?
[]yes [] no
Yours Truly,
celly
I hope you die.
Love,
Lord Dave
It was to Mel Brooks, about 10 months ago.
I had a dream that he was really sick, and that I gave him a painting, and then he felt better.
So I painted his portrait and sent it to him.
Never heard back.
Look, now that the press has died down do I have a shot?
[ ] yes or [ ] yes
Yours
Skull
I ...
..I mean you .. I mean.. don't you...
Don't you ... god, it's useless.
Love,
mully.
I apologize for what Dave said. He doesn't mean it and he was never really my friend anyway. Are you going to the football game on Friday?
c77
thank u 4 the time cube
i truly am educated stupid
luv
moriarty
Will you be my friend?
[]yes []no []fuck off and die you horrible faggot
Love,
Heart
Was he the guy in Zodiac? Because that was fucking excellent.
Maybe he just takes the time to personally respond to every letter but it takes him decades to catch up, like Ringo.
ur gay
luv innernet
Do me and never stop...
msuitepyon
You should marry celery77, you deserve each other.
Also die,
Lord Dave
How in god's name did you get cast in a movie that is not a comedy?
-M
do you want to hug me because I hate Rosario Dawson, or because I love The Simpsons?
either is acceptable I guess
Dear Mountain Dew:
You are so elusive now that Mountain Dew Energy has come out. Why is that? Why can I only ever find Mountain Dew Energy!? Where are you hiding?! IT'S DRIVING ME CRAZY I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE MADNESS!!!
are you kidding me
are you
kidding me
mel brooks
you can't tell me you have something against freaking mel brooks
alright, but only 1 hug
I won't lie -- I'm a little intimidated by women with a more cutting jaw-line than me. I mean that things is wicked! You could like cut steel on that shit! Am I seriously the first guy to tell you that's a little intimidating? I mean what did your brothers say, weren't they a little jealous?
Bemusedly,
cel
If you send that, I will pay for the postage.
I'm the big spoon
I hope you don't die.
Love,
Lord Dave
i confused mel brooks with me gibson
FIFTY LASHES
I got your back Mully
Mel brooks is a living legend and a musical comedy genius.
got something to say Fari? let's dance.
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
who, me?
what?
I hope you make Passion of the Christ 2.
Love,
Heart
I hope you don't die.
Love,
Lord Dave
sry
I was blinded with rage
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
with mel in the title role