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What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever said to a female?
Blake TDo you have enemies then?Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered Userregular
edited August 2007
One time I laughed at my ex-girlfriend when she used the term "make love".
I was in alot of trouble over this. The worst part was when she asked me what I call it and I could not for the life of me think of any terms that wouldn't insult her. The only two that I could think of was just fuck and bone.
One time I laughed at my ex-girlfriend when she used the term "make love".
I was in alot of trouble over this. The worst part was when she asked me what I call it and I could not for the life of me think of any terms that wouldn't insult her. The only two that I could think of was just fuck and bone.
I was working this job with a girl I liked. We didn't see much of each other during most of the day because she worked in the field and I worked in the "command station" as we called it. It was little more than a trailer and a batch of walkie-talkies to keep us in contact with each other. So some days this girl and I would be talking over the radio, just her and I. Mainly she asked a lot of questions about the job, different procedures, rules, regulations. Basic stuff. I was right about to work up the nerve to ask her out some time and she comes out at me saying she's cutting. She starts asking me how she should do it and I'm like "Fuck, this is too much" and just unsure of how to answer. The bomb detonated and she hasn't talked to me since.
Stale you are just bitter. Capture the Flag is an awesome game. I haven't played it since I was in the Scouts but it was so much damn fun. We'd play it for hours sometimes. Until it got dark.
I've never considered it a "kid's game" because I never played it as a kid. Always as a teenager.
I'm having a hard time thinking of specific occurrences but something pretty embarrassing involving a chick happened to me at a party once.
I was standing around with my roommate when we were informed that this stupid fat whore had pushed down the broken window in my roommates car and was fucking some dude in his backseat. This orca was fucking dirty, as was whoever she was with from having touched her, and I said that there was no way this bullshit was going to go down and that we should go down there and make her get out of his goddamn car and spread her filth somewhere else. I didn't phrase it that way, but it's what I was thinking.
Well her bitch friend heard me, and you have to understand that she's the biggest bitch I've ever known. She had once spit on my roommate and freaked out on him because he had mentioned he voted conservative. So she comes over and starts screaming at me about how I'm a sack of shit and how she was going to kick my ass and have her gangster friends shoot me etc. etc. if I did anything to fuck with her friend.
When she was satisfied with her tirade she turned around and walked away, and I, feeling the need to defend myself and not wanting to put up with her bullshit, could only come up with the remark: "Nice ass, you fucking bitch."
She turned around, stalked over, and clubbed me. I tried to get an arm up to block but... no luck. The bitch nailed me hard.
Part of me wanted to hit her back because, hey, I believe in equality, but I knew I kinda deserved it, and that stuff like a dude hitting a chick is how gang beatings happen at parties, so I did all I could think of - which was another asshole remark. "Fuck, that made me hard."
I sometimes play a weird version of "Capture The Flag". However, no capturing or flag things are involved, just grabbing a friend in a headlock and calling him jewboy.
I stopped at the word orca cuz it made me think of THE STACKS THAT SHALL NOT BE NAMED
Yeah, whenever I read or hear the word Orca my brain automatically adds stacks to the end. SE++ has damaged my brain. Either that or it was all the paint chips I consumed as a child.
"Take it to the corner, thundercunt" would have probably leapt to my lips. When my anger takes over I either cannot form complete sentences or I blurt out the most perfect shit I could have ever thought up to the point where later on I'm trying to remember everything I said and just going "wow...".
And yeah, just knock on the window and wave. Shamu probably would have been out of there like a hippo, falling over her own cankles.
We just finished our production of Alice in Wonderland for the state one-act play contest, our costumes were nothing but white unitards and some junky hats and shit. I had to do Taming of the Shrew that same night so I had to leave before the awards ceremony, I was getting out of the unitard(No undies, I forgot my jockstrap) and BAM in comes the entire female cast, they wanted to touch up their make-up. Luckily I was able to cover my naughty bits with a conveniently located pile of socks.
Posts
I was in alot of trouble over this. The worst part was when she asked me what I call it and I could not for the life of me think of any terms that wouldn't insult her. The only two that I could think of was just fuck and bone.
Satans..... hints.....
so really I shouldn't have done that
but I mean
I was real pissed
that is a terrifying fact if you remember some of the really terrible ones
"settle"
do people actually get together and play games like that?
cross me all you want
just don't fuck with my buddy when he's down
some people do.
well it's just for fun
cuz like in Shanghai
expats find various ways to entertain themselves
and one of the more famous "event groups" call themselves the Bad Cats
and they set shit up like water fights, pillow fights, and capture the flag matches
just for shits and giggles
in an effort to spare our over-taxed livers
well it would be very long (very)
Later that day she had one of her friends tell me that she hated my guts.
that sounds very very odd
I would be intensely uncomfortable playing a childs game as an adult
How do you say shitsmoker in Chinese?
Satans..... hints.....
I wouldn't have a lot of nickles
cuz like
I generally don't remember what I said unless it was part of a really good story
or unless it didn't involve alcohol
which it usually does
shitsmokel
but you have to squint your eyes
Stale
I work 9-6 in an office
wearing a tight-ass suit
crunching numbers and reading contracts and making deals and conducting interviews
being ultra serious and ultra presentable all the time
every so often
you gotta cut loose and just be a goddamned kid again
have a little rambunctious fun
just for shits and giggles
what's life without fun just for the sake of fun
without having to worry about what's a kid's game and what's not, eh... I mean who decides what's a kid's game and what's not?
plus you're gonna have those people who look at those 40+-year-old gamers and lift an eyebrow
you tellin' me you don't lump that in the same category?
how's that fair?
The exchange was conducted completely in English, btw.
I've never considered it a "kid's game" because I never played it as a kid. Always as a teenager.
You should be jealous of Viv.
Psylocke
I was standing around with my roommate when we were informed that this stupid fat whore had pushed down the broken window in my roommates car and was fucking some dude in his backseat. This orca was fucking dirty, as was whoever she was with from having touched her, and I said that there was no way this bullshit was going to go down and that we should go down there and make her get out of his goddamn car and spread her filth somewhere else. I didn't phrase it that way, but it's what I was thinking.
Well her bitch friend heard me, and you have to understand that she's the biggest bitch I've ever known. She had once spit on my roommate and freaked out on him because he had mentioned he voted conservative. So she comes over and starts screaming at me about how I'm a sack of shit and how she was going to kick my ass and have her gangster friends shoot me etc. etc. if I did anything to fuck with her friend.
When she was satisfied with her tirade she turned around and walked away, and I, feeling the need to defend myself and not wanting to put up with her bullshit, could only come up with the remark: "Nice ass, you fucking bitch."
She turned around, stalked over, and clubbed me. I tried to get an arm up to block but... no luck. The bitch nailed me hard.
Part of me wanted to hit her back because, hey, I believe in equality, but I knew I kinda deserved it, and that stuff like a dude hitting a chick is how gang beatings happen at parties, so I did all I could think of - which was another asshole remark. "Fuck, that made me hard."
Thankfully, I don't think she heard me.
This is a truly arseholish comment.
Satans..... hints.....
Yeah, whenever I read or hear the word Orca my brain automatically adds stacks to the end. SE++ has damaged my brain. Either that or it was all the paint chips I consumed as a child.
Also now Viv has got that damn whale and his damn friends in my head playing DDR.
When I'm not pissed, only nasty, mean things materialize in my brain.
"Nice ass, you fucking bitch" is first of all not very mean at all and certainly not deserving (in my opinion) of being punched in the head.
Yes. You definitely should've hit her back. I would've. In the nose and then right in the cervix.
Oh man the current image in my head is beyond hilarious.
And yeah, just knock on the window and wave. Shamu probably would have been out of there like a hippo, falling over her own cankles.
lawlz
After she disappeared into the crowd we moved down to his car and told her to get out. They were both too drunk to argue and thankfully complied.
The real kicker was the next day, when we found a used condom in the back of his car.
That was fucking pleasant.
One thing was thrust onto me though.
We just finished our production of Alice in Wonderland for the state one-act play contest, our costumes were nothing but white unitards and some junky hats and shit. I had to do Taming of the Shrew that same night so I had to leave before the awards ceremony, I was getting out of the unitard(No undies, I forgot my jockstrap) and BAM in comes the entire female cast, they wanted to touch up their make-up. Luckily I was able to cover my naughty bits with a conveniently located pile of socks.
XBL : lJesse Custerl | MWO: Jesse Custer | Best vid ever. | 2nd best vid ever.
tracked down that fat friend
and forced that used condom down her throat