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How many people did Shrek shrek before he turned good

PlatyPlaty Registered User regular

How many people did Shrek shrek before he turned good 91 votes

0 - 10
7%
Houk the NamebringerElaroEnlongMr FuzzbuttshoeboxjeddyDr. FlamingocB557 7 votes
11 - 100
6%
Mulletudeph blakePeewiIronKnuckle's GhostJuggernutdiscrider 6 votes
Hundreds
85%
SporkAndrewLegacyNothingDarmakMunkus BeaverMulysaSemproniusRedTidesee317Der Waffle MousGarthorKadithSanderJKMegaMan001Lindsay LohanDelzhandQuidtynicKane Red RobeSonelanchromdom 78 votes
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    3cl1ps33cl1ps3 I will build a labyrinth to house the cheese Registered User regular
    Hundreds
    The swamp grows verdant and lush on that most rich of fertilizers: manflesh

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    MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    In his defense they wouldn't get out of his swamp

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    PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    Shrek 4 is about Shrek yearning for the days of constantly shreking people like a "real ogre"

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    ElaroElaro Apologetic Registered User regular
    0 - 10
    Nah, he's a sweetheart

    Children's rights are human rights.
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    PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    POV: you're getting shreked

    5eldrafe5d8o.png

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    UrielUriel Registered User regular
    Hundreds
    Elaro wrote: »
    Nah, he's a sweetheart

    Good to know you can shrek a handful of people and still qualify as a sweetheart

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    UrielUriel Registered User regular
    Hundreds
    But you know what they say

    Let them who has not shrecked shrek the first shrek

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    KalTorakKalTorak One way or another, they all end up in the Undercity.Registered User regular
    But you know what they say

    check yourself before you shrek yourself

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    EnlongEnlong Registered User regular
    0 - 10
    He had this whole thing in the first movie about scaring people away from his swamp with just the suggestion that he was the kinda shrek who shreked the everloving shrek out of people. He tells Donkeh that he’s sick of people thinking they know him, so he decided “shrek it. If they want to think I’m that kind of shrek, then I’ll act the part so that they shrekin’ leave me alone”.

    That whole idea falls apart if he really was shreking people; it would make that angry mob totally correct.

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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Hundreds
    looking suspiciously at the Shrek apologists in here
    bet you think George W is a nice man who likes to paint, too.

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    ElaroElaro Apologetic Registered User regular
    0 - 10
    Elaro wrote: »
    Nah, he's a sweetheart

    Good to know you can shrek a handful of people and still qualify as a sweetheart

    I'm implying that Shrek shrekked 0 amounts of people.

    Children's rights are human rights.
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    SnicketysnickSnicketysnick The Greatest Hype Man in WesterosRegistered User regular
    Hundreds
    tynic wrote: »
    looking suspiciously at the Shrek apologists in here
    bet you think George W is a nice man who likes to paint, too.

    Shrek has layers

    layers of being an arsehole

    7qmGNt5.png
    D3 Steam #TeamTangent STO
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    ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    Here's a Shrek I sculpted from memory.

    TlsEIaj.png

    I don't remember anything about the movie.

    Does shrek mean eat?

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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
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    EnlongEnlong Registered User regular
    0 - 10
    “Shrek” is a nuanced word. It can mean about as many things as “smurf”. You might say that “shrek” has layers.

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    3cl1ps33cl1ps3 I will build a labyrinth to house the cheese Registered User regular
    Hundreds
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    Here's a Shrek I sculpted from memory.

    TlsEIaj.png

    I don't remember anything about the movie.

    Does shrek mean eat?

    well hello there, new sleep paralysis demon

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    CelloCello Registered User regular
    7

    Steam
    3DS Friend Code: 0216-0898-6512
    Switch Friend Code: SW-7437-1538-7786
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    3cl1ps33cl1ps3 I will build a labyrinth to house the cheese Registered User regular
    Hundreds
    It's interesting that the results so far aren't really an even distribution of guesses but mostly a stark divide between people who think he killed few or no people and people who think Shrek was a walking genocide.

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    KalTorakKalTorak One way or another, they all end up in the Undercity.Registered User regular
    you don't live in a perfect body-disposal ecosystem and not take full advantage

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    facetiousfacetious a wit so dry it shits sandRegistered User regular
    Hundreds
    Platy wrote: »
    POV: you're getting shreked

    5eldrafe5d8o.png

    I need to put this above my bed.

    "I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
    Real strong, facetious.

    Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
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    see317see317 Registered User regular
    Hundreds
    3cl1ps3 wrote: »
    It's interesting that the results so far aren't really an even distribution of guesses but mostly a stark divide between people who think he killed few or no people and people who think Shrek was a walking genocide.

    In retrospect, I should have selected a lower number.

    A Shrek who has shrek'd hundreds would not be advising people to leave him to his peaceful swamp, or put up signs to drive people away from his swamp.
    The Shrek who has shrek'd hundreds would be openly encouraging more to enter his domain, that they may in turn be shrek'd.

    Only a Shrek who regrets those necessary shrekings he's had to shrek would shrek shrek shrek shrek...

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    ChallChall Registered User regular
    Hundreds
    I only picked hundreds because there wasn't an option for thousands.

    Look at the facts:
    -Shrek is a large ogre, he is bigger than most humans
    -Shrek is at least as mature as a 20 year old human, but Ogre maturation could be different
    -Shrek lives in a fetid swampland that is unwanted by human society, so it is probably not sustaining a lot of animal life

    Therefore, I contend that humans make up the large majority of his diet. Since he is so big, he must eat at least 1 human/ week to maintain his Ogre size. Given 1 human per week for a minimum of 20 years, that means he has eaten at least 1,040 humans

    I personally think Shrek probably eats 2 or more humans per week, and he could be much older so he has probably "Shrekked" 2-3 times as many as my estimate.

    Thank you for coming to my TED talk

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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Hundreds
    see317 wrote: »
    3cl1ps3 wrote: »
    It's interesting that the results so far aren't really an even distribution of guesses but mostly a stark divide between people who think he killed few or no people and people who think Shrek was a walking genocide.

    In retrospect, I should have selected a lower number.

    A Shrek who has shrek'd hundreds would not be advising people to leave him to his peaceful swamp, or put up signs to drive people away from his swamp.
    The Shrek who has shrek'd hundreds would be openly encouraging more to enter his domain, that they may in turn be shrek'd.

    Only a Shrek who regrets those necessary shrekings he's had to shrek would shrek shrek shrek shrek...

    People are assholes who are definitely gonna wander in regardless, I see the signs as more of a flow reduction attempt than anything else. Shrek is happy to slaughter anyone who turns up but between the murder and the body disposal you gotta make sure to build in some downtime.

    Shrek is an expert in self-care and knows not to push himself too hard.

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    Captain InertiaCaptain Inertia Registered User regular
    Hundreds
    tynic wrote: »
    looking suspiciously at the Shrek apologists in here
    bet you think George W is a nice man who likes to paint, too.

    Washington Wallace or W

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    PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    How can we say "to shrek" and instantly know what is meant if Shrek never shrekked anybody

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    facetiousfacetious a wit so dry it shits sandRegistered User regular
    edited July 2021
    Hundreds
    I've lived in Virginia for a total of about 4 years now, and this state has the cheapest vanity plates in the country so they're absurdly common.

    I have seen two different cars with different spellings of "Shrekt".

    facetious on
    "I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
    Real strong, facetious.

    Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
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    MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    Hundreds
    It's a fantasy based world with like an unlimited supply of heroes and adventurers.

    He's definitely shreked hundreds, if not thousands, over his lifetime.

    No hero or adventurer listens to the fucking signs.

    I am in the business of saving lives.
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    ChallChall Registered User regular
    Hundreds
    Platy wrote: »
    How can we say "to shrek" and instantly know what is meant if Shrek never shrekked anybody

    It is in a Shrek's nature to Shrek. He could no more cease Shrekking than a fish could stop swimming.

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    BahamutZEROBahamutZERO Registered User, Moderator mod
    Hundreds
    you better check yourself before you shrek yourself

    BahamutZERO.gif
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    ElaroElaro Apologetic Registered User regular
    0 - 10
    MegaMan001 wrote: »
    It's a fantasy based world with like an unlimited supply of heroes and adventurers.

    He's definitely shreked hundreds, if not thousands, over his lifetime.

    No hero or adventurer listens to the fucking signs.

    That's not shrekking! That's self-defense!

    Children's rights are human rights.
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    PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    what's shreks fuck style

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    PinfeldorfPinfeldorf Yeah ZestRegistered User regular
    Hundreds
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    what's shreks fuck style

    Shrek invented amazon style.

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    ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    Shrek My Holes Vol 3

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    I needed anime to post.I needed anime to post. boom Registered User regular
    personally i object to the notion that shrek turned good

    he got laid

    there is a difference

    liEt3nH.png
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    3cl1ps33cl1ps3 I will build a labyrinth to house the cheese Registered User regular
    Hundreds
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    what's shreks fuck style

    Do you really want to know? Because reddit's got you covered if you google it.

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    ChallChall Registered User regular
    Hundreds
    Donkey!

    Haha, remember when he said that?

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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Hundreds
    There's a Adam Hill's bit where he tries to do a scottish accent and then stops himself and says "apparently I only have one scottish accent in me, and it's Shrek shagging Billy Connolly"

    anyway that's what I think of when someone says "Donkey!"

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    MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    Look you know what they say if you shrek ten people it's a tragedy, shrek a hundred people it's a statistic

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    KalTorakKalTorak One way or another, they all end up in the Undercity.Registered User regular
    to shreks, you say? Well, how's his wife holding up?


    ...to shreks, you say

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    EnlongEnlong Registered User regular
    0 - 10
    Chall wrote: »
    I only picked hundreds because there wasn't an option for thousands.

    Look at the facts:
    -Shrek is a large ogre, he is bigger than most humans
    -Shrek is at least as mature as a 20 year old human, but Ogre maturation could be different
    -Shrek lives in a fetid swampland that is unwanted by human society, so it is probably not sustaining a lot of animal life

    Therefore, I contend that humans make up the large majority of his diet. Since he is so big, he must eat at least 1 human/ week to maintain his Ogre size. Given 1 human per week for a minimum of 20 years, that means he has eaten at least 1,040 humans

    I personally think Shrek probably eats 2 or more humans per week, and he could be much older so he has probably "Shrekked" 2-3 times as many as my estimate.

    Thank you for coming to my TED talk

    I contend that humankind does want the swamp land, as they keep trying to take it from him. Or at least, they want Shrek to not get to have the swamp land. Like many conflicts, there’s a portion of spite there, in addition to whatever legitimate reason was initially stated.

    And as we see in the OP, there’s enough wildlife for Shrek to get a healthy dinner by farting into his daily mud bath. If I had to remember that bit, so do you.

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