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The SE++ Bad Game Jam For Weirdos 2023 (SUBMISSION GUIDELINES ADDED 5/4)
Knob
TURN THE BEAT BACKInternetModerator mod
TURN THE BEAT BACKInternetModerator mod
I'm tired of playing polished, quality games released by reputable studios. So here's an opportunity for you nerds to amuse me. We're gonna do a GAME JAM. And the WINNER of the GAME JAM is gonna GET PAID.
SUBMISSION GUIDELINES
When your project is finished, send me a pm including the following:
-Name of the game
-Short description of the project
-Forum handles of all team members
-Link to the game files / hosted page / rulebook / whatever
-Any necessary instructions for installation/assembly
-Preferred method of hot dog delivery
THE RULES
Submit a game to me by 6pm MST Friday, May 5th, 2023.
Work alone, or team up, I don't give a shit. Every member of the team must be part of the community, though. If your account is newer than this post, you're disqualified from participating.
Use whatever the fuck you want. Use Unity or RPG Maker or Construct or Godot or Java or Assembly or whatever Make-An-Asset-Flip phone app/bitcoin miner you found on the Play Store. Make a fuckin' card game out of toilet paper. Make a Lone Wolf Choose Your Own Adventure Battle Book. My 6 year old will be the final arbiter of what counts as a game. If you push the boundaries of sense and send me a photo of a rotting animal and a coupon for 20% off my next purchase of Dulcolax as a game, you're probably boned.
SCORING
Entries will be scored by the following criteria:
0-1 Points: Was everyone on the team's name spelled correctly on the entry?
0-1 Points: Was I able to download the game files without setting off my anti-virus?
0-5 Points: Was I able to launch the game, or assemble the components with minimal frustration?
0-20 Points: An independent panel of judges will review each entry in the style of a short GamePro magazine review, including a final score using GamePro's Game Rating System. Points in this category are based on your average total score from the judges. The panel of judges consists of a selection of people I know in Real Life who have no idea what a Penny Arcade is, plus a selection of volunteer judges from these very forums (assuming anyone volunteers. If not, no sweat.)
0-10 Points: Popularity Contest! All entries will be made available to the public and weighed by FORUM POLL. ProTip: Name your game Joke Option Larlar for a competitive edge.
0-25 Points: How much your entry made me laugh. Yes, it is theoretically possible to get a fat zero in most other categories but still win. Maybe your game crashes, but the crash is the funniest thing I've ever seen. I'm not hosting this contest to find The Best Game, I'm here for the chuckles. Yes, this part of the scoring is unfairly weighted. Tough titties.
PRIZES
1st place: $100 USD
2nd place: $20 USD
Participation Award: Hot Dogs!
I will doordash or mail a package of cheap hot dogs to all participating teams. If you live somewhere where this isn't feasible, you will receive the cash equivalent of 1 package of cheap hot dogs at your local grocer, with the understanding that these funds are only to be used for hot dogs. If you live in a country where hot dogs aren't a thing…fuck, I dunno. We'll figure it out. Maybe move to a country that makes sense.
FAQ AND FINE PRINT
How do I volunteer to be a judge?
Send me a pm explaining why you'd make a good judge. Include at least one (1) pic of a cute baby animal.
What if I'm not good at making games?
I think you wildly misunderstood the point of this contest.
Isn't this exploitative? Why should I do labor for hot dogs?
You shouldn't. This is just a fun forum activity. If participating feels like labor, please don't participate. I want you to have a good time, not stress out.
Why are you so good looking and well endowed?
Genetics, mostly. I don't really work at it or anything.
If a team of 30 forumers wins first prize, do we each get $100?
Jesus christ, fuck, no. I will split it evenly between team members. So think carefully. If you and Forumer X team up to make a shitty game for a weirdo's Internet Contest, and you do 40 hours of coding and Forumer X draws a crude gif of a penis while huffing paint, you're each getting $50. I'm not interested in accidentally creating sore feelings or destroying friendships or anything like that. This is a silly, fun thing.
I am planning on being a salty butthole, fucking over my teammates, trying to rig the system, participating in bad faith, and/or loopholing my way into your $100.
Just…don't. There was a little bit of this the last time I did a forum contest. I'd like to believe it wasn't malicious, but man, it didn't make me feel great. This is just a fun activity thing that doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. Don't be a scumbag.
What if every entry is named 'Joke Option Larlar'?
I reserve the right to append a subtitle of my choosing to duplicate entry names.
A week isn't enough time to make a game!
I know! That's the point!
SUBMISSION GUIDELINES
When your project is finished, send me a pm including the following:
-Name of the game
-Short description of the project
-Forum handles of all team members
-Link to the game files / hosted page / rulebook / whatever
-Any necessary instructions for installation/assembly
-Preferred method of hot dog delivery
THE RULES
Submit a game to me by 6pm MST Friday, May 5th, 2023.
Work alone, or team up, I don't give a shit. Every member of the team must be part of the community, though. If your account is newer than this post, you're disqualified from participating.
Use whatever the fuck you want. Use Unity or RPG Maker or Construct or Godot or Java or Assembly or whatever Make-An-Asset-Flip phone app/bitcoin miner you found on the Play Store. Make a fuckin' card game out of toilet paper. Make a Lone Wolf Choose Your Own Adventure Battle Book. My 6 year old will be the final arbiter of what counts as a game. If you push the boundaries of sense and send me a photo of a rotting animal and a coupon for 20% off my next purchase of Dulcolax as a game, you're probably boned.
SCORING
Entries will be scored by the following criteria:
0-1 Points: Was everyone on the team's name spelled correctly on the entry?
0-1 Points: Was I able to download the game files without setting off my anti-virus?
0-5 Points: Was I able to launch the game, or assemble the components with minimal frustration?
0-20 Points: An independent panel of judges will review each entry in the style of a short GamePro magazine review, including a final score using GamePro's Game Rating System. Points in this category are based on your average total score from the judges. The panel of judges consists of a selection of people I know in Real Life who have no idea what a Penny Arcade is, plus a selection of volunteer judges from these very forums (assuming anyone volunteers. If not, no sweat.)
0-10 Points: Popularity Contest! All entries will be made available to the public and weighed by FORUM POLL. ProTip: Name your game Joke Option Larlar for a competitive edge.
0-25 Points: How much your entry made me laugh. Yes, it is theoretically possible to get a fat zero in most other categories but still win. Maybe your game crashes, but the crash is the funniest thing I've ever seen. I'm not hosting this contest to find The Best Game, I'm here for the chuckles. Yes, this part of the scoring is unfairly weighted. Tough titties.
PRIZES
1st place: $100 USD
2nd place: $20 USD
Participation Award: Hot Dogs!
I will doordash or mail a package of cheap hot dogs to all participating teams. If you live somewhere where this isn't feasible, you will receive the cash equivalent of 1 package of cheap hot dogs at your local grocer, with the understanding that these funds are only to be used for hot dogs. If you live in a country where hot dogs aren't a thing…fuck, I dunno. We'll figure it out. Maybe move to a country that makes sense.
FAQ AND FINE PRINT
How do I volunteer to be a judge?
Send me a pm explaining why you'd make a good judge. Include at least one (1) pic of a cute baby animal.
What if I'm not good at making games?
I think you wildly misunderstood the point of this contest.
Isn't this exploitative? Why should I do labor for hot dogs?
You shouldn't. This is just a fun forum activity. If participating feels like labor, please don't participate. I want you to have a good time, not stress out.
Why are you so good looking and well endowed?
Genetics, mostly. I don't really work at it or anything.
If a team of 30 forumers wins first prize, do we each get $100?
Jesus christ, fuck, no. I will split it evenly between team members. So think carefully. If you and Forumer X team up to make a shitty game for a weirdo's Internet Contest, and you do 40 hours of coding and Forumer X draws a crude gif of a penis while huffing paint, you're each getting $50. I'm not interested in accidentally creating sore feelings or destroying friendships or anything like that. This is a silly, fun thing.
I am planning on being a salty butthole, fucking over my teammates, trying to rig the system, participating in bad faith, and/or loopholing my way into your $100.
Just…don't. There was a little bit of this the last time I did a forum contest. I'd like to believe it wasn't malicious, but man, it didn't make me feel great. This is just a fun activity thing that doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. Don't be a scumbag.
What if every entry is named 'Joke Option Larlar'?
I reserve the right to append a subtitle of my choosing to duplicate entry names.
A week isn't enough time to make a game!
I know! That's the point!
Knob on
+36
This discussion has been closed.
Posts
step 1: make a godawful abomination of a game that makes me laugh
Been ages since I've had a good hot dog.
I'm not suggesting that you sacrifice vital, healing sleep in order to win a package of hot dogs from an internet stranger
But I'm also not not suggesting it
Probably right?
Nobody needs to learn a programming language to participate
You could use the free version of Construct, load one of the tutorial games, replace the sprites with crude mspaint drawings of me and roller derby girls, and then randomly change variables until something hilarious happens
That's a game! A bad game! And that's what we want!
In fact: 5 bonus points to anyone who makes this exact game
The theme for this GAME JAM is: make Knob laugh
an ANALOG GAME is totally acceptable
write one of those super hipster one-page ttrpgs, where everyone has a dream and a goal written on a pieces of paper and three matches and you tell stories at each other and burn your slips of paper to achieve goals and sit in the dark listening to The Smiths and see how far you can get your tongue up your own asshole
I mean, don't write something exactly like one of those because those are the opposite of funny, but if you plant your tongue in your cheek instead of up your butt, there's potential
this thing is a mess of slapdash effort and obvious pandering and I absolutely love it
the bar has been set high
Will you be recording gameplay of these beauties so we can all bask in their glory?
PSN:Furlion
I feel like this really calls for a twitch live stream.
If she's into it, I may spring these monstrosities on my wife and stream her blind reactions.
A note for anyone going this direction: two of the judge categories are for GRAPHICS and SOUND. So I would recommend including a crude drawing and a link to a song I should listen to while playing if you want MAXIMUM POINTS.
THE SIBLINGS OF ADAM
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1BiP_A4FYS31gb15ums526572QF5g0ND2m6633aOn7EA/edit?usp=drivesdk
OBVIOUS HITLER
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1mlz9PeAgamSbjN7RWSVflvHwCNzEWb72XD7_jt4m1PM/edit?usp=drivesdk
It's a third person competitive shooter in which you throw your mustache like a boomerang, with every kill your mustache doubles in size to the point that it completely obscures your vision as you run around the map.
Ideally the mustache would have geometry so that is has to compress and spread while you run through doorways and tunnels.
Different shaped mustaches are available.
Does the mustache count as a hit box, thus also making you more vulnerable?
3DS: 0473-8507-2652
Switch: SW-5185-4991-5118
PSN: AbEntropy
Honestly the hardest part of it has been getting the art sprites in as that's always been by downfall. I'm full of ideas but getting them to look anywhere decent is the stumbling block for me -- but luckily if you're inclined there's an asset store so you can just drag things in. Or go your own way like I did with wikipedia and the built-in sprite editor to add a transparent background to an existing masterpiece.
I decided to ENTER MY OWN CONTEST
I won't be eligible to win, but you bet your ass I'm gonna buy myself some hot dogs
I have an idea.
I may need to spend some time at work figuring out how to DO the idea.
I've been working with it enough that I normalized the name, so this took me WAY too long to get.
this seems like a massive crime
Maybe you can make up a quick game demonstrating what a massive crime this is
Collect many hot dogs
Throw all at Bonk
Whoever gets the most in his holes wins
It's like the stanley parable but way smarter
https://gd.games/knobbonk/the-bonk-parable
then I made an ai review it
What's the best way to share it? It's about 30MB zipped.
When your project is finished, send me a pm including the following:
-Name of the game
-Short description of the project
-Forum handles of all team members
-Link to the game files / hosted page / rulebook / whatever
-Any necessary instructions for installation/assembly
-Preferred method of hot dog delivery