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and another one of these fuckers gets finished, i cant believe its been two years already, youd think by now id have decided how to put them on the web, but in fact i still havent made up my mind about that, this is still pretty much the only place ive posted them. when i put them up i want to combine them with music, so ill have to sort up some thigns first.
this time its a rather simple one i believe. the next one will be dynamite, its the one i wanted to do form day one, but i always was and still am really worried if i can pull off the art for such a complicated one, at all...
I still dont really understand it at all. It doesnt look bad, it hasnt really gotten any better or worse over time, art wise. I just don't understand what the point of each comic is? its like they are all missing just enough story that it makes it confusing.
Im sorry if thats a vauge crit. I actually really like your color choices.
I still dont really understand it at all. It doesnt look bad, it hasnt really gotten any better or worse over time, art wise. I just don't understand what the point of each comic is? its like they are all missing just enough story that it makes it confusing.
Im sorry if thats a vauge crit. I actually really like your color choices.
Seconded. As stand alone art pieces I think they look really cool. I just dont get it.
well, buddy and spirrot are metaphors for body and spirit and considering this it should be everyones own interpretation about what is going on. i know the whole thing is weird, but thats exactly why i planned to make 13 pages and be done with it, since i want to get back to more comprehensive stuff eventually.
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its good and i understand what your going for after i got a chance to look at your explanation.
its just that..well whats the point? i get through reading a page and it doesn't really do anything for me. other than "that was a very well drawn lack of punchline"
i cant give any specific advice off the top of my head, but do you think you could do something more with the comic? maybe present a humorous situation where body and spirit diverge; it would do wonders to grab attention to the comic beyond the artwork.
I'm kinda understanding now, But yeah. Your method of storytelling isnt....potent enough for this to feel worth it. The characters are minimally developed, and the short length and speech less comics makes it hard for us to have anything to grab onto. Its like, just as you could begin to give me that little something that would make me say "Ohhh I get it." You snatch it away.
and I mean, I understand you want it alittle open and you are moving on, but you've been working on these for a long freaking time, You have to have some desire for them to be interesting.
now, with the body and spirit thing, there is a little something there i suppose- but it still doesn't feel relevant enough. you havent done anything, even with that metaphor in mind, that serves to accomplish anything. Be it story development, character development, poetic expression, philosophical expression, or even conceptual discussion- it isnt here.
I generally disagree with what most of you are saying. I don't expect much more than these give, and I like what they give. I didn't think of "body and spirit" before, and now it makes even more sense than it did before. Keep it up. Your art style works for these, but considering it's been such a long time if art is a serious part of your life I suggest finishing these faster and moving on to more serious art and practice.
srsizzy on
BRO LET ME GET REAL WITH YOU AND SAY THAT MY FINGERS ARE PREPPED AND HOT LIKE THE SURFACE OF THE SUN TO BRING RADICAL BEATS SO SMOOTH THE SHIT WILL BE MEDICINAL-GRADE TRIPNASTY MAKING ALL BRAINWAVES ROLL ON THE SURFACE OF A BALLS-FEISTY NEURAL RAINBOW CRACKA-LACKIN' YOUR PERCEPTION OF THE HERE-NOW SPACE-TIME SITUATION THAT ALL OF LIFE BE JAMMED UP IN THROUGH THE UNIVERSAL FLOW BEATS
i disagree, i think there is a good deal of poetic and philosophical expression...its just very very boring
I mean, I can clearly see the attempt (after the body spirit thing was given)- but a "good deal"? If you mean quantitative, then I suppose because there are several issues posted, but qualatatively I dont see a good deal of substance.
well, i can see how you are disapointed when you expect a regular comicstory. there isnt supposed to be a pay off in the form of a gag, or a funny twist and adding such a thing would completely drift into a direction i dont want. there ARE pages which i think contain very important messages (to me anyway ), however, there are just as many pages that are just supposed to set a certain mood, almost like a sole picture on its own. you might as well ask me what the point of lookig at pictures is... you can look at them, just studying their art, or you can think about what the artist wanted to say when creating it. if the pages dont resonate with you, thats fine, i certainly see how theres very little to grab on when you want to have a story or strong characterization. i certainly dont plan to have a blunt explanation go along them when i release them, like i did in this thread, i could go a lot more deeply into what i think it is or represents, but this is not the time or palce for that
i think this new page, especially, is an example for what you dont like about it. it is supposed to reproduce a certain state of mind, a mood and nothing else. it is a little shallow this time, but thats fine, because eventually its purpose will be to take its place between some more complicated pages and looking at the project as a whole it makes perfect sense.
but, as always, ill take your advice with me and think about it. i dont want to deal with characterization on pages where it doesnt belong, but if you felt that that is something that is missing, it might really be necessary to give you a little more from that. the next few pages should be a great opportunity for it.
and finally, i know ive been working on these for a long time now, but thats just because i have very little time for useless projects like this. i can sit down every few months and get another page done and of course, thats pretty frustrating, but for once i want to finish a project i started, so as long as im enjoying them, its fine. the various lessons i took from this whole experimental thing are very usefull anyway, even if in the end noone at all would like htem.
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i get what your saying, maybe once the project is finished we can crit it as a whole, since the message might make more impact then.
but as it is, the message is there, i dont think anyone here doesn't "get it" so to speak, its just that...mmm how to say, we are expecting french vanilla, and you are giving us ground ice with sugar on top, message-wise, not artwise.
but still, i'll hold off any judgement until i see the final product, wtih which i assume u want to leave a person with the impression of "aaah, interesting..." as apposed to /yawn /shrug.
They make a bit more sense if you don't look at these as seperate strips but read them in order and consider them a semi-continuous narrative. It doesn't work as a comic strip, but it might work as a comic book. Maybe you can use that mentality to create a final strip at the end of the series of them that offers some type of conclusion, and make it into a minicomic? It would make a lot more sense as a whole than seperated into parts.
they are supposed to be read as a whole, once im done. its going to be 13 pages, which i wrote a while ago and that will be it.
honestly though, if you cant stand the progress so far, i dont see how any end should change that
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they are supposed to be read as a whole, once im done. its going to be 13 pages, which i wrote a while ago and that will be it.
honestly though, if you cant stand the progress so far, i dont see how any end should change that
Well, it depends on how you end it, doesn't it? I didn't say I can't stand it - it's charming in a surreal, non-sequitur way. I'm sure a lot of people would like it if you put it out there as a finished whole with a comprehensible conclusion... or maybe not. People like esoteric stuff, too.
I guess my point is, instead of showing it off a page at a time and having people complain about it not being funny or making sense, you should finish it and show it as a whole, so people can judge it as a whole. It'd be a nice little minicomic to have - I've seen stuff selling in comic shops that have a lot less going for it than this. But finish it first, THEN ask for opinions - you've been posting it as a WIP for a while now and getting the same reactions from everyone.
I donno, Im not trying to say the mood needs to be something else, I dont think its needs to be funny or whatever. I Just think its not fleshing out the concept as optimally as it could. Its kinda like how copper gets that feeling of whimsy and thoughtfulness just by being that long/strange format and throwing in those lush colors and strange dialog. I think you could stretch somethings and I think you should consider the other ways you could have approched this. Not saying you should deviate from the plan you have, but for growing from critiques sake.
But, I could feel differently about it when they are all together.
they are supposed to be read as a whole, once im done. its going to be 13 pages, which i wrote a while ago and that will be it.
honestly though, if you cant stand the progress so far, i dont see how any end should change that
Well, it depends on how you end it, doesn't it? I didn't say I can't stand it - it's charming in a surreal, non-sequitur way. I'm sure a lot of people would like it if you put it out there as a finished whole with a comprehensible conclusion... or maybe not. People like esoteric stuff, too.
I guess my point is, instead of showing it off a page at a time and having people complain about it not being funny or making sense, you should finish it and show it as a whole, so people can judge it as a whole. It'd be a nice little minicomic to have - I've seen stuff selling in comic shops that have a lot less going for it than this. But finish it first, THEN ask for opinions - you've been posting it as a WIP for a while now and getting the same reactions from everyone.
actually ive been collecting valuable feedback here, it did appeal to a lot of people, but ive always been coming here to hear what i dont want to hear and i usually consider a lot of the advice for future pages. yeha, it might ruin the experience for you, but youre here for WORK not for entertainment
carmofin on
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Posts
Im sorry if thats a vauge crit. I actually really like your color choices.
geek comic
www.hijinksensue.com
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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its just that..well whats the point? i get through reading a page and it doesn't really do anything for me. other than "that was a very well drawn lack of punchline"
i cant give any specific advice off the top of my head, but do you think you could do something more with the comic? maybe present a humorous situation where body and spirit diverge; it would do wonders to grab attention to the comic beyond the artwork.
and I mean, I understand you want it alittle open and you are moving on, but you've been working on these for a long freaking time, You have to have some desire for them to be interesting.
I mean, I can clearly see the attempt (after the body spirit thing was given)- but a "good deal"? If you mean quantitative, then I suppose because there are several issues posted, but qualatatively I dont see a good deal of substance.
i think this new page, especially, is an example for what you dont like about it. it is supposed to reproduce a certain state of mind, a mood and nothing else. it is a little shallow this time, but thats fine, because eventually its purpose will be to take its place between some more complicated pages and looking at the project as a whole it makes perfect sense.
but, as always, ill take your advice with me and think about it. i dont want to deal with characterization on pages where it doesnt belong, but if you felt that that is something that is missing, it might really be necessary to give you a little more from that. the next few pages should be a great opportunity for it.
and finally, i know ive been working on these for a long time now, but thats just because i have very little time for useless projects like this. i can sit down every few months and get another page done and of course, thats pretty frustrating, but for once i want to finish a project i started, so as long as im enjoying them, its fine. the various lessons i took from this whole experimental thing are very usefull anyway, even if in the end noone at all would like htem.
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but as it is, the message is there, i dont think anyone here doesn't "get it" so to speak, its just that...mmm how to say, we are expecting french vanilla, and you are giving us ground ice with sugar on top, message-wise, not artwise.
but still, i'll hold off any judgement until i see the final product, wtih which i assume u want to leave a person with the impression of "aaah, interesting..." as apposed to /yawn /shrug.
honestly though, if you cant stand the progress so far, i dont see how any end should change that
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i suggest bewbies
Well, it depends on how you end it, doesn't it? I didn't say I can't stand it - it's charming in a surreal, non-sequitur way. I'm sure a lot of people would like it if you put it out there as a finished whole with a comprehensible conclusion... or maybe not. People like esoteric stuff, too.
I guess my point is, instead of showing it off a page at a time and having people complain about it not being funny or making sense, you should finish it and show it as a whole, so people can judge it as a whole. It'd be a nice little minicomic to have - I've seen stuff selling in comic shops that have a lot less going for it than this. But finish it first, THEN ask for opinions - you've been posting it as a WIP for a while now and getting the same reactions from everyone.
add bewbies
But, I could feel differently about it when they are all together.
actually ive been collecting valuable feedback here, it did appeal to a lot of people, but ive always been coming here to hear what i dont want to hear and i usually consider a lot of the advice for future pages. yeha, it might ruin the experience for you, but youre here for WORK not for entertainment
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