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T-minus: Six hours

Bendery It Like BeckhamBendery It Like Beckham HopelessRegistered User regular
edited May 2007 in Social Entropy++
In less then six hours I will be in a hospital. In that hospital they will take a chest X-ray and an EKG... then they possibly an EEG... then they will go and cut open my ball sack.

I'm scared.

Bendery It Like Beckham on
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Posts

  • Zombies Tossed My Salad!Zombies Tossed My Salad! Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    I will pray for your nuts

    Zombies Tossed My Salad! on
  • KnobKnob TURN THE BEAT BACK InternetModerator Mod Emeritus
    edited May 2007
    what is wrong with your oat tote

    Knob on
  • Filler Inc.Filler Inc. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Gettin a ballectomy?

    Whats a ballectomy?

    Filler Inc. on
  • MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    high five

    my heart is all fucked up too

    Moriarty on
    will suck dick for shock images and videos
  • SilmarilSilmaril Mr Ha Ha Hapless. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Reading that I was all, "X-ray....okay, Ekg....alright, eeg.....fine....cut open ball sack......allri.......hey what in the name of fuck?!?!

    Silmaril on
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  • WearingglassesWearingglasses Of the friendly neighborhood variety Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    What is wrong with your jewels, Mr Bendery, that they need an X-ray of your chest?

    Wearingglasses on
  • Bendery It Like BeckhamBendery It Like Beckham Hopeless Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    I have a varicocele

    Pronunciation (var′i-kō-sēl′)

    1. A condition manifested by abnormal dilation of the veins of the spermatic cord, caused by incompetent valves in the internal spermatic vein and resulting in impaired drainage of blood into the spermatic cord veins when the person assumes an upright position.


    It causes pain from mild to severe, and also infertility.

    Bendery It Like Beckham on
  • MuddBuddMuddBudd Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    If I'm not mistaken, they will be running a tube from the veins in his groin up to his heart to operate from the inside.

    I don't know the exact name of the procedure off the top of my head.

    -edit-

    Never mind, wrong.

    MuddBudd on
    There's no plan, there's no race to be run
    The harder the rain, honey, the sweeter the sun.
  • Filler Inc.Filler Inc. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Shit that sucks man, best of luck to your procedure.

    Filler Inc. on
  • Dely AppleDely Apple Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Get vicodin from your doctor, who will be House.

    Also it is lupus.

    Dely Apple on
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  • MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    i have a cyst on my lefty

    Moriarty on
    will suck dick for shock images and videos
  • VixxVixx Valkyrie: prepared! Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    :(

    <3 Bendery, hope you'll be okay!

    Vixx on
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  • WearingglassesWearingglasses Of the friendly neighborhood variety Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Darth Vader wouldn't have no problems with no incompetent valves, he'll strike the fear into them

    That said, I hope you come back with two balls intact. Get a third one if you can.

    Wearingglasses on
  • Bendery It Like BeckhamBendery It Like Beckham Hopeless Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Moriarty wrote: »
    high five

    my heart is all fucked up too

    Well, I'm not getting heart surgery... I just had Brady Cardia (sp?) for a very long time.

    So they have to be careful or... you know. They could kill me. (They've done it before... the fuckers)

    Bendery It Like Beckham on
  • Filler Inc.Filler Inc. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Im part zombie, just my feet. They're decaying and its annoying.

    Filler Inc. on
  • PhonehandPhonehand Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Moriarty wrote: »
    i have a cyst on my lefty

    I think I do too actually

    Phonehand on
    pmdunk.jpg
  • Bendery It Like BeckhamBendery It Like Beckham Hopeless Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Dely Apple wrote: »
    Get vicodin from your doctor, who will be House.

    Also it is lupus.

    My mom has lupus.
    Moriarty wrote:

    i have a cyst on my lefty

    I have one on my right.

    hi5

    Bendery It Like Beckham on
  • KnobKnob TURN THE BEAT BACK InternetModerator Mod Emeritus
    edited May 2007
    all i got out of that was 'incompetant balls'

    Knob on
  • Bendery It Like BeckhamBendery It Like Beckham Hopeless Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Yeah

    Essentially I have dialated veins in making my left nut about the size of a walnut.

    Bendery It Like Beckham on
  • MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    Bendery wrote: »
    Moriarty wrote: »
    high five

    my heart is all fucked up too

    Well, I'm not getting heart surgery... I just had Brady Cardia (sp?) for a very long time.

    So they have to be careful or... you know. They could kill me. (They've done it before... the fuckers)

    i just have a arrhythmia

    prolly didn't help that i used to do lots of coke

    Moriarty on
    will suck dick for shock images and videos
  • RaneadosRaneados police apologist you shouldn't have been there, obviouslyRegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    my ball size concerned me as a kid

    very large, y'see

    but then I grew into them, and it was all cool

    Raneados on
  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Man ouch.

    Ouch man ouch.

    Uriel on
  • Bendery It Like BeckhamBendery It Like Beckham Hopeless Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    it's cool though. I get a week off work and will have nothing better to do but sit around and play video games.

    and do vicodin.

    Bendery It Like Beckham on
  • KnobKnob TURN THE BEAT BACK InternetModerator Mod Emeritus
    edited May 2007
    hold on

    walnut sized balls are bad?




















    uh oh

    Knob on
  • MoriartyMoriarty __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    oops specifically i get prenature ventricular contractions

    Moriarty on
    will suck dick for shock images and videos
  • Bendery It Like BeckhamBendery It Like Beckham Hopeless Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    My heart rate just likes to stay around 45....

    Bendery It Like Beckham on
  • Zombies Tossed My Salad!Zombies Tossed My Salad! Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Man, this sucks major balls for you.

    lwal pun

    Zombies Tossed My Salad! on
  • Jimbo the ImpressiveJimbo the Impressive Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    I hate surgery. I've had surgery on my eye before-I don't know which would be more painful, ball surgery or eye surgery.

    Jimbo the Impressive on
  • turtleantturtleant Gunpla Dad is the best.Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    When I was born the doctors had to release the pressure out of my boys or risk having them rupture.
    I had some interesting baby pictures...

    turtleant on
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  • AirAir Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    i went to a doctor today to get this health certificate filled out
    i had to do it last year as well so the guy was like 'shit you need to get a chest xray okay have you had one before oh cool you got one last year ill just copy down those results'

    then i had a blood test and looked at the vials filling up and its not a great idea to do that cos its not a great sight to see how quickly it gets filled with your own blood

    when i did this last year they told me that apparently its young guys around my age who faint the most or something

    Air on
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  • HomelessHomeless Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    my balls are intact

    sometimes i bend over and they get in the wrong place or something and there's some good pain but otherwise they're happy little guys

    and hospitals suck

    especially childrens hospitals

    Homeless on
  • AshcroftAshcroft LOL The PayloadRegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Sometimes, one of my balls just disappears. Then later, it's back.

    I wonder where it goes.

    Ashcroft on
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  • SilmarilSilmaril Mr Ha Ha Hapless. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Ashcroft wrote: »
    Sometimes, one of my balls just disappears. Then later, it's back.

    I wonder where it goes.

    Narnia.

    Silmaril on
    t9migZb.jpg
  • CangoFettCangoFett Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Air wrote: »
    i went to a doctor today to get this health certificate filled out
    i had to do it last year as well so the guy was like 'shit you need to get a chest xray okay have you had one before oh cool you got one last year ill just copy down those results'

    then i had a blood test and looked at the vials filling up and its not a great idea to do that cos its not a great sight to see how quickly it gets filled with your own blood

    when i did this last year they told me that apparently its young guys around my age who faint the most or something

    Man, I used to cry like a baby when I got a needle.

    When I was 12, the docs thought I had mono, and gave me like 10 mono tests, all negative. Each test needed its own blood sample.

    Turns out, Scarlet Fever. They were really hoping for mono though.

    Neat side effect, I am as afraid of needles as I am of getting my hair cut now. I stare when they stab me, just to make the doctor wonder what the heck my problem is.

    I'll tell you why my problem is.

    Not mono.

    CangoFett on
  • AshcroftAshcroft LOL The PayloadRegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    CangoFett wrote: »
    Air wrote: »
    i went to a doctor today to get this health certificate filled out
    i had to do it last year as well so the guy was like 'shit you need to get a chest xray okay have you had one before oh cool you got one last year ill just copy down those results'

    then i had a blood test and looked at the vials filling up and its not a great idea to do that cos its not a great sight to see how quickly it gets filled with your own blood

    when i did this last year they told me that apparently its young guys around my age who faint the most or something

    Man, I used to cry like a baby when I got a needle.

    When I was 12, the docs thought I had mono, and gave me like 10 mono tests, all negative. Each test needed its own blood sample.

    Turns out, I was just really bored. They were really hoping for mono though.

    Neat side effect, I am as afraid of needles as I am of getting my hair cut now. I stare when they stab me, just to make the doctor wonder what the heck my problem is.

    I'll tell you why my problem is.

    Not mono.

    Ashcroft on
    ZD98Zka.png
  • SilmarilSilmaril Mr Ha Ha Hapless. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    According to my mum, I had a trainee doctor turn the back of my hand into a pin cushion when I was a baby trying to put an IV in.


    I'm fucking terrified of needles now.

    Silmaril on
    t9migZb.jpg
  • AshcroftAshcroft LOL The PayloadRegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Silmaril wrote: »
    According to my mum, I had a trainee doctor turn the back of my hand into a pin cushion when I was a baby trying to put an IV in.


    I'm fucking terrified of needles now.

    Sil I just got Sky HD half price like 2 minutes ago. I'm not sure how.

    Ashcroft on
    ZD98Zka.png
  • FavlaudFavlaud just straight up awful Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    I have had a largely positive experience with all of my surgeries, both major and minor.

    Favlaud on
  • SilmarilSilmaril Mr Ha Ha Hapless. Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Ashcroft wrote: »
    Silmaril wrote: »
    According to my mum, I had a trainee doctor turn the back of my hand into a pin cushion when I was a baby trying to put an IV in.


    I'm fucking terrified of needles now.

    Sil I just got Sky HD half price like 2 minutes ago. I'm not sure how.

    You fucker. fuck fuck fuck.

    work out how.


    I must have for when I move in with my other half in September. My massive HD telly demands it from me!

    Silmaril on
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  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Oh my God, the best BBC interview is ever happening on the News Pod. John Bolton is going all out with this journalist. It is fucking awesome. These two are not fans of each other. Someone else download it.

    Penguin Incarnate on
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