Back in June I was prescribed Klonopin by my doctor; 1 mg in the morning and 1 mg at night. As someone who existed with chronic anxiety for many years the effects of my new medication were very noticeable to the point that I'd believed I'd been cured, but three months later it feels like the effect is waning.
Spoilered for details that some posters may find unnecessary:
I stopped drinking because I had to due to klonopin being very dangerous to mix with alcohol, but more importantly I felt no desire or temptation to drink at all (previously I'd drink beer or some shots of whiskey mixed in soda most days out of the week, but try to limit my consumption to less than 14 drinks a week). I became much more talkative around my family (to the point that my dad commented on it several times; I think he found it annoying), the inexplicable anxiety I felt when I went into stores stopped, and I began casually talking to people I was around during my day with no feelings of anxiety and with the words effortlessly flowing. I used to also find myself thinking of moments in my life I was ashamed of at least once a day, but that stopped, too. On some occasions I used to even idealize self harm and found that I would automatically try to avoid looking at myself in the mirror, but those behaviors stopped, too.
It's been just about three months since I started taking klonopin (and also three months sober from alcohol), and unfortunately it feels like the effect isn't as strong anymore. I still feel better than before I started, but I've found myself having more trouble speaking with others again and starting to feel a hint of that inexplicable anxiety when I go in grocery stores or gas stations, where instead of just effortlessly making small talk with a cashier I'll feel the need to pre-plan what I'll say. Most worryingly, I've also found myself on occasion automatically trying to avoid meeting my gaze in mirrors.
I mentioned these things in my last check-up with my doctor, but the only thing she really said is that we should continue to wait and see how I feel and that if things got worse we could try 3 mg a day, but that she wouldn't allow anything more than that. I'm aware that people who develop tolerance to drugs like klonopin often just start taking more, so I definitely don't want to do that.
Personally (and keep in mind I wouldn't do anything without talking with my doctor first) I'm wondering if I shouldn't decrease my dosage, that my problem is that I'm taking too much and it's causing me to develop a tolerance. Maybe I should only take 1 mg a day, or maybe a 1/2 mg a day, and another 1 mg dose as needed? I know it wouldn't be a good idea to just start taking them "as needed" without a doctor's guidance as withdrawal effects from klonopin can also be serious.
If any of you currently take or have taken klonopin, what mg and dosing instructions do/did you receive from your doctor? From glancing online I see some people say they've been prescribed to only "take as needed", 1mg one to three times per week, etc. My doctor started me off on the dosage routine I'm on now, so I guess she thought my anxiety was severe enough to jump right to 1 mg twice a day. However, I'm also seeing sources say that klonopin should only be taken for a couple of weeks at a time. If that's true I'm wondering why my doctor prescribed me for 1 mg twice a day indefinitely.
I'm asking on here because I want to be equipped with things I could say while talking to my doctor seeing as it's over $100 for a 20 minute telehealth session.
Also, since I'm sure this will probably come up, I've tried therapy at least four times in my life, most recently from about March 2019 to November 2019. Each of the four times was with a different therapist. At this point I think I have more faith that an exorcist could cast a demon of anxiety out of me than I do in a therapist's ability to help me.